Chapter 6

Friday

4:05 p.m.

Olivia opened her eyes and just lay there, listening. All was quiet in the room and she looked to her left to see that her wife's side was empty.

She and her wife had lay down together and the brunette realized she must have fallen asleep while the kids were napping. She thought Alex had been sleeping, as well, but now that she looked at the empty side. The pillow was fluffed, the sheet and quilt remade, and she knew that the blonde probably hadn't slept much. She reached to her right side and lifted her iPhone, looking at the time. It was 4:07 p.m. She set the cell back down and let out a deep, luxuriating yawn.

She sat up and stretched, deciding that she should get up.

She moved, in just a white tank and her white bikini underwear, peering into the empty crib and large bassinet, before she lifted her short, black kimono robe from the foot, placing it on and haphazardly tying the ties.

The ocean breeze was coming in through the half-open screen and she stepped to go out onto the balcony. Leaning against the railing, she watched the ebb and flow of the afternoon waves, feeling her freshly washed hair blow in the cool breeze.

She didn't know why she was so exhausted, but at the same time knew exactly why. She was emotionally drained. This whole case, this whole situation was zapping her energy in more ways than one.

She closed her eyes and took in a deep breath of the fresh air and smiled. God, she loved it here. With Alex's parents and Katie helping out with the kids, it was an absolute Godsend to young parents in the prime of their lives.

The prime of their lives.

Olivia opened her eyes now and watched a couple walk along the beach, hand in hand, cuddling, laughing.

They would need to tell the elder Cabots about the brunette's impending departure. They had decided, jointly, that they would tell them that evening at dinner. Bill Cabot would have his typical laid-back attitude about the entire situation, encouraging Olivia to do what she had to do. But, on the other hand, Cathy Cabot would have questions. A lot of questions. She was very similar to her blonde wife when it came to things like this.

She had learned that about her wife. Although Alex wished and thought that she was very different than her mother she, in fact, was very similar.

Olivia took another deep breath, knowing now that it was the right time to let them know.

Perhaps Alex was already upstairs, telling them. Although they hadn't discussed the whens and hows it would occur, it was going to happen, needed to happen. And it needed to happen soon.

She gave the ocean one last look and then ambled inside, closing the screen door behind her.

Dressing in a pair of mid-thigh length black shorts and a crewneck, charcoal gray cable-knit sweater, she headed upstairs to see what everyone was up to.

4:21 p.m.

Alex smiled at Theo in his clamped, over the table tray as he happily munched on fresh sliced peaches and bananas. Her twins were in their highchairs, both also eagerly eating their soft fruit with their hands, little feet bobbing up and down.

She cradled her mug of warm chai latte, watching as her mother sat with her own mug, to the left of the twins, Alex on Theo's right.

"Tell me, Alex...how is everything with you and Olivia?"

Alex watched her mother now, those aged blue eyes penetrating her very soul. "Good, Mom."

Cathy only waited, still looking at her intently.

Alex laughed lightly and then looked down at her mug, still in the outfit from the trip.

She had lay down with her wife and kids, but as soon as the brunette had fallen asleep, she had taken a walk on the beach to try and clear her mind.

But it had done no good.

"Is something going on with you?"

Alex looked at her mother again. "Going on?"

"Alex. Honey. A mother knows these things." She smiled.

"I know you do, Mom." She looked at Isabel now, who was slapping a piece of banana against the top of her tray, spreading it out like artwork. "Olivia…" Alex stopped herself, watching as her wife entered the kitchen, looking fresh and rested, her chestnut hair down and wavy.

And she looked amazingly gorgeous.

Alex caught eyes with her before continuing. "I'm glad Liv is here right now because we do have something to tell you." She caught eyes with the brunette now and a look of absolute worry was on that olive-complexioned face. "Right, Liv?"

She looked back at her mother, absolute worry in the older woman's face. "Nothing bad, Mom."

Olivia moved to sit at the other head of the table before relaxing and looking at her.

"Can I tell her?" Alex asked.

Olivia nodded and Alex took a deep breath. She watched as Bill Cabot and Katie entered now, Katie busying herself with something in the oven, Bill coming to stand off to the side to listen.

Alex continued. "Olivia has to go undercover. Sunday evening."

There. It was out.

Alex looked at her father, who was smiling.

"Our Olivia, doing her job, protecting the city." He winked.

Katie paused, taking her oven mitts off, watching.

"Why? Where?" Cathy asked.

Alex smiled. "I can't tell you much. You know that, Mom. But she has to go and I was hoping that…" Alex looked at Olivia, "...you all would help me while she's gone."

"Of course, Dear," Cathy answered, looking at Olivia. "Do you have to go, Olivia? Is it not something you can get out of?"

Olivia looked like a caged animal at that moment, but she watched her wife manage a small smile and a light laugh. "Undercover, Cathy. That's all I can say."

A silence now among the adults.

"I made some macaroni and cheese for the babies," Katie offered. "Something they can eat and enjoy. They can have some fish and some mac and cheese..."

The adults looked at the chubby housekeeper.

Alex smiled. "Thanks, Katie. I think they'll like that." She looked at Olivia. "As will my wife."

Alex and Olivia caught eyes then, something passing between them.

But Alex wasn't sure what. Maybe she shouldn't have told them. Maybe she should have waited, like they had planned. But it was out there now, and there wasn't anything anyone could do about it.

"How long will you be gone, Dear?"

Olivia looked at her mother-in-law. "I don't know, Cathy. It just depends."

Another silence among the adults, the kids now quiet, as well.

"Well, we will take care of Alex, of our grandbabies, and everything will be OK," Bill Cabot cooed.

Alex smiled at her father. "Thanks, Daddy."

9:41 p.m.

They had had dinner, kids placed in their beds, and the ladies were left with each other, the older Cabots having turned in for the evening.

The two ladies were on the main patio, each with a glass of wine in their hands, the baby monitors on next to them.

"Al?" Olivia asked, turning to look at her wife.

Alex only continued, eyes closed, a slight smile on her face. She had had her share of Chardonnay and they were just relaxing, listening to the sounds of their babies breathing and the ocean waves in the background. "What?" Alex finally answered.

"I feel good knowing you're gonna be with three people that can help you."

Alex's eyes opened then. "Do you? Do you feel good, Liv? Because I hope you do feel good about this." She looked at her straight-on then, unwavering.

But Olivia was far from sure.

She took another sip from her wine and leaned her head back.

God, she was conflicted. Part of her wanted to proceed with this undercover operation. The other part of her wanted to call and tell Cragen that it was off. To find someone else. "You'll have a lot of help…" Olivia added, watching the blonde.

"Yes...I'll have help, but don't you think the kids need their mother?" She closed her eyes again, leaning her head back on her Adirondack. "What about when Theo asked, when he squeezed your cheeks tonight and said, 'Mama OK?'"

Olivia thought back to that moment after dinner. Their son had been uneasy, questioning his brunette mother's mood. He sensed something, and it was no wonder. Their children always seemed to sense something whenever anything was going on.

And she knew this, but tried like hell to put it aside.

"You know what would be nice, Liv?" Alex's voice was soft.

"What, Babe?"

"If you could just forget about this. Just stay here with us and relax and we could all go back to the city in a couple of weeks."

Olivia swallowed the small amount of Merlot in her mouth. "That would be nice."

Alex looked at her then. "So, make it happen, Olivia. You know you have the power."

They only watched each other then.

Alex laughed lightly, closing her eyes and returning her head to the back of her chair. "But I know you won't."

Olivia took a deep breath then, letting it out.

"Right?" Alex asked.

Olivia looked at her again before saying softly, "Right."

Alex laughed lightly again, "That's what I thought."

12:06 a.m.

Olivia felt a weight on top of her. Her wife was kissing her neck, pulling her chemise down to pleasure her breasts, her hand on her crotch. The brunette felt fingers now, inside of her and she moaned.

"Uhhhh, Alex." She lifted her face to the ceiling, the intrusion pleasurable, yet invasive.

Alex continued, her hand working against her, those long, slender fingers entering her intermittently, panting.

A thrusting now. Urgent. Alex's labored breaths against her face.

"Alex…" Olivia managed.

The blonde only continued, her fingers now making entry once more.

But something was off. The blonde wasn't even trying to seduce her. She wasn't even trying to get the brunette ready with all the things she knew Olivia would like. She wasn't making this a physical luring that Alex knew so well how to do. This was sudden. This was frantic.

This was desperate.

Instead, she was plunging forth, regardless of what her wife was feeling physically.

"Alex…" Olivia tried once more, shoving her wife's hand away. "Please stop."

They looked at each other in the dimness of the room, both breathless, both questioning.

Alex moved to lay back onto her pillow, looking up at the ceiling. "I can't, Olivia," she whimpered.

Olivia swallowed, closing her eyes, and beginning to regain her bearings. "Can't what, Babe? Please talk to me."

And she heard Alex crying now.

"I can't do this, my love. I've been trying to talk to you, Liv. Trying for the past few days, but it seems like nothing I say makes a bit of difference," Alex whimpered.

Olivia only waited, swallowing the gargantuan lump back down into her throat, her eyes filling with tears.

"I need you, Olivia. I need you here with me...doing this together..."

Olivia turned her head to find her wife's body shaking, her face contorted.

"I need you to do this with me. To be with me."

Olivia rolled over onto her left side and took her wife into a hug, the blonde reciprocating. "I know, Al. I need you, too."

They held each other now, the brunette waiting until her wife stopped shaking.

And within moments, she heard her wife's gentle breathing, her body having succumbed to sleep.

She took a deep breath, still holding her wife, and let it out slowly. She wanted her wife to be at ease. But she knew now that Alex was taking this hard. Harder than she ever thought.

And that it was tearing the brunette apart, as well.

A/N: I know it's hard to watch our ladies like this but trust me, I have a positive plan for this! :)