Chapter 45
Minutes felt like hours and hours felt like days as Bella and I waited anxiously for the phone to ring. When the call eventually did come - it brought news that I hadn't been expecting. The family was on their way home - with Edward in tow. There was something about hearing this that just didn't feel right, I wanted to trust my families judgement, but it all seemed too good to be true - especially after the call I'd had earlier with Rosalie. Hearing the outcome of the experiment did not ease my anxiety, it only complicated it. Once I'd hung up the phone - I looked to a nervous Bella who was eager to hear what had happened, though Carlisle hadn't given me much info.
"It seems as if everything was successful. Now, let's get you home before your father finds that note." I told her. For a moment, her disbelief mirrored my own, but then a thick wave of relief washed over her and tears welled in her eyes, though she was not sad.
"Really? Even after my blood? I mean . . . he was fine?" She was trying not to show her excitement, but I could feel it. She'd gotten the outcome she'd wanted and I wanted to share her enthusiasm I just couldn't seem to match it.
"That's the consensus apparently." I muttered. Bella flung herself across the couch, into my arms, and began to sob loudly into my shoulder. All the stress she'd carried through the day seemed to melt away then.
"That's great. I mean - I wouldn't have been upset either way - it's just nice to know I have some more time to say goodbye to everyone and to get fully prepared." I nodded and decided to keep my worries to myself for the time being so that she could enjoy the news and this moment. "So . . . I mean . . . what do we do now? Do I tell Charlie that you're not moving then?" She asked after a moment, squeezing me tightly. I took a moment to savor the feeling of human Bella in my arms - something I'd been so certain that I was going to lose today - I let her scent, warmth, and softness sooth me for a moment before I spoke.
"Just tell him that my parents changed their mind - that Esme likes the small town life and Carlisle could tell that she wasn't happy about the move despite her reassurances."
"This just feels so strange. Like waiting for a sneeze that never comes." She said with a chuckle, her gaze fixed on the floor.
"I'm not sure I remember the exact sensation you're describing, but I think I understand what you mean." I said with a laugh.
"So . . . now what? I mean . . . do I get to meet him? Or do we still need to be separated?" She sat up and wiped her face before grabbing her coat and her bag from beside the couch and slinging it onto her lap.
"We'll take it nice and slow - but I guess that would be the next logical step, if he really has overcame this. I need to talk to Alice as soon as she arrives. I have a few questions, but they won't be home until sometime late tomorrow evening."
"Can't you just call her?" She asked, shoving one foot into her sneaker.
"Yes, but she's in the car with Edward - and I'd like to keep the conversation private."
"So you still don't trust him?" She asked a bit hesitantly, pausing.
"Look Bella, I don't want you to worry just yet. I do trust that, for whatever reason, this was the best course of action. That doesn't mean that I necessarily trust Edward. At least not just yet." She bit her lip and nodded and I could feel some of her good mood faltering, but she tried not to worry.
The ride back to her place was calm and quiet. She'd turned the radio on low, found the bluegrass station, and peaked up at me for approval. I gave her a grin and put my arm around her shoulder and that's how we remained until we pulled up in front of her house. She nearly ran the whole way up to the front door once we arrived and I tried not to let the dark cloud I was carrying follow us inside. I watched as she fumbled with her keys and unlocked the door. She made her way straight to the kitchen where she'd left the note for her father this morning and blacked out her writing - running a pen frantically back and forth over the words before ripping the paper into exactly one hundred and twenty- six small pieces. Then, she went over to the trash can, lifted up a pizza box and a few other items that were sitting on top and threw the pieces of the note underneath to try to conceal it. Then, she carefully replaced the items on top and looked at the trash can skeptically for a moment before deciding that it passed her visual inspection.
"We could have just taken it outside and burned it you know" I told her, fighting a smirk.
"It's fine - I'm just being paranoid anyways." She stood there for a moment, still gazing back at the garbage can. "On second thought, I'm just going to run this outside . . ." She went over and started to tie the top of the trash bag, but I sighed and went over to relieve her of the chore - met by an exasperated breath as she crossed her arms. I cupped her face in my hand and ran my thumb over her cheek bone gently.
"Look Bella, it's been a long day. Why don't you go take a hot shower and put on something warm. I'll take care of this and meet you upstairs in your room." She sighed and hopped up to place a kiss on my cheek before heading upstairs. After I'd taken out the trash and came back inside, I heard the water pipes creak and groan to life before settling into the steady stream of the shower. I sat on the couch in the quiet living room and texted Rose.
Can you talk?
Just a moment later the phone buzzed in my hand.
Yes. It's just Emmett and I in the Jeep.
I took a deep breath and dialed her number, she answered on the first ring.
"Hey." She answered, lacking all of her usual attitude and hostility. I paused for a beat, caught a bit off guard by her tone.
"Uh - Hi. So . . . Can you fill me in? What really happened today?" I asked anxiously, my leg bouncing involuntarily.
"Look, I was supposed to call you anyway. Alice wanted me to give you a message." Suddenly my heart sank. I knew that it couldn't be anything good, or she'd have delivered the message herself.
"Okay - so what is it?"
"Um let's see - she said that the road ahead is still rough - make sure to remind Bella how important it is that she keeps track of her dreams and that she promises this was the best choice - though it was not an easy one." She said carefully.
"So what you're basically saying is don't trust Edward?"
"I wouldn't, no. But look, Jasper, you know she's doing what's best - sometimes that means looking beyond the obstacle at hand. I could tell this was a tough choice for her. She was working hard all day to sort through everything - she never took what was happening at face value."
"I know you're right - but this just feels like the wrong move. I'm half tempted to just go change Bella now and get it over with." My mind was spinning. Why should I leave Bella human if Edward was still going to be an obstacle once he returned? What had been the whole point of this if the end result was just more fear and mind games. Now that he knew exactly what he'd been missing out on - he very well may have just been putting on an act today and I had a feeling Alice was aware.
"Don't. That was another message. She saw your reaction and told me to tell you that she was firm on her decision. Do not change her or there will be consequences just as dire as Edward." She said gravely. I sighed heavily and fought the urge to argue. Shooting the messenger would do me no good and being mad at Alice was also a waste of energy. Instead, I needed to get in her head and understand her choices. I just hoped she'd shed some light on the whole thing once they returned.
"Fine. I've got to go." I hung up the phone without bothering to wait for her response, only feeling a slight twinge of guilt. I was beyond frustrated. Though, I couldn't help but remember Bella's immense relief at finding out that she was able to remain human. Deep down, I could feel that Bella was not quite ready to be changed, so maybe defying my better judgement was necessary here. I heard the water shut off upstairs, then seconds later I was startled by the sound of a car pulling up out front, though it was familiar - Chief Swan's cruiser. I panicked for just a second, not sure whether I should stay put and tell him in person that my family would be staying in Forks, or if I should head upstairs and hide in Bella's room. I felt a wave of irritation from him as he pulled into the driveway and I wondered what was wrong. I didn't have much time to decide my next move, so I opted for running upstairs and knocking on the bathroom door. A wave of fresh steam and the scent of strawberries hit me as Bella cracked open the door and poked her head out. Her hair was soaking wet and she clutched at the towel she had wrapped around her, a bit of embarrassment rolled off of her as she chewed on her lip. It took everything I had to keep my jaw from dropping to the ground. She must've been able to tell, because a small grin broke across her lips.
"Uh, wow. I mean . . . your father is home, I'll be in your room. Just wanted to give you a heads up." I said, trying to keep my eyes on her eyes and not let them wander down. Instead they settled for the beads of water rolling down her neck and catching on her collarbone.
"Okay, thanks for letting me know." She stood on the tips of her toes to reach up and kiss my lips - I bent down and met her half way. My imagination was starting to get the best of me. Just then, I heard the knob on the front door turn I felt a wave of panic as Bella stopped and gasped, but I was already out of sight silently shutting myself behind the closed door of her bedroom. I took a deep breath as I sat down on her bed. I missed little moments like that, where worry was replaced with lust and excitement. It'd been a while since we could focus on anything but the impending doom of what was going to happen with Edward - her heart was still racing from inside the bathroom.
"Isabella Marie Swan!" Her father yelled up the stairs in a strange tone that pulled me from my thoughts.
"Yeah dad, I'm here. One second, I just got out of the shower." Then realization struck me. My truck was still parked out front, something we'd both over looked after being mentally drained from the day. I shot up off of the bed and headed downstairs quickly.
"Chief Swan! Were the fish biting today?" I asked in a cheerful tone, probably a bit too cheerful - if his mood was any indication.
"You have about five seconds to explain to me why you were upstairs while my daughter was in the shower. Better yet, why are you even here? I thought your family left town." His irritation began to bubble and morph into anger.
"I was just taking Bella's things upstairs for her. It's been a long stressful day, but my family has decided not to move, my mother wasn't happy with leaving Forks. Bella and I were able to work things out. I can assure you that it's not what it looks like."
"Uh huh - well since you have a dry head of hair I guess I'll let it go this time - but so help me god if I ever find out that anything else was going on . . ." he trailed off - his mood was still a bit turbulent, but the anger started to dull.
"Noted." I said, shoving my hands into my pockets.
"It's pretty late, guess you oughta be goin' . . ." He suggested firmly, after a moment of awkward silence.
"Yes sir. But would be it be okay if I at least waited to tell her good night? I only just got back to town a couple of hours ago." I lied.
"Fine, but you're out of here by 11. Got it?" I checked my watch and nodded. It was 10:51 pm.
"Understood."
I could hear Bella waiting at the top of the stairs for us to finish talking and I hoped that she'd been able hear most of it. A few seconds later I heard her clumsy foot steps coming down the stairs.
"Yeah, dad, sorry. Uh, Jasper came by a while ago with the good news and we went and grabbed a bite to eat - but I spilled my milkshake down the front of me and had to come home and get cleaned up." He looked at her for a moment before his hard expression softened. She'd thrown on a pair of sweat pants and an oversized sweater. We exchanged a glance of understanding and I was thankful she'd caught most of my conversation with her father.
"What a lovely reunion story." He said sarcastically, his mustache cocking up on one side with a smirk.
"Uh, I'll walk you out." She offered. I grinned and let her escort me to my truck, though her wet hair and lack of coat worried me slightly as we walked into the chilly night air. Once we were outside I slid my jacket off and draped it over her shoulders.
"If your dad asks, just tell him I have another one in the truck. I'll be back before you know it. I'm just going to drop this back at home and I'll run right back over. Have your cell ready and call me if you need anything." I told her.
"I'll be fine, no other vampires in town remember?" She smiled and fought back a shiver.
"Just Esme." I reminded her.
"Well now that you mention your sweet mom - I am a little nervous." She said with a chuckle.
"You do know that Esme's track record isn't any better than the rest of ours right?" I raised an eyebrow and gave her a devilish grin.
"Wait . . . Really?!" Her eyes grew wide and her face crumpled with disbelief.
"Yes, really."
"Huh. I guess I just can't imagine . . ." She trailed off.
"I only brought it up to ruffle your feathers a bit. You don't have to worry about her coming by for a midnight snack, she's able to control herself quite well. Plus she likes you too much." She let out a nervous laugh and brought her hand up to her neck.
"Okay, well hurry back please."
"See you in twenty minutes my love."
Rain began to pelt the windshield on my drive home. I decided to stop at the main house and leave my truck there. I found Esme reading on the couch when I came in, I wanted to check in with her before heading back to Bella's.
"Well hi son! I didn't expect you home for a while!" She shut her book and laid it on the armrest of the couch.
"We've actually been out at the cabin all day. Alice's idea. You weren't supposed to know unless we needed you."
"Huh. Well, you were successful, I had no idea. Though, I do wish you would have brought Bella by. I could have made dinner, but I understand that you must've had your reasons."
"So I guess Carlisle called?"
"Yes, he said Edward did a lovely job. What's with the long face? Isn't this what you and Bella wanted?" She asked. I pondered over exactly how much to tell her. I didn't need my distrust for Edward rattling around in her thoughts. Though I did want to open up to her and warn her, to tell her what I thought.
"How good are you with keeping secrets from Edward?" I asked, trying to hide my doubt. I didn't figure that it was one of her strengths.
"Admittedly not very, but I promise to try my best. I've just never had much of a reason to do so, but I'm familiar with the process." I mulled it over for just a second. I did want to confide in her.
"Well, Alice told me to keep an eye out, that just because they're coming home doesn't mean this is completely over, but that it's for the best. I just don't know what she means and I'm having a hard time keeping my faith in her when my head is screaming at me that she's wrong. She had Rosalie relay the message, so I know she's trying to keep Edward out of her head."
"Hmm. That is quite the predicament. It's hard to have blind faith Jasper, but sometimes it's necessary. You just need to trust Alice and protect Bella at all costs the best that you can. If she thinks that turning her today wasn't the best choice then we have to believe it to be so. She only wants the best for everyone."
"Sometimes I just worry that by trying to keep everyone happy she's missing something. Is it really about Bella's safety or is there some selfish part of her that's worried about her own interests as well?"
"Alice is not selfish. You know that. She loves you and she loves Bella, but she also loves her husband. You cannot blame her for trying to produce the best possible outcome for all of you - Edward included." She said.
"I guess you're right. Thank you Esme - and please, try to keep this between us. I don't want Edward to know that I'm suspicious just yet. Just be aware and keep your eyes and ears open for me - he'll never expect that you're watching him."
"I can do that. Oh, I love you son. Tell Bella I send my love and bring her by soon." I gave her a hug and headed back to Bella's - with the weight on my shoulders just a little less heavy.