[Disclaimer: I do not claim to own all seasons of both "My Hero Academia" and "My Teen Romantic Comedy SNAFU"]
Chapter 2
[Prelude]
It was Saturday, and the inevitable first day of high school arrived on this date.
It was invariably one of the main driving factors to the verdict of your reputation. Much like Middle School and Elementary where your daunting status in the school body is inevitably determined during the first day.
My former experiences themselves contain the plausibility to candidly confirm this realistic claim.
However, since I indeed am a non-culpable and responsible student, I unequivocally decided to impeccably arrive at the school campus quite untimely and prematurely as my internal body clock had previously, and always provided.
Wait, did I just monologue?
"Yukino-sama," our family butler asks, garnering my attention. He was seated beside our driver out at the front seat whilst I sat at the back of our limousine. "We are arriving at UA High in a few more minutes."
A few more minutes? I see.
"Very well, Hiraku-san," I replied, accustomed to displaying respect in front of them.
Hiraku-san is of average height. A pale person who wore wire-framed glasses. He had chestnut brown hair and wore a black tuxedo—the usual servant uniform of our manor.
Back on the subject of education, I suppose I should prepare now.
I placed my school bag firmly on the seat beside me as I motioned my body towards the window. The soft cushions of my seat were unsurprisingly pleasant and comfortable. My feet were dragged along the carpets with a small scratch sound as I moved.
I had preferred to at least have been situated in a private classroom in lieu of being included in Class 1-A. I did not particularly esteem socializing at all, principally now that I have closely studied nearly all of my current classmates.
If they appeared to be even remotely close to what their student files had mentioned, then I was obviously in some deep inconvenience, especially since I had also taken note of the seating arrangements.
Perhaps I should—!
HONKKKKKK
Our vehicle suddenly began to halt at extreme speeds, but not enough to fully stop.
I couldn't help but be disappointed in myself. Despite being in a school zone, our vehicle was moving at inappropriate speeds. Why did I rely on others to see for their own mistakes? I should've been wary of our condition instead of mindlessly gazing at the sakura trees from the sidewalks.
From the front window, I could see a faint silhouette of a peach-haired girl with expanding eyes (mostly on the account of shock) alongside a dog getting loose down the road with a loud audible bark that even reached the compounds of our car. Then, as my astounding brain's gears began clicking, I realized something.
We were going to ram this girl's dog.
I… hated dogs. I disliked them. They were far too lively and energetic. Furthermore, all my previous interactions with them were quite an unpleasant experience. However, it outclasses the experience of seeing the dejected expression on the owner's face as she peers onto the lifeless corpse of her seemingly brown dachshund. And it was all due to my ignorance.
Therefore, if all goes south, the only choice left is to compromise.
Using my Quirk was out of my options, mostly due to the fact that Quirk usage was prohibited to those who do not have the license here in Japan. But… even if I abhorred dogs, dogs still had this precious thing we call life. A life that I wanted to save, even if I had broken the law. And saving valued lives is a valid reason for the infraction.
I opened the window quickly, hoping that I was fast enough. The cold water around my right arm began flowing throughout my palm like ketchup being poured onto a meal of breakfast in a glorious pattern. The cool sensation and my soothing expression became visible, as I prepared to unleash my—
BUMP
½ Months After the Previous Chapter
5:48 AM
The Early Bird Catches the Worm.
That was the saying that began a few centuries back whenever you arrive early at a certain occasion.
Miraculously, that very saying is still used nowadays.
We conclude that worms begin popping out of the ground quite early in the morning. The birds—who usually eat worms, are the ones in charge of hunting them and feeding off of them. The idiomatic expression has the 'bird' as a metaphor for us 'humans', and the 'worm' as a metaphor for 'opportunities'. Therefore, we 'birds' are inclined and able to grab every opportunity available whenever we arrive at a certain occasion early.
And so, I came to a conclusion: being early is a very good first impression.
Unlike those crappy and overused anime tropes where the main shoujo protagonists often come to class late, I decided to do the exact opposite and arrive early. This, of course, gives me the advantage over those other protagonists. Hachiman - 1 : Random Anime Protagonist - 0.
So, why do you think I'm aiming to arrive at my class extremely early, anyway?
Well, you see, being early serves as a characteristic for your statistics—helping uplift the opinions set out for you. With my already somewhat deteriorating facial appearance (according to the normies I've previously conversed with), the rest of my features regarding my physical aspects are well proportioned.
What I'm attempting to say is that the first impression on me would be bad if not catered with an external property.
So, I decided to be early.
You see, first impressions are extremely crucial to what people think about you. They can create and provide as well as diminish and destroy opportunities.
This was the harsh reality that I discovered during my completely horrible experience back in middle school.
Flashback
Young Hikigaya Hachiman, who was obviously me, ran cursorily through the halls. My shoes strode loudly and my arms swayed steadily. It was 8:33 in the morning, and I was several minutes late from the beginning of my classes in my first year of Middle School. Once I had arrived at my homeroom, I quickly held the soft and stainless steel handle of the door as I sweated profusely in fatigue. As I slid it open with a rattle, I was greeted with the angry expression of my teacher and the violent laughter of my classmates.
From then on, my life as a loner continued. Obviously, I was already a loner—but the reputation at that school, in particular, began after that.
It was the date I had almost begun to change (or truly learn) wholeheartedly.
End Of Flashback
I shuddered as I remembered that flashback.
So, back on the subject, First Impressions are indeed critical to what people think about you. Did you know that it only takes a person 20 seconds to formulate an opinion about you at first sight—whether it is bad or not?
This is why you should be as presentable as you can be on your very first arrival. That way, you can start consistently maintaining the good reputation you have amassed.
There's this online and possibly scientific concept I've heard about. It was called: "the primacy effect". It's when people remember things about you more during the first time you've met them rather than all your following moments.
Apart from what your Quirk is, I'd say that this is one of your big chances of creating a good and public reputation.
Let's take this for instance:
You have a childhood friend. Initially, you met a few years back. When you look back nostalgically at each others' experiences, you often remember how you first met and what your first impressions are.
That's what you call the 'primacy effect'.
And that's why first impressions and being early is necessary.
.
.
.
Okay, that's enough rambling.
The real reason I am here very early is that I didn't even get to sleep last night. I didn't even care if I got a friend or not today. Advocating my equality is my principle. It's just that I don't want to be particularly close with anyone. Thus, I chose to hate everyone instead. That's why I'm not really here to tamper with my reputation—considering I even have one in this new school in the first place.
Wait, new school?
Ah yes. How could I forget?
New school, new relationships.
A complete reset.
I was too excited, tossing and turning at every second in the bed last night. Huh, I guess even a loner like me can feel such emotions despite valuing logic over it, huh? Come to think of it, this may very well be the first time I even AM excited in my life after so many years. This isn't even the first time I'm arriving early, too. My current actions aren't necessarily unorthodox alongside my natural body clocking whenever I wake up.
So, I was walking down the halls of UA, searching for my classroom. It was very early in the morning right now, and I really don't know what I am currently doing here, but hey! The guards allowed me to enter regardless. And by guards, I mean the advanced artificially intelligent technology of UA High.
Of course, they had to check my ID to prove that I was a student and had to run checks on me for like, 2 minutes despite my injury because, apparently, I looked like one of those drug dealers on those college campuses selling not only illegal substances but also some guns that could be used for small convenience store heists.
Oh yeah, speaking of injuries...
I was actually slightly limping—especially because of the experience this morning.
Did I forget to tell you what had occurred?
Let me reminisce about it for you since it occurred literally just some time this morning.
Flashback
Ah yes, the cold winds of the early morning. Very cold, but I didn't wear my jacket. It would probably get a bit hotter later on due to this month's season, anyways. What I was wearing was my unbuttoned school coat alongside my white collared dress shirt whose collar is unkempt. I didn't even wear my tie! That just displays how much freedom I have.
So, I was riding on my bike, doing my usual stuff (like internally roasting society) as my bag was legibly placed on my bike's front basket.
My GPS pointed me to this road in particular. Since I'm not that good at navigating in unfamiliar locations, especially here in Musutafu City, I decided to download one. Being away from my hometown really was a different experience for a glorious shut-in such as I, but I'm an independent teen now! Can't say I don't like it.
When I was nearing an intersection point down in the road, I was happily thinking of some cynical internal monologue wherein I complained about the true effects of intersection points in the asphalt roads and how society had destined it to be this way. The lights turned green, and I supposed it was time for me to move once more—
"S-Sable!"
Huh?
I was about to complain to myself because my ears were quite sensitive and about how someone would be screaming so loud this morning, but, unfortunately, something else came up. Instantaneously, I flicked my gaze to the source of the sound. I saw a light brown dog-thing freely running on the zebra crossing down the asphalt street.
Wait. It had just rained a few hours ago. The road was made of slippery old asphalt. Not just any asphalt, but because of the rain, the road is also wet. That means, that...
HONKKKKKK
Crap! The road material won't likely help with the brakes!
Speeding from the corner of my eye, a black limousine was honking their car horns as the audible sound of the vehicle's brakes was attempting to stop the fast car.
In the midst of a moment, I felt as if every functioning logical brain cell I had left had come to a halt.
I wasn't even able to think. My body began moving on its own.
My thoughts were clouded with only two instinctive reactions.
Analyze the situation, and save the dog.
Internally, I cursed my own infirmity. Quirk usage was definitely out of option. While [Limitless] is perfectly suited for this, my current condition cannot utilize it. After all, the user must be relaxed in order to even activate the Quirk. I am panicking, so not only can I not observe the infinity to manipulate, I also cannot control it.
So, I used what seemed to be, in my perspective, inhuman speed, and pedaled my bike like there was no tomorrow near the scene where the accident would happen. Then, I jumped out of it in time, landing softly in front of the curious dog whose head was tilting in confusion and whom I firmly covered protecti—
BUMP
"Arh!"
Look, my pain tolerance is very high, but getting hit by a car that was driving at ludicrous speeds ON THE ROAD, and UNDER SCHOOL ZONE, still hurts nonetheless. After all, I'm human, aren't I?
"A-ah! S-Sable!"
The wiggling dog located on my chest barked, then ran to its stupidly irresponsible owner as fast as it could, wagging its tail like nothing happened.
Ah, crap. I better get up. The last thing I'd want is to get pitied for this injury. It still hurts, but I don't care.
I heard the limousine's car door open. The man—who seemed to be the driver, stood in front of me and bowed repeatedly.
"Gomen-nasai! Gomen-nasai!"
"Urk… " I made a small grumble as the pain began subsiding at high speeds, urging myself up, then dusting my clothes. "It's nothing. Now, if you excuse me, I'll be going ahead," I nonchalantly replied, ignoring their voices since my nerves were partly and temporarily disabled.
I attempted to conceal my harmed frame, but it was difficult. Due to the accident, my vision and limping body were moving wobbly.
I made it to my bike, grabbed it, then ignored the people as I began and continued pedaling—albeit slowly. Because of my distinct edginess in acting cool, I recklessly took off as if I was Kaneki Ken [1] with a fully regenerated left leg and moved as fast as I could.
When I reached another traffic post, there were only two vehicles on the road. The same black vehicle from earlier—which seems to be heading the same direction as me—and my silver and mildly scratched bike. I was thankful that there weren't many vehicles, actually. I guess going to school early in the morning was a good decision. It saves me the disgust of being present in a high traffic area.
As I waited for the red light countdown to finish, I curiously and subconsciously stared at the window of the limousine—which happened to be the latest and most expensive Rolls-Royce limousine (what the hell) and was directly parallel to me.
Then, I saw a pair of icy blue endearing eyes, staring at me with mild curiosity.
End Of Flashback
Curse you, society! This is all your fault! Why didn't you develop new road materials?! It has seriously been a few centuries already!
Currently, I am slightly recovering. I took myself to the infirmary, especially since I really did need to. My injury may affect me later during classes when I require full health the most. After all, not everyone is like All Might. I felt fine already, and a bit of rest should make me just fine. Getting hit by a car and just shrugging it off is insanely difficult. I even had to limp my way a few blocks away from school since even pedaling made my body squirm in pain once the adrenaline subsided.
Still limping, I continued on my walk.
Underneath my pants, I had my bandaged left leg. Honestly, at least it wasn't my dominant one. This school's nurse—Recovery Girl—had healed my left leg. I was actually surprised that there was even at least some staff this early in the morning. My leg wasn't completely healed, per se, since I asked her to at least heal it until the wounds were closed so that I wouldn't harm myself if I ran. Because, if I let her fully heal it, then I would've lost so much stamina that I'd probably pass out by just walking.
This was a hero school, and from what I've read in the acceptance letter, UA did not follow the usual school protocols. I have to be prepared for whatever strikes.
I was in a hall area facing the outside open air. The walls to the right of this hall from where I am facing have been designed as fences—allowing us students to observe the breath-taking view of the city, and the nice and humid winds that swayed the ahoge laying atop my hair. Daylight still hasn't shined as the darkness of early morning fell to my sight.
I sighed, as I saw the faint label of Class 1A lighting up in the distance.
Oh well, at least a good thing came out of today. After a few minutes of repeatedly getting lost and going in circles, I had finally made it. Unfortunately, I'm not great at navigating unfamiliar locations. And, oh? The lights were on. I could see the illumination coming from the closed sliding door.
Was it possible that I was not the first person inside?
Taking into account that the rest of the classrooms on the campus have their lights off, this was the safest guess.
Stopping directly in front of the humongous door, I took in a deep sigh.
"Yosh, it's time for my first impression."
I know there's already someone inside. It was also possible that someone just forgot to close the lights yesterday, but, I doubt that the school personnel is that dumb. This was UA, after all.
First, before I even entered the room, I checked to the side of the door to see the seating arrangements. It appeared that I had… seat number 16. And… I was at the… FRONT?! What?! No way! This is terrible! What kind of torment is this?! How could a loner like me somehow sit at the very front?! In front of the teacher's table, no less! So, I had seat number 16—and I was located at the seat nearest to the teacher's table, and furthest from the front door in terms of one straight line. While I may have the fabled anime protagonist seat, this meant that I still had to walk at the very front in front of many other people who could possibly be looking at me.
Well, there's no use crying over spilt milk. The egg you broke won't come back. The plates you've shattered in your kitchen won't magically repaste themselves. All the horses and soldiers of a king will never return to his side again. What's done is done.
I clutched my bag as I steeled myself.
Whilst putting my right hand on the handle of the sliding door, I closed my eyes in utter preparation.
Then, I opened the door.
SLIDE
With my eyes closed, I entered the chilly room. I could tell from a single feel that there is indeed air conditioning here. However, it was a thermostat, that I perceived, present. My senses told me that there was indeed conflict within the atmosphere. The heat, fighting off the cool. After all, it was still a bit cold during the morning here in Japan… or there could be someone who's producing this low temperature...
I sighed, then opened my eyes.
I was still looking at the entrance of the classroom, hands clutched on the handles. Then, I closed the door tightly with the rattling sounds of the door sliding entering my sensitive ears. Afterward, I heard a faint rustling of paper from behind me. Was someone turning a book?
Hm. Someone is definitely inside here.
After that, I turned around.
Then, onyx gray eyes met icy blue ones.
And...
It was… fascinating.
A girl, seemingly of my age, was elegantly sitting at the seat directly beside the seat nearest to the window; her raven black hair, seemingly smooth as silk, accentuated by two crimson red ribbons; her feet were gracefully plopped onto the ground; her extraordinarily winsome face, white as if she were a porcelain doll; her exotic crystal-like eyes, ever-so captivating and exquisite as if it were made of diamonds; her body, lithe, and perfectly proportionate, as if she were literally Aphrodite. She was… so pulchritudinous. It was as if UA's capital value increased tenfold due to her stepping into the property alone.
She looked a tiny bit shocked, too. It appears that she wasn't expecting anybody to come to school this early in the morning.
But her blue orbs which stared cautiously at mine all felt so familiar as I recalled the faint blue ones staring at me with curiosity from earlier.
It was… familiar.
Flashback
I looked at the eyes of the girl inside the limousine that had just run me over. She was giving me a curious glance. Her blue eyes met my gray ones, but the eye contact broke immediately as I frantically began looking in other directions.
End Of Flashback
Whilst feigning her stare, I did not speak.
Why, you ask?
The answer was pretty simple.
I had zero communication skills. Emphasis on 'zero'. If she was the girl from earlier, which I'm inclined to believe, then I really hold no grudge, considering that she was in the back seat despite her driver hitting me like a rhinoceros headbutting a tree at full speed. Or, it could just be a look-alike, since there are about 130 million people here in Japan...
With my heart pounding in anxiety, I just continued walking while my brain began exhibiting an existential crisis. As I walked closer to where she was currently located, though, I realized that it was getting a bit colder. Was she possibly regulating the temperature around her passively? Then it must be that type of Quirk, then. Wait a second. Why was she located there? No way… sHE'S SEATED BESIDE ME?! WHAT KIND OF CALUMNIOUS PREDICAMENT IS THIS?! IS THIS SOME FORM OF ROM COM DEVELOPMENT?! No, it can't be!
Afterward, I just accepted my fate and sat down on seat #16. Apparently, her gaze was still fixated on me. Feeling confused, I decided to confront her by staring back.
...
After a while, she closed her eyes then sighed, opened them, then continued what seems to be what you call: 'reading her own book'.
My name is Hikigaya Hachiman.
And if you did not know, girls are my sworn enemies.
And… this situation… made me remember a faint bitter-sweet memory.
Flashback
Here in my 2nd year of Middle School, I was forced to be seated beside a girl.
"Oh, Hikigaya-san?" she asks.
Why was she talking to me? Wait, does she want to be involved with me?!
"O-oh, hi!" I replied, immediately stuttering. "D-do you want to be friends?! W-wait, let's go out on a date!"
Okay, Hachiman, you can do this! You survived the 1st year, and so, even if many people disgust you, you can still make some friends and most possibly, a girlfriend! That's why you should be really straightforward and ask straight away!
The girl in front of me was smiling before it turned into a neutral, sickened expression.
"Huh? No! You're really creepy! You know what? Forget I even tried to start a conversation!"
End Of Flashback
Besides, I wouldn't want to risk the possibility of me getting attracted to her. The chances of that are very slim. And to avoid rejection or something, I had to act now.
The fastest way to avoid that from ever happening again is to make her hate me.
So in lieu of a pleasant greeting, I did the next best thing.
Intimidation.
"Grrrrr… "
Like a powerful and predatory lion on top of a kingly mountain, I growled, attempting to scare her away. Yes, yes, yes! Get scared of me you stupid—Eek!
The girl before me averted her agile eyes to mine as she glared with such intensity I'd thought the world was finally going to end by turning into an ice cube. It was so freezingly scary that bit by bit, I thought my arms and feet were beginning to debilitate out of hypothermia. I shot her a helpless glance as I was taken aback by her predatory glare and signaled a retreat. But that expression was cut short since a prideful loner such as I began imperiously glaring back.
After a while, we gave up and went to do our own thing.
From the corners of my eyes, I could see her smooth raven-black curtain of hair. She was easily the prettiest person I have seen in my life—no use denying that since I'm betting that nobody else could ever read my thoughts. After all, nobody in the world had discovered a person with a mind-reading Quirk just yet. Still, though, it made me question myself… Why did she appear to use a stoic expression?
I focused my attention on my bag as I brought out my light novel which I was currently invested in reading. Before that, though, I brought out my phone and checked the time.
… 5:53 AM. It had barely been a few minutes. Dang.
And we're supposed to sit here until another person enters the room?
Tough luck, because that sounds like it would happen in a miracle. It is quite rare that someone like her is this early in the morning, present. And so, I decided to become real with myself and conclude that the next person would be coming in about 2 hours, or so.
...
Maybe I should at least introduce myself?
Hmm.
I do not know how to talk to other people—much less do I know how to talk with women. The last female I talked to was my little sister, Komachi—which was two days ago when she visited me on Saturday. Speaking of my dear imouto… She was probably still asleep right now at the Hikigaya household back in Chiba. Back to the subject, I am plenty sure that aside from my sister and mother, all girls are interested only in hot guys and engage in indecent relations with men. They are my sworn enemies.
So, after slouching my back in comfort, I brought out a light novel and continued staring dumbfoundedly at its cover, not even bothering to open it.
Maybe I should tell her my name?
I mean, if I am in a hero school, chances are that we would either have to fight with each other or fight each other one day in the long run. I guess I have to set myself up straight. I didn't memorize the student list outside our room, so I don't know her name.
Thus, I looked at her.
Then, my mouth began to open.
"My name is Hi— "
"Don't bother, I am already aware," she says, cutting me off with her angelic voice. Talk about rude, though! "My name is Yukinoshita Yukino."
Yukinoshita Yukino, huh? "... okay."
.
.
.
Wait.
Yukinoshita?
THE Yukinoshita?
The most famous, and the richest family here in Japan, possibly the whole world, with the head of the family as the deputy prime minister?! Oh crap. I was talking to what is probably the DAUGHTER of the deputy prime minister! But… there's still this possibility that they just had the same name. Although that seemed quite unlikely. When I was approaching her earlier, I could bet that the temperature was slightly dropping. Another thing was that the Yukinoshita family was known all over the world for the most enhanced ice casting abilities. And haven't I heard her name on television that one time? Yeah, that one time I actually decided to watch television regarding something unrelated to the news. Was she a celebrity? Maybe that's why she felt so familiar...
I won't really let her reputation change my perceptions, so I just remained as cautious as ever.
From her tone of voice, Ms. Prim and Proper here was quite the feature of an 'untouchable princess' and society's idea of unethicality. She was outright rude, and therefore, did not care about how others perceived her. She's a Yukinoshita. Seemingly a rich heiress, bound to have plentiful connections and relations. Therefore, if she came here alone, it was probable that she preferred to remain outside social interactions. That means that their household isn't as one perceives it to naturally be. I'm already guessing the possible tropes: evil mother; nice, always-buying-milk-at-the-nearby-convenience-store father; haughty sibling, etc. I'm guessing that from the stoic expression from her prepossessing face, that she had family problems—since it was usually the case in anime. Therefore, she could possibly be a secret assassin hired by government officials to execute me—
THUD
She closed her book elegantly, her smooth fingers gripping the border of her book, then looked at me with her crystal-like eyes in return. Woah, why does she look as if I just groped her?
"Perverted-Creep-kun, please refrain from staring at me with those rotten eyes of yours," she began, then aimed the front of her body in a different direction whilst protectively holding her left hand to her chest. "I am beginning to fear for my chastity."
What the hell? Why are you calling me Perverted-Creep-kun?!
I rolled my eyes. She even talks like a rich girl. Talk about melodramatic. Then, I averted my gaze. The fact that she says she knows my name makes sense, as well. She's probably as well dedicated as her family name suggests. In politics, one must be aware of their possible competitors. That includes perpetually stalking others to secure a spot above the other—or at least that's how it went in some of the light novels I've read. In response to her complaint, I narrowed my eyes sharply whilst I let my droplet of sweat drip across my forehead.
"I am not even looking at you, especially not at that ever-so-modest chest of yours. And, I don't particularly find anything inherently wrong regarding my perfectly-shaped irises." I look back at her to see her narrowing her eyes accusatively. Not feeling too satisfied with her reaction, I decided to back my statement up. "H-hey, I'm being honest here…"
She smirked.
"So you were looking."
Hey, didn't I just deny that before? I narrowed my eyes in a curious gaze. My eyebrows remained raised to display my apathy and unstirred condition.
"Please care to elaborate?"
"The fact that you complimented the size of my chest is evidence enough to suggest that you were indeed looking."
Gulp. "And who told you that was a compliment?"
She sighed, "The fact that you called it 'modest'.".
"As far as I know, the word: 'modest' becomes a compliment depending on which situation it's applied to."
"So, you intended to insult me but ended up complimenting me instead. How pitiful."
"And how did my comment even become a compliment? Are you sure it wasn't just your lack of common sense?"
She sighed, and looked at me with a face that said: 'really?'
"Modesty is the quality of being moderate in the estimation of one's—such as mine's—physical or superficial aspects. It also contains another definition—which recommends 'being okay with less than what I deserve.'"
What do you mean? And, is she a freaking dictionary or something? And, where is her source? How can I be sure that she didn't just make that up?
Once she had caught sight of my confused expression, she shook her head before responding.
"It appears that you are unable to comprehend my high vocabulary. Don't worry. It was as I expected." Huh? What? I happen to be perfectly verbose, too. Your explanation just doesn't make sense! "In layman's terms, you are implying that I deserve bigger."
Oh.
"Oi! Your definition of 'modesty' was obviously idealistic. You're deluding yourself into thinking that you're fine just the way you are."
Yukinoshita remained unfazed. "How disgusting. And where's the evidence supporting your statement?"
"Heh. When people are downgraded because they look less attractive than others, they begin creating an illusion for themselves to keep their ego and self-esteem intact. Therefore, people will begin twisting the general definitions of words to support their statements. Source: Me."
"Oh? So you agree that not only are you unattractive, but you've also previously experienced a critical hit to your pride and ego that you even went as far as to create illusions to satisfy yourself? How utterly pitiful," she replied, shaking her head.
"Oi. The same could be said for you."
"Unfortunately, Hiki-opinion-kun, what I had previously stated was a hard fact. Now that I remember it once again, it's pretty amusing how your poor attempts at insulting me backfired so harshly. Now I am getting the notion that you are a sad person with seemingly no life at all, trying to blame others due to your own incompetence."
Ouch, that hurts!
"Just so you know, I happen to have a perfectly amazing life! And it's not my fault society turned out this way."
"Hmm, I suppose you're correct regarding society, however, your mere existence may drastically worsen the situation of society even more, quite so."
"Huh?! What do you mean I'd worsen the state of society? My existence alone deviates from living alongside those disgusting normies!"
"Hikigaya-kun, the term: 'normies' are extremely out of date. According to my studies, that word alone only peaked during the 2010's Heisei Era. Honestly, you're so weird that society may even break apart due to your eyes alone."
"What do you mean? The term: 'normies' are still collectively used throughout this date. Also, what the hell is with that last statement?! That's exceedingly false! Society won't break due to my eyes!"
"Despite how disgusting society is to this date, I can't help but notice how you, a disgusting creature, are somehow far worse than that of society itself."
"What? I'm no revolting creature!"
She mock-coughed to her left knuckle. "My apologies, it appears I was wrong."
Hm? Well, if she's apologizing then I suppose that's fin—
"I meant that you are a gross, revolting insectoid, reeking of inferiority and stomach-churning ideals that can possibly bring this whole world apart."
"What?! What even makes you say such a doltish thing?!"
"Your existence alone speaks for itself, Hikigaya-kun," she smirked, smugly looking at my eyes. "I believe I have mentioned that before."
"What did I even do to you?!"
"You tried to insult me, but you ended up insulting yourself, considering you weren't even an insult to humanity in the first place."
How the hell does she get these retorts?!
"W-well, whatever that was, I didn't mean it," I spoke, attempting to quickly disarm the situation. "So just forget about it."
"The die has been cast, Perverted-Creep-kun."
"W-whatever…" I replied, averting my gaze instantly. "And, I have a name, you know?"
I look at her from my peripheral vision to see her in a pondering stance.
"Speaking of which, Hikigaya-kun, some of the information I've retrieved about you seemed very inaccurate." So she knows how to say my name. She brings out a sheet of paper with what seems to be my data or something. Definitely part of the top 10 stalkers in the world. "It says here that you have the Quirk: [Limitless]. However, it appears that your Quirk isn't what it seems. This sheet explains that your Quirk is somehow quite versatile; however, it doesn't make any sense. I can't help but be suspicious of it."
Huh? Suspicious? Snatching the sheet of paper out of her hands, I began reading the written information. While viable in figuring out a person's biography, so far, it was most definitely misleading. And… huh… my Quirk is supposed to be weaker. Were they so pitiful that they didn't even bother updating it? Maybe they never bothered to look at the updated information in the first place.
"It looks like the staff members at my school have written a lot of fraudulent or forged data about me."
"On which part, specifically?"
Sigh, "Nearly all of them. Even my Quirk details..."
Yukinoshita looked taken aback, then shook her head.
"I can't say I agree with you. Their observations regarding your personality were definitely spot on."
What? Spot on? I checked the part of the sheet of paper I've yet to uncover and read under the Personality tab: 'Hikigaya Hachiman. He disturbs the class peace intentionally due to the fact that he was rejected for the umpteenth time during his 3rd Year of Middle School. Be aware of him. He is extremely perverse, and will do anything to get you onto his bed-'
I stopped reading instantly.
What. the. actual. fuck.
Is it even legal to write that bullshit in my student file?!
I then heard some muffled giggling. I turned to look at the culprit as Yukinoshita Yukino—a person who I've just met—was currently laughing whilst covering her mouth femininely with the rest of her sheets of paper.
"Sh-shut up... "
My cheeks were slightly flushed in embarrassment. How dare the teachers talk like that about me!
"My, my, Hiki-pervert-kun."
"Shut it, Ice-Queen-san."
She offered another complacent smirk, "That's rich, coming from the Unkempt-Clothing-and-Rotten-King-kun."
"H-hey… I just happen to find clothing up properly a waste of my morning time."
"Is that so? No wonder I find you extremely creepy. It's one of your natural aspects."
Oi, oi, oi! How the heck can she create insults that fast?! And, did she say that I was creepy again?! She's probably called me creepy more than thrice now! I have to seriously address this!
"Creepy? Look, I happen to be very normal, and I have no form of disabilities whatsoever!"
With a smug tone, she replied, "Please seek professional aid immediately. I fear that your brain is deluding itself into thinking that deplorability is not one of your main characteristics, Hiki-creepy-kun."
"Professional aid? I am not in any way lamentable. The fact that you are merely assuming that I'm some sort of perverted beast based on appearance alone concludes the fact that you are rather the one requiring that so-called 'professional aid' instead."
"That so? Maybe you should back-read your memories. Are you aware of the fact that I've actually been studying your personality when we were previously talking? I suppose you can't do that, though. Your mind lacks sufficient brain cells in order to even do such a thing. So that you could understand, I'll say it in a simpler way: 'I am basing my words on my observations'."
"Are you somehow confirming that you're actually interested in me? You saying that you're studying me just gives further evidence to support that statement," I replied, not willing to lose. "Other than that, you seem like a stalker."
She just smirked, "Ara, Hiki-sexual-predator-kun. Are you actually beguiling yourself into thinking that a superior being such as I will actually be interested in such a lowly peasant such as you? Please stop with your impossible fantasies. It was all but a precaution."
A sexual predator?! What the hell?! Where did that come from?!
"Oi! I'm not some weird sexual predator. Besides, people in the thrones are bound to fall one day. It will only take a matter of time and then you'll disappear."
Her smug look did not waver, "You're correct. You're not a weird sexual predator. You're a licentious sexual predator incapable of resisting his urges. And to your latter statement, people in the thrones such as I will produce historical events inscribed into books, taking quite a lot of time before disappearing. A lowly peasant such as yourself will take less than a day to cease on their visibility, considering there's even a possibility of you being visible in the first place."
"Where the hell did licentious come from?! Also, like a pawn in a chessboard, I can take the Queen out. No matter how highly you think of yourself, there is still a possibility."
"A possibility close to nothing. With a person like yourself who obviously does not have any friends, with which army do you possibly plan on utilizing to somehow miraculously defeat me?"
U-uh...
"That's bold of you to assume that you even have any friends in the first place."
"Believe me, I do. You trying to contradict my statistics and not my claim against yours just furthers the evidence that I am a superior person."
Dang!
Think, think, think!
"Hoh? Has your mouth finally run out of that awful, stinky gas, Hiki-nothing-to-say-kun? Did you even brush your teeth?"
"... for your information, I did brush my teeth..."
Taking my quiet response as a victory, she just smirked triumphantly at me right after, before nodding—signaling to end our conversation, which I myself was slightly thankful of. She turned back to reading her book, as I did the same.
Honestly, who does she think she is? I just met her and she's already insulting me as if there was no tomorrow.
But even so, this newfound silence between us had felt more comfortable than ever.
Well, I suppose I should stop thinking about that. Filling my mind with her unnecessary existence would be a disgrace to my loner status. I could only come as far as observing her momentarily.
Desperate to distract me of my thoughts, I then looked at a random paragraph in my book then began reading. The passage says as follows:
'... The captivating beauty of her long curtain of silky black hair was graciously swinging through the windy atmosphere. Her captivating blue orbs looked at me in tranquility. I smiled as I returned the stare. The few seconds we shared felt like hours as we spoke in silence. For I am only a mere peasant at the presence of the beloved Ice Queen—'
As I read that passage, I instantaneously shut the book I was reading with flushed cheeks.
My thoughts were cut off at the immediate presence of a gaze. I looked beside me to see Yukinoshita staring at me. When we shared eye contact, I broke away instantly, averting my gaze back to the cover of the closed light novel. To my side, I could still feel her questioning glare.
A few seconds passed and I began hearing the audible noise of a book flipping. It appears that her attention had returned back to her novel. Well, who cares about that snobby bitch anyways? Freaking Ice Witch.
But then…
SQUEAK
The sounds of a distorted microphone—or is that a mouse squeaking? Wait, what?
As the awkward tension building up in the atmosphere dissipated, Yukinoshita and I both looked at each other before looking at the speakers stationed at the middle part of our classroom on the wall of the doorway.
"What was that?" she asked,
"I don't—"
"Ah, good morning, students! I assure you, that it was not a mouse squeaking that you have just heard!"
Recognition filling her crystal oceans for eyes, she spoke, "That sounds like…"
"That's correct, Yukinoshita-san!"
Hey, is it just me or can he hear the both of us? Wait a second… Are there any spy devices inside this room?! I quickly peered around the classroom. Actually, why am I even doubting that?! This is UA, after all. All sorts of crazy MUST have happened around here at some point in time.
"Oi, Ice Cold Princess." Yukinoshita's gaze flicked to me in mild curiosity, quite unbothered by the new nickname I gave her. "Do you know who the person in the speakers is?"
"That is Principal Nezu. He is UA's Principal and is considered to be one of the most chaotic people worldwide," she answers solemnly, her elegant face instilling a pondering expression. "Frankly, I don't know what plans he has right now."
I nodded in agreement. I've heard of his name quite a lot. I'm pretty sure he makes the news whenever he wants to.
So, he's the principal, huh?
"Well, Yukinoshita-san, could you please accompany Hikigaya-kun to my office? I am requesting for the presence of the both of you," the principal said, on the speaker.
Hmm. What could he supposedly want with us? Is he planning to do an experiment? Wait, does he possibly want to dissect me?! I know my nickname used to be Hiki-froggy back in 2nd grade, but isn't this taking it a bit too far?!
"Very well, Principal."
Yukinoshita nodded once more, then she stood up and looked at me. As I stared back, her face began morphing into something of displaying annoyance.
"What?"
"I am pretty sure you heard him; unless the infection of your rotting eyes had spread to your ears, Hikigerma-kun?"
What the hell?! How did she know of that nickname?! That was the nickname I got in my 1st Year of Elementary after two week's worth of being bedridden in a hospital!
"Oi, did you just call me a germ?!"
She looked at me questioningly as if she never knew what she said, "Pardon?"
"You just called me a germ just now!"
Smirking, she continued, "I think your ears had sustained some damage, Hikigaya-cootie."
O-oi!
"You just called me a germ again!"
This makes me remember my sad childhood once more…
Flashback
"Look, stay away from the weak kid! He's filled with germs!" a kid said, spouting nonsense to his 'friend'.
"Hahaha! Isn't his name Hiki-germa or something?"
"Hahahahaha! Hiki-germa! Keep calling him that, it fits him so well being so alone and miserable, imagine trying to be him?! HAHAHAHAHA!"
I looked at them with a pained expression. But there was nothing that I could do, right?
End Of Flashback
Oh yeah, have I told you that that nickname, in particular, was used by my old teachers to threaten kids into behaving? 'Sit properly or else you'll catch the Hiki-germs!'
Yukinoshita glares at me again—snapping me out of my thoughts.
But, "Do I really have to go?"
My voice reeked of exasperation, but her adorbs eye roll served more indignation.
I sighed, putting my light novel inside my bag whilst placing it firmly under my desk as I stood up as well.
Whilst we were both walking to the door of our classroom to exit, I can't help but notice the cold temperature emanating from her. If my knowledge about the Yukinoshita family holds true, then she really does have an Ice-related Quirk. Or just something related to manipulating the temperature decreasingly.
Temperature manipulation Quirks… well, I have a theory. Personally, I think that she should be able to notice the sudden shifts in temperature whenever I am attempting to move in such close proximity to her. It's basically like having eyesight from every angle of your body—it's just that the temperature change is what the user utilizes to derive the motions of the person near you. It works like echolocation. A club member from a ghost-hunting school club could explain it as some form of sixth sense.
"I suppose you don't know the way to the office yet?"
"I don't."
"I see. Then, just follow me."
I responded by nodding. Alright, that's simple enough.
-o-o-o-o-o-
Whilst walking our way to the Principal's office, I can't help but take note of her hair flowing softly through the winds. It was like in the passage I had read earlier. I took some time to think about what I was feeling, and it's definitely not what I initially thought. I was not attracted to her. I mean, the gloomy and cynical Hikigaya Hachiman, possibly attracted? Ha. If it was me from before, then I would see why I had the possibility to even fall for someone, since I was actually desperate for any form of attention or relationship. But, I'm not the same person anymore. Thinking back on that, I felt how stupid that was of me. It was so cringey that I might as well have died like how Dolph did [2]. Anyways, it's pretty impossible for me to fall romantically attracted now. I suppose you could call me aromantic, but I had lost hope in romance ever since those failed attempts at confessing to girls during middle school. So to conclude, I realized that I hated Yukinoshita Yukino. I have plenty of reasons why, but another big factor was because every time she would peer from behind her, she was looking at me as if I were truly a sexual predator prepared to strike.
I averted my gaze to the dark view of the city to my right while the other source of cold air remained on my left. It was the same view I saw when I was walking here from the opposite side, going to our classroom a few minutes earlier after taking a visit to the infirmary. But now that I think about it, the sky wasn't as dark as it was before. I could see the slow yet steady increase in the illumination. It's most likely that the sun had done its part of tampering. It would only take several minutes to an hour for the sun to finally shine down on us.
If I were, to be honest, I'd say that I prefer night over day. I feel comfort in the dark—not that I'm trying to sound like some odd and edgy demon [3] or something.
Out of nowhere, Yukinoshita spoke, snapping me back to reality. "Hikigaya-kun."
Was this the 15th time she'd daze me out of my thoughts this day? I could see her gazing at me from her peripheral vision as we continued on our walk to the principal's office.
"Mm?"
"I recall asking you earlier regarding your Quirk. The sheet of paper informed me that your Quirk is [Limitless], But I don't necessarily get how it works, especially since while it sounds so great, your seemingly unlimited ability written in your student file deviates from that of the limited ability you displayed during the Entrance Exams."
Oh, this question. It was the one that she initially asked me.
"Well, you see… the truth is… the Quirk status you saw in my student file isn't up to date and has fewer drawbacks than what it truly has. As far as I know, my Quirk is still weak—considering the fact that I trained with it during some of my free time."
"Oh… That so?" she responded, now looking back forward.
"Mm," I hummed a response.
That's it. I'm having a mild crisis right now. Who the hell is she?! She could still be a secret government assassin waiting for the opportune moment to strike and kill me! I think she was definitely asking about my Quirk so she could secretly plot my death. Maybe even this school's principal is involved in this whole fiasco... Perhaps both are planning to execute me at the principal's office? Now I'm really afraid of the idea of dissection...
"Don't worry. It won't change my view on you whatsoever." She then turns to me then smiles briefly before returning her gaze to where she was looking earlier. "You're still disgusting and creepy. Nothing changes that."
Stupid demon superwoman! Stop calling me disgusting and creepy! I am certainly not! And who the hell said I was worried about how you viewed me?! I know you're a secret government official, Yukinokiller-san!
Anyways, back to the subject at hand, there was this one question that has entered my mind ever since the idea of her being my secret assassin came to mind. Earlier, I meant it as a joke. However, now I can't help but be more suspicious of her...
"Oi, Yukinoshita," I called out, grabbing her attention. She looked at me from the corner of her eyes.
"Mm?"
"How did you know about my experience at the practical portion of the entrance exams?"
She glanced at me then continued peering back at the general direction she was initially looking at whilst in a pondering stance. She cupped her chin and supported her cupping arm with her other.
"Well, to put it simply, I was inside the observation room during that time."
Oh, that made sense. I'm relieved. I was under the impression that I was under the government watch-list. I thought she was stalking me so she could prepare plans to kill me later on. Maybe she isn't an assassin after all. I still can't be too sure...
"... that so?" I replied, watching her cautiously.
She smiled, then returned to her usual posture.
"Yes. I think you would've attained a spot higher on the leaderboard if it weren't for your laziness. Perhaps it was necessary since you were probably exhausted."
"Probably, I still had a whole lot more stamina reserves left to finish the exams. I was honestly just giving up. I never expected to pass the practical portion. I suppose one could call me lucky."
Her smile dropped, replaced by a mischievous one.
"That so? Then I must say, I am frankly disappointed that you irresponsibly wasted your opportunity. Besides, you should've taken into consideration that you've already stood out when you overwhelmed the lowest points record here in UA by about 10 points. It was certainly sad, Lowest-Points-kun."
Oh yeah, that. Wait a second, what the hell is with that insulting nickname?! Anyways, I remember breaking into nationwide news that I was one of three people who had broken a certain record in UA.
Flashback
Komachi and I, alongside Kamakura, were lazily sitting on our couch. It was the final day before I moved to the apartment my parents bought for me in Musutafu City. Initially, today was supposed to be the day I moved out on my own, but I felt so lazy and unmotivated that I didn't want them to exploit my cheap labor. Fortunately, tomorrow we had some movers with me. Right now, we were currently watching some television when a sudden news flash popped out
"Attention, citizens! It appears that our next generation of heroes is promising! We will dub it: 'The Generation of Miracles [4]'!"
Oh? What's this?
And, Generation of Miracles? Can't they be a bit more original? Gee.
"Apparently, this year's batch has points much higher than those of before!"
Wow, that's good to hear. But not really. This just means a harder challenge for me. Come on life, why?!
"Two of the participants included in the latest UA Entrance Exams have just shattered All Might's record! Two are of the most villain points scored, and a third who managed to wiggle through as the least points scored in UA!"
Cutely, Komachi pointed her index finger at the television screen. "Nii-chan! You made the news!"
"Yeah…"
"Unfortunately, UA did not allow the names of these young heroes to be publicized, but I can assure you that their points were really off the charts!"
I sighed in relief.
At least UA doesn't leak out any private information.
End Of Flashback
"The feeling of standing out makes me feel sick. Standing out more would probably bawl my eyes out," I joked, to which she sighed slightly. "On the other hand, since I never expected to pass, I didn't need to try harder. And how would I know if I got the lowest points already?"
"You didn't? I was under the impression that you figured out your ranking in the exams."
Smugly, I replied, "Oh? Are you thinking highly of me now?"
"Don't misunderstand. It was simply a mistake on my part. I forgot to take into account the fact that you are dumb."
Hah?
"I'm pretty sure even smart people would struggle with that. Are you in some way implying that all smart people are dumb?"
She chuckled, "Quite bold of you to assume you were part of the so-called 'smart' people. And no, I'm not implying that all smart people are dumb. The difference lies in how much of a disgusting insectoid you are."
"Oi! First off, I am not a disgusting insectoid! Secondly, I am smart! "
"I'd have to take a trip down memory lane to see where I've made the mistake of misunderstanding your character. As of now, I can confidently say that there is no evidence of the fact that you are somehow intuitive as every moment I've shared with you states your stupidity. As for being a disgusting insectoid, your existence is proof enough."
"Oi! This again, with my existence! And as for my intelligence, well, you haven't necessarily given me a chance to prove it. Not that I would, I could care less about how you perceive me to be. I'm outstanding as it is, and only I have to know that."
"I suppose so," she responded, as we continued our walk to the Principal's Office. "You are quite outstanding—in the sense that the virus you've been emitting has made you stand out more than enough."
Hah?! This again?! What's with her and her thoughts about me being affiliated with medical illnesses?!
"Please, if that was, then you would've been immediately quarantined and decontaminated. The World Health Organization would be out for you instantly."
"I believe that wouldn't fix the problem. You produce the virus, so they'll have to exterminate you."
I rolled my eyes. "... whatever."
As I heard a faint chuckle, she stopped.
Her silky black hair still swayed in utter grace since we were literally beside an open and windy space, then she turned to look at me, hands gripping the hem of her skirt. For a few seconds, I stared into those majestic blue pools of hers, before I decided to finally speak.
"What?"
"Hikigaya-kun…" suddenly, she bowed directly in front of me. "... I… am very sorry."
… nani?
"I… noticed that you were still limping, and your leg seems to not yet fully recover."
Wait… is she implying…
"I would like to apologize for doing nothing earlier. I was in the backseat when our limousine had hit you."
So, she was there.
I sighed, then signalled her up. "I honestly don't care. I hold no grudges in that accident. You didn't do anything wrong, since you weren't even the one driving the car," I replied. "So just stand up straight. Despite meeting you only for a few minutes, it feels weird to have you bowing in front of me."
Well, this was definitely a first. I have to curse myself for not bringing my phone alongside me. I could've taken a picture of her current posture and used it to blackmail her someday or something. Her bow seemed so genuine that I definitely dismissed the thought of her being a government assassin.
However, if she weren't a government assassin… then why does she even talk to me?
Is she doing this out of obligation? Is she only attentive to me because she feels responsible for hitting me? Considering her curious stare from earlier, I must say that the accident was eating up her conscience.
"... oh," she nodded, standing back up straight. Yukinoshita then used an expression that surprised me. Despite the current situation, she looked at me smugly. "Well, don't let that simple apologetic gesture get to your head. Don't think that I'll pity you for this," she said, then walking off to where we were heading earlier.
Not pity me? Huh. That was… surprising, to say the least. Sighing, I continued trailing her.
"Alright, you Ice Cold Princess."
Oh yeah, did I forget to say that I absolutely did NOT trust her at all when it came to directions? We were literally wandering for like, 20 minutes, and I'm pretty sure we've circled UA already.
-o-o-o-o-o-
Knock Knock
"Come in~!" the voice from inside called us out.
I turned to look at Yukinoshita before we entered. She… looked surprisingly fine. Perhaps she's already met the principal before? Well, I wouldn't really be surprised. Especially since she's definitely from the famous Yukinoshita family. That being said, she must have established every connection that she required already.
Another thing was that we had to install UA's GPS, as instructed by our school principal. We both kept getting lost in all directions, and dang. I've never been a bit more embarrassed than that. Why did Yukinoshita have to be bad at directions, too? Well, at least I'm better than her in that regard.
Then, a smirk formed on her face. I recoiled, gulping as she turned to look at me, too.
"As much as I know how much of a good investment it would be for you if you keep checking me out, I must say that we wouldn't want the Principal to be kept waiting."
"R-right," I replied. "Besides, I wasn't even checking you out."
"That so?"
"Yes. I was checking your expression."
She chuckled, "You know, you didn't have to create an excuse just to observe me."
Heh.
"Oh? Are you saying that you don't mind me looking at you?"
Unfortunately, instead of the expression that I was expecting, she just softly giggled.
"Are you in some ridiculous way implying that I would actually like you back? Perhaps your student file was actually producing facts."
"What, do you think I like you or something?"
Seemingly surprised, she asked, "Hm? You don't?"
"Why should I?"
"Hmm, that's weird. I thought a dying person like you should at least be cherishing every moment with me."
What? Dying person? What the hell? And no, I am not cherishing every moment with you.
"Are you stupid? I'm not even a dying person at all. Maybe you have your own set of germs, after all, Yukinoshita-cootie. It may have been infesting your brains rendering you quite stupid."
After the comment, she spluttered, before giving me a piercing glare. Her facial expression spewed all the incredulity on her mind with what I just said. So to say, I was able to discover the most priceless reaction ever.
"D-did you just… call me a germ?"
I responded with roaring laughter as she continued pouting at me with a hateful gaze with looks that could definitely kill. Despite the increasingly fast decrease in the temperature, I just couldn't help it! I gave her a taste of her own medici—
CREAKKK
Unfortunately, all good things must come to an end. When the brown and wooden (yet polished) door in front of us automatically opened, a—… an animal from inside the room appeared?
"Am I a mouse? A dog? Or a bear? It doesn't matter, I'm Principal Nezu! Although I'm guessing you two already know that!" You're not guessing! You probably heard our conversation earlier.
There was a mouse-looking mini bear—is that a chimera or something? I thought those animals never existed. Then again, we live in a world where even starfishes can talk [5]. I continued staring since the 'person' sitting on that boss chair inside the principal's room looked so familiar.
Weren't we supposed to see the Principal? Wait—oohh right! This is Principal Nezu! That's why he looked so familiar. I saw him on TV once and recall him as that one animal hero. Wasn't his Quirk [High Spec] or something? He had like, an IQ of 254, I think. Also, If I recall correctly, he aided in the Japanese Revolution against the World Government for Independence a few decades back, before I was even born. Wait, won't that mean that he's really old?
"So, here you two were! I was wondering when you two would come in, but it appears that you two were too busy shamelessly flirting with each other!"
What?! Did I hear that correctly?!
"We are not flirting!" We responded in unison.
By instinct, we gave him an intense cold glare that somehow didn't even make him flinch.
"Please, please! Spare me the cute romance you both have been developing." Then, his demeanor changed to a more serious one. "Please sit down."
The Principal had a complete 180 to his previously cheery face. Well, I'm glad to have him on our side. His mere presence is enough to make me shudder. Besides, two-faced people are scary. Anyways, the mouse-bear-dog-looking animal beckoned us to the two chairs right in front of the table as if we were students involved in a petty school fight.
The room was, as I expected, one of your usual high-end office rooms. Everything was neatly placed, the floor was made of blue carpet, the walls were littered with bookshelves filled with history books and encyclopedias that one could mistake the room for a mini-library. The chimera sat in his boss chair, the table arranged like the casual American-style principal room whenever students were summoned for consultation.
Yukinoshita and I shared the same sigh. Our expressions broke down into poker faces as we took his initiative and both sat down on the chairs. We both looked into each other's eyes once more, then trailed our gaze back to the principal who was happily pouring tea into the porcelain teacups prepared aligned to our seats.
As the aroma and steam of the tea entered my nostrils, I immediately recognized it as green tea.
There was a short moment of silence before Yukinoshita decided to break it.
"So, Principal Nezu-san, may I inquire why you had decided to summon the both of us to your office?"
The chimera just hummed a tone and nodded.
"Yes. You see, I was kind of getting bored sitting in my office alone." So boredom was the reason, then? "I was about to call upon Yukinoshita-san here until I saw Hikigaya-kun approach the gate."
Nezu took a sip of his own teacup, before nodding to himself. He returned back to his office chair as he gazed at us once more.
"You see, I myself was quite surprised with the punctuality of the both of you. I honestly expected you two to arrive alongside your classmates later on."
"Still, Principal Nezu-san, that doesn't explain why you've called for us," Yukinoshita states.
I shot the girl in front of me with a dirty look. Idiot! The principal was still probably not done talking yet! Next time, you should—Eek!
It appears that she had noticed, and replied back with a predatory glare of her own, much like earlier. I shrieked, then averted my gaze instantly. She is seriously scary! Freaking demon superwoman!
"Initially, I was supposed to call you alone, Yukinoshita-san." didn't he say this already earlier? "But then I saw the unique chemistry you have with Hikigaya-kun here, a person who you've just met."
What?
Our chemistry? Did he mean our bickering? We were just trying to roast each other earlier to get rid of each other's company whilst trying to raise our egos! How, in any form or way, would that be considered something remotely close to chemistry?
"Or maybe you two have met before. It's a possibility, you know?"
Nani? No, I haven't met her before, as far as I know. She only looked familiar because her eyes were in that limousine. Or perhaps Nezu-san was implying the car accident itself?
"The fact that you both took no offense from the insults you spat towards each other piqued my interest!" he said, now sounding like some weird mad scientist. "And so, I decided to call you two here!" Yeah, and what are we going to do here? I think that was what Yukinoshita meant earlier. As if he mind-read what I was thinking of, his next words shook me. "After all, you're both here to become my apprentices!"
.
.
.
Huh?!
I quickly widened my eyes whilst furrowing my eyebrows—displaying my confusion. I could see Yukinoshita on the other side, calmly savoring her tea. How is she not surprised?! We're being made personal students of the most intelligent hero of all time!
Dear God, all my precious free time is all going to dissipate! Please help me! I might actually start believing in Christianity just to get over this!
I looked back to the principal who was now sipping his tea once more.
But now that I think about it…
I want to be a shut-in adult with complete financial stability, not a hero necessarily. My Quirk is somehow well-suited for laziness and hero-work, though. And, if I were to become a good strategist like Principal Nezu here, then perhaps I could be a pro hero who just gives random strategies to other pro heroes—thus ignoring the battle part of the job! Ah, that's magnificent! I don't even have to leave my household! Not only that but I also won't be dissected like what I've previously thought!
"Very well, Nezu-sensei," Yukinoshita said, before looking at me. "But are you sure that he's qualified?"
Do you want to bring this outside?!
"Oi. What's that supposed to mean?"
Calmly, she responded, "I'm certain that you are aware of my doubts."
I huffed.
"I don't know what you mean," I began, a cocky tone beginning to be let out. I pointed at myself with my thumb. "I placed first in UA's Multiple Choice portion in the Written Exams! I also happen to be really attractive! Aside from not having any friends or a girlfriend, I happen to be very high-caliber."
She smirked complacently in return. "While your achievement is quite surprising for a person of your intellect, I find your latter statement quite difficult to believe. Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder, so I can say that you don't look good at all. Besides, didn't you get the lowest points ever in the practical exams?"
Tch! Why you—!
"There, there, Hikigaya-kun. I'm pretty sure that Yukinoshita-san over here didn't mean anything bad." I huffed in annoyance. Stupid woman… "Also, Yukinoshita-san, perhaps you should tone it down with the insults for now. It'd be partly difficult to teach a dead body, after all."
.
.
… wait what?
Yukinoshita nodded in response with a small smile. "Very well, Nezu-sensei. However, you should understand that Hiki-dying-corpse-kun here is already on the verge of death. Doing nothing would only delay the inevitable."
"O-oi!" Are they teaming up on me?! And what the hell is with that blatant display of supporting mercy killing?! "This 'dying body' you two are talking about is right here, you know?"
Kocho-sensei smiled, whilst the Ice Cold Princess giggled. Honestly, the nerve! I'm not dying at all! I happen to be quite the lively person at home, you know?! I always tryhard the video games I play!
After a few moments, the chimera began looking at us respectively before asking us.
"So, what do you two say? Do you agree to my offer?"
Since this would benefit me quite well, I nodded, but the Ice Queen beside me seemed as if she had something else to say.
"I am very sorry, Principal Nezu. But— " she looks at me then hides her right hand protectively to her chest dramatically " —I see damage to my person if I begin working with him."
Urgh—this girl! Haven't I talked to her about this before?! I am NOT a sexual predator!
"Oi! I'm not some perverse person," I said, but then I looked at Principal Nezu. "But, now that I think about it, I don't want to stay here if she's included. I'd rather die than work with her."
I turned to look back at the girl beside me as we continued glaring at each other as if we were playing table tennis in the Quirkless Olympics itself.
Stupid Ice Queen. Stupid Demon Superwoman. Stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid—
Deeply amused, Nezu-sensei broke the silence, "Well, it appears your love affair is much stronger than what I have imagined."
Huh?! What did he say?!
"We are not in a love affair!" we shouted at the same time, glaring.
"Oh? Is that so? Well, I think that you two are only declining my offer since you two have other plans on spending your days with each other."
"Hell no—" "I strongly disagree—" we responded in unison.
Nezu-sensei's reply is only an amused laugh. What the heck is this guy thinking?! I will NEVER fall in love with her! Ever! I wouldn't date her even if she were the last girl on earth!
"You two are so cute together!" he began, and I grunted. Nezu's demeanor changed immediately as his eyes seemingly got sharper. "If you two are truly not together, then you two will accept this offer."
.
.
.
Freaking sly chimera!
We both glared at the principal before averting our glares to each other.
With a knowing glance, we both nodded. Then, we looked at the principal.
" Fine—" "Very well, I accept—" both of us said this in a clearly annoyed tone.
This was a super-genius we're talking about. If we decline, then he probably has like, 100 more reasons as to why we'll have to accept. Heck, I'm willing to bet that he already has blackmail material.
Nezu-sensei hummed in a delighted tone before taking a seat at his high office chair once more.
"Great! Well, I also have another reason for summoning the both of you. I invited you two over here to play chess."
Chess? Why? Well, that doesn't matter. If anything, this is quite convenient.
You see, I happen to be very good at chess! A loner who has spent nearly all his time alone, trying to outsmart himself in single-player chess will always be good at chess despite the lack of experience.
Whilst smiling cockily, I saw Nezu-sensei tap a button on his table.
"So, this will be your very first lesson under me."
All of a sudden, the floor separating me from Yukinoshita arose, a chessboard waiting on top. And it appears that all the chess pieces are arranged properly! Wow, what kind of evil lair of an office is this?!
"If I may, Principal Nezu, who will I be opposing?" Yukinoshita asks, eyeing me from the corner of her eye with annoyance.
Hey, is her statement supposed to imply an insult in it? It looks as if she's looking down on me! Well, I really don't care if I'm looked down on. After all, I am very much used to it. I'll just come blitzing back up like an unexpected guest at a secret one-man party!
"I thought that was already obvious, considering the placement of the chessboard."
"Very well," Yukinoshita sighed, averting her gaze to me. "Good luck on our short match, Hikigaya-kun," she says, sticking her hand out.
Short match? Yes, this will be a short match! I'm going to win this and show how much better I am! I reached out my hand to shake hers. But when my hand almost brushed for contact, she quickly retracted it.
"On second thought, perhaps I should skip the handshake. I wouldn't want to be infected with your Hiki-germs, anyway," she said, smirking playfully at me.
"Ah, don't remind me. I just remembered the existence of the newly-discovered Yukinoshita-cooties."
"Hmph."
All I could do was smirk, "Don't worry. I'll go easy on you."
Oh, I am going to completely annihilate this girl.
-o-o-o-o-o-
Oh god, maybe I won't!
I quickly moved my king to another side. I had this awesome plan I had earlier but it completely backfired! This is really bad!
I stared intently into her calm expression as my sweat dripped once more. I then looked back to the chess piece.
'Okay. If I can somehow move my pawn to at least get some momentum going, then maybe I can trap her knight to be eaten by my king!'
Needless to say, that plan did not work, either.
The pieces left in my color were three pawns and my one king. Yukinoshita still had a bishop, two pawns, a knight, and her king.
Well, if I was going to lose, then I had to plan this quickly.
-o-o-o-o-o-
"Ara, Hikigaya-kun. I did not expect you to do that well," she said, nodding. Despite ending in a tie, she was awfully satisfied.
After some more chess pieces moving and some sheer concentrating, I managed to at least get a stalemate. While she may be in favor of winning due to having more high-valued pieces, it was still technically a draw. Gosh darn it, I almost lost to her of all people!
Principal Nezu then clapped his hands. "Well done, I am impressed by the intellect of the both of you! Even if Yukinoshita-san had the advantage in the stale-mate, I must say, you two kept outsmarting each other in every single move!"
Yeah, yeah. I guess one of my 108 skills: "strategizing" requires more refinement. I suppose I could work on increasing it as I bike my way home later on. After all, strategizing about my plans to run away from home is my best form of practice.
"You two passed your entrance examinations to my tutoring with flying colors!"
Wait, what?
Confused, I decided to ask, "Entrance examinations? Weren't we already accepted to your little apprenticeship program before the match even started?"
"No, you both weren't accepted earlier," he admitted, my eyebrows rising ever-so-slightly. Did he lie? "In fact, that was just a logical ruse so that you won't be pressured that much."
Ah, I see.
"Now, why don't each of you fight me at the same time?" he said, clicking another button which raised this time, two squares inside the area of the principal's desk.
I gulped in astonishment. Just how many secret chess boards does this guy have?!
-o-o-o-o-o-
7:59 AM
The sounds of footsteps echoing around the now-lively hallway littered with chattering normies entering their respective classrooms were audible enough to reach my ears. My indoor shoes, ever-so calmly taking their strides to match the other set of feet to its right.
"I suppose that was… quite the experience, I must say," Yukinoshita remarked.
"Mm."
My eyes peered at the irradiating heated tiles of UA's main school building as the rays of spring's sunlight bore into my skin. The air kissed my cheeks with a cool breeze as the walk back to our classroom continued.
Principal Nezu was apparently going easy on us despite us getting destroyed in the game of chess repeatedly. I guess nobody—even me, should challenge that beast of an animal. I mean, he had like 254 IQ for god's sake!
But, something else made me shiver.
Flashback
Nezu smiled cheerily, peering at both of us. "Good job, you two! Now, you will both be taking your leave. If my estimation is correct, then there are approximately 30 minutes left before your class starts."
We were in here for that long?! Woah!
"But, before you two go, I will change your schedules—just the two of you. You will both be attending meetings with me at 5 PM, also known as the after-club period for most clubs, every Wednesday. That will begin next week."
After club meetings? Wait, what if you're part of the: 'go home club'?! I do not want to waste my quality time when I could be sleeping and dozing off in my bed! Besides, didn't I earn myself a date to my bed every day after classes next week from getting hit by the stupid car?! Nooo!
"Another thing is, you will both have to try keeping our sessions as a secret. Even most of the personnel will not know of this, but it would be great if you didn't tell your classmates or your teachers."
"Yes sir," we responded in unison.
He smiled and hummed delightfully in response. "Great!"
End Of Flashback
Dang… what is it with me and these stupid anime flashbacks?
"We didn't even stand a chance with Principal Nezu…" I commented, sighing.
Yukinoshita looked at me as if she was inspecting a garbage can then smirked.
"That's for you. I actually managed to take a few of his pieces on each of our rounds," she replied, nodding to herself. "Our games lasted longer compared to yours when I checked the standings and score plates after my matches."
"Sh-shut up," I replied indignantly, looking in the other direction and averting my gaze from her eyes. "Besides, it was to be expected that I stood no chance whatsoever."
She chuckled after, "It appears we've come to a mutual understanding."
"What? No! Even you didn't stand a chance!"
The girl looked at me complacently. "Hoh? Please care to elaborate?"
Ha! I can't wait to wipe that smug look off of her face!
"If you didn't know, I was also observing your matches. Every single round was finished in a few seconds less compared to your previous rounds," I said, smirking.
I looked over to her only to see her still smirking. Wait, smirking? She's still looking at me smugly?
"While I indeed praise you for your observation, I must say, it appears that you have a problem with concentration. No wonder you were obliterated and easily checkmated so fast that last round."
A-ah.
I narrowed my eyes and glared at her.
I know that I'm used to being embarrassed all over and over again, but this is different! I'm being embarrassed in front of this freaking demon girl pretty badly! There used to be a time in my middle school when I was always being embarrassed every single day in front of many different beautiful women. But this case is different. I'm being embarrassed in wordplay—something I am certainly not well acquainted with. Every single offending statement I attempt to hurl at her, she will throw back at twice the speed and strength.
However, there's a special difference between the girl before me and all the girls that I've met before.
That one significant discrepancy is that…
She's the Ice Queen.
.
.
.
And so, Yukinoshita Yukino freezingly makes her entrance.
Chapter - End
References:
[1] Kaneki Ken is a ghoul from "Tokyo Ghoul".
[2] Reference to Dolph's death in "Nichijou".
[3] Demons are nocturnal entities from "Demon Slayer".
[4] Generation of Miracles is an all-star team in "Kuroko no Basuke".
[5] There is a talking starfish from "One Piece".