{September 2nd, 077}
"Lord Hokage, Fox returning for duty," Naruto spoke, kneeling in front of his leader.
"Ah, you've finally returned!" Hiruzen smiled. "I was beginning to worry about you."
"Mission successfully accomplished, My Lord, our only casualty was Egret. He was killed by an elite enemy operative working directly under Yagura. Cat tells me he died to save her life. His remains are here, sir," the redhead reported, handing the old man a scroll. "All other operatives will be fit to return to duty after a period of rest. I recommend two weeks."
"Granted. I'll inform them of their time off," Hiruzen nodded. "So, why don't you start at the beginning? I'm sure you have very detailed reports with you, but give me the highlights."
"Sir!" Naruto nodded. "Upon arrival, Mei Terumi, who is now the Fifth Mizukage, was leading a small group of resistance fighters…"
Naruto gave the highlights of the various important assignments they were given and finally gave the details of his battle with Yagura. "Very good, Fox. Anything else to report?"
"...Permission to speak freely?"
"Of course, Naruto. Please, remove your mask."
"Thanks, Old Man," Naruto gave him a grim look. "I'm afraid...I have some bad news."
"Oh?" he quirked his eyebrow.
"I don't believe Yagura was working under his own will."
"What? Who could-"
"Madara Uchiha. I believe Yagura was put under a Genjutsu by Madara Uchiha to do his bidding within the Hidden Mist."
"..." Hiruzen sat in silence for a moment. "Tell me everything. Spare no details."
"I decided to use Human Path on Yagura in order to gain any insights on why the bloodline purges started, as well as to gain information on any potential threats from the Mist. While I do fully believe that Mei is a leader who can be trusted, gaining additional information is always something to go for if given the opportunity. Once I got through the...atrocities...that he had committed, I came back to a memory. He was alone in what I was the Mizukage's office at the time, or some sort of personal room of his, when a masked figure approached him."
"Masked figure…"
"From the description received from my father, I believe it was the same person," Naruto reported.
"I see...this is very grave indeed…"
"Words were exchanged briefly before I caught a flash of the Sharingan eye and then his memories were hazier. Initially, I didn't realize it, however, all the memories from before the bloodline purges began were far clearer. As if I were the one living them. The memories after the event were more like I was watching them occur, rather than doing them myself."
"Did you inform the Hidden Mist of this?"
"No, sir. I thought it best you decided what to do first."
"Good. Spreading unproven rumors in a restructuring country could prove disastrous. They could also accuse us of starting the bloodline purges, as at the time, we had a large population of Uchiha," Hiruzen nodded, stroking his beard deep in thought. "This is troublesome…"
"Thanks, Shikkaku," Naruto rolled his eyes.
"I'll speak with the council on this further and contact Jiraiya. Perhaps with his spy network, he can get us more information."
"Understood."
"Very well. You did a great job, Naruto. You're dismissed. I don't want to see you here or in your ANBU uniform for at least two weeks, is that understood? I'll send a messenger when you are to return. Understood?"
"Yessir."
"Good. Now, go return to Anko. I'll contact the friends and family of Egret," Hiruzen sighed. "This is always the hardest part of the job."
{Timeskip}
"Anko? I'm back!" Naruto called, opening the door to his house.
"-rruutooooo!" Anko charged towards the door and leaped into a flying tackle, taking the two down onto the ground right inside.
"Oof~," Naruto groaned, hitting the ground with Anko's full weight on his chest.
"Finally! You were gone forever!" Anko beamed at his return. "Come 'ere! You owe Anko some lovin'!"
"I missed you too, Anko," Naruto smiled and pulled her in for a kiss. "God I missed you."
"Mmm...I'll bet you did," she wiggled her eyebrows.
"You know...being in a war...makes you think...about things," Naruto said between kisses.
"Mmmph really?" Anko panted lightly. "What kinds...of things?"
"You...mostly...how much...I love you…"
"Is this...going somewhere? You're...interrupting...my lovin'..."
"Kinda…" Naruto pulled her off him for a moment and stood up. "Hey, Anko?"
"This better be good," she glared slightly. "I was enjoying that."
"Let's get married."
"..."
"..."
"WHAT?!"
"I'm serious," Naruto said flatly.
"THAT'S NOT HOW YOU DO IT, DUMBASS!" Anko yelled, hitting him upside the head. "You don't just declare that shit! You have to ask me and get a ring and shit!"
"I didn't particularly want to wait," Naruto shrugged. "Egret died on our mission. I saw the Fourth Mizukage's memories. I saw people tortured, persecuted, hunted down, and slaughtered like animals. I saw corpses lining buildings like tile. I saw more blood than that day with Itachi could ever bring... I want to marry you. If something happens to either one of us, I want to say that I married the woman I love before I died."
"What the hell," Anko whispered, blinking back tears and sniffing. "I'm supposed to be pissed you did this wrong, dumbass...why you gotta go and say sappy shit like that…"
"Aww, poor wittle Anko," Naruto teased. "Are you crying?"
"I AM NOT!" she yelled back, blushing bright red.
"Don't worry, Naruto's here and he'll protect you."
"FUCK YOU!"
"Gladly, but first, I asked you something," Naruto looked her in the eyes. "I'm serious. I want you to marry me."
"..."
"Will. You. Marry. Me?"
"...yes…"
"Hmm?"
"I said yes, you dumbass! Now fucking kiss me!" Anko smiled with tears in her eyes.
"I'd love to," Naruto smiled back and picked up his new fiancè, carrying her with him so they could celebrate their new status.
{September 20th, 077}
"Well...that's a surprise. Why didn't you tell me, Naruto?" Hiruzen asked, blinking owlishly.
"You kind of ordered me to stay away until you called for me, remember?" Naruto rolled his one visible eye. "Besides, I was spending some much-needed time with Anko."
"Much needed is right," Anko glared. "You're gone way too much, mister."
"It's not my fault! I'm an ANBU captain!" Naruto held up his hands in protest.
"And? I need my cuddle fox here more often."
"Ahem," the Third interrupted with a cough. "I hate to interrupt, but actually, Naruto, Anko is right."
"WHAT?"
"YES!" Anko cheered.
"In fact, that was your last ANBU mission for the foreseeable future," Hiruzen said.
"I-I don't understand, is there something wrong? I completed the mission and Egret was an unavoidable loss, I really am-"
"No, Naruto, nothing like that," he held up a hand, halting the redhead. "I'm honorably discharging you for the same reasons as Kakashi. It's about time you rejoined the regular forces as a Jonin."
"No...you don't mean…" Naruto widened his eyes in horror.
"Exactly," Hiruzen grinned evilly. "It's time that you took a Genin team."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"HAHAHAHAHAH!" Anko broke out into a fit of laughter, falling to the ground onto her knees after a moment. "I...can't...breathe!"
"Hey, shut up! This isn't funny!" Naruto protested. "Lord Hokage, you can't be serious! You know of my...situations! The ANBU is the best place for me!"
"Hmmm, perhaps taking Genin isn't right for you," the old man thought aloud for a moment as Naruto gained a look of hope in his eyes. "Very well, you'll replace Ebisu as Konohamaru's personal trainer then."
"..."
"..."
"I...CAN'T!" Anko collapsed into another fit of laughter. "Aahahahhahahah~!"
"I'll take the Genin…" Naruto grumbled.
"Good," he grinned. "Now, when's the wedding?"
"Anko, get off the floor," Naruto groaned, dragging her back to her feet.
"You're gonna be - Hahaha! - in charge of brats! Hahahahah!" she wheezed.
"Are you done yet?"
"Wooo...just about...ahhh…" Anko panted. "Air…"
"I hate you…"
"Love you too, foxy," she winked.
"Anyway," Naruto sighed. "I was thinking as soon as possible. Unless Anko changed her mind and wants a big event…"
"Nah! I'll let Kurenai and Hana be surprised," she chuckled. "And then I'll make them feel guilty for missing the wedding so they buy me all the dango I want!"
"You know, if you keep eating all that dango, you won't be able to perform your ninja duties anymore," Naruto warned.
"Watch it!" she growled before smirking playfully. "Besides, you know exactly where all the dango goes. Don't you, Naruto?"
"Uh...I...uh...ah…" Naruto sputtered as the purple-haired torture specialist made very sure he could see exactly where the dango went...which just so happened to cause the old Hokage to fall backward with a geyser of blood erupting from his nose. "Oh, dammit, Anko! One of these days you're gonna accidentally kill someone with those things!"
"Noses aren't the only things these things cause to spur-"
"ANKO!" Naruto shouted, turning an even deeper shade of red than his hair. "Old Man? You awake down there?"
"Uh-huh," the old man nodded dumbly, still a bit woozy.
"Alright, up you go, come on," Naruto pulled him back up into his chair.
"Ahem. Thank you, Naruto," the Third cleared his throat in a dignified way.
"Right…"
"So, is that why you're here? You'd like me to perform the ceremony for you?"
"If you could," Naruto smiled at Anko. "I'd really appreciate it."
"Do you have the rings? Oh, right, and I should get a witness..." Hiruzen muttered. "Is Cat ok?
"I've got them," Naruto nodded, handing one box to Anko and keeping the other in his hand. "And Cat will work fine."
"Very well. I have the book here somewhere…" Hiruzen dug around before finding the various papers and things he needed to legally marry the two of them. "Ah! Here they are. Now, let me go fetch her."
"Sounds good, Old Man," the redhead smiled. A short fifteen minutes later, cat stood beside the Lord Hokage while he began to read from a small book.
"Ahem. We are gathered here today...yadda yadda...under the light and guidance of Kami...yadda yadda…" he mumbled, skipping ahead. "Ah, here it is! Please produce the rings."
Naruto started, removing from his box an intricate, golden ring with a fox design encircling it. On the inside of the band read 'By the Guidance of the Sage.' He gently placed the ring on the grinning Anko's ring finger.
Anko removed the one from her box next, removing a very similar golden ring, but this one had a snake design. It had the same engraving on the inside of the band, the two matching quite well. She slipped it onto Naruto's finger once he'd removed the glove.
"Yes, now. Next...let's see here. Naruto Uzumaki, do you take Anko Mitarashi as your lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold, in sickness and in health, til death do you part?"
"I do," Naruto smiled.
"Right, Anko Mitarashi, do you take Naruto Uzumaki as your lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold, in sickness and in health, til death do you part?"
"You're damn right I do," she grinned back.
"Very well. I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may now kiss the bride."
Naruto smiled and leaned forward, kissing Anko gently, as the old Hokage began to fill out the paperwork. "That seemed a little...rushed...don't you think?"
"Nonsense, Cat," he waved her off. "We got the important bits. Now I just need you to sign here and they will legally be Naruto and Anko Uzumaki."
"Wait, why do I have to take your last name?" Anko asked, taking a break from the kiss.
"That's generally how these things work...did you not want it?"
"...mitarashi is my favorite kind of dango…"
"Oh for the love of," Naruto groaned. "Get back over here."
"Well...I'll just leave it as Anko Uzumaki," Hiruzen murmured. "I'm sure they'll figure it out."
"Right…" Cat sweatdropped, but approached the couple anyway. "Um...Captain?"
"Yeah?" Naruto took a break to breathe, looking up at his longtime ANBU teammate.
"Congratulations. I wish you well in your marriage."
"No problem. When's your wedding with Hayate?" Naruto grinned.
"Um…" she flushed red. "We're thinking 075. Maybe the summer?"
"Wait, you're actually engaged?" Naruto's jaw dropped. "Congratulations! I had no idea!"
"Right, well, it was just recently," she said awkwardly. "So, we haven't really told anyone yet. We're not...um...really in any rush."
"Well, I'll tell you what a good friend once told me," Naruto looked at her seriously. "In this life, it is best to find things that bring you happiness and hold on tightly to them. Never let them go, because you never know when you won't be able to hold them again."
"Oh...well, thank you," Cat bowed slightly. "And congratulations again, Captain."
"See you around, Cat," Naruto waved.
"Who said that?" Anko looked at him suspiciously. "Don't tell me…"
"Yeah," he sighed. "It was him. That's why I came home that day and told you I loved you. Because of what he told me. It finally hit home that he was right. Same advice that made me ask you the day I got home from the Mist."
"You're too spontaneous, you know that? Would it kill you to plan something?" Anko chuckled, giving him a warm hug.
"Yeah, but you love that about me," Naruto shrugged.
"Mmm…"
"Well, now that you two are officially married," Hiruzen spoke, interrupting the moment. "I suppose you are allowed to have a two week honeymoon. So...go somewhere and do something. Just be safe. You may be married, but you should at least raise some genin brats before you raise some brats of your own."
"It'll be a while before I agree to stop drinking sake for nine months. I'd say you have nothing to worry about," Anko grinned devilishly. "But we are going somewhere that you can fuck me six ways to Sunday. Got that?"
"Er...right…" Naruto flushed.
"Alright, husband, let's go find us a nice hot vacation spot! Maybe a hot spring, or a beach, ooooh! We can go visit that hot young Mizukage you told me had the hots for you! How about a wedding threesome?" Once again, the elderly Hokage collapsed with a geyser of blood erupting from his nose.
"Anko~!"
{October 10th, 077}
"Did you enjoy our honeymoon, princess?" Naruto asked as the two lay snuggling together in a hotel room on the last day of their honeymoon.
"I thought I told you not to call me princess," Anko hummed, her tone more tired than anything else.
"Did you? I don't recall that."
"Jackass," she grumbled. "I still can't believe we fucked the Mizukage…"
"Anko!" Naruto blushed. "You're not supposed to talk about that!"
"I guess I should have known her mouth would be that hot...I mean, she has lava and boil style kekkei genkai…"
"You're impossible, you know that?"
"Of course I do," Anko snuggled further into his chest. "But are you sure we have to go back tomorrow?"
"Yeah, it's been about three weeks since we left, remember?" Naruto asked. "We spent the first week in the Hidden Hot Springs Village…"
"Mmm...that was wonderful…"
"Then we took a boat to the Hidden Mist since I had a special invite to visit whenever I wanted by Lady Mei," he continued.
"Yeah, you did," she mumbled. "And then you and I double-"
"And we spent time in the Mist," he interrupted, blushing heavily. "And now we're about a day's travel from being back home."
"So...you're really gonna be around more, huh?"
"As much as I can be," Naruto smiled. "No more ANBU."
"That's nice...I'm sorry you lost your position...but...I miss you."
"I know, Anko. I'm sorry I had to leave so much."
"As long as you always come back."
"I'll always come back to you, Anko."
"Did you think about what Lord Third said before we left?" Anko asked, changing the subject.
"What d'you mean?"
"You know...about having kids... You're eighteen now and I'll be eighteen in two weeks…" she trailed off. "Your parents had you at nineteen, right?"
"Well," he mused, petting her hair softly. "I think it's mostly up to you."
"Me? Why is this my decision?"
"I'm not the one who has to carry it around for nine months. I do the heavy lifting for about an hour-"
"Three hours, more if we have the time."
"Whatever…" he blushed. "But then it's all on you. You'd have to take time away from the T&I Department, give up sake for almost a year, and then you'd have to actually have them."
"...ow…"
"I can imagine, yes," he chuckled. "There's no rush, so why don't we just think about it? If you ever decide you want some, or I do, we'll talk about it again."
"What happened to Mr. 'you never know when you might go get yourself killed, so get everything out of the way as fast as you can?'"
"Fair point," Naruto admitted. "But this is different. Those things were with you, this is a whole new life. Last time a new life was being brought into the world that was this close to me…"
"Was your sister," Anko whispered.
"Yeah…"
"Well, I don't think anyone would mess with the big, scary fox."
"Or a hormonal snake princess. Ow!"
"Jackass." Anko rolled her eyes while Naruto chuckled and kissed her again.
"I love you, Anko."
"Love you too, foxy," she grinned. "Almost as much as dango."
"We were having a moment!" he whined while Anko just laughed.
{March 3rd, 078}
"All of you here will be Jonin sensei after the upcoming graduation exam," Lord Third announced, clearing his throat slightly before continuing. "This year, we have a rather special class, which has the inclusion of clan heirs of nearly all major clans in the village. Many of these children will be grouped together, so some of you may have teams consisting of them."
"Yo!" a new voice interrupted. "Sorry I'm late. You see, I accidentally dropped some salt this morning, so I had to take the long way around."
"That doesn't make any sense, Kakashi…" Naruto deadpanned.
"Naruto? What are you doing here?"
"If you were here on time, Kakashi, you'd know that," Hiruzen growled. "Now in line!"
"Yes, sir!"
"As I was saying... Here are the various groupings for teams under which sensei. Team 1 under Genma Shiranui. Shirou…" He continued going through the various names until he'd finished with Team 10. "You all have your teams. Dismissed! Please be at the academy by 1:30 in one week!"
"Hey, Old Man, did you forget Team 9 or something?" Naruto joked.
"..."
"..."
"...Dammit…"
"YOU ACTUALLY FORGOT THE NUMBER 9?!"
"I'M TOO OLD FOR THIS SHIT, NARUTO!"
{March 10th, 078}
"INO-PIG!"
"FOREHEAD!"
"INO-PIG!"
"FORE-"
"THAT'S ENOUGH!" Iruka shouted, utilizing his top secret teacher jutsu, Ninja-Art, Big Head Jutsu, to quiet his class down. "Everyone be quiet and take your seats!"
"Hn," Sasuke grunted, turning his head away from the two females that were fighting for the chance to sit next to him.
"Alright, class, if you're here that means you successfully graduated from the academy! Congratulations!" Their teacher, Iruka, beamed with pride. "Each of you has done a fantastic job and will someday make amazing shinobi for the leaf."
"Get to the point already!" Kiba shouted.
"Arf!" his ninja dog, Akamaru, yipped in agreement.
"You must be patient, Kiba," Hijiri told him. "Be more like the fire. Fire waits for its opportunity-"
"WOULD YOU SHUT UP ABOUT FIRE!"
"BOTH OF YOU BE QUIET!" Iruka shouted again. "As I was saying, since you've graduated, it's time to be given your teams! Each team is composed of a total of four members; three Genin and one Jonin sensei. These Jonin will continue to be your primary resource in development for your foreseeable future and even if you become Chunin and Jonin yourselves! Take Lord Fourth for example. When he was still alive, his sensei, Jiraiya of the Sannin, was his most trusted advisor and helper. A good relationship with your Jonin sensei could benefit you throughout your ninja career."
"But sensei, what if we don't like our Jonin sensei?" Sakura whined.
"Well, you won't always like everyone you work with, but that doesn't make it ok to not work with them. You'll have to learn to at least get along regardless of who it is," Iruka replied. "Now, starting team assignments. Team 1! Shirou…"
'Hn...no one here is even worth my time,' Sasuke thought to himself. 'Maybe I could convince the council to get me an apprenticeship...but is there anyone worth my time to apprentice under?'
"...Team 7! Sakura Haruno, Sasuke Uchiha,-"
"YEAH! TAKE THAT, INO-PIG!" Sakura squealed. "LOVE CONQUERS ALL!"
'Anyone but her...so help me if he says Ino or Kiba…' Sasuke thought in a state of mental panic.
"- and Kiba Inuzuka."
"Ohhhh, dog boy?" Sakura whined.
"Why do I get paired up with the scream queen and the prick?" Kiba shouted indignantly, getting an 'arf!' in agreement from Akamaru.
'FUUUUUUU-' Sasuke thought.
"Quiet down! Did you not listen to anything I said earlier? At the very least you have to get along to work together! Your ninja career only gets harder from here. There's no more safety net anymore, if you keep acting like this, you could get yourself or someone else killed." That seemed to quiet them down for the moment. "Your sensei is Naruto Uzumaki."
'Where have I heard that name before…' Sasuke thought to himself.
"Team 8! Hinata Hyuuga, Shino Aburame, and Hijiri. Your sensei is Kurenai Yuhi."
Hinata smiled at that. She knew Kurenai well and was excited to be working under her.
"Like a flame, we will burn our enemies together," Natsu said. "Our education here was not the filling of a pail, but the spark that lights the fire of our future."
Shino said nothing.
"Team 9...is...not on the list. I wonder why...anyway! The last team is Team 10! Ino Yamanaka, Shikamaru Nara, and Choji Akimichi!"
"What?" cried Ino. "I get lazy-ass and food-boy? Come on!"
"Man, what a drag," Shikamaru drawled. "Ino is so troublesome."
Choji continued to much on his chips.
"The three of you will be under Asuma Sarutobi. Now go break for lunch and be back in one hour to meet your Jonin sensei! Dismissed!"
{Timeskip}
Iruka's class of successful graduates were sitting together in their classroom, awaiting the arrival of their senseis while going about their usual day-to-day activities. Ino and Sakura were yelling at each other about who was better suited to be Sasuke's wife, Hinata was trying to avoid all forms of human life, and Hijiri was spouting off wisdom which, for some strange reason, exclusively involved fire-based metaphors.
Their activities, however, were interrupted by a large crash which involved a figure being thrown clear through the window of the classroom. "TWO HOURS LATE MY ASS, KAKASHI! I DON'T CARE IF YOU PASS THEM OR NOT, BUT DON'T MAKE THEM WAIT!"
"Ow~," the elite Jonin groaned, rubbing his head slightly and looking at the now silent class who were all staring at him.
"Who the hell are you?" Kiba asked.
"Right," the white-haired man sighed. "I'm Kakashi Hatake, Jonin sensei for Team 5."
"...You're our sensei…?"
"Unfortunately. My first impression? None of you are impressive. Meet me on the roof in five minutes." With that, Kakashi Body Flickered away.
"Troublesome…" Shikamaru grumbled, trying to fall back asleep.
"His inner fire is calm and controlled, like the peaceful blaze of a campfire. I wonder why his entrance was like that of a wildfire?" Natsu pondered aloud.
"He must not be very strong if he can get thrown in here like some ragdoll," Kiba commented as Team 5 filed out towards the roof, having processed what just happened. "I hope this Naruto guy is better."
"Team 8! I'm Kurenai Yuhi, please follow me," a feminine voice requested after entering the room briefly. "We'll be going to a local teahouse for our meeting."
"Team 1," a second voice added, a slightly lazy tone to his voice. "My name's Genma Shiranui, we're heading out."
"Where are we going, sensei?" Shirou asked.
"Who knows," he grumbled.
"Guess I'm up," a third gruff voice spoke. "Team 10! I'm Asuma Sarutobi. Let's get a move on. There's a local barbecue joint, we'll-"
"BARBECUEEEE!" Choji shouted, rocketing out of the classroom at supersonic speeds, sending papers flying.
"...oh boy…" Asuma grumbled.
"Troublesome…" Shikamaru agreed.
"Why me~?" Ino cried.
"Sucks to be you, Ino-pig!" Sakura taunted. "I'm with Sasuke!"
'Why did it have to be these two?' Sasuke mentally wept. 'ANYONE else!'
Over the next ten minutes, teams 2-6 had their senseis come in to retrieve them, leaving only Sakura Haruno, Sasuke Uchiha, and Kiba Inuzuka.
'Great! My sensei has no sense of time! Doesn't he know who I am?' Sasuke mentally raged.
'Kyaa! This means I have time to ask Sasuke out on a date!' Sakura cheered mentally. 'Let's do this, cha!'
Fortunately for Sasuke, she was interrupted before she had a chance.
"You three! Brats!" barked a voice. The three turned towards the door and had their jaws drop in shock. Standing at the door was a three-tailed fox the size of Iruka half glaring at them. "I don't know why I'm supposed to do this and you best believe your useless ASSES I don't appreciate it! I don't like humans AT ALL!"
"WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?" Kiba shouted.
"AAAH~!" Sakura shreaked. "TALKING FOX!"
"Hn," Sasuke grunted, seemingly uninterested.
"Yeah, I'm a talking fox, but I've never met a banshee before! Now shut your traps before I shut them for you by ripping out your damn tongues!" the fox ordered, shutting them up. "Now! I don't know why the hell I have to introduce myself, but I have my orders, so listen because I'm NOT doing it twice! I'm Suiko! Your-"
"Hold on, where's our sensei?" Kiba protested.
"I'LL GET TO IT IN A MINUTE, YA DAMN MUTT!" Suiko shouted.
"Wait...Suiko? You're a girl?" Sakura asked.
"You got a problem with that?" she growled.
"No, ma'am!" the pinkette shot back. 'Why am I obeying a fox, cha! WAIT! Why is there a giant fox here anyway, cha?'
"Good," the fox answered, shaking her fur slightly. She was a beautiful fox, truly. Her fur was a light sky-blue with a shiny white underbelly and a matching set of sky-blue eyes. "Frankly, I'm here to see if you're worth his time and I gotta admit that you don't look like much to me."
"HEY! WHAT'S THE BIG IDEA!" Kiba shouted while Akamaru growled slightly.
"Did I hit a nerve there, dog boy? What about you? The silent one. I smell fear on you, brat."
"Tch. I'm not afraid of a housebroken fox," Sasuke scoffed.
"The cocky ones are always the most fun to break," the fox grinned devilishly, walking towards the Uchiha. "Tell me. Are you any good at handling pain?"
"Hey, what are you doing to Sasuke?!" Sakura demanded.
"What's it to you, bubblegum? I'm gonna have an Uchiha for dinner!"
"Who are you and what are you doing here?" Sasuke demanded.
"You're just a fox! You can't take on three Genin!" Kiba agreed, preparing to attack the fox.
"Well, looks like I get to have a little fun," she grinned. "Good thing he's not here yet, because I'm about to-"
"About to what, Suiko?"
"Er…" the fox froze. "Um...nothing!"
"Are you sure about that Suiko? I could have sworn you were about to attack my little Genin hopefuls."
"Er...I was just...um...testing them! Like you told me to!" The fox was sweating nervously.
"Is that right? So you wouldn't mind apologizing to them?"
"A-apologize? Grrr…" the fox growled.
"Ok, I'm totally lost! What the hell is going on?!" Kiba demanded.
"Apologies," the voice that had been speaking to the voice said, dropping from the ceiling directly to the fox's right and gently petting the fox as it immediately calmed down and nuzzled into his hand. "I'll clarify things for you. I'm Naruto Uzumaki."
"Whoa…" Sakura muttered. There was their sensei, standing next to a fox that was almost the size that he was, just smiling as it nuzzled into his palm.
As opposed to his usual ANBU uniform, he adjusted his outfit slightly. He still kept the ANBU issue long pants and sandals, but wore a skin-tight, long-sleeved black shirt underneath his Jonin flak-jacket. His Leaf headband was tied over his forehead, but was slanted to cover up his left eye, and he had on a white trench coat with a red-flame pattern on the bottom, near identical to his father's, though it lacked the kanji for Fourth Hokage on it.
"I apologize about Suiko. I wanted to see if you were even worth speaking to. While you did pass, it wasn't by much, I hate to admit," Naruto smiled at them. "Since all the other teams have left, we'll have our meeting here."
"Ok...wait, what do you mean we barely passed?" Sakura demanded.
"And what's the idea of siccing your pet fox on us like that?" Kiba added angrily.
"Hey, easy Suiko," Naruto said, calming the growling fox. "I wouldn't say that to her. She's never been a fan of people."
'Where have I seen this guy before?!' Sasuke's mind raged, knowing he recognized him but couldn't put a finger on it.
"You did well enough, Suiko. Unless you want to hang around a bit longer, you can feel free to head on home."
"Why would I want to stick around here," the fox turned her head but didn't leave.
"Aww, such a softie," Naruto cooed.
"I'M NOT A SOFTIE! SCREW YOU!"
"That's why you're still nuzzling me."
"..."
"..."
"Just get on with it…"
"Alright, you heard her," Naruto smiled, sitting on the teacher's desk while gently stroking Suiko's fur. "Time to do introductions."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"Well?"
"Uh...what are we supposed to do?" Sakura asked timidly.
"I suppose you have a point," Naruto sighed. "Tell me who you are. Your name, some things about yourself, your likes, your dislikes, your hobbies, dreams for the future. All those sorts of things."
"Why don't you start? Like why you brought a giant fox with you," Kiba suggested.
"In my defense, you brought a midget puppy with you. This isn't much different," Naruto shrugged as the puppy growled lightly. "Cute. Very well then, I'll start. I'm Naruto Uzumaki. I'm obviously a Jonin of the Leaf and I'm eighteen years old."
'A Jonin at eighteen?' Sakura thought, shocked. 'Cha! I knew he looked young, but I thought only Sasuke would become a Jonin so young!'
'The same age as him…' Sasuke thought angrily.
"Let's see, some things about myself? Well, I like to think I'm rather well-known, so I'll let you do your own research," he winked at them. "As for my likes and dislikes? Well, I like foxes, though you probably knew that. I like ramen, dango, and sake from time to time. I love training, talking with my best friend, and my wife, Anko."
'Cha! I can't wait to marry Sasuke!' Sakura thought dreamily.
"Now, my dislikes. I suppose I dislike people that judge Anko for things out of her control. I dislike traitors and people who lie for their own personal gain. I dislike people who are offered help to escape their own darkness but refuse to take it. I dislike those who can't understand that this world is a hellscape that we live in and must make the best out of or be buried under it." The Genin hopefuls gulped. "Well, my hobbies? As I said earlier, I like going for ramen and dango, I like to train, and I like to play and spend time with my fox summons from time to time. Suiko here is a personal favorite of mine, but don't tell any of the others I said that."
"Oh, they know," the blue fox purred lightly.
"I'm sure they do. Dreams for the future? I suppose I want to know the truth. Much of my life has been a mystery, wrapped in what I believe to be conspiracies or cover-ups. I wish to know more." Naruto smiled. "Enough about me. Why don't we go to dog-boy next? You seem interesting."
"My name is Kiba Inuzuka, not dog-boy!" he shot back. Kiba wore dark grayish pants, a grey coat with a fur-lined hood and wrists, and a Leaf headband over his forehead. "I like dogs, training my Taijutsu, and having a good time! I dislike cats, people who dislike dogs, people who act like pricks, and whiny fangirls who don't know when to shut up. My hobbies are going on walks with Akamaru, training with my clan, and playing pranks with Shikamaru and Choji. My dream is for everyone to recognize how great dogs are and become the head of the Inuzuka clan!"
"You're Hana's younger brother aren't you?" Naruto asked.
"How do you know my sister?" he asked.
"Er…" Naruto blushed at the thought of the time he and Anko spent together...with the Inuzuka heiress... "She's a uh...friend of Anko's."
"Ok…" Kiba seemed suspicious, but he took the words at face value anyway.
"Alright, bubblegum? You're next."
"I'm Sakura Haruno! I'm twelve years old. What I like is…" she looked at Sasuke and giggled. "My hobbies are…"
'Oh, god…' Naruto mentally groaned. 'Step one; break this shit. Anko would have a field day…'
"And my dream for the future is…" she giggled again.
"Well...that was enlightening... Anything you dislike?"
"KIBA AND INO-PIG!" she shouted.
"Well...thrilling. If Suiko wasn't so preoccupied, she'd have eaten you by now."
"Did you say something?" the fox hummed dizzily.
"Oh, Sakura just said-"
"NOTHING! NOTHING AT ALL!" Sakura quickly shouted.
"Whatever…" the fox sighed and went back to its relaxing petting session.
"Well, last but not least, the brooder."
"My name is Sasuke Uchiha. I hate a lot of things and I don't particularly like anything," Sasuke grouched out.
"You seem to be a fan of Suiko," Naruto pointed out, noticing that while he pretended not to care, he seemed very interested in the fox.
"Tch. I guess I don't hate foxes," he scoffed. "What I have is not a dream because I will make it a reality. I'm going to restore my clan...and destroy a certain someone…"
'Damn you, Itachi, you made this really difficult didn't you…' Naruto mentally groaned. "Alright, well, I have some bad news, some worse news, and then some news you won't particularly like hearing. Which would you like to hear first?"
"What the hell? Those are all the same!" Kiba protested.
"Hmm, I guess you have a point," Naruto shrugged. "Well, the bad news is none of you seem to garner my interest. Perhaps one of you has a chance...but I won't tell you which one that is except that it's not the one you think."
"I bet it's Sasuke!" Sakura praised. "Wait, only one of us?"
"And it's not who we think, which means it can't be me," Kiba growled.
"Oh, like he'd care about a stupid mutt like you!" Sakura protested.
'What's he up to…' Sasuke mused, narrowing his eyes at the redhead.
"The worse news is that none of you are Genin...yet."
"What are you talking about?" Kiba demanded. "We passed the graduation test and that makes us Genin!"
"I'm afraid that's not true, Kiba. Every academy graduate has to take a second test determined by their sensei. There are no restrictions except that we can't intentionally kill you. So, if, say, a sensei doesn't want to train his graduates," Naruto eyed them evilly. "He can make the test impossible to pass...because if you fail the test, you get sent back to the academy for another year."
"WHAT?! THAT'S TOTAL BULL!" Kiba shouted.
"You can't do that to Sasuke!" Sakura protested. 'Who does he think he is, cha!'
'If he even thinks about sending me back…' Sasuke mentally growled, clenching his fists tighter.
"Nothing to say, Sasuke?" Naruto asked.
"I don't care what the test is. If you're worth my time, I'll pass it. If you aren't, then I'll pass it anyway and get a new sensei."
"Hmm...interesting," he mused. "Points for determination. Unfortunately, points are meaningless. Moving right along to the news you probably won't want to hear. Your test...has already started."
"WHAT?"
"YOU HAVEN'T EVEN TOLD US WHAT IT IS YET, CHA!"
"Just kidding!" Naruto chuckled.
"What the hell is your problem?!" Kiba demanded.
"Watching little Genin hopefuls squirm is so entertaining. You'll get it one day," he waved them off. "Your test is tomorrow and it won't be as easy as mine was."
"You had to take it too?" Sakura asked. "What did you have to do?"
"While I would normally scold your lack of subtlety, I set it up specifically so you would ask that question." Naruto gave her a look. "My test was to successfully disarm one of the best Kenjutsu users in the leaf. He was a war veteran from the Third Great Shinobi War and I was seven years old. Believe me. Yours will not be that easy."
'That's supposed to be easy? How are we ever gonna pass that, cha!' Sakura thought nervously.
'This guy's insane! He graduated at seven?!' Kiba worried.
'Wait a minute...this guy is-'
"Alright, dismissed. The three of you are to arrive at training ground three at, oh, let's say nine o'clock. If you're late, you fail. Now GET!" The fox barked at Naruto's order, causing Sakura and Kiba to yelp and run out of the classroom. "Ah, Sasuke. Why are you still here?"
"You were Itachi's teammate, weren't you?" Sasuke demanded.
"And if I was?"
"..."
"You see, Sasuke, there's a very good reason I'm your sensei. It's not because I asked for it or because I got drawn from a hat." Naruto shot him a grin. "It's because of a mutual promise I made with a...certain someone."
"My brother…" he snarled.
"Yes, Sasuke, your brother. He and I had an agreement," Naruto hopped off the desk and headed towards the door trailed by Suiko the fox. "If anything were to happen to him, I'd watch over you. If anything were to happen to me, he'd watch over Anko."
"I want NOTHING to do with him!" Sasuke practically roared.
"Ease yourself, Sasuke. I consider a descent into madness as 'something.' Surely you don't think your dear brother would have made that deal if he was always evil, do you?" Naruto turned to give him one last look. "And I'm fully aware of the reason you are somewhat partial to foxes. It's because of a lone ANBU agent who showed up at your door every Christmas and every birthday after your clan was tragically killed. Because that ANBU agent was me, Sasuke. I always keep my promises, so you'd better not fail my test."
With those final parting words, Naruto left the room, leaving Sasuke to think on everything that had just happened.