AN: Hello readers once again, back at it with another chapter! Which, unfortunately, is written months apart from the others. Don't worry, I haven't forgotten you guys!

My sincerest apologies…

Anyway, back to the plot!

Kitty POV…

When you throw up lava as a giant alien cat, there are three things that you should know.

One, it's going to feel like the most satisfying release of pent-up energy that one can experience. Like when your stomach aches so bad that you can't even move, but then you burp and the pain and hardship all just disappear and you feel better than you have felt in a while. It's a lot like that in the way that you feel something leave you.

Two, it burns like hell! I can only imagine what this flying alien whale is going through.

Three, it leaves the most bitter taste in your mouth, it's as if stomach acid had coated the inside of my mouth. Not the best feeling in the world.

I felt the anger and rage leave me as I shrunk back down to the size of your normal and mild-mannered housecat. My mouth still tasted of acid, as I was spitting out chunks of molten rock.

After about a minute, I finally got the taste out of my mouth and instinctually began licking my paw, cleaning myself. I glanced back up to where my friends Steve and Thor were standing.

"Oh… wow." Thor stammered out. His facial expression was similar to that of a person who found out that their cat was actually a powered-up alien that could shoot lasers out of its eyes.

Steve was looking at Thor with an expression that read 'I told you so'.

The crowd of cat lovers were already long gone, I guess my little display inspired fear rather than admiration. It made sense, a small seemingly harmless animal suddenly busts out with all these powers and then grows to be ten times your size, that's terrifying.

Steve, who had put his shield on his back, knelt down and opened his hands towards me.

"Come ere' Mittens!" Steve said like he was coaxing a tiger to jump into his arms. The man himself looked like quite the character, his face bruised and bloody, uniform torn up, purple blood everywhere, and on top of that his torso was covered with a light dusting of orange cat hair.

What took me aback was the name he gave me, Mittens. My feline head swung down to look at my paws which were covered with dried up purple blood, but only the paws on all four of my legs were coated with the foreign blood. I guess you could say that I looked like I had mittens on.

"Are you referring to the C.A.T.?" Thor spelled out to Steve. Which was kind of offensive, I can understand everything they're saying. It's almost as if Thor thinks that I'm a… Well even I don't know what I am.

"Yes Thor, I am talking to Mittens. He or she… or… it is an intelligent being that we should respect." Steve responded not taking his eyes off of mine.

"Well alright then… Mittens. I am Thor and this is Steve and we are a part of the super team called the Avengers." Thor said to me in a tone like he was addressing any other person or alien cat monster, which I much appreciated.

I nodded my head slowly at him. "Meow."

What I meant to say was: Why, it is so nice to meet you both, say do you know what is causing this whole invasion? Because Nick Fury kind of turned me loose on the alien invaders and told me not to kill certain people.

But I don't think that either of them understands what I just said because I am a-

"Well, I certainly hope that Fury told you not to kill me, our battle would be legendary. How did he even get such a specimen as you in his captivity?" Thor said nonchalantly while throwing his hammer through the chest of six aliens and hit three more as it returned to his hand.

Wait.

Thor can understand what I'm saying?

In orbit high above New York…

Beavis and Butthead were snickering to themselves, as if they just saw something really funny happen.

"Should we also give the ability to the blue and white one?" Asked Butthead with a grin on his face.

"Yes, I think without the gift our creation probably won't last long, maybe he'll die of boredom." Beavis confirmed as he waved his hand down on Earth as if he was saying hello.

"I kind of like Mittens, don't you? It's a good name." Butthead asked Beavis.

Kitty POV…

"Meow!"

I couldn't help it, I let out a loud meow of excitement which translated to: Fuck yes! Finally! Someone who understands! I have so many questions!

"Hey language," Steve said to me sternly, but then his eyes quickly widened. "I can understand what you're saying Mittens."

"MEOW!"

I let out which translated to: Fuck! You too Steve! Hell yeah! I'm making so many friends. Guys, are you proud of me!

When I say 'guys' I'm referring to the two fuckheads who put my soul into this fucked up alien cat thing.

Steve and Thor both exchanged confused yeahs. As if they thought I was referring to them when I said guys.

"Meow"

I vocalized, which meant: it's a long story I'll tell you later, but for now, I would like to know just what the FUCK is happening.

"Aliens are invading, and we ourselves only know: Loki is the mastermind of the invasion, which is his brother." Steve explained, nodding his head to Thor, his arms still out in front of him as if he still wanted me to jump into them to which I shamelessly obliged.

"Yes, Loki is my brother and the god of mischief and I am the god of thunder!" Thor admitted cheerfully as he raised his large hammer to the heavens and several bolts of lightning spawned from the seemingly cloudless sky, eradicating twelve aliens closing in on their position.

"Meow?"

"Well, before you turned super huge and threw up lava on that giant snake, I couldn't understand you at all, now whenever you… you know… meow, half a second later a deep voice reverberates through my mind saying the things that you apparently said." Steve answered down into his arms where I sat comfortably.

"Meow."

"Me personally, he creeps me out with his mysteriously wounded eye, but if Fury is out here somewhere fighting with us then he is someone I will follow." Thor responded to me.

Steve and Thor had started to walk down the street towards Stank tower, still kicking alien ass as they walked.

"Meow."

Nick Fury POV…

"I cannot believe this shit." Nick Fury said to himself as he tried to make sense of the last twenty-four hours.

He put his trust in Kraken, a monster alien cat thing that he didn't really know what he was but he was supposedly rampaging through the streets.

Aliens were sacking the city from a huge hole in the sky that allegedly led to the edge of space.

Fury himself was sitting at a table in a blasted open Starbucks with his gun pointed at the huge hole in the wall, every now and then he fired off a shot and an alien would fall to the ground. He had made himself a cup of coffee which was black like the color of his assault rifle and the twenty empty clips laying around the Starbucks.

"Mothafucka." Nick sighed as he drank his coffee.

Kitty POV…

As we were walking along the street, we came upon a red headed woman wearing a suit that was way too tight to be comfortable. She was fighting three aliens with a gun that she most likely stole off an alien. In a flurry of movement, she backflipped away from the aliens and when she landed, she fired upon all three and killed them.

"Friend Romanoff!" Thor exclaimed at her. As he did, 'friend Romanoff' whipped the gun around and pointed it at us. Her figure shaking violently like she had been on an adrenaline high for hours, her stomach rising and falling as she was breathing rapidly. The top third of her suit was open allowing a spectacular view of her ample-

"Oh, it's just you guys." She said breathlessly, relief evident in her tone as she relaxed her aim only to whip the barrel up again and fire at us. The laser went right by Steve's head and into the head of an alien, terrifyingly impressive

"Friend Romanoff! Meet friend Mittens!" Thor exclaimed over the sound of aliens flying in machines over our head, to which Thor threw his mighty hammer and brought them down in a massive explosion.

"Natasha, this is Mittens." Steve said as he maneuvered me in his arms and suddenly, I was being held out in front of him facing the woman. Steve's arms were fully extended and his hands under my front shoulders forcing my arms to straighten out, like a zombie would hold his arms, towards Natasha.

"Steve, why are you holding a cat named Mittens in the middle of an alien invasion? In this case a cat's life is worth like one tenth of a human's life, we shouldn't even be worried about cats right now. What have you been doing this whole time while we were fighting?" Natasha interrogated him, her voice getting more and more frantic and her eyes becoming harsher as she kept talking.

"Meow." I let out moodily, my eyes only half open. Making my face look like I hated everyone and everything.

"Sure thing Mittens, I'll tell her. Natasha, you need to calm down. Mittens says he doesn't like your tone or the way you're talking about him in front of his face, Mittens also says that a cat's life is worth much more than you would expect." Steve said in a nasal tone, still holding me out in front of him, my face a foot away from Natasha's and my eyes were level with hers.

Her gaze was intense and her facial expression was like that of a woman that was so intensely confused and angry. On the flip side Steve wore a goofy grin and an innocent expression, like he knew she would try and hit him but he was using me as a shield, it makes sense because his weapon that he uses is a literal shield.

"Friend Mittens, I'm sure she meant no disrespect! I admit when I first saw you, I was confused as well, but now I understand!" Thor exclaimed at me in defense of Natasha over the sound of battle as he slammed his hammer into the face of an alien that had charged their position, sending the head flying and the body just went limp and fell. He literally knocked the head off that alien.

Natasha's mood didn't improve, in fact it worsened.

"You mean to tell me," Natasha started in a poisonous tone, addressing both men, "that this cat has somehow captured your attention in the middle of a life-or-death battle with invading aliens from a wormhole in the sky, and it's talking to you?"

When she says it like that I have to wonder: Are Steve and Thor fucking insane?

"Mittens has actually been helping us repel the aliens. He took down two Leviathans like it was child's play. You really shouldn't judge a book by its cover, Natasha." Steve lectured her while playing with me, moving my arms as if im the one talking. If I were Natasha, I would have punched him in the face long ago.

Suddenly from the woman's right ear I heard: Cap, blast refraction.

Then I was unceremoniously dropped into the arms of the dangerously mad woman, who maybe upon reflex, held me close to her bosom, squeezing me to her. In my past life, something like this has never happened before. I had never been super tiny or pressed up against the chest of a beautiful woman, but all I can say now is that I am a big fan of this. I like this much more than sleeping on top of a stained adult magazine in a box while it's raining on a fire escape.

Steve held up his shield as a red and gold man robot thing flew over head and blasted Steve's shield with a beam of energy. The shield reflected the energy at a different angle, so Steve aimed his shield at as many enemy aliens as he could, cutting through most of them.

"What's the situation Tony?" Steve exclaimed as the energy beam ceased and he lowered his shield.

The red and gold robot dropped down on the pavement landing in the textbook superhero position and a man with a bow jumped off his back tripping and falling flat on his face, but he scrambled to his feet and acted like nothing happened. Then the robot stood up and the faceplate opened up revealing a Caucasian man with very heavily styled facial hair. I see now this thing is a flying suit of armor, a very dangerous flying suit of armor with a cool dude inside.

"No end in sight, they just keep coming through. Banner disabled Loki by smashing him on the ground repeatedly but the invasion is still ensuing without him, Barton ran out of arrows, also the worlds representatives are contemplating on leveling the city with a nuke. Honestly, I can't see another way to end it without nuclear destruction. But maybe the nuclear damage doesn't have to be in New York." Tony said very intelligently with a tone like he new what the fuck was going on and he was leagues of thought ahead of everyone.

"What are you saying Stark?" Natasha asked him, her chest vibrating with every word.

"I mean if they do decide to send a nuke, they could shoot it inside the wormhole and maybe this whole nightmare will end. Also, we separated Loki from his favorite stick. It's on the roof of my house with that machine that made the wormhole." Tony responded gravely but sarcastically, his eyes landing on Natasha's and then mine, jealousy evident in his eyes. He was probably thinking I wish I was that cat.

"Whose raccoon is this?" Stark remarked while looking at me.

"Hey that's not a raccoon Tony, that's a cat and his name is Mittens." Steve announced to Tony whose facial expression stayed grave, clearly trying to lift the mood with the raccoon comment.

"Oh, why hello Mittens, how rude of me not to address you properly." Tony said to me, complete with a mock bow, his suit making whirring sounds as he moved.

"Meow." I responded moodily.

I meant to say: Tony Stank, I officially hate you. But he didn't hear me because he, unlike Steve and Thor, does not have the ability to understand me.

Thor and Steve gave a chuckle but I could feel Natasha flinch. Her grip on me tightened and she rested her chin on the top of my head, like a child would hold a stuffed animal.

Could she understand me as well like Thor and Steve? Was she panicking like she was when Steve was holding me?

I put a comforting paw on her chest about two inches above the warm squishies that were on her chest over her heart and cuddled into her neck. This made her glance down at me but she soon resumed the position of cuddling me to her.

"Is it an emotional support animal? That I could understand, chicks and warzones don't really mix." Tony remarked snootily.

"Tasha, why are you holding a cat?" The bowman asked the woman holding me.

The bowman's arms were full of veins and his face looked like one I had only ever seen on a tourist. He had a country face for sure. His eyes were very sharp, like nothing went unnoticed under his watch.

"Um, his name is Mittens." She reluctantly said, all hostility in her tone was gone.

In the Space Base…

"Ok I think I can understand the first two guys we granted the ability to hear Mittens. But why the woman?" Butthead asked.

"Cause I don't give a damn." Beavis replied like he just did something epic.

Butthead was about to say something in retaliation but he realized that whenever he did stuff like this was when he was the happiest.

"Dude, just shut up and keep watching." Butthead clapped back half-heartedly with a smirk as he was crunching on his fourteenth bag of popcorn.

Mittens POV…

The moment Natasha said my name, I felt my heart melt in my chest. Granted it wasn't really my name, my name was actually Bartholomew which is long for Bart, but it doesn't seem that relevant at the moment so I'm going to keep quiet about that whole thing until this massive alien invasion problem is solved.

Steve turned to Natasha with a knowing look but said nothing while he threw his shield upwards in a seemingly random direction. There was a distant *clink* sound, like an aluminum bat hitting a shin, then not even two seconds later, Steve raised his arm and caught the shield as it reappeared from out of nowhere. All this was followed by a huge explosion on the side of a building across from us. Causing rubble to rain down on the street.

Tony's faceplate suddenly smashed down into place and he blasted off in the direction of the Hudson going very fast.

"Tony what's going on?" Steve questioned seriously into his earpiece. His entire demeanor changed from not serious to very fucking serious.

From Natashas earpiece I heard: They decided instead of letting us try and repel the invasion, that New York and its many inhabitants were expendable. They sent the nuke approximately ten seconds ago, I'm going to try and direct it into the wormhole before it's too late.

"Tony, whatever you do, do it now. If what you're saying is true then we are all doomed." Barton said while his finger was in his ear while slapping the shit out of an alien with his bow.

From the woman's earpiece I heard: No pressure.

Turning away from the others, she walked over to a broken slab of concrete, sitting on it like it was a throne. Natasha then took me away from her glorious squishies as she held me in her outstretched arms much like Steve did but facing her. Her eyes were curious and dissecting, suspicion marred her beautiful features. The suit and her chest were lightly covered in orange cat hair.

"Just what are you?" She asked me quietly, still holding me out in front of her face like a baby.

"Meow."

That meant: Even I don't know, I used to be a human but I died and I was born into this world as a cat. I also don't know what the hell is going on, but people are starting to understand me and I can talk to some people now!

"You were a human? Like you had a life before all this? How did you even end up here?" Natasha interrogated as she squinted her eyes.

After a second I responded. "Meow."

Which meant: Yeah! I was a true blue twenty-two year old dude that had like… alot of cancer, like an excessive amount of cancer. When I was dying, two beings approached me and I woke up in this world only to be captured and frozen by that Nick Fury that you all work for. I don't trust that guy one bit.

Natasha paused and thought for a millisecond.

"Could it be possible to change you back to a human? Have you even thought about that?" She questioned thoughtfully.

She got me there, I hadn't even explored the possibility that I could change back, like I haven't even thought about it. It is definitely something that I would like to do later.

"Meow."

Meaning: That's definitely something that you and I should attempt after this… privately. I have a vague memory of what I look like, but I bet I'll look very different. Like maybe I'll have cat ears or a tail.

"Why just you and me… in private?" She curiously asked, her cheeks became more pink and her head tilted to the right a bit which I thought was insanely cute and made my heart melt all over again causing me to squirm a bit in her grasp.

Keep it together man, it's just one woman.

An insanely hot woman.

"Meow." I responded after I gathered myself.

Which translates to: Because I trust you the most, it's definitely not because you are a knockout of a broad. I seem to have this comforting effect on you when you are upset. It's also just my opinion, but I think you are very adorable.

Natasha blinked and pursed her lips a bit, her cheeks flushing red because of my blatant flirting. If I hadn't thought any better, I would think I got her attention. She thought for a second before replying. I would be thinking a bit too, if a cat were hitting on me, I have no idea what is going through her head right now but I hope she doesn't just chuck me across the street.

"As of right now, you are a cat. What kind of person would I be if I was sexually attracted to a small cat? Turn into a human and then try saying that again, got it Tiger?" She said like she was a perplexed parent explaining a math problem to an eighth grader.

Holy shit score!

I think…

My thoughts were interrupted by the largest and greenest thing I have ever seen smash into a building and fall onto the street. In the monster's arms was the unmoving red metallic figure of Tony Stark.

Natasha put me back on her chest next to her squishies hugging me to her heart once again like a stuffed animal. Now I would like to point out to everyone that Natasha knows I was a man, a man who has shown interest in her. A man that is currently a cat, but could also maybe transform back into a man. All signs point to her being a total cat lady.

The red head ran towards the monster and Tony, the green thing was probably a good guy. I just didn't know it yet.

Thor, Steve, and Barton were already there looking down at Stark as he lay there. The green thing, which I'm assuming is Banner, ripped off Tony's faceplate and we all stared at him for a good minute. That is until Banner roared in Starks face and he abruptly awoke.

"Is it over?" Tony asked no one in particular.

"It seems when you flew up into the wormhole with the nuke, every invading alien was shut down like someone unplugged a cord. You stopped the Invasion Tony." Steve said approvingly like he just gave his son some really shitty life advice but it actually turned out great for him.

"Good job everyone, really pat yourselves on the back here guys." Stark said again to no one in particular.

"What now?" Barton asked the rest of the Avengers.

"I saw a shawarma joint a couple blocks that way." Tony replied curtly, his arm pointing to the direction of the aforementioned shawarma joint.

"Do you think cats can eat shawarma? Or do we have to stop by a store or something." Natasha wondered aloud while stroking my head.

"I think that fuckin dog… I mean cat… uh… Martins… uh...Mittens, deserves a delicious shawarma dinner, a warm bath, and an official Avengers ID collar. Mittens is now one of the Earth's mightiest heroes and he shall be treated as such." Tony declared, eyes closed on the ground while pointing everywhere with his other arm that is not pointing at the shawarma joint.

I have no idea what a shawarma joint is or what kind of food they serve, but it sounds like a good deal to me. Also apparently I'm an Avenger now too.

Don't know how that's going to go over with Fury, but I hope my new friends can protect me if he tries something.

But overall,

Nice.

Iron Man POV…

I am so fucking tired I dont want to get up. The only image in my mind is a plate of hot shawarma if that is even how it is served. Romanoff said something about cats and if they are able to eat shawarma or not.

Oh shit the fucking cat. What's his name?

Martins?

No, Mittens.

You know what I'm fuckin Iron Man and I can do whatever the hell I want.

The cat is now an Avenger. He will be the group cat. I love it.

"Now can somebody get me up, not looking at you big guy. Point Break! Help me up!" I exclaimed to the sky.

Kitty POV…

Barton, Banner, Thor, Steve, along with Iron Man himself flew up to the top floor of Tony's apartment to capture Loki before he got away, leaving little old me with Natasha the cat lady.

Natasha found an expensive looking suv, totally not drivable, but you could still sit in it. All leather interior and the whole shebang. It would look out of place amongst all the destruction if not for the huge hole in the roof. She plopped down on the very back seat, while putting the seat in front of her all the way down so she could prop her feet up.

As soon as she was situated on the seat, she let out a huge sigh and her entire body went limp. Her grip on me loosened as she relaxed in the seat. I jumped out of her arms and into her lap, taking a good look at her face. It was covered in little cuts and bruises but she still looked very beautiful regardless of all that.

Then she started to cry.

Not like crying normally, but ugly crying.

I curled up in a little ball on her lap, just trying to reassure her that I was there. She kept crying, but she grabbed me around the torso and held me to her heart once more. I felt every hitch of her breath through the vibrations in her throat. Every crying induced cough jolted me violently.

"Meow!" I exclaimed while being suffocated.

Which roughly translated to: Natasha! Why are you crying so hard? Calm down and talk it out with me please!

Whether or not she heard me she didn't acknowledge. She was uncontrollably crying with no end in sight. A small feline such as myself could not gain her attention. She then abruptly dropped me on her lap and put her face in her hands and continued to violently sob.

As if to be the answer to all my problems a voice chimed in my head:

Conditions for human transformation met: 120,538 of 500 square feet of flesh devoured

Conditions for ideal body met: 1256 of 500 eyeballs popped

Conditions for great power met: 792 of 750 alien kidneys incinerated

Conditions for a high five by your two favorite buddy's met: 1 of 1 hot girls interested in you

These conditions do not need to be met again and the effects are 100% permanent thanks to you meeting the threshold of all three conditions within twenty-four hours. Because you have obtained great power you can transform from cat to human form at any time.

That last one is just to let you know that we are still here and over these last twelve years we would like to talk to you once again. It's dreadfully boring up here.

See ya real soon!

Oh… thanks guys. This is the first time I've heard from them in twelve years, but I guess they have been watching me for all this time. I would love to talk to them about what they've seen.

In the SPACE BASE…

Beavis and Butthead were on the edge of their seats, watching the madness unfold. Their wardrobe had once again changed, leaving them both in sweatpants and a shirt that had Natasha Romanov's face on it.

"Wait what's happening?" Beavis asked Butthead.

"Ah I see that the conditions I have put in place have been met." Butthead explained suddenly talking very wise for someone that Beavis thought he was.

"What are you talking about?" Beavis asked slowly.

"So you see, I have put in a set of conditions that, once met, allow him to turn into a human." Butthead replied smartly.

"You… what?" Beavis asked dumbfounded.

"You see, humans can't mate with cats like we had previously witnessed on another planet. But thinking about it now, it has taken up a rather taboo definition in my mind. so I put in a set of conditions that can turn him into a human man once again. But I never expected him to reach all three quotas so handily." Butthead replied.

"Who… are you?" Beavis questioned like he had been lied to his whole life.

"I'm just your goofy friend man, why are you so serious?" Butthead replied normally

Beavis gave him the stink eye from across the couch.

"Also, he seems like a very personable soul, our new friend. I think it's time we do what we talked about a year ago when we were waiting for the aliens to invade Earth." Butthead suggested excitedly while looking down upon their creation.

Beavis' eyes went from glaring to staring wide open incredulously at his power buddy.

"You want to do that? But that would limit our power and we would be looked at like fiends on Earth's streets. Plus we can't kill anybody directly, you know this." Beavis said seriously.

"We'll be fine bro, and that hasn't stopped you from killing anybody. Remember when you put those thoughts in that one girl's head and because of that, her husband quit working as a waiter in a restaurant and went back to college to get his engineering degree and worked for five years, only to die from over exposure to radiation while working in a nuclear power plant? All because he spit in someone's food." Butthead replied sassily, "We can still do whatever we wish to whomever we wish to do it to, it just takes a bit longer bro."

"You still surprise me after all these years bro." Beavis said meaningfully, his voice full of emotion.

"Nah bro I've always been like this it's just that I can be really dumb around you, because when your around me you are really smart. When in reality we both have the same level of intellect." Butthead stated as he took his eyes off the action for two seconds to look at his very best friend.

Suddenly Beavis lunged at Butthead, putting him in a powerful bear hug.

"I would like to remind you that we both have socks on so this isn't gay bro" Beavis clarified while burying his face into his friends shoulder.

"I appreciate you mentioning that man." Butthead responded, returning the bro hug with fervor.

After a minute of this they both pulled apart.

"No homo." They both said in unison as their attention turned back to the battle at hand.

Mittens POV…

I hopped off the lap of the crying russian and walked over onto the middle seat of the back row. In my mind I thought about the disembodied voice and what it offered.

Transform?

The voice offered me, I thought yes and a sound like a tower fan began to sound out in my mind. My body started to rapidly change, My front legs becoming hands and arms, my back legs becoming feet and human legs. My torso began to grow, becoming taller and wider like a humans. My head grew bigger and I felt my mouth and nose grow apart.

The transformation was complete and the tower fan sound in my mind ceased. Natasha however had stopped crying and was staring at me. Did I look weird?

Natasha POV…

In my grief I had not noticed Mittens hop off my lap and onto the seat beside me. With my face in my hands, my right side suddenly became very warm. Like there was a ray of sunshine shining on the right side of my body. I took my hands away and looked at Mittens.

Woah…

Sitting next to me was a large and very muscular man with dark brown hair in the strangest style: A mullet his hair in the sides of his head were shaved to where there was only about a millimeter of hair. Whereas the hair on the back of his head went down to his shoulders framing his head with a very noble tone.

That wasn't all. The fact that this man was completely naked except for a pair of boxers clinging to his legs put me off guard and as if to top it all off he was covered head to toe with sweat.

My eyes scanned his muscular figure as if looking at a large meal, and I was starving. The only thing that was off putting was the absence of rippling abdominals she had seen in other men, instead it was just a bit fatty, like what the kids these days have been calling a 'dad bod.' After I was done staring this man up and down, all the information I gathered pointed towards one conclusion: everything about this man was just really big.

"Mittens?" I asked

"Meow…" He responded.

A large stretch of silence ensued before he spoke up again.

"I'm just kidding Natasha it's me Mittens!" The man revealed proudly.

Mittens POV…

As I gazed at Natasha's surprised expression, her eyes roaming over my body somewhat… hungrily

I glanced down at myself and realized that I was only wearing a single article of clothing which was covering my bulge…. My johnson…. My jimmy…. My big man…. Which was about the same size really.

The only difference was that I must have put on about 130 pounds in muscle, not to mention my abs, they were completely gone!

Well I didn't really have those Hawaiian roll abs that all the women desired, I just was really skinny so you could see my abs.

Now there is just a bunch of fat down there, but for some reason, I don't care. It's as if the rest of my muscles make up for it.

"Well this is weird." I said to the now small woman to my left. I rubbed the back of my head, which was the universal symbol for this is awkward, only to find long hair. I ran my hand through it glamorously, my sweet mullet I was afraid I'd never see again was on my head!

Natasha had her jaw wide open, as if to welcome a fly to buzz around in there, looked like she was at a loss for words, I guess she hadn't expected so much… man... from a cat.

She quickly shook off the shock of my revelation and spun around to face me, pulling her legs in criss cross style like a kindergartner. While wiping all traces of her despair with her sleeve, and she did that somehow without messing up her makeup.

"You've thrown me off guard here Mittens, when you said you were a quote on quote 'dude', did you really mean to say that you were a country version of mega chad?" Natasha questioned with a genuinely curious look on her face.

Well at least she wasn't crying anymore, and at least I'm not a cat. Granted I was just getting the hang of being a furry feline and combat was never easier than when I was a cat.

"Calm down girlie, I'm still a city boy. I've just always admired the country part of America." I answered.

"Speaking of your past life, what did you do? Like what was your purpose?" The secret agent asked me.

"Well I'm not too proud of it but… I was a criminal. New York was riddled with crime and my parents died when I was a baby, leaving me in the custody of my more than mean step parents." I responded.

"Let me guess," Natasha interrupted. "You ran away from home and joined the bad crowd."

"Yes and that crowd and I made a faction called the junkyard dogs, specializing in kidnapping kids from rich parents just for money." I finished.

Natasha looked into my eyes for a while. Did I reveal too much? Is she disgusted about what I was?

"Like I said I'm not proud of it." I said shamefully as I looked out the window of the car at a clothes department store. Man I'm embarrassed AND naked, how fuckin weird.

"Do you realize that what you did today redeems you completely of all that stuff? You saved lives and stopped the bad guys. Seems to me like you've turned a new page." Natasha pointed out.

After hearing her words I perked up. I did save lives, and I killed the bad guys. From Cecilia to most of New York, I saved people.

"By the way, we aren't all goody two shoes like captain good morals." Said Natasha with a smirk.

"We meaning-

"The Avengers, yes." Natasha confirmed.

"Oh really?" I asked

" I also used to kidnap people, but then again I was also an assassin." She elaborated.

I stared at her with awe. An assassin?

Before I could ask her about that she interrupted me.

"Let's put some clothes on you Mittens, I'm having a hard time focusing on our conversation." Natasha ordered.

"Ok ok." I responded as she crawled out of the car on all fours, unintentionally shoving her ass in my face.

I started to stare until I realized that I was a human and I can't get away with that shit anymore. Too late I was starting to get excited.

Using my quick thinking, I thought 'I've never had a boner while being a cat, so I'll just turn into a cat again.'

Turn into a cat?

A voice in my brain asked.

Yes please.

There was a poof sound and I felt as if I had just become a cat again. I glanced down, no boner.

Awesome.

I climbed out of the car and jumped onto the pavement. Natasha looked up at where my head would be if I was human and then looked back down to see my cat form posted up on the curb. Her face filled with confusion.

"Meow." I vocalized which meant: Sorry I thought it would be weird if the rest of the team saw me as a 'mega chad' rather than the cat you've been fighting with. So please keep the fact that I'm a human away from the others. Except Steve, Steve's chill.

Natasha nodded, an indicator that she knew what I just said. She turned around and started to walk, only to hesitate. She quickly spun back around and opened her arms again so she could carry me.

This is totally not weird after what happened, but I'll allow it. I jumped into her arms and she turned back to the store.

"I'm still getting you clothes." The secret agent stated as she walked into the store.

AN: Bit of a longer chapter here, but we love that don't we!

Let me know what you think!

Until next time…