Chapter 4: Shaking Resolve
Later the next day, with the sun waxing away into a kind and comforting orange, Shirou sat alone in his room. Sella was busy with food down the stairs, the scent drifting up to tickle the redhead's nose, whilst Leys' shows reached his ears even through his closed door.
He didn't mind that though. It was…comforting for there to be some sort of noise he could perceive, in the silence he manufactured for himself in the last few days.
The boy slouched in his seat with his left arm laid across his lap, limp. His good hand worked at his computer, fingers moving the mouse as he browsed site after site. Shirou's eyes didn't comprehend the majority of what he saw, the white pages blurring together like an unholy collage.
"Ugh…" he moaned to himself, wiping his forehead and blinking from the invasive rays of the dying sun, "what's going on with me?"
Shirou's right hand reached up and twisted into the sleeve of his still-numb arm. His eyes roamed up and down the limb, fingers jerking like a puppeteer's.
His fingers curled into his sleeve even more as he bit his lip.
It was healed, it was all better and he could move it…mostly. So why was it that just looking at the limb and thinking about it filled the boy with some kind of primal fear?
A dark thought touched him. Was it…related to the Card?
He shut the lid on that line of thought – the images and visceral feelings tied to that memory of pain far too fresh and far too vivid.
Shirou pushed them down and continued his mindless browsing typical of a highschool student. He didn't even think to touch his manga or books; the internet was a far more attractive way of distracting himself as the day went by.
Soon though, through the collection of pages he began to think of something – or rather, he started feeling curious about something. His eyes focused after ages of being blank, his heart reignited by his sudden desire. The sound of a hammer against metal reached him again, far more vivid than in school.
"Huh…" Shirou ruminated on the thought, scratching his face. "Well, couldn't hurt to look it up."
At a snail's pace his searches became far more precise and directed, and soon he was on sites and pages dedicated to one singular topic. Opening up tabs, the boy's eyebrow raised as he looked at all of the information he could get on forging.
"Why am I doing this?" he wondered to himself, the one person he could trust with his experiences. "It's stupid…"
It was stupid looking up such a complicated procedure, yet he did so. It wasn't even practical, but he was seized by a complete curiosity to find out what he could. It was as niche as one could get, but in that eternal moment it seemed…right, in a way.
Maybe it was because of the fight with Lancer. Shirou shivered even now from the memory of that deathmatch, hands twitching uncontrollably. What he had done—no, what the card had let him do had simply been incredible.
He'd felt powerful, pulling those swords out of thin air in a cloud of sparks and fumes. Even if it felt like an illusion, it was real one way or another. And with the level of strength at that time, he'd killed Lancer. Saved himself even from a gorey fate.
Shirou rubbed his face, an embarrassed flush rising up his pale neck. "Damn it…it's just cool."
He thought he was past that middle-school phase too! If anyone learned about it, he wouldn't live it down whatsoever!
A petite knock sounded against his door, dragging him out of his reverie – much to his own gratitude. Sitting up in his chair, wincing as his bones popped, Shirou looked back as his sister poked her innocent self into the room.
"Um, Shirou?" she asked, voice wavering, fingers gripping the wooden entrance, "is it okay if I come in?"
"Sure," he nodded, groaning as he moved his off arm under pressure, the limb still little more than a wet noodle. "W...what's up Illya?"
Given permission, Illya pushed her way into the room, a small but steaming pile of food gingerly held in her tiny arms.
"I brought you a snack," she murmured, cheeks pink, "um… I know it's not too good but I wanted to do something for you."
Shirou smiled and rubbed her head in appreciation, taking the plate into his lap. It wasn't too hot so he didn't scald himself, and he ate quietly. It wasn't as good as his if he was being honest, but there was…something about it that made the boy want to defend it to his dying days.
The utmost heartfelt effort of a sibling to care for her brother. A sibling bond that couldn't be understated.
After he finished munching, stomach not exactly full but very satisfied, Shirou smiled at his sister and pulled her into a tight, grateful hug.
"Thanks Illya, it helps a lot," he murmured into her snow-white hair, smelling of winter flowers and dew. "I mean it."
His sister made a very strange sound—almost like a sheep's bleat—into his chest before pulling away. Her face was as red as a tomato, her fingers curling and playing with her clothes, eyes turned down to avoid his amused gaze.
"S-stop it Shirou, it's not funny," she complained without any real venom.
After a second of admiring how cute his sister was, Shirou went back to browsing and compiling the information his brain was hardwired to. Sensing her impending unease was lifted, Illya raised her head and blinked at him.
"What're you doing?" She shuffled forward, trying to see even as his body shielded his search. "It's not anything weird is it?"
"What? No!" Shirou defended himself without any conviction.
In response, his sister raised a thin but very judgemental eyebrow.
"I'll leave you to be weird, Shirou~" Illya teased with a positively devilish smile, albeit a rather cute one/ "I won't tell Sella either!"
In a haze of white, his sister danced out of the room, the door left slightly ajar behind her. Immediately after Leys poked her head in, blinking like an owl.
Shirou shrugged at her unspoken question and the 'maid' withdrew with a silent motion, door clicking closed behind her.
"Why's Illya taking after Iri?" he wondered, continuing his research in peace. "Seriously…"
It was hard enough for him and his dad to deal with Iri when she was in her mischievous moods – which was to say, all the time. But now with his sister taking on her characteristics? He wouldn't survive a month.
He and his father had bonded against such displays in a familial tie of brotherhood, yet he was now left to the wolves. If his dad came back, Shirou surely would not forget his absence.
The time ticked away, minutes stretching into an hour. Even when the night encroached and the streetlights kindled to life, Shirou continued his search. Soon though, his eyes began to weigh down even though he rubbed them as hard as he could.
A mighty yawn escaped him as he got to his feet, stripping off and getting dressed for bed.
"Yeah, I think that's enough for tonight," he breathed, wincing at his lead-like limb. "It's still like that…"
Lifting his left arm was like lifting a ton, but Shirou did so. Ignoring the strain permeating the entire flesh and bone of it, he turned it over.
The skin looked the same, even if it was a little more brittle, a little emaciated. The bones felt the same even if it looked well-supported. There was nothing he could see that was wrong with the limb. But feeling?
Wordlessly Shirou looked at the lone Card placed on his desk, out of view of anyone but him.
Are there more?
The poisonous thought from before came back in greater force when he gripped the odd card tight and held it up to his viewpoint. The pattern glittered in the night light, though the knight's blade flashed white as he turned it over several times like a beacon.
Shirou had enjoyed a sheltered and privileged life up until a few days ago. He knew deep down that he was far more fortunate than some people—a good family, a comfortable house and great friends—but it felt like a curse almost. Because he wanted to protect them, how could he ever confide in them what had really happened to him?
He couldn't ignore the truth that so terrified him either; that there were more Class Cards than just his and Lancer's, though he had no idea where it had ended up. There were more, which meant—
His spine shook, his heart clamped up and his stomach pushed up its content in a nauseous rush.
Shirou bent over, sweat dripping in gallons as the world swam and swerved around him in a messy kaleidoscope.
If there were more Cards, that would mean more of those…things. Those murderous, horrendous, monstrous things.
In a rush of sharp and angry disgust, Shirou threw the card into his drawer and slammed it shut, thankfully not waking any of the other residents of the house. Shaking without any way to stop, he thrust himself into bed and dragged his sheets over him like a protective cocoon, the warmth keeping out the coldness of his thoughts.
He drifted off, pushing every single thought out of his brain regarding these Cards and the…Servants forged from their power.
Shirou decided he'd go on a walk in the morning. It was his day off after all, and it always helped him empty his mind of a troubled thought.
He very much avoided the thought process of "what's the worst that could happen" in favour of forcing himself asleep, his dreams full of metalwork and swords.
In the face of her almost self-appointed assignment, Gray found herself cloaked in darkness as she stared out at the house the boy lived in.
Standing in an alley to avoid any unwanted eyes, it was quite surprising to see that such a boy, important enough for a homunculus to intervene to save him, lived in a really quite…average home. It had two floors, a small garden and a gate.
Her head tilted as she watched the door open, revealing her target. The red-headed boy with amber eyes wandered out of the gate, staring up into the sky. It was hard from this distance to really pick up what sort of emotion graced his face, but it was something neutral.
The homunculi came out of the house next – and Gray blinked owlishly at not just the one who had confronted her revealing herself, but a second homunculus. Dressed far more properly than the first one, she was looking frustrated and lecturing the boy, wielding her pointer finger like a sword.
"Ihihi, you really are a stalker," Add teased maliciously, bouncing up and down in his cage. "You're takin' after that little bi—agh!"
His teases cut off as his cage whirled around in a flashy circle, Gray swinging it until the Mystic Code could only groan and rest himself. With a bit of satisfaction taken, the hooded girl stayed silent and just observed the family unit.
A little girl came out too who could only be his sister; the same one she had spotted that time. Gray's eyes narrowed suspiciously, clasping her hands together into tight knots.
Now that she had something for comparison, the resemblance between the little girl and the two homunculi was too close to be coincidence. The same shade of white hair and the same colour of ruby-red eyes. There were differences of course, particularly in the face, but the two homunculi had nearly the same faces.
Her head started to hurt as what seemed like a giant conspiracy squeezed it; why were three homunculi in this city?
The boy bent down and rubbed the head of the little girl, who blushed from the contact before moving down the street – towards her hiding place. Gray regretted, as she shuffled backwards, that she had not been closer. She didn't know the boy's name, and for her investigations it would have been prudent to get at least that.
Her heart skipped as the boy walked past without even noticing her. She blinked too as the bright smile he had given the little girl he lived with slid off his face into something…neutral. Not angry or sad, but just plain.
Fright ran down her spine as he continued on his way, staring into the sky like he was looking for something.
Gray licked her lips, tempted to follow after him due to her new assignment. But her feet refused to move, instead forcing her to look over at the trio of homunculi. Drowned in her hood, her eyes picked apart the three of them once more.
In a singular smooth motion the girl withdrew her notebook, packed with notes and citations, from the depths of her cloak. She scratched down everything she had just witnessed for later reference and to compile her notes. Her teacher had always taught her to make notes rather than completely commit something to memory – it stuck better that way.
Homunculi. Boy. Class Card. Fuyuki.
Why?
Her pen tapped repeatedly against the end of the question mark as she continued to watch the three homunculi with hawk-like eyes. The little girl talked to the other two for a while, the more properly dressed one sighing in response, before the girl walked off in the opposite direction to the red-headed boy, skipping as she did so.
That was the question wasn't it? Why were there three homunculi in this city? Her master may have warned her about it, and her skin and stomach crawled in unison at the memory of the priest, but none of that explained this situation.
So reluctantly, she pocketed her journal and jumped after the little girl.
Gray surged from shadow to shadow, never letting the child out of her sight. Not even as her target's posture slumped and she shuffled forward at a snail's pace, or when the traffic lights to cross took an abysmally long time to turn green.
Gray kept up, and kept watching.
"Ugh…" the girl heaved, holding her bag tightly, "why's Rin such a demon?"
A startled breath left the hooded girl at that point, her eyes widening to saucers. Her feet fell from under her for an instant, but she corrected herself.
"Rin…?" she breathed to herself, almost unable to believe what had just reached her ears, "How…"
Now she had to keep on this child's trail. The only Rin that came to mind was, of course, Rin Tohsaka but that brought another why to the scenario – if it was indeed the Rin that Gray was deployed to tail and keep on the straight and narrow…how did this child get involved with her?
Something approaching concern bubbled away in her stomach at a little girl getting involved in the Class Card hunt, before draining away.
The girl wandered through the city slowly, the scenery changing. Gray found herself looking more around at the cityscape too, blinking in wonder at all the new shops that just burst up from the ground as she followed.
Her hideout was deliberately on the edge of the city, away from people for her privacy. It was lonely, but it was the best way to keep herself inconspicuous and unnoticeable.
But there were so many colours it made Gray dizzy. It was just like that department store Reines had talked about, the one that fell under Luvia's administration not too long ago. Her face flamed up in embarrassment as she recalled that particular day.
Even so, in the distance Gray saw a familiar twin-tailed girl dressed in casual clothes. The weight in her stomach became iron and fell down to her feet, preventing her from moving forward even though she strained against it.
"Tch, what took you so long?" Rin demanded of the little girl, tapping her fingers impatiently against her arm. "I've been waiting for a while!"
"Sorry!" the girl apologised, bowing down. "But my brother…"
Rin swept a hand through her hair irritably, face twisting with frustration after blanking with some other indescribable emotion. "Whatever. It's not important at the minute. We have to talk about the Class Cards."
Gray made her notes even though shock ran through her. Even back in London Rin had only been so irritable and annoyed towards Luvia – the two had the ability to mutually annoy each other after all. But with how Rin gritted her teeth and twisted her foot into the suddenly empty street, it was hard to believe Gray had some fond memories of her.
A five pointed star with wings at its side flapped out of the girl's bag, gesturing to Rin with little importance.
"Honestly Rin, you gotta fix that attitude – how else are you gonna get any help?" Kaleidostick Ruby criticised, its artificial voice tinny and teasing.
Raw, pure, unadulterated shock gripped Gray and refused to let go. She shook as she watched Rin swat at the Kaleidostick, the Mystic Code chuckling and darting out of reach. Her fingers didn't move to take down notes, her pen nearly dropping from her ordinarily strong and diligent grip.
The Kaleidostick…it wasn't with Rin?
The Tohsaka had been the one assigned the red one, with Luvia getting Sapphire. It meant that she was meant to fight and claim the Class Cards using their power and varied abilities. But Ruby had clearly darted out of the little girl's bag, as if Rin didn't have a say over it.
Did that mean…something had happened to sever Rin's contract with the Mystic Code? And that as a result, this little innocent girl had gotten involved?
Gray forced herself to take cover around the corner of her perch, holding her journal tight to her chest as if her life depended on it. She didn't sink to the ground—she wasn't like that anymore—but uneasy breaths left her in a stressed haze as her ears prickled at the conversation.
"Look, we've got four Class Cards to get then I won't have to deal with this again," Rin forced out, tone angry. "I won't let that Edelfelt beat me to the prize! Not this time!"
"Ehhhhh?" The girl gaped as Ruby laughed derisively like a jester at Rin. "But…we don't know where they are!"
"We'll just have to keep looking in that case," the Tohsaka grumbled, "that drill-haired…witch probably has something up her sleeve. Gah, I hate this!"
"Well it's your own fault~" Ruby teased, a yelp escaping it as the Mystic Code darted out of the way of what sounded like a Gandr shot. "Hey! I'm just telling it as it is!"
The argument drained away like a muffler had been put around the area as Gray's mind raced at the pace of a mile a minute. Thoughts and feelings were burgeoning inside her, mixing into unholy and devastating cocktails even though she didn't move an inch.
Her brow furrowed as she considered the information, letting out the breath she didn't know she'd been holding.
It was imperative to find out why Ruby was in the possession of the girl instead of Rin, and why from the sounds of it there had been an incident to cause the split. Conflict rose up in her stomach; Gray had a…somewhat good opinion of Rin from her time in London, but to involve a child in something like this?
It was…well, irresponsible. And it was wrong too – Gray had read over the reports of Bazett Fraga McRemitz over the original two clashes with the Heroic Spirits. She had dealt with them accordingly and professionally, but even so…the Enforcer hadn't been able to deny how deadly they could have been to someone who wasn't her.
She should tell her master about this straight away. Run home, phone him and let Rin reap the consequences of her actions. That was why Gray had been stationed here after all. But something stopped her from doing that, even as she leapt and bound away over the rooftops, wind rushing through her hood.
Her experience in the Adra Castle especially had planted in her the knowledge that acquiring all the facts were necessary. She couldn't make a snap judgement out of emotion or duty. Which was why she needed to find out, sooner rather than later, what Luvia's arrangement was. Whether she kept her Kaleidostick and what measures were in place if that wasn't the case.
Making another note as she flew through the air with Reinforced limbs, Gray decided to follow the red-headed boy once more, even just for a little bit. To clear her mind of this shock of information.
She didn't notice how, whilst avoiding Gandr shots, Ruby peered up at her for the briefest of moments before turning back and continuing her taunting.
The walk was quiet, peaceful, and devoid of any other person. No winds cut into his face nor did anyone bump into him, breaking his concentration. It was, purely and simply, a trance of tranquility.
Shirou was exceedingly grateful for the peace.
He journeyed through Fuyuki, mind clouded with thought. Over bridges and through neighbourhoods he knew like the back of his hand he walked, considering the problem that bred itself into his head.
Hand trailing against rails and on fences, Shirou considered the problem he had been thrust into. The situation that he found himself terrified of to the bottom of his heart.
The cards…and those Servants that accompanied them.
The borrowed knowledge from the Card he possessed flowed through his brain, filling in the gaps to the best it could. It was disorienting, but it was enough for him to understand the situation – and completely hate it.
"Those cards…" he mumbled, the town scenery shifting to the field in the centre of Fuyuki, "what do I do?"
That was the question wasn't it? What did he do?
Standing alone, the only source of life in the outskirts of the city, Shirou glanced up into the cloudless sky. No easy answer was bestowed upon him, no matter how hard he wished for it, leaving him and him alone to combat the dark thoughts bubbling up.
It had been euphoric to fight Lancer, and fight to survive. There had been something about wielding weapons like he'd trained with them all of his life – even though it had been tinged with his desire to live.
He wanted to live.
"I'll die if I fight things like that," he murmured the truth to himself, continuing on his distracted walk, "even with Saber…"
His hand clutched the card like a lifeline, the only thing keeping him grounded in this insanity. Just like before he was seized by the idea of tossing the card away and continuing to live his life, but just like before too his hand let go of the card before the thought could pass into actuality.
It was a time like this that he wanted his father to be here. So that he could talk to him, air his grievances, and have him in his worldly knowledge tell him that this poisonous reluctance to fight was okay. That it was normal.
Because even as Shirou continued to think on it all, he found himself nearing the old part of town his father's associates ran, along with the abandoned residence he'd been told to stay away from. But who would stop him staying here to think?
Shirou fell against the railing, sitting against it. The air began to chill, his shaking breaths leaving his mouth in a haze of fog. The boy rubbed his hands idly together, trying to birth a flame, even as he was absorbed in his thoughts.
"It's stupid…" he grumbled, pushing off his seat when the cold was too much to bear. "I'm being stupid…"
He made to walk off, and to banish the thoughts of resentment starting up again as they had so many times since his life started down this unstoppable path. But then, as if by fate, his eyes were drawn to the old building.
And his spine started tingling.
His breath failed to leave him as the card burned in his grasp, scalding the skin a blistered red. Yet it didn't hurt; not even close, despite the way his hand distorted and swelled from the pressure.
An incomprehensible sense of danger filled the air as the boy ambled towards the residence, door barred by wire and wooden planks. It was like, rather than being slated for demolition, someone had decided to lock it away forever.
Shirou's brow furrowed as he considered it. Something rang in the back of his head, as if he knew this place – but that couldn't be right. He'd never been around this area of Fuyuki much if ever, always confined to the area farthest from this.
But above all else, throwing away the deja vu to the curb, he knew deep in his heart what was in that place. What drew him there.
A Card was there. And so was a Servant.
For an infinite stretch of time he stood there, petrified and gaping at the place, the card continuing to singe his flesh and engrave itself into his soul. His amber eyes shook in place, the boy's limbs swaying in shock.
Then he placed one foot in front of the other…and began to walk away.
"It's not my problem, it's not my problem…" he muttered, gripping his forehead tight, "it's not my problem…!"
He had a family and friends, people he wanted to know until his dying day. Why should he stick himself out to fight another Servant? For some suicidal sense of justice? No way.
One step.
He was just a kid, what could he possibly do? It was his choice not to fight.
Two steps.
What was the point anyway? How many cards existed? And why should he spend his life fighting them?
Three.
"Let someone else take care of it!" Shirou hissed to himself, smacking his cheek as his body slowed down.
It refused to move, jammed in place like a statue. No matter his will or desires, Shirou's flesh refused to budge one more single step. As if trying to make him reconsider his choice of life, for one of death.
Yet…
Even if he ran away, he found himself thinking unbidden, would someone else come across the card like he had? Only to die because they didn't have one in the first place?
If that happened…then wouldn't he be responsible for their deaths one way or another?
"That's…" the words he wanted to say left his lips like it was pulling a tooth, "that's not…"
That is not right.
He tried to run. Tried to walk. Tried to make his body move back home so he could forget about it. But images assailed his brain, of innocent people—men, women, children—who came across this exact same place at the exact same time and touched it…only to be ripped apart in red chunks.
His fault. It would be his fault. The possibility made him absolutely sick.
And so, trapped at that crossroads of ideals, his pocket burning and his soul aflame with guilt… Shirou looked back at the residence in resignation and let out a heavy, condemned breath at what he needed to do.
Without saying a single word, he made up his mind, and moved back towards his home, tragic determination in his chest.
Gray said nothing as she watched the boy walk away from the boarded-up house. Once he had disappeared into the distance, she thrust herself out of the shadows. Stepping lightly forward, as if she was afraid of tripping wires, Gray looked at the place.
She shivered as her skin crawled uncomfortably like centipedes, never ceasing. She held herself closer trying to shut out the inexplicable cold, which only served to heat up her suspicions.
But she could feel something else apart from the chill that pervaded her entire being. Something intensely familiar beyond that, like a warning bell going off in her head.
"A Bounded Field…" she spoke at last, walking as much as she could around the cordoned off area. "What's one doing here?"
The residence, from what she could see from her exploration of the area around it, was quite large – larger than most estates she'd seen thus far in Japan. The Bounded Field covered it all, to the very smallest corners and cracks. It felt 'human' in a way, rather than coldly robotic or the unconscious manipulation of others she had seen, but it was still a barrier.
And her teacher had taught her to be very careful of Bounded Fields in general, even ones she was familiar with.
She stopped again in front of the residence's locked door. Gray didn't raise a hand to it, in fear that it would trigger some other sort of alarm. So she was left alone in the empty street to sort out her thoughts.
"Yeah, it's weird," Add commented, for once not insulting her. A welcome change. "We know that twintailed brat is the Second Owner, but we didn't get told about any other magus."
"Yes…" Gray agreed, staring through the cracks into the main area, "but…there's…."
The feeling of walking over her own grave—terrifying and inhuman—washed over her again. Gray retreated into her cloak, though the heavy material did nothing to stave off the stressed thrumming in her chest.
"A Class Card," she forced herself to say, stepping backwards. "One's in there."
It was one of the worst possible situations. A Bounded FIeld she knew to avoid, but given that her senses were screaming at her that a Class Card was in there too? It was an unholy fusion of two messes to make an even bigger one.
One she was afraid to even touch.
"Well if you're too much of a coward to get it," Add spoke up 'helpfully', "you could just let those brats take it. No skin off your back. Or you could step up for once."
The words triggered the return of the memories of her childhood. Of the Black Madonna, of fighting spirit after spirit for training in the ghoul-infested graveyard…of the horrible, overwhelming pain of her face shifting in the night, her pillow the only companion for her experience.
Gray stumbled backwards against the same fence the boy had sat against, breaths heaving out of her lungs.
"I can't do it, I can't do it…" she chanted to herself, head full of fog, "I can't deal with it…"
Add tutted audibly and derisively, not moving an inch in his cage. "You can't? Or you won't?
"Cause that's your big flaw Gray, from what I've seen. You always give up too easily. Hell, I might not like that chainsmoker a lot, but at least he keeps going."
Gray pulled his cage out of her harness, holding him up with a tremorous grip. The Mystic Code's bright eyes locked onto her own.
"How the hell are you gonna get better at anything if you don't try?" he finished, before hopping and turning away from her. "Ihihihi, you really are kinda pathetic."
Nothing more was said, leaving Gray alone with her tumultuous thoughts.
She bit her lip as she didn't budge from her spot, eyes locked on the residence even as the sky started to turn dark and lights flickered on lazily and slowly, hearkening the end of the day.
The fear was overpowering as it was usually, and so too was the terror of what she would find in there. But at the same time, as Add's advice circled her brain and memories pushed up through them…
She remembered.
At Adra Castle, despite how useless she had been in that case right up until the end… she had been entrusted to deal with the greatest threat to the people inside. Even though it terrified her and she was nearly overcome with ghosts, she had fought with everything she had.
And that same person…they had believed in her, despite her own doubts and the doubts of the others in her ability.
She had been put here because she was trusted, because she was the only one that could be trusted to fulfill her duty to the letter and with as much resolve as she could muster. And as a tiny voice that grew louder told her, she wanted to prove she deserved that trust.
To prove that pride in her was warranted…and to be proud of herself instead of locked into self-loathing.
Would her teacher want her to fight the Class Cards? Gray couldn't answer that; her master was somewhat hard to understand at times and a mess of contradictions.
Even so, her fingers clinked idly against the railing, the sense of vertigo disappearing and leaving in its place some kind of nameless determination. A resolve of those who wanted to be better than they were.
But if she didn't fight them, Rin would make that kid fight them – if her suspicions were correct. And it would be the same for Luvia too, as much as she respected and liked the Edelfelt heir as a friend.
For children to get involved in this if she chose not to fight it…she wouldn't be able to live with herself if something happened to that bright and bubbly girl she had caught a glimpse of.
Her brow creased in concentration and she lifted Add's cage to eye level. The Mystic Code barely turned around, but scurried back a little at how her passive features had gained a layer of resolve in them, in the furrowed brow and pursed lips.
No matter how they shook, Add could see something was changing in Gray.
"...I'll fight it," she declared, her voice and frail but undeniably full of will. "I'll fight it, Add."
Add didn't say anything but allowed her to bound away back to her hideout to prepare, nestling himself and thinking about the whole situation.
Gray didn't notice as she passed over Shirou like a crow. The boy's hair whistled her from her speed, and he looked around in bewilderment before continuing to walk home…his own determination burning like a forge.