Chapter 36: Kindling the Flame
AN: Well, I've certainly been keeping myself busy. Three chapters in two days. Hooray for no responsibilities.
I will always be the first to admit mistakes, and I apparently made another big one last chapter: I had no intention nor idea that the whole Molotov Cocktail ship teasing would be such a big part of the chapter. Honestly, I was going for more of the slice of life/general shenanigans stuff to play the prominent role there. So… yeah, I fucked up there. So for my attempts at repentance, you get… more Molotov Cocktail ship teasing! Though this time, it's from the two that are actually in the ship, and it's intentional this time.
In today's Yang-centric chapter, a certain blonde brawler is threatening to turn Yangsty on us. It's up to her partner to out-emo her, before the two have a heart to heart and Yang starts shipping Molotov Cocktail along with the rest of us.
(Perspective: Yang)
Yang woke up in a cold sweat. Sighing and running her hands down her face, she checked the time on her Scroll. One thirty on Saturday morning, and the third time I've woken up tonight. This is getting ridiculous. Rolling her head over, she caught a glimpse of a couple of her teammates. Weiss, as prim and proper in sleep as when awake, made no noise as the back presented to her rose and fell gently with each breath. Above her, her dear sister Ruby continued to be adorable. Tiny little snores escaped from her lips from time to time as the team leader sprawled out under her covers. Moving to stare at the bed above her, Yang considered the partner she had swapped beds with resting above her. Kassidy tried to be as stealthy and paranoid in her rest as in her regular life. Deathly silent, only the briefest rise and fall of her chest to indicate she was still breathing, and she slept so lightly that it only took the slightest noise to wake her up. Rolling over with a huff, Yang pulled the covers tighter around her and tried to will herself back to sleep. Her traitorous brain, on the other hand, refused to stay still.
Whatever medication she was taking for her recovery was so strong it left her in a stupor for the majority of the time. The only times she felt fully sober were those blessed short times in the morning before the nurse came with their medication. Or that impromptu cuddle session with Kassidy… which I'm pretty sure we both enjoyed more than either of us would admit. Still though, ever since Yang had felt well enough to do more than laze around in bed, she had started prying her teammates about what had happened. Weiss didn't offer anything truly useful, and Ruby wouldn't talk about it. Kassidy was content to outright ignore her as much as she could, and so there was only one option left. After all, Kassidy's paranoia led her to record everything she saw and heard, and Bob kept all those recordings. It took a bit of prying, but eventually she got the computer to open up and show her what all had happened that night.
And so Yang watched. Yang watched as she blindly rushed to fight the Alpha that had come out of nowhere. She watched as she wasn't strong enough to finish the job, and nearly got killed for her recklessness. She watched as Kassidy and Ruby carried them to safety. She watched as her partner fought to save her life. She watched as Ruby was getting torn apart by her condition. She watched as Kassidy nearly killed herself finishing the fight she had started. That was bad enough.
The worst of it was when Yang watched, or, more appropriately, listened as Kassidy confided in Bob. As she talked about how leaving Yang to die would've been the smart decision – a move that, as much as Yang hated to admit it, would've indeed been the smart decision. As she talked about how she was getting too close to the team, and needed to separate herself from them. As she talked about how much better off she'd be without Yang. Of course, those words were never spoken or even hinted at, but that was the conclusion Yang had drawn.
Their constant coddling only served to reinforce her opinion that she was dead weight to the rest of the team. Weiss tolerated her as long as she didn't keep her from studying. Ruby was so focused on helping her that she was falling behind in her own studies and responsibilities. And Kassidy seemed to be outright avoiding her. Maybe I am dead weight. If I can't protect my friends, then what am I good for? I need to be looking out for them, but they're wasting time looking out for me now. If I can't punch a measly Grimm, then how am I contributing to the team?
Sighing, Yang gave up on sleep. Terrorizing a punching bag or five was always a good way to get her thoughts in order, and it wasn't like she was going to be getting some rest anytime soon anyways. She was supposed to be fully released from treatments later that morning, so surely she was fine now, wasn't she? Taking great care to try and not wake Kassidy, she grabbed her gym bag from the corner and left the room, heading towards the gyms and being thankful they were one of the few campus facilities that were open twenty four hours a day.
As she padded along, Yang's thoughts continued to run wild. And to make matters worse, Kassidy's been doing her level best to not be anywhere near me all week. Probably because I left her to clean up after me as well as the whole dating thing we're not doing. Oum, she's been practically walking up walls from how much stress she's been feeling with this whole rumor thing. Yeah, I definitely need to talk to Rubes and Ice Queen about that. Like she'd even want a failure like me anyw-
"Was wondering when you'd get here." The sudden voice nearly made Yang fall over in shock as she entered the gym. Looking to her left, she saw Kassidy put the bar down as she finished a set of bench presses. "Starting to think you would just mope around in bed until the end of time."
"Hey, partner, I thought you'd be asleep. What are you doing here?"
"Mostly waiting on you."
Yang was genuinely shocked. "How –"
Kassidy cut her off with a disappointed expression. "Look, Yang, I know why you're here. I'm a pretty damn observant person, and I can tell you're having issues. The thoughts about how you're not good enough, that you don't deserve those around you?" Nervously, Yang gave a nod. "I know what you're going through. And I'm here to snap you out of it."
Yang sighed, before trudging off to the corner with the punching bags. "Maybe later, partner. I'm not really in the mood right now." She was stopped when a pair of boxing gloves hit her in the face.
"Nope. You not being in the mood is exactly why we're doing this now. Besides," Kassidy gave a cheeky grin, "Live targets are more fun to hit. So get those gloves on and get in the ring. Let's go a few rounds."
With no small amount of trepidation, Yang made her way over to the fighting ring in question. Kassidy had already gotten her gloves on and started bouncing in place and stretching out to loosen her muscles. Woah, she's pretty serious about this. Is this her form of payback for me leaving her to take care of my problems that weekend?
"Wow, we're that far into the pity party already, huh?" The sudden question jolted Yang back to her senses. "Alright, this fight's gonna be a little different."
"I'd hope so. You haven't been out of recovery for much longer than I have been. Last thing I want to do now is hurt you in a spar." Stretching out her own muscles, Yang could tell she was still stiff from the past week of inactivity as well as from injured muscles that still needed that little bit of time to finish the healing process. She was startled, however, when Kassidy chuckled.
"Oh, you think this is a spar, how cute." The chuckle got replaced with an incredibly serious face as her partner got in a fighting stance. "For a multitude of reasons, you've decided you're not good enough for the team. I'd like to think I know you pretty well, and I definitely know the thought process behind that notion, so I'm not going to even bother wasting my breath by telling you that's a false notion. Which, by the way, it's a false notion. So, in light of that information, here's how this fight is going to work: we're going to march to the center of this here ring, take a few swings at each other, and then I'm going to kick your ass." Yang's eyes widened even as she gave an involuntary snort at the bold claim. "I don't care if you have an aura. I'm going to kick your ass, and I'm going to keep kicking your ass until you're done with being sorry for yourself and start kicking my ass instead."
Yang was rather taken aback by her partner's commanding tone. Sure, Kassidy usually made her mind up quickly and wasted no time in following through. But straight up taking charge was something she almost never did, preferring to let someone else tackle the bigger issues. Her ruminations were ended as she needed to duck a left hook thrown by her partner. That, however, was just what Kassidy was looking for as she buried her other fist into Yang's gut. Her aura flared angrily to absorb the blow, but it didn't stop her from folding over the glove. Her shoulders were grabbed and Yang got half-thrown, half-shoved into the middle of the ring.
Well, if it's a fight she wants, I guess I better oblige her. Maybe she'll be able to learn a few things. This wasn't that spar the first week of school where Kassidy didn't even know how to throw a punch without hurting herself. Nora's weight training had been paying dividends; she still wasn't putting muscle on quickly, but her strength was leagues ahead of where it used to be. Kassidy was faster, smarter, reacted quicker, had a better reach, and she could fight for longer. At this point, Yang's only advantages were her strength, her aura, and vastly superior skill.
Those advantages were only enough for Yang to keep in the game. Sure, it didn't help that she was still stiff and sore, but Kassidy wasn't here to play around. Taking full advantage of the fact that her aura would prevent any real damage, her partner laid into her with all the force she could muster. Meanwhile, she kept weaving around everything Yang threw at her. Quickly giving up on landing anything more than a glancing blow on her partner, Yang focused on keeping a solid guard up.
Kassidy didn't like that answer, as she grappled Yang and tried to break her guard that way. Really, partner? Come on now, we both know that you're nowhere strong enough to shove me around like that. Though it seemed like shoving her around wasn't Kassidy's intentions as a foot swept Yang's legs out from under her before sending her sprawling with a roundhouse kick.
"Quit telling yourself that it's the stiff and sore muscles that's letting me beat you. It's not the stiff and sore muscles. You're holding back on me. Quit holding back!" Kassidy emphasized the last statement with a right jab into the breadbasket, making Yang give more ground. Yang was about to stand there and let Kassidy continue to wale on her before thinking for a moment. Kassidy has always been a very deliberate person. Is she really so sure that my muscles aren't to blame? Deciding to test the theory, Yang interrupted her partner's beating on her guard with a punch that laid Kassidy out. A brief panic attack subsided when her partner quickly shot up and got back in the fight as fierce as ever.
Yang felt more confident in both her own body's abilities and in her partner's ability to eat a punch, and started putting more force into the fight. Keeping her guard up to eat punches, she pressed forward and started working in her own offense. None of her punches connected, however, as Kassidy sped up herself. She gave up on trying to outmuscle Yang, instead settled for a faster if weaker pace, trying to dance around her guard and land blows on her sides. Yang decided she'd humored Kassidy enough, knowing that she'd be vulnerable to a well-timed hook right about… now.
What Yang didn't expect was for Kassidy to grab her arm, twist it behind her, and shove her into the mat. Kassidy stood over the top of her, pressing her harder onto the surface of the ring. "You have zero excuse to be losing this fight. If you put forth this little effort the next time we're in trouble, you're going to find yourself down some teammates real damn fast." Her eyes flashed red at the insinuation that she would just leave her friends to die. With a pulse of Aura augmenting her strength, Yang broke out of the hold she was in and threw Kassidy to the other side of the ring.
Yang decided to up the pressure some more. Pressing forward and seizing control of the initiative, she started really letting the punches fly. Kassidy found herself on the defense now, ducking and weaving around Yang's attacks and seldom getting a chance to retaliate. Right straight, left uppercut, roundhouse kick, right jab. Yang felt she was back in her groove, and she kept the heat up. Right up until Kassidy was a bit too slow and ate a particularly hard punch with her face. She stumbled back in a spray of blood, clutching at her nose. Yang instantly rushed forward, regret pooling as she realized what she'd done. Because it wasn't bad enough I let everyone down last weekend. I had to go and hurt my partner again. Ugh, why can't I get my act together?! Her train of thought was interrupted when she got punched in the face herself.
"I'm not some delicate piece of crap. You like solving your problems by hitting them until they give up? Alright, then. Hit me!"
She decided she was done with playing around for the night. If Kassidy wasn't smart enough to stay down before she got really hurt, then Yang would need to make her stay down. They both strode forward, and Yang opened up instantly, no longer holding back. As they dodged and weaved around each other's strikes, Yang noticed that while Kassidy was quick in her reactions, she was significantly less quick on her feet. Maybe related to the fact that she's not very flexible? That's as good an advantage to press as any other. Getting more mobile, Yang pressed Kassidy into the corner, forcing her to eat more and more punches. Kassidy dodged as best as she could, blocked what she could, but was sorely outclassed and knew it. Sinking to the ground after a final haymaker, her partner elected to hold a hand up in surrender rather than getting back up to keep fighting.
"There we go. There's the Yang I partnered up with." Taking the offered hand, Kassidy padded at her nose with a cloth before taking a draft from her water. "How're you feeling now?"
"I'm feeling…" How do I feel? Hitting something felt nice. The fact that Kassidy was cocky enough to stay that long in the ring with me while talking trash the whole time means she can't be too mad at me, right? "Doing better. Still feel like shit for failing so hard last weekend."
"Ugh, for the last time, you didn't fail jack in that fight." Kassidy rolled her eyes before chucking the canteen in Yang's direction. "In case you've forgotten, you killed two of them, then gave the Alpha the crippling injury I needed to even have a chance against it. You did everything you possibly could have and then some. Even if there was a failure, it wasn't yours."
Yang shook her head in mild awe. "Wow, you're a lot better at this whole 'cheering people up' stuff than I thought you would be. Ever thought of going into counseling?"
Kassidy made her way over to a bench with Yang following her, before collapsing on the bench and sighing. "No, I'm not good at it. I just have a trick up my sleeve in that regard."
"That being?" A severely conflicted look crossed Kassidy's face. Alright, something ain't right here. "C'mon partner, if something's wrong you know you can talk to me. You've put up with my crap tonight, least I can do is put up with your crap."
A small, sad smirk manifested before Kassidy sighed miserably. "Would you care to take a guess as to how I knew that you were having trouble sleeping? How I knew that you would come to the gym to take your frustrations out on a punching bag or five? How I knew exactly what was going through your head? How I knew that you were so distraught that I actually had a chance of winning a fistfight against you – at least for a little bit?"
Yang shrugged. "You aren't exactly stupid, and I'm not exactly subtle."
"My intelligence and your blatancy has nothing to do with how I knew all that." Rubbing at her face, Kassidy leaned back. "Bob told me you had him show you what all went down after you got knocked out. How you obsessed over the conversation I had with him." A panicked look shot across Yang's visage before Kassidy held a calming hand up. "You seriously think my computer can keep secrets from me for any meaningful length of time? Anyways, I know exactly how you reacted to that conversation. You felt that I wanted nothing to do with you, that I would be better without you. That about right?"
Alright, this is starting to get a bit creepy how she's exactly guessing what I've been going through. "On the nose. That's pretty perceptive for you."
"The reason I know…" Kassidy sighed deeply. "Is because I'm talking from first-hand experience."
"Um… you mean you've been through this before?"
"I've been through exactly this before. Well, not exactly. Last time, I couldn't save him. I let him die…" Kassidy wore a wistful expression. The return of Matthew. Who is this guy that his mere mention eats you up so?
"Still not talking about him, I assume?"
"Matt dying was the last straw for me. I couldn't take it anymore, and my mind broke."
"Uh, you seem pretty sane to me."
"Then boy do I have you fooled. You haven't been sleeping well the past couple days, have you? The guilt, the shame, and the constant coddling didn't help either I bet. That's part of the reason why I've been staying away from you for the past couple days. I knew that until you were ready to do something about it, anything I could say would've only made things worse."
"I wasn't that bad, partner. I mean, yeah, I was pretty bummed for a couple days, but I was fine."
"No, you weren't that bad. You were worse, and getting even worse than that."
"What makes you say that?"
"You were turning into me."
Yang shrugged. "I'm not convinced that's such a bad thing. You don't seem to be that bad a person."
Kassidy chuckled grimly. "Oh, how bliss ignorance can be. But getting to the point, turning into me would've been very bad for you. The bad sleep you've been getting? The first stages of insomnia."
"And you would know that how?"
Kassidy stared a hole into a wall over to the side, no longer willing to make eye contact. "You know how I only get six hours of sleep a night? Well, it's not a good six hours. It's light at best, and I wake up often. It's more like a four or five hour catnap than anything."
Yang thought of how would be best to try and convince her partner things weren't that bad. "You seem to be plenty rested –"
"Did you know that before I came to Beacon, back when it was that bedroll instead of an actual bed, I only got three hours of sleep?"
"I'm sure –"
"This morning will start the fourth day since I last slept." Yang paled at the thought, as Kassidy shrugged. "I don't feel tired. I mean, sure, there's the sluggishness you would expect, but my body's not telling me that it absolutely needs sleep. It used to be worse, you know. When it started, I'd go for weeks at a time before my body just finally collapsed from exhaustion."
"I had no idea…"
"Of course you didn't, I did my best to keep it hidden. You're a strong person, and a good person. You deserve better than having to deal with my problems. And I do have problems, Yang. Paranoia, insomnia, anger issues… and that just rounds out the top three."
She used to deal with all of that? I mean, sure, she's still a bit paranoid and she hasn't been getting any sleep lately, but dear Oum. I'd go crazy if I had to go through it. "How did you deal with it?"
"I didn't." The simple, bold declaration made Yang's eyes bug out. "I just try and keep the worst of it to where nobody else can see it. And when it truly gets bad… well, you've seen my drinking problem, hell I made the stupid decision of making you put up with it."
"K…" This is still her life? A living hell? Nobody should have to go through this… "You don't need to keep going through this, you know. You can get help. Let me help you. Let US help you. We're a team, K. Your problems are our problems too."
"I'm past helping. If others can be happy, and if I can keep people like you from dealing with the stuff that I do… that's good enough for me." Suddenly, Kassidy clapped her hands together. "Enough angst for one night, though. Or, should I say Yangst?" She gave a grin that Yang mirrored. Must be feeling better if she's cracking puns. "Off to bed with ya, I've kept you up late enough as it is."
"You first, partner."
"No can do, Yang. I've still got work that I want to get done. Just need to be careful that it's not something that'll snap my neck if I go and drop unconscious in the middle of my workout." Worry crossed Yang's face before Kassidy smirked. "That was a joke, by the way. Now out, ye varmint."
Giving up, Yang slowly stood up, though she did take her sweet time to watch Kassidy. Need to make sure my partner is really okay, after all. Not sure if she should be doing squats in her current state… not that I'm complaining about the view. It might've been a joke earlier, but it wasn't a lie: Kassidy did make small look good. It also helped that her leggings accentuated her well-endowed posterior just fine. No, bad Yang! No ogling over your partner! Still, I won't say no if she decides to start wearing shorts more often.
Shaking her head to banish those particular thoughts, Yang made her way out the door and started walking back to the dorm. Her brain decided to return to her partner, however. How much have you been through, K? How strong does a person have to be to go through what you have, and come out of it more annoyed than anything else? Man, how I wish I could be that strong for Rubes. Being careful not to wake Weiss or Ruby up, Yang crawled back into the lower bunk she had been staying in and tried to drift off to dreamland. Still, though. Even the best of us are only so strong. If this is K starting to crack… I don't care what she says, she needs help. She can't handle all that alone.
You're not alone in this, partner. I'll make sure of it.
(Perspective: Kassidy)
Kassidy waited a good ten seconds after Yang left to ensure she wouldn't return, before racking the weights and collapsing on the nearest bench. Stupid! You got way closer to her than you needed to! You didn't need to go to that extent to make sure Yang didn't follow the same path you did! Sure, she needed help, but that doesn't excuse you from chatting her up! No matter how hot she… wait, what? Snarling at the unwanted and unexpected thought, she toweled her face of its sweat before looking at one of the side rooms and raising her voice. "We didn't scare you that much, Professor, did we? Yang's gone, if that's the problem."
"Not a problem at all, I just wanted to provide the two of you what privacy I could." Professor Goodwitch came back into view and walked over. "Though I must admit to being surprised you saw me."
Kassidy chuckled lightly. "You have to be pretty good to sneak around me. And those heels of yours aren't exactly quiet. Has Professor Port's recovery been going well?"
"He just finished up his physical therapy yesterday, actually. Do you have a few minutes to talk?" Kassidy motioned to the opposite bench, and Glynda sat down. "Ms. Smi – Kassidy, you know there's no such thing as being past help, right? Whatever your issues are, I'm sure that we'll be able to get through them, if you'll allow me."
Kassidy scoffed. "Did you suddenly get a psychology degree when I wasn't looking?"
"As a matter of fact, I did." Kassidy looked up in surprise before Glynda smiled softly. "Why don't we continue this in my office? You definitely won't be able to sleep if you keep working out like this."
"I don't need sleep, I need to get better. Stronger, faster."
"And I have little doubt that will continue to happen with the amount of work you put in. But for now, come up with me." Glynda put a hand on her shoulder. "Even if you're not ready to talk just yet, I was hoping to catch up with you anyway. I was writing an updated report on these Hunter-Killers from your encounter with them, and there's a few details I was hoping to clarify. And I can promise the seats are more comfortable than this bench is."
Well, that spar with Yang did manage to take away my desire to spend all night working out. Ah, what the hell. As long as she knows that she's not getting me to talk. "After you, Professor."
AN 2: And just like that, one half of Molotov Cocktail begins to believe in the ship. Also, consider this your confirmation that Kassidy has a Bellabooty. Well, unless I can think up of more crap to talk about between when I wrote this and when this gets published, let's just skip straight to the Reader Responses.
Coming up next: Black and White isn't so black and white anymore, and the fourth member of the original cast makes her appearance.
Guest: There won't be anything big like that, though the rumors will get tamed just in time for the ship to get out of visual range of the port. Still, no dice on the Matthew request, his part in the story has yet to come.
mcd3424: Glad to hear it, my man. Here's to hoping I can keep entertaining.
Kassidy: Alright, let me first say thank you for the review. I am incredibly sorry that you had to go through that, and here's to hoping you get your friendships patched up and life continues well for ya.
I also want to thank you for making me really think about what kind of impact the kind of teasing I'm writing in might have on a person. Given the closest thing I've ever had to a relationship is with my computer, this is real uncharted territory for me. I've already written up until halfway through chapter 40 at the time of writing this reply, and believe me when I say that your review has made me really rethink and rewrite substantial parts of the story to truly consider the impact their teasing would have.
One more time before I embarrass myself, thank you for the review, thank you for the eye-opening perspective, and here's to a great life and a great relationship for ya.
Tykene: Well, you would be right! Mostly.
James: I may have failed to mention Yang's mostly unconscious/delirious state for the majority of that week. Fret not, that gets reaffirmed here.
AndJrew76: I appreciate the compliments, glad to hear you guys think I'm doing so well.