A/N: I need to work on my existing stories and stop writing new ones… even the tempting one shots derived from bad ideas. That I haven't even started uploading. But I will be uploading one today. Along with this chapter.
Chapter 13
Naruto woke up early and took care of Hiruzen since Sasuke was still asleep. Naruto studied the toddler who was still trying to walk independently and got a few steps in before falling. Hiruzen was adamant that he could do it on his own and would glare when Naruto tried to steady him.
"Just like you father. Mr. Independent." Naruto said ruffling up the red haired toddler causing the baby to fall again. Naruto watched as he used the chair leg to pull himself back up to a standing position and walk forward a bit. Naruto got the Cheerios, having discovered Hiruzen had a borderline obsession with the, and placed them in a bowl. When Hiruzen tried to reach for them Naruto pulled them out of reach. The baby would take a step closer trying to close the distance between them.
This kept up and Hiruzen's smile would rise ever so slightly when he got close to the Cheerios. The baby hadn't even realized he had walked almost the whole room without stumbling or falling. Naruto finally let the baby-no toddler have his prize and Hiruzen immediately dropped onto the floor and started munching.
Naruto looked up to see an impressed Sasuke.
"Good job Hiruzen..." Sasuke said before walking over and placing a kiss on the top of his head. Sasuke placed a kiss on Naruto's lips.
"You look dreadful Teme..."
"Hmmm. I had an emotionally exhausting night." Sasuke said followed by a deep breath.
"Take the day off work and hang out with Hiruzen. You won't do anything helpful at work anyway." Naruto pointed out.
"I'll call Itachi." Sasuke said with a yawn.
"I'm still going to go in though so call you driver too." Naruto said and Sasuke frowned. Well there goes his fun.
"You could stay at home and take care of me..." Sasuke said with a playful tone.
"No... Because then you'd be physically exhausted. You can have your way with me over the weekend." Naruto said and placed a quick kiss on Sasuke's lips and left the area to get ready.
Naruto came out to Hiruzen looking up at him with wide eyes and Naruto got down to his level,"what's wrong Hiruzen?"
"Tay..." The baby said with a sad voice.
"You want me to stay?"
Hiruzen nodded and Sasuke turned and looked the other way finished it with a cough.
"Your daddy is seriously using you... That's wrong Teme. I'll be home after work. I promise."
"Ok." Hiruzen said and walked over to his daddy who gave Hiruzen his sippy cup.
"You are so bad."
"It was worth a try." Sasuke said shrugging his shoulders.
Naruto bid them good bye and headed off to work. It was his day to have the massage chair too.
Naruto arrived at work a little later than he would have liked, but that was Sasuke's fault for not having called the driver when he asked. When he reached the top floor Deidara was already swapping their chairs and Naruto took his seat and sat there for a few hours answering the calls and taking messages.
"Why does it seem like when Sasuke isn't here he is busiest?" Naruto complained.
"His phone is always going off. If he isn't getting a call he's being e-mailed."
"At least most of them are work-related..."
"Wait until 11:30 and that's going to change. If I were you I would unplug that phone from 11:30 till 2. No one business wise will call."
"Why?"
"Cause that's around when he takes his lunch break and Karin along with every other female who obviously hasn't noticed his sexual preference will be calling."
Naruto unplugged the phone at 11:29 and enjoyed the silence for about 30 minutes before he grew bored. He was almost tempted to plug the phone in and answer a few.
"Hey Deidara?"
"Yes."
"Want to have some fun?" Naruto said wagging his eyebrows.
"...yes. But will we get in trouble?"
"Not if Sasuke and Itachi have a cruel sense of humor."
"Let me get Kisame." Deidara said.
All three men went inside Sasuke office.
"Alright. So we are going to actually answer a few of Sasuke's calls, but with a twist. My friend and I used to do this all the time."
Naruto pressed the button to accept a call into Sasuke office and it rang instantly. Kisame and Deidara watched with intrigue.
"Hello and thank you for calling Charlie's whore house- you know 'em we blow 'em. This is Queen Bee speaking how may we service you." Naruto said in a horrible impression of a woman's voice perfectly rehearsed. The woman on the other end stuttered before hanging up and Naruto put the phone down and all three men burst out laughing.
"I got one." Kisame said still laughing he picked up the phone.
"The job is done master... There's blood everywhere, but they have been dealt with-" Kisame paused "she hung up."
"Ok... What should I say... I got it!"
Deidara hopped up and grabbed the phone and picked it up, "You have seven days..." Deidara said and then began to make croaking noises and Kisame and Naruto held their hands over their mouths trying very hard not to laugh.
Naruto hopped up onto the phone for his next turn and picked it up, "Hello. The phone number you have dialed has been disconnected or no longer in service. Please hang up and dial your call again." Naruto said and hung up.
All three men seized their activities when Itachi walked in. Itachi walked over to the phone casually and picked it up, "City morgue. Please state the name of your dearly departed loved one." Itachi said smoothly and after a moment hung up and looked at the other three men in the room before smirking.
"I think we've found a way to alleviate our boredom for the next few hours." Naruto said happily.
Once the calls eventually died off and the men had to go back to work Naruto stayed I. Sasuke's office and started to flip through everything being nosey. Naruto pulled up his e-mail and saw quite a few e-mails from Karin unread. Naruto clicked on a folder that was titled 'Karin' and saw thousands of e-mails. Naruto scrolled and noticed ones from selected dates were read but the majority unread until he hit a few months back where they were all unread. Judging by the dates it's when Hiruzen was a newborn.
Naruto clicked on one and read the short message pleading Sasuke to marry her so they could be a family. Naruto flipped through them and read message after message all ranging from begging him to marry her to insane threats on herself. There was also a lot of nude photos of herself.
Naruto eventually found the timeline from when she was still pregnant and those e-mails where very disturbing. Naruto tried not to cry reading a few of them.
"Hey Naruto..."
Naruto looked up and saw Deidara.
"You ok mini-me?"
"I just can't believe a mother would threaten her baby..." Naruto said quietly.
"Karin... She's something else. She's not a mother I can tell you that. No mother would climb out onto the ledge of a building and threaten to throw herself off if she doesn't get to see the father of her child, while pregnant." Deidara said angrily.
"She seriously did that?"
"She's done some pretty horrible things. She caused hell here for months and Sasuke tried his best to accommodate her, but if it wasn't marriage she wasn't having it."
"Is she insane. Like actually insane?" Naruto asked quietly.
"Yeah. She has a few conditions. I know she's bi-polar, depressed and I think she was diagnosed with schizophrenia." Deidara said quietly.
"And Sasuke let's her watch Hiruzen..."
"Not really. He has Suigetsu stick around her for just that reason. If she gets too crazy or refuses her medication Suigetsu brings the kid back to either Sasuke or Itachi."
"Thank God for Suigetsu..."
"Yeah, if Suigetsu can't do it then Juugo does. But Juugo is usually holding Harley Quinn back."
"She refuses medication and treatment."
"Yes. Mostly. It probably doesn't help that she drinks like a fish out of water and is usually higher than a kite on weekends... At least that's what I've overheard." Deidara said pursing his lips and he walked out.
Naruto pulled out his phone and texted Sasuke asking if Karin was actually insane. It took a moment before Sasuke replied.
"Allegedly. She doesn't let any doctor actually test her thoroughly so we don't know how serious it is."
Naruto texted back, "and your still an unsympathetic ass to her."
"Are you going through my e-mails?"
"Maybe." Naruto replied
"Go to my saved messages and click on the flagged message from Karin."
Naruto did just that and clicked on the e-mail.
'To:SUchiha
From:Karinbaybee
If you don't consent to marry me by midnight I will hire a hit an to kill your entire family and then I'll... '
Naruto stopped reading there. It was a paragraph of graphic detail and threats.
"I'm sorry." Naruto sent.
"It's fine. But she threatened to hurt my family, anyone I fell in love with and my son. I can't feel sorry for her. There was a reason the judge didn't feel the need to give her any custody. That was it. Come home... I'm bored."
Naruto shifted uncomfortably before saying out loud to himself, "I never thought I'd be in a relationship with someone who had a crazy baby momma."
"You're in a relationship with one of the hottest guys on earth who has the craziest baby momma. Crazy hot guy means crazy rabid fan girls. Get used to it!" Deidara yelled.
Naruto tightened his lips and grabbed his things and left. The driver pulled up and brought him back to the condo. Naruto walked into the lobby and saw Karin yelling at the greet/security guard. Poor guy. Naruto walked passed him and almost made it to the safety of the elevator-
"Excuse me! You with the blonde hair!"
Fuuuuuuuuuuuu
Naruto turned and while doing so he prepared himself to handle this civilly and like an adult.
"Take me upstairs to see MY fiancé."
"I'm sorry, but that's not possible." Naruto replied gently.
"Why the hell not!" She screamed
Ok. Lying works too.
"He's not here. He took Hiruzen out." Naruto said with a small smile.
She screamed her frustration out before steadying herself once more,"Let me upstairs and I will wait for him then."
"May I ask the nature of your visit."
"Too see my family. Which you are not apart of." She said nastily.
"No, I am not apart of your family. But I am also not going to let you upstairs either."
Karin threw a tantrum and swung at Naruto hitting him in the eye successfully before being hauled out of the building and getting a warning to never enter again thrown on her. Naruto entered the elevator pitying her. Naruto looked at his reflection in the mirror and made a very educated guess... It was going to bruise and Sasuke was going to throw a bitch fit and tear apart London.
Naruto stepped out of the elevator and knocked on the door and closed his eyes and puckered his lips.
Sasuke opened the door to see his favorite blonde expecting a kiss-except Sasuke was mad he got ditched. So he held Hiruzen forward.
Naruto felt two baby hands grab his cheeks and felt Hiruzen give him a kiss instead of Sasuke. Naruto opened his eyes and took Hiruzen.
"Why thank you Hiruzen!" Naruto said excitedly.
The baby smiled at Naruto and gave him another kiss.
"Will you be my boyfriend Hiruzen... My boyfriend is making me sad by not greeting me when I come home." Naruto said in a sad voice and Hiruzen giggled.
"Hiruzen say No." Sasuke said from the door.
"I'll give you Cheerios if you say yes." Naruto said quickly.
"Yes!" Hiruzen yelled.
"Fine, then both of you get out. Go on. Enjoy your Cheerios dates." Sasuke said pretending to be hurt and even placing a hand over his chest pretending to cry.
"Sad Daddy." Hiruzen said.
"He is very sad isn't he..." Naruto said.
Sasuke walked over and placed a kiss on Naruto's lips and pulled back looking at his eyes when concern developed in his eyes.
"How?" Sasuke demanded.
"Now Teme... It's not as bad as you think. There's no need to tear apart London..." Naruto started.
Sasuke eyes widened and concern morphed into anger.
"Karin was here... She got over excited and hit me... Accidentally." Naruto added the last part in hopes Sasuke wouldn't explode.
"I'll be right back."
Sasuke stormed out the front door and Naruto bit his lips. He looked at Hiruzen sadly who looked back at him in deep thought.
Sasuke returned after a few minutes and he was trying not to completely throw a fit. He looked at Naruto shaking in anger.
"Accident?!" He bit out.
"I didn't want you to get angry..."
"I'm damn near about to murder her! Don't lie to me ever again Naruto. I can't stand that!" Sasuke yelled at the top of his lungs and Hiruzen started to cry and Naruto almost did too. Naruto got up and Sasuke stepped forward suddenly and came to a halt again. Naruto walked toward him and put his arms around him. Naruto laid his head across Sasuke's chest and listened to his heart beat.
"Do you want me to go?" Naruto asked quietly.
"No Dobe. I want you to stay. But don't lie to me. Please." Sasuke said is the most heart shattering tone Naruto had ever heard. Naruto stood up straight and kissed Sasuke on the lips before going over and grabbing the baby and calming him down. Sasuke stood still and shook slightly. He didn't like feeling out of control. He lost his temper and he scared the two people he loved the most.
Sasuke picked up the phone and called Obito... The family lawyer. He was getting a restraining order on her to keep Naruto safe.
Sasuke told Naruto she had to keep 500 feet away, and if she didn't she was spending the night in jail. And every time it happens it went on her record.
"Well, at least my beautiful face won't have to suffer more abuse..." Naruto said sarcastically. When Sasuke remained quiet Naruto decided to break the atmosphere "except for when my boyfriend tongue fucks my mouth or just fucks my mouth." Naruto finished annoyed.
Sasuke pulled Naruto into his chest," that's the inside of your mouth. The only person who should see that damage is myself or a dentist."
Naruto started laughing and Sasuke did a bit as well. "You're so retarded Naruto..."
"But you love me and all the retardedness that I bring and have brought into your dull life!"
"Yes I do love your chaos... But my life was anything but dull before you threw it into a whole knew level of crazy."
"The good kind right?"
"Very good."