Author's note: Here I am with a new update, finally. I decided to make this a multi chapter and not just a two-part story, since I feel like you guys deserve more frequent updates. This is a pretty short one, yet still I very much hope that you guys will enjoy it. I currently have so many one-shot ideas too, and I can not wait to both write and post them. Thank you again for the support!
Chapter 2:
Lexie Grey was pushing her way through the busy hospital corridors, walking so swiftly to the point where she thought her legs were going to lose balance, trying her best to arrive to her desired destination, OR. 2, as soon as possible.
The previous hour or so - it has been...She can't even explain her feelings, actually. It's like her world was collapsing for hours and hours in preperation- and now - everything felt so right. Everything was in its right place, she felt - she felt as if, finally, something was gonna be okay. She was gonna be okay...Her and Mark - it was finally the way it was always supposed to be. They were gonna be okay.
And it felt unreal. It still felt as if she was dreaming. The elevator stopping as abruptly as it did, the little chocolate bar they shared - him making her say that embarrassing speech all over again - just so he could end up telling her that, indeed - he loved her too.
And, now what? They were - back together?
She didn't even recognize how she should put it in words. He was still - with Julia...kinda. So...what happens next?
"He did ask me on a date, though..." Lexie thought silently, still not recovering from the previous events.
But still - this was no time to think about that.
Her surgery.
Her solo surgery.
That's what she should focus on, that's what she should be thinking about.
It was Lexie's moment. Her first solo surgery - well, when it comes to the specialty she is currently focusing on, and hopefully, the one she will stick with till the very end. It was her moment to show Derek how much she has learned, how much she improved, and how deserving she is of this wonderful opportunity he is offering her.
There was no place for mistakes. No place for - thinking about Mark, about everything that happened - about the way he...kisses her cheek whenever she feels nervous or agitated -
No.
Definitely not.
She's doing this. And she's not just doing this, she's nailing this.
Lexie Grey is saving a life in just a matter of minutes. There's no place for distractions.
Just...her and the scalpel. Nothing more, nothing less.
.
"Oh - there you are." Lexie exclaimed happily, noticing Derek in the scrub room of O.R. 2, patiently awaiting for her arrival.
"Look, I am sorry it took so long, it's just -" She laughed to herself, reminiscing about everything that has happened in this short amount of time "-you won't believe what just happened, I-"
"You know, you probably should have postponed the sex for after your surgery, Little Grey. Don't you think?" Derek spoke in a rather calming voice, making Lexie's cheeks blush in an instant, not believing the words leaving his mouth. "I mean, sure, I am a miracle worker for getting you two back together, but seriously?" He told her, as if talking to himself for a single moment, questioning his best friend's ridiculous decisions. "Couldn't you guys wait a few hours before you got back at it? Sure, it's almost been a year, but - the on-call room? Really?I will never understand you two." An unexpected warmth flooded through Lexie's body, her eyes darting around and her cheeks getting redder by the second, embarrassment obvious within her actions.
"I - I didn't..." Derek glared at her, not believing a single word,as Lexie cut in, unable to help herself. "I swear I didn't, c'mon Derek, I wasn't - we weren't-" She wrinkled her nose as her mouth turned downward, her cheek still as pink as the candy she loved back when she was a little girl.
"You weren't?" Derek eyed his sister-in-law seriously, still bewildered by her statement.
"No!" Lexie yelled back, trying her best to take a breath and calm herself down, annoyed by Derek's words. Her arms flew in the air as she said so, honesty clear within her embarrassed voice.
"Then why were you taking so long to get here?" He asked her all of a sudden, thinking about all the reasons that could have caused the resident's unexpected delay.
"Because, for your information-" she started, catching her breath. "-I got stuck." Lexie snapped at him, anger overwhelming her.
Derek glared at her, confused beyond explanation.
"Yes, I got stuck in that elevator you left me in." She then pushed forwards, holding onto the scrub sink.
"You got stuck? Mark and - you?" Derek questioned, laughter slowly crawling up his spine.
"Yes! We got stuck, we were stuck for like half an hour, maybe even more."
"I can't believe you actually got stuck..." He spoke rather surprised, his arms crossed over his chest, as be paused and stared down at her. "-my plan went even more perfectly than I expected." He told her enthusiastically, once again acting like a know-it-all. He smiled widely, letting her know that this was exactly what he wished to accomplish all along.
"Oh, please, a plan?" Lexie scoffed and glared up at him menacingly. "That plan was - very annoying." She muttered by way of explanation, stuttering and uncertain when it comes to her words.
"So - Mark and you are -not back together?" He called, not able to keep track with anything she was saying in the last couple of minutes.
"That's - that's besides the point..." She stumbled upon her words, uncertainty still very much visible.
"Oh, so it worked, didn't it?" Derek smiled briefly down at her before she could get too angry, amused by his own actions.
"I didn't - say anything about that..."
Lexie smiled a little at his words too, not able to hide it any longer.
"It worked. Oh, it definitely worked." Derek exclaimed, finally discovering everything only by the look in her eyes.
"I -" Lexie started, thinking about any usable excuse. "Listen, I have my surgery." She landed on."-I - I have my surgery, my aneurysm...that's the only thing we should discuss in this OR. Dr. Shepherd, don't you agree?" She questioned, acting as any true professional would, her arms crossed over her chest.
"Yeah, because you want to avoid talking about you and Mark." He mocked, rolling his eyes.
"I -..." She stuttered, yet once more, his statements bugging her with such annoyance. "I didn't say that- we..." Lexie continued. "Mark and I, I won't discuss it with you, especially not now. My surgery. All I will do is - I will focus on my surgery."
"You will speak sooner or later. It's all a matter of time." Derek spoke as she was entering the OR, knowing about the fact that she would easily slip up in the end.
"Shut up!" She waved him away, moving as far as allowed from his interrogating.
...
"Well, did you -" Derek tried, interrupted before even finishing his sentence.
"Yes, Derek. I double checked it. You can stop asking." Lexie cut in, sighing, already annoyed by the pressure Derek was putting on her. She was trying to focus. The patient was there, already sedated, and she was doing her best. She worked quickly yet efficiently, fully confident in what she was doing - yet someone, seemed to want to interrupt that wonderful inner piece Lexie has created for herself with every chance he got.
"I'm just trying to make sure-" He tried once more, his words getting lost halfway.
"Make sure? Make sure of what?" Lexie snapped at him, a little harsher than she previously intended to, his interrogation making her even more nervous than she was in the first place. Couldn't he let her do this in peace? Isn't that what he was supposed to do, all along?
"I was-"
"Do you not trust me on this?" Lexie turned her head back, facing her brother-in-law and looking him straight in the eyes, still pissed off at his sudden behavior. He should be the mind of reason over here. He is the attending. It shouldn't be me, but him. Can't he just let me do this, alone?
"What? Of course, I do. It's just that-" He started. "I want you to succeed - that's all." Derek assured her, letting her know that it was all okay.
And it really was. He trusted Lexie. She is most probably, the best resident he has ever worked with. She was amazing, she was made for neurosurgery. He could see it in her, in the way she worked, in how much she has learned in a very short amount of time...She is quick on her feet, and that is definitely what he likes most- he is not just saying that because she is his sister, either. She was always such an amazing student. All he wished for is - he wished for her to succeed. To do this right.
"Well, if you are not sure that I will succeed, why give me a solo surgery in the first place?" Lexie sighed, continuing her work, currently doubting all the encouraging words Derek had previously told her.
You are ready, Lexie. I know you are. It's your time to shine, Little Grey.
"It's your time to shine, my ass." Lexie thought bitterly.
"I - I didn't mean it like that." Derek stumbled upon his words, never wanting for what he said to be interpreted the way she just did. "You can - keep going, I will shut up. I promise. You can do this, I know that."
"Thank you." Lexie spoke with a smile, grateful that they were on the same page. "Because I can do it." She told him all of a sudden, adjusting her mask once more, feeling as it was a little looser than usual. "And don't dare say a word." She warned. "I am capable enough, just trust me and stay put in that chair unless I say that I need you." Lexie finished, moving her focus back to her hands and the next thing she was about to do.
"Well, it's a big day Little Grey. I'm just trying to make sure you can handle this." Derek broke out, still astonished by the tone she used on him.
"Of course she can handle this." A husky voice could have been heard from behind, making Lexie's skin stand on edge, recognizing it in an instant. An affectionate smile broke out under her mask, as she immediately stopped in what she was doing, yet still not turning around, remembering where she was and what she should be focusing on.
He came.
She thought happily, continuing her work and trying her best to forget about the presence of that certain person behind her, a smile not removing itself away from her blushed face.
"Mark?" Derek called, slightly surprised as well. "What are you doing here?"
"Observing." Mark bluntly announced, going straight into the point without even a second of hesitation. He propped himself up against a near wall, his arms crossed over his chest, as his eyes swiftly darted over Lexie's back and a part of her that has been facing him.
"Observing?" Derek asked. He crossed his arms over his chest as well, looking up at his best friend, noticing the way his eyes didn't leave Lexie's busy figure for even a second.
Observing? That is more than just "observing".
"Yes, Shepherd, observing." Mark broke off, as if without a single care in the world, wanting nothing more than for Derek to just shut his big mouth. "- are you not familiar with the term?" He mocked, staring him down for a single second, before turning his gaze back to Lexie and her, very much, focused self.
What he didn't know though, was the fact that the sudden conversation between the long-time brothers, was most definitely bothering her. Lexie was glad that Mark came. Even more than glad, actually - she was so happy that he took the time just in order to come and give her support, to let her know that he is there for her- she loves him for that -yet still...some silence would really help.
"Oh, you know what I meant." Derek fought back, annoyance already evident within his tone.
"Actually..." Mark started. "I don't."
"Mark, I am serious."
"They are still talking? Why are they still talking? " Lexie thought to herself, scoffing, trying to give them even the slightest of clues about the fact that their behavior has been bothering her.
"Well, I am serious too." Mark stated quickly "I promised I'll be here, so I am here okay? I won't bother, if that's what you're so worried about."
"Just be quiet already, I am trying to clip this damned thing." Lexie thought to herself, yet once again, her mouth dry and her muscles tense.
"Promised?" Derek asked, confused. "Lexie..." He tried. "- you told him to come?"
"Shut up!" Lexie lashed out, her heart rate increased and her jaw clenched. Enough was enough. She has been preparing herself for days. She was ready, she was confident - this was her moment. And they are ruining it.
"Can you - can you two just shut up already?" She yelled, turning around and placing her hands onto her hips.
Both Mark and Derek were taken by surprise, yet both listened whatsoever.
"There is a patient lying on this table right now, that I am responsible for. So, please-" She spoke, adding a smile at her last words, not wanting to sound too harsh. "Just be quiet." She finished, taking a breath she didn't even realize she has been holding onto all along.
"Do you..." Mark started, quite intimidated by her sudden lash out. "-want me to leave?"
"What, no-" She quickly let out, sighing yet one more time.
The last thing she wanted was for him to leave. He should stay there - they both should.
But they should definitely leave those personal matters for later, as well.
"You - you stay there." She assured him. " Just...just please, be quiet." She begged, biting her bottom lip, as all she wished for was to go back to the actual work itself.
The two attendings eyed eachother, before silently agreeing with her. No matter how stubborn they both were, they understood what Lexie needed at the moment. So they nodded, allowing her to proceed.
"You got it." Mark spoke, giving her a smile that could have easily been seen even under the mask he was wearing, finally allowing Lexie to calm down.
"Thank you." She murmured, turning around, grateful that they were all on the same page.
Okay. Where were we...
.
And it was finally done. After about 2 more hours, Lexie had successfully completed her surgery, proud and pleased with what she has accomplished.
And it felt so astonishing. Nothing can compare.
The adrenaline, the danger, the fact that she was in control of everybody in that OR...it was unquestionably a one to remember.
It felt so amazing - how much she has learned in the past couple of years, all leading up to this very moment.
She didn't require Derek's help at all. She had done it all by herself.
She was the surgeon in that OR. Lexie Grey was the one in charge - and having Mark there, right behind her, cheering her on - that felt even greater.
There was a moment... maybe even just a second, a split second when everything suddenly became a blur. Her mind went blank, and she felt as if she couldn't move her hands. She even already had a picture of a dead person under her actions. She just froze completely.
She then looked up at Derek...
No, there was no way she was going to disappoint him. She had to pull herself together. She had to.
"I'm proud of you..." a sudden voice whispered from the back of her mind and she then remembered... the voice, the person who told her that... he was still standing right behind her at that very moment...He was there, still put in his place, watching her every move.
She was gonna do this.
She took a few seconds to herself, trying to breathe and relax. You can do this. You're an amazing surgeon. You can do this.
And then she turned around, catching a small glance of Mark, looking as handsome as ever, even in the scrubs he was wearing-
She just smiled to herself, and suddenly - she was back at it, saving a life, all on her own.
She waved Derek out of the room, scrubbing her hands one more time and leaning against the nearest cool-tiled wall. She sighed deeply, tired beyond explenation.
"You nailed it." Lexie smiled as she heard his voice address her, before she could even raise her eyes from the floor. Her feet instantly guided her into his arms.
She lifted her hands and tugged his neck, a hand gripping each side, pulling his face close to hers. His hands instantly found their way to her hips. She then pulled away slightly, she pressed her cheek against his chest and felt his arms encircle her, holding her close to his heat, close to his heart.
"I am so proud of you, Lex. You were a rockstar in there." He exclaimed, his voice deep yet happy.
Lexie laughed against his chest. "You think so?" she mumbled as his arms squeezed her gently before releasing their hold on her body. She took two small steps away from his frame; close enough to grasp his hand lightly.
"Yeah - you were perfect." Mark told her, mindlessly brushing his thumb back and forth, across the back of her hand.
"Thank you for coming..." Lexie shivered as the movement shot sparks up her hand and through her entire body, yet she managed to find her voice and continue. " I don't know what I would have done without you in there with me. Really. You made me -" She trailed off, in an attempt to explain "-made me feel so much more confident in what I was doing and...thanks. Thank you for that." She let the words sink in into the silence of the room, staring into the eyes of the man she loved so deeply, and waited for his reply.
"I'm sure you would have been amazing either way. I didn't do much." the attending stated, pulling her hand so she had to take another two steps closer to him. He then moved his hand up, at the height of her forhead, stroking her bangs tenderly, his touch igniting the deepest of feelings within her.
"No, Mark seriously..." Lexie Grey started yet another time. "It helped. Trust me - it helped." She repeated her previous words, sighing at the end. "You have no idea how much."
Even if she wanted to, even if she tried she couldn't tear her eyes away from his; she could never tear his heart away from his. It was all coming back now, in a force harder than she could have ever imagined, she was so in love with this man, so in love it hurt.
He looked back at her; the same, dazzling tenderness shown within his baby blue eyes.
"Well, if you wanna give me that much credit-" he said simply, or maybe mockingly, in a way. "-then I sure don't mind it." He joked, his hand slowly landing onto her delicate cheek.
Lexie laughed, settling once again in his arms. It was so warm - being so close to him. She missed it. She missed him.
"I texted Julia..." Mark then told her, immediately noticing the uneasiness as she backed away. "She- we will talk in about half an hour. She said that she will be here soon." He spoke, still not letting go of the tight grip on her palm, her smile slowly fading away.
"Are you-" Lexie bit her lip, nervous and agitated by the sudden change of subject. She knew he had to do this - it just felt like she was ruining Julia's life, somehow, even if that might be an exaggeration of what she has done. "Are you sure that you don't want me to come with you? For support - if not for anything else..." She asked softly.
"No - I told you already. You don't have to." Mark once again wrapped his arms around her, trying to make her feel the immensity of his love.
"Are you really sure? Like - like completely sure that you don't need me there, with you?" Lexie asked desperately, trying to keep her voice low.
"Yes, Lexie. I am completely sure that I don't need you there with me. Are we clear now?" He raised his head to look her in the eye, but he didn't pull away from her. His arms remained securely wrapped around her waist, and she pressed her body lightly into his, urging him not to let go.
"Yeah, yeah...I guess so-" She whispered quietly, ultimately agreeing with him.
"You're tired. You better get some sleep." He whispered to her. "That's just one more, out of the many many reasons, why you shouldn't come with me." Lexie laughed, her mind racing.
"I guess I will go lay down for a little bit then. I really feel like a mess, anyway." Lexie sighed, shaking her head.
"You aren't a mess." Mark smiled. "You're perfect."
"No, I'm not. I am definitely a mess." She stated simply.
"Okay, whatever. You're perfect to me." The attending smiled down at her sympathetically.
She stared directly into his eyes, the ease of this conversation, the way their bodies melded together, the ease of being with him - it made her feel as if nothing has ever changed.
"Okay, go lay down...And then later, go home and get ready for our date." Mark told her, moving away a little, trying to grasp her full attention.
"We're really going on a date, huh?" Lexie questioned. Everything was moving so fast, it felt as if she couldn't even keep up. She can't even remember when was the last time the two lovers went on an actual date. Three years ago, maybe? It has never really been a habit of theirs.
"Oh hell yeah." He exclaimed happily, now holding the woman he loved by his side, opening the door and stepping out of the small room.
Lexie just laughed at his enthusiasm, remembering that soon - she will have everything she wished for, everything she missed so badly, and everything she longed for - in so...so long.
Reviews are always welcome.