Author's note: Hey guys! The first extra of "From mother and daughter to lovers" is now officially out! Enjoy! Also, take in mind that different extras have different settings and time. So, unless I state it, consider the time and place different from the previous chapter. And, let the fun begin for chibi Shizuru is here!

Summary: It's complicate, especially when the one you are in love is your mother. Shizuru remembers her childhood experience with her feelings for Natsuki. This Shizuru is the one before the amnesia. Events mentioned take place in between chapter 4 but after chapter 3.

Disclaimer: I don't own Mai Hime, Mai Otome, Mai Hime destiny. The plot is mine. Just that thing. I don't own Magnus…he is property of ChieH xD

It's Complicated, Part One

I didn't know what it meant back then. I was just ten years old. A child. Innocent, naïve and ignorant of anything but my own selfish needs.

"We won't go to the zoo tomorrow!"

"But…but –!" I whined, annoyed at they way things had turned out.

"No buts!" Natsuki shook her head, a finger already pointed at me. "That's what you get for making a mess when I wasn't here."

I looked at the living room and pouted. It wasn't that bad. My mother was just exaggerating. A couple of my stuffed animals here and there. A few 'Shizuru was here' signs written on the walls. It was crayon. Some water or paint might do the work. And oh my, my precious tea dried on the carpet. Then I winced. The broken lamp. It wasn't what really made Natsuki mad.

I shuddered. The mere thought of it disgusts me. It was THAT. The now broke mayonnaise bottle.

"My poor, poor mayo."

I bit my bottom lip. Was she really crying over that disgusting thing? Seriously? Back then I couldn't believe it. And I still don't.

"You're sleeping on the couch." Natsuki said, glaring at me.

"But I–"

She shook her head and stood up, leaving behind her precious mayonnaise. She soon disappeared from my view as she went into the kitchen. It seemed this was the end of the conversation and any hope for forgiveness.

I dropped my head and stared at the floor. It was then when I felt it. That strange sensation on my chest. It was painful. Heart aching. And I hated it every time it happened.

"Shizuru can you…" Natsuki trailed off as she stared at her daughter. "Shizuru…"

"I'm sorry…" I said between sobs, my tears not stopping even if I wanted. "I'm really sorry…I didn't want you to get mad. I…" this time, I tried using my arm to wipe the tears off. But it didn't really work.

I kept crying and apologizing even as Natsuki came and wrapped her arms around me.

"Shush, hush now." She gently soothed me, one hand already stroking my hair. "Let it all out, that's right. Just let it all out."

It was an hour later before I stopped crying. By that time, Natsuki had forgiven me and pampered me like a princess. Mind you, I loved it when she spoiled me, especially when we took our baths together. But, secretly I had my doubts. I was afraid. I didn't want that painful reminder back.

"Stop thinking about unnecessary things, Ru." She scolded me when she saw my frown.

I looked away and apologized, "Sorry."

I then cried out when she threw a buckle of water over me. Natsuki scoffed and began washing my hair as if nothing had happened.

"Don't say it, just don't do it again." I nodded, once again enjoying her pampering. "We will go to the zoo, so no watching that late night show of yours."

"But! But it's a new episode of Bones!" I pouted when her respond was a glare. "Ikezu…"

Natsuki shook her head and mumbled, "There is really something weird about you watching that show. Why can't you just watch Barney?"

I gasped, my mouth wide open as I stared at my mother. "You must be joking right?" I demanded.

She just laughed and shook her head again, choosing this time to ignore the challenge. I shrugged. It was fine. Another time then.

"I have such a strange daughter…"

"You are one to talk, mother."

Unlike fairy tales, it didn't start with butterflies on my stomach. It didn't start with a joyful feeing either. No. The first sign that my feelings might be different from others started with that agonizing throbbing in my heart. It hurt so much that I wanted to cry out and tell Natsuki about it. But I couldn't. I didn't know why. My childish mind didn't understand it back then.

I know now.

I was trying to deny my feelings. Part of my body, my mind didn't want to accept these feelings. And that's why it took me so long for me to realize them.

Just like that time when I first experienced what jealousy meant.

It was just another day of 'Take your daughter to your job'. It started very simple, only to end with one of my first experience of what it meant to love someone.

"Puppy!" I squealed and chased after the small and cute animal. "Puppy!"

I stretched my hand as I kneeled in front of him. The many visits to my mother's shop had taught me to always let the animal make the first move. The puppy watched me for a few more seconds before leaning in and sniffing. A giggle escaped my lips when the puppy licked my hand.

"Such a cute puppy…" I mumbled and used my free hand to pet his head. "A very cute and good puppy."

"Shizuru…"

I winced. I knew that tone. It said 'stop it, or else'. But I couldn't help it. I am a dog lover and the puppy was really cute. It was soft and kept making these really cute noises. I wanted to hug and never let it go.

"But he reminds me of Natsuki so much!" I teased, knowing the effect it would have on my dear mother. "Don't you think so, puppy?" I grinned when the dog let out a quiet bark. "See? He agrees."

I always pushed Natsuki's limits. I was, after all, a spoiled brat and she was at fault too.

"Shizuru!"

Uh oh. She growled. That was bad. I looked up and winced again. She was glaring too.

"It's fine." The puppy's owner said, a soft smile adorning her face. "Magnus enjoys the company."

"I am really sorry," Natsuki gave me another glance before looking at the woman next to her, "She usually isn't like this."

Magnus's owner just laughed, not minding the attention I gave to her puppy. Soon, the two disappeared from my view. I supposed they were back to Natsuki's office.

"Don't worry puppy, your mommy is just talking big important and complicate stuffs with mine." It seemed that explanation satisfied him. "Come on, I think my toys are still around here."

I grinned, pleased when I found a small ball. The puppy expressed the same sentiments when I saw it moving its tail from side to side. Magnus then went after the ball and began munching it.

"Such a cute puppy."

As if he had heard me, Magnus looked up with a paw on top of the ball. His eyes wide and giving me that adorable puppy look. I giggled and approached him.

"You are really cute, just like Natsuki." His ears stood up as the tail wagged faster after my praise. "You are very smart, Magnus."

The puppy barked in agreement and used it's head to push the ball toward me. I patted his head one more time before throwing the ball. For a couple of minutes we continued playing the same game. Me throwing the ball and puppy doing his best to catch it as fast as he could.

That's until Mayo's high pitched voice interrupted our playtime.

"It's the true, Shion-chan!"

"There's no way Natsuki-san…"

"I saw them together the other night!"

I tilted my head and stared at the door in front of me. Magnus soon doing the same when he saw I wasn't paying him attention.

"It's completely normal for two women to dine together, you know."

I knew eavesdropping wasn't right but it was about Natsuki and another woman. When had Natsuki gone to a date? I blinked, remembering that night when Mai had come to babysit me. So it was then? My brows furrowed. Natsuki said it was a business meeting with the hacker Kikukawa. Not a date. It wasn't a date. Natsuki would never lie to me.

Then I heard a sigh from, I guess, Shion when Mayo insisted otherwise.

"They were on a date! A date!"

"Mayo…"

"It was the same restaurant we went last week! They were there, eating and laughing! It must have been a date!"

Their voices soon faded away, leaving me alone with Magnus. The puppy whined to get my attention. It tilted his head when I gave him an awkward smile. Before I knew it, Magnus was already snuggling his head against my leg.

"Thank you." I said, knowing he meant well.

Unlike last time, the feelings I experienced weren't that painful. They didn't make me cry. They made me want to find this Kikukawa woman and rip her head off.

"Ara…"

It was in that moment, when I felt jealousy. The simple thought of this woman getting close to my Natsuki. This woman that might have gotten who knows what kind of gentle treatment from my dear summer princess. It made me mad and afraid.

One half of me wanted, without a doubt, to torture her. To make her suffer. To cause her an immense amount of pain for trying to steal my Natsuki. Make her regret for trying or thinking she had a chance. I wanted throw her to a bottomless hole and never be found.

Magnus whimpered, feeling my killer intent. But, I was as surprised as he. This rage against someone that had helped us was strange. It was so new. That I really didn't know what to think.

And then, just as the rage had come, this dreadful fear took over me.

What if it was really a date? What if they had enjoyed their dinner? What if Natsuki had fallen for this woman? What if she left me? What if she no longer loved me? What if?

I shuddered, thankful when Magnus comforted me with a lick to my hand.

"Ara, what a good puppy." I praised him and did my best to forget those horrible feelings. "You really are like my Natsuki."

"As much as I like that dog, I really don't want you to start thinking of me as one."

Magnus barked happily and rushed to her owner. The two women then exchanged respective goodbyes. I don't remember if I had done the same. Back then, at that moment, I didn't care.

"Natsuki…" I called, slowly approaching her. "Natsuki."

She blinked when I lifted my arms but soon understood its meaning.

"Aren't you acting like a brat today?" she teased me as I wrapped my arms around her shoulders. "Shion was right, I spoiled you too much." She then groaned, shifting my body to adjust my weight around her arms.

"I'm ten….there's an unwritten rule that allows me to act like a spoiled brat."

Natsuki chuckled and said nothing. She knew I was acting a bit strange. After all, words weren't needed between us when it came to this type of things. It was strange but I held it as evidence of our special connection. I cherished it with my life as much as every second I had with Natsuki.

It wasn't until we left the shop, letting Mai close it this time, that I dared to ask her about her 'date'.

"Huh?" she gave me a look that said 'are you nuts?'. "I told you, it was a business meeting."

"Mayo thought otherwise…" I mumbled back, pouting when she just arched an eyebrow.

"…And Mayo can be trusted because…?"

I said nothing and went back to put my head over Natsuki's neck. Secretly, enjoying her scent and warm that it gave me. She laughed, not really understanding what was going in my mind.

"Silly, silly girl," she teased me and I decided to look up. "Haven't I told you? I don't need anyone besides my Ru-chan."

Natsuki's smile was never more beautiful than in that moment and her words. Those simple words made my heart beat unlike any other time.

I felt loved. I felt wanted. So many emotions of joy mixed in one. Not even thousand words could ever describe how I was feeling. All that hate, all that fear. It vanished in a second. All because of that simple gesture of love she kindly gave me, even if she did it unconsciously.

When I remember those words and her smile, I knew why I kept fighting. Why, each time, I smiled back. Day by day, trying my best to make her happy. To make her not regret ever loving me. To make myself a woman worth of her love.

I was unaware of it, but that was the first sign. The start of when I began falling for the woman I called mother.

"My arms are dying, my dear daughter."

"I don't care."

"Are you trying to kill me?

"Maybe…"

Some people might say that it was easier when I was a child. That, our happiest moments, were during that time. A time when neither of us were aware of the extent of our feelings. Maybe they are right. Maybe they aren't. However, the truth is that my first eight years were the best.

It wasn't really love at first sight. But it became love in the end. I fell for Natsuki and she fell in love with me. We both fought for our relationship to work. We stood against the cruelty of society, against its laws, against everything that said that what we had was wrong.

I know that we will win because I love Natsuki and she loves me. In the end, there will be a way for us to work it out. Society be damned.

At that time, I was just ten years old. I was a naïve child. A spoiled brat. But, no matter what others said, I did love her. I will always love her.

It was not wrong. It was not a sin. It was just love.

And, yes. Maybe it's complicated.

Omake:

Chibi Shizuru: Ooooh! –Looks at another website- Aaaahh!

Natsuki: -blinks- Shizuru what are you watching?

Chibi Shizuru: Eh? You can do that?!

Natsuki: -panics- Shizuru!

Chibi Shizuru: -sighs- -looks at Natsuki- yes?

Natsuki: what are you watching or reading?

Chibi Shizuru: -innocently- just girl-on-girl action

Natsuki: oh…wait WHAT?! –Takes the laptop away-

Chibi Shizuru: Ikezu…

Author's note: Little Shizuru might do that…like, really do it if she were given the chance. Thank god she is a fictional character…Anyway I just love one-shots! Or extras if you want to call that. And you know why? Because I don't need to care about the backstory! You guys already know the general stuff, so all I have to do is add whatever I please –well not really…- and further explore Shizuru's and Natsuki's relationship with each. What I really like is that I can change the point of view, settings and time. Heh, well. What did you think? A good mixture between fluff and angst?

Updates are on my profile.