Quote of the day: To love someone means to give them the power to break your heart.

Chapter 20

"Bella!" I saw a flash of black hair and copper skin before Sue Clearwater pulled open the front door and dragged me into a hug. When she pulled back I looked at her. Like most Quileute's she was beautiful. Sue had a thin face with black eyes and short black hair and she radiated an inner beauty that could attract anyone.

"Hi." I greeted lamely. I didn't have anything else to say but I knew she would be understanding, what with the circumstances that caused me to be under her care.

"Come on, lets get you out of the cold." Sue's hand wrapped around my wrist and dragged me into the Clearwater's home.

As I walked into the house I found myself in a narrow hallway. To my right, there was the doorway into the living room. The living room had two brown leather armchairs and a three seater brown leather sofa. The walls were painted beige and there was a rich brown rug in the middle of the room with a coffee table. Along the walls were shelves and shelves of books, DVDs and other reading materials, and in the living room there was a staircase.

Sue continued to lead me into the kitchen where she told me to give my bags to Seth so he could take them upstairs. There kitchen looked almost exactly like Billy's. A wooden table sat in front of a counter, and there was a stove along with the regular cooking equipment. Leah and Harry sat on a chair at the table.

"Bella, good to see you. How was the trip?" Harry asked as if it had taken me five hours instead of one hours to get here.

"It was good." I answered politely, although the trip was anything but good. My first impression of Louise had been right- her calm cold exterior could probably make a vampire shiver.

"That's good." He said and then there was an awkward silence before he continued. "Right there are a few rules we would like to inform you about..."

"Of course." I encouraged.

"...Curfew on the week days will be at ten o'clock and on the weekends twelve o'clock. On Sunday's everyone comes home at six o'clock for family dinner. Other than that you are free to do what you please, except..."

"No drugs, alcohol or anything else illegal." I finished remembering that Charlie had given me a similar talk. "Got it."

Harry nodded his agreement.

"Okay." Sue said, "Bella why doesn't Leah show you around and help you get comfortable."

I nodded but I heard Leah give a small whine. However one glance for Harry and she did as she was told. Leah lead me upstairs and pointed out everyone rooms and the bathroom.

"...and this is your room." Leah finished indicating for me to go in. A double bed sat in the corner of the room with a bedside cabinet. There was a desk, a chest of drawers and a wardrobe.

"Thanks." I smiled at her but she didn't return it. I could see in her eyes that she probably couldn't find the will to smile anymore. "Do you want to talk about it? I'm a good listener." I offered politely.

Leah snorted, "No." As if the idea of talking to someone repulsed her.

I shrugged my shoulders and said, "You know, most people think that the most painful thing is loosing the one you value, the truth is, the most painful thing is loosing yourself in the process of valuing someone too much. Don't loose yourself Leah, not over someone who doesn't value you as much as you value them."

Leah stood there for a moment with her mouth slightly open. Then she turned around and left, not saying a word, not even looking back.

It didn't take me long to settle into my new room, maybe about half and hour. By the time I had done I decided that it would be best to contact Edward, ever since he had scented Jacob at the funeral he new that the wolves were back and that made him worry more than ever.

I strolled through my contacts list and found Edwards number, then I pressed the call button and held it against my ear.

"Bella." Edwards voice sounded panicked.
"Hi, Edward."
"Bella, thank God, I thought something had happened to you. Alice said that your future disappeared..."
"Edward I am fine. Alice's ability just can't see past the wolves but I am fine." When I heard Edwards grunt of disbelief, I said more firmly, "They won't hurt me, Edward. They can't."
Edward sighed, "I know but be careful, they are still dangerous..."
"Don't worry."
"Bella, how can I not worry? You are probably the clumsiest human alive."
"Yeah, yeah" I rolled my eyes, "We all know about my luck, I may never win the lottery but I would probably get hit by lightning."
"Bella..."
"Okay, I promise I will try not to get myself into anymore trouble. I have to go now, bye Edward."
"Bye, love you."
"Love you too." And I hung up.

I tried to go to sleep but I couldn't, it seemed like everything just went so wrong. I'm so mad at myself for changing the future! If I could have just let everything happen as I had seen it, none of this would have happened. Charlie would still be alive! Why did I have to change everything?! I can no longer blame Edward, he was just trying to do what was best and spare as many lives as he could.

I no longer know how the future will play out. Will I marry Edward? Will Renesemee ever exist? The thought of never having Renesemee sent a white hot dagger through my heart. She was my baby, I loved her more than anything in the entire world and she didn't even exist yet!

I thought about what I had to go through in order to have Renesemee: Edward leaving, the pain, Victoria, the new borns. It was all worth it. But now I might never have her.

I sat on my bed and thought for a long time. The things I said the Leah were all true and I hope she listened to me. I know the pain she is going through and I know why. But I also know she will get over it.

While I was thinking, I heard Leah's quiet heartbroken sobs. Everyone else was asleep so, silently, I got out of bed and walked towards Leah's room. I knocked and then entered, I didn't say anything, I knew that she wouldn't want me to say anything, so I just lay down beside her. I was a silent witness to her tears.