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Chapter 23 - The Right Thing

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Hana hates hospitals. They never bothered her before, but now that she spends most days stuck in one, she's learned to hate them.

She sits up, tries to ignore the sudden dizziness, and peeks at the form lounging in the chair next to her bed. Sometimes, she wonders what everyone sees in that pathetic excuse of a boy. But at other times, she cannot refrain from admiring his handsome features, his messy black hair that would somehow look ridiculous on any other head. Even when he's fast asleep in a chair, he looks perfect.

A part of her would have preferred Sakura to fall for a guy like Naruto. The blond would snore, mouth wide open, and drool all over the armchair like the golden retriever that he is. Instead, Hana is stuck feeling things she's not supposed to for a jerk with the looks of a Greek god.

As if he felt the heat of her glare on him, Sasuke stirs awake and rests two tired ebony eyes on her. It takes a few seconds for him to register that she's awake, but when he does, he jumps out of his seat to tower over her.

"What's happened?"

Hana has to remind herself that his concern is not for her well-being before a blush creeps to her cheeks. She shifts back and away from his tempting form, his body heat, and his soft touch and leans against the wall behind her bed. "That's a good question," Hana says, avoiding his gaze. Then, she notices the tree facing her window, and her eyes trail to the familiar rooftops behind it. "We're back in Konoha," she realizes.

"Yes," Sasuke answers in a breath before sitting back in his chair and resting his head in his hands. "I carried you home. Naruto and Jiraiya left to get the woman."

Home. It feels nice to hear it, to think she belongs somewhere, but deep down, Hana knows Konoha is not her home. The people here know her as Sakura or as the girl ruining Sakura's life. How could she ever feel at home in a place where no one knows her? Home is where the love is, isn't it? And as much as Hana cares for the members of Team Seven, she has to accept that the feeling will never be mutual.

"What are you thinking about?"

She lifts her gaze and notices Sasuke's intense stare. "Home," she whispers. The boy's eyes roam over her features, scrutinizing every detail, from her lips to her frowning forehead.

"Do you miss it?"

The question takes Hana off guard. She wasn't expecting him to care. Her eyes trail to the window, and she shakes her head. "How can you miss something you never had?"

"Once you get a body, you'll be able to make this place your home."

A smile tugs at the corner of her lips, but it doesn't stay long. She returns her gaze to Sasuke. Before, Hana would have taken that look in his eyes as pity, and she would have hated him even more for it. But now that she knows about his brother, his clan, and his conflicted feelings, she can read him better.

"And you'll be able to make Sakura your home." The tip of his ears turns red, and he diverts his eyes. "It's fine. I get it. I was there when you two kissed."

"You were?"

Hana snorts in front of his flustered face. "I'm always there when Sakura's in charge."

"Oh."

"In a way," she adds with a smirk, "you kissed me too." Sasuke leans back in his chair far away from her, a hand running through his jet-black hair. "Relax, Uchiha. I know it wasn't meant for me. I'm not delusional."

As long as she shares Sakura's body, none of the kisses will be meant for her. And unfortunately for the innocent pink-haired girl, the same rule applies to her. Hana's heart skips a beat at that realization. Is Sakura changing too? Taking more of Hana's personality, acting less like herself? How much of Sakura's changes made Sasuke notice her? How much of Hana Sasuke likes in Sakura?

"Hana!"

The girl snaps her eyes open when two hands grip her shoulders. She stares at Sasuke for a few seconds, trying to get back her bearings. When did she close her eyes?

Reading the confusion on the girl's face, Sasuke loosens his hold. "You've been out for about five minutes."

"Five minutes?" Hana straightens up in her bed and glances at the closed door. "Did you call someone?"

"No," the boy answers, taking a step back and engulfing his hands in his pockets. "I wasn't sure if I should."

"No. It's better if no one else knows."

"That you're losing consciousness?"

"That we're merging."

Sasuke's body stiffens, and for a while, he stares deep into her emerald eyes, trying to read her. "Merging?" he asks, breaking the silence. "What do you mean, merging?"

Hana rolls her eyes. "If you don't know what merging means, it's not my problem."

"I know what it means," he retorts, striding forward with a frown. "I just don't understand why you would act so indifferent about the whole thing. You wanted your own body just as much as Sakura wanted you out. Is it because of the-"

"Don't flatter yourself, Uchiha. Your kiss wasn't that great. Plus, if I wanted you to kiss me again, I would prefer it to happen with a body of my own. You don't know how hard it is to be stuck watching things happen to you without a say in the matter."

"At least you can see something. Aren't you sending Sakura in a freaking cell every five days?"

That feels like a slap in the face. Sasuke's anger, judgement, and resentment are taking Hana off guard. Everything she ever did, every decision she made, was only to protect herself. She's all alone, has always been. He, of all people, should understand that. She shouldn't feel guilty for choosing herself when no one else would.

But then, why does it feel so wrong? Why do Sasuke's words hurt so much? She's heard Sakura's complaints before and never thought twice about it. But what does that say about her? If she can put an innocent girl in an icy, pitch-black cell without an ounce of remorse?

"I'm a bad person," Hana whispers with widened eyes.

Confusion replaces the anger on Sasuke's face. "What?"

"Deep down, I always knew Sakura's situation was worse than mine, but I never cared. I shouldn't have locked her in that cell; the situation reversed, she wouldn't do it."

"No," Sasuke answers in a breath. "She wouldn't. But Sakura is in a league of her own. Don't compare yourself too much, or you might just give up entirely."

Hana blinks, mouth agape. "You feel the pressure, don't you? Every time you're with her, you feel the pressure. And you're standing on the edge, tempted to cross the line, to hurt her good, once and for all, just so you can return to your old life when you didn't have to live up to other's expectations."

Sasuke frowns and stares at his hands. "So she can be free. All I want for her is to be free." And just like that, the boy's judgmental stare is back in place. "How can we stop the merge from happening?"

She shrugs. "Kakashi was supposed to look into that, but then your brother happened." Sasuke's hands turn into fists as he paces the room, breathing hard. "But I might have another solution."

A knock on the door stops the boy dead in his track.

"One minute, please," Hana asks before the nurse enters.

"Visiting hours are over, dear. Say goodnight."

When the footsteps recede, Hana turns her gaze to the black-haired boy standing in the middle of the room. "Do you trust me?"

"No." The girl narrows her eyes at that, and he sighs. "But I don't have a choice."

"Good. Then meet me back here around midnight and bring your mission bag."

"My mission bag? Where are we going?"

"It's my leverage," she answers, getting up. "I'm not telling you, so you don't leave without me." She opens the door. "Goodnight, Sasuke-kun," she says louder, with a mocking smile.

"See you later," Sasuke answers as he brushes past her.

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Hana fastens her pace and lets the sound of the wind muffle the concerns filling her mind. Sasuke will act according to plan; if he really cares about his pink-haired teammate, he won't back down. She's been repeating those words for hours, like a mantra, trying to convince herself that her plan will work. It has to; too many lives are at stake.

The girl suddenly comes to a halt at the spreading of numbness up her arms, quickly reaching her head. She knows she has to keep moving, but her feet are glued to the bark of the tree. Her eyes are closing, and there's nothing she can do about it, nothing she can do when her body topples over the branch and towards the ground. She braces herself for the hit without a care in the world, already half-conscious. But an arm snakes around her waist and pulls her back against a hard chest before she reaches the forest floor. Everything turns black.

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When she opens her eyes again, she realizes she's leaning against broad shoulders and that the sun is setting. The man who's carrying her slows down upon feeling her stir awake. She's suddenly dumped on the forest floor, and when she looks up, her eyes land on a porcelain mask.

"I'm a friend of Wolf," a male voice says before she panics. "Why did you collapse?"

She lets her eyes trail to the scenery behind the tall man, to the winding creek, the rice paddies, and the tall trees. "We're in Hinode," she whispers in shock. "For how long was I out?"

"Twelve hours, give or take. Now, answer my question."

Hana sighs as she tries to stand on unsteady feet. "Sakura is in a coma, and we are merging." When she meets the confused gaze through the slits of the mask, she elaborates. "If the merge is completed, there will be no more Nezumi Hana and no more Haruno Sakura. Even if they bring us both back from the Tsukuyomi trauma, the girl will never wake up, nor will I. It will be someone else, an in-between."

"What does that mean for us?"

"For Konoha? Nothing. Except that if we merge before reaching Orochimaru, I guess the deal is off."

"No time to waste, then," he says, tugging on her arm. "Are you able to run?"

She nods, then follows him, crossing the creek and entering the dark forest, all the while trying to ignore the flashbacks this familiar setting is bringing back to life.

They cross Oto's border in no time, and Hana is thankful for all the workouts she and Sakura have done since Waves. A few weeks ago, she would have been left behind, clenching her sides, her heart ready to explode. But now, she's able to follow a grown-up man, to contain her pantings to a minimum, to show fewer weaknesses.

"Who are they?" Hana asks after noticing the group of rogues that have formed around them.

"Orochimaru's guards," the Anbu answers, coming to a stop. "Let's just say they are less trusting since your last visit."

The man lifts his mask just enough to uncover his mouth, then sticks his tongue out. At the sight of the black seal on the pink flesh, the rogues step back to create one path ahead.

"I think you both know where to go," one woman says, pointing at the side of a cliff standing tall behind her. "Master is aware of your imminent arrival. Don't make him wait."

The Anbu gives a sharp nod, then tugs Hana's arm forward. She pulls back with a frown. "I can walk by myself, thank you."

Waves of laughter irrupt from the group of rogues, but the girl ignores them and hastens her pace towards the entrance of the familiar cave. She enters with trepidation, but she hasn't even taken five steps inside that the Anbu deviates her from the main hall and drags her to a dark corridor on the left. He applies pressure on a rock, and the wall in front of them gives place to a descending staircase.

On the first step stands a man with round glasses and silver hair, tied in a low ponytail. "It's been a long few days, and we just got back from a mission ourselves, but we are happy to welcome you inside our walls again, Nezumi Hana," Kabuto says with a strained voice. "If you'd please follow me."

He snaps his fingers, and the Anbu hurries to light the torches hanging on the wall with his chakra. Then, he bows to Hana. "My part of the deal ends here. I hope for you and the girl that you're planning on going through with the entire plan. Otherwise, He won't be happy."

And just like that, the Anbu leaves the cave. "He's going back to Konoha, reporting everything," Kabuto says before walking downstairs.

"I know that," Hana replies, her chin up, following him. At the foot of the stairs, a narrow hallway lightened by more torches is awaiting them. On each side are lined wooden doors, but Kabuto dismisses them as he walks resolutely forward at a hastened pace.

Hana follows him silently as he leads her through a maze of never-ending corridors, a hand on her pouch and her shoulders tensed.

"You're quiet." Kabuto breaks the silence as he stops in front of a door. "Are you having second thoughts?"

He leans against the concrete wall, and through the darkness, she can only see the two dancing flames reflected in his glasses. "No, on the contrary. I'm wondering why we're still talking. I need another body, right now."

"Why the sudden urge?" He steps forward with a smirk plastered on his face. "I see nothing wrong with this body."

"Of course not. You're creepy." She swats his hand away when he catches a lock of pink hair between his pale fingers. "Back off, pervert. You're too old for us."

"I'm patient, Hana-san," he answers with a Cheshire grin. "In two or three years, she'll be in my range."

She shakes her head, nose wrinkled in disgust, and turns her back on him to inspect the dark hallway behind her. Will Orochimaru arrive that way? Her heartbeat quickens at the thought of seeing the snake-like man again. What did she get herself into?

At the sound of someone clearing their throat, Hana snaps her head back to glare at Kabuto. "I wasn't talking for myself," the silver-haired man resumes as if he never stopped. "But for a boy from a prestigious clan. You might know of him?" His smirk widens, sending shivers down her spine.

"Save your breath." Hana's answer echoes against the walls, giving her confidence. "I know what you're trying to do, and you're wasting your time. I don't care if Sasuke finds me pretty or not."

"Is that so?"

Her heart sinks in front of his knowing smile, so she turns to face the door. "What are we waiting for, anyway?" She reaches for the knob, but Kabuto's icy fingers catch her wrist in a feral grip before she can even graze it. "Let go," she whispers through gritted teeth, trying to wriggle out of his clutch.

"Now, listen to me, little brat." Kabuto swings her against the wall opposite the door and grips her chin in one of his hands. He rests the palm of his other against her collarbone, and Hana watches in fear as the chakra at the end of its fingers grows into scalpels, nearing her throat. "If you don't want to die a horrible death, I suggest you stop acting around like you own the place. You will comply with everything Master asks of you without a word, or your pink-haired friend will lose her pretty head. In case you hadn't quite caught it yet, you're not a guest here, mouse. You're our prisoner."

She wishes she could glare at him, but fear has replaced the little courage she had left. She gulps when his fingers dig inside the flesh of her face. Her teeth unconsciously biting at her lower lip, she gives a hesitant nod, to which the silver-haired man answers with a satisfied smile.

The door creaks open as his hold loosens. They both glance at the opening, but apart from the white light shining through, there's nothing else to see.

Hana was expecting Orochimaru to be standing there, so her shoulders relax in front of the empty space. But her respite is short-lived; Kabuto's hand closes around her wrist, and before she can react, he pulls her through the open door. She squints her eyes in front of the white, blinding lights and stumbles into a metallic cart.

"Careful not to spill the ink, dear. We will need it," a crisp voice hisses somewhere in front of Hana.

Kabuto releases her wrist and walks to plant himself beside a crouching form. Long, silky black hair hides the person's face, but Hana can see a hand covered in bandages brushing the writings of a big, old-looking book with the tip of its stiff fingers.

She takes a step forward upon recognizing the yellow pages and the disturbing images. "That's my mother's book."

"It's the same edition, if that's what you're asking." Orochimaru straightens himself, and after inhaling deeply, he turns to face her. "You smell like fear and guilt, little mouse."

His yellow eyes roam over her body while an expectant smile stretches on his lips.

"I doubt you can really smell that," Hana answers with a lump in her throat.

"It's a figure of speech, of course," he chuckles, striding towards her. "But I can hear your heart, little thing. I don't think it's supposed to beat that fast." She half-listens to his teasing, eyes glued to an unconscious form laying on a bed of white sheets. "Ah, yes. You haven't met yourself yet."

Hana lets him push her forward with widened eyes. "Myself," she croaks, dumbfounded. Her eyes trail from the dozen of tubes to the young woman connected to them. She has olive skin, short, dark hair; she looks strong, tall. There is something beautiful and oddly familiar about her. "Isn't she a bit old?"

"Weird. I find Sakura's body young for you."

"Maybe," she replies, inspecting the woman closer. "She looks familiar."

"That's because you know her," Kabuto whispers in her ear. She stares back at him, notices his playful smirk, and that's when it hits her.

"Wolf!" She leans forward, scrutinizes every inch of her face. "What happened to her?"

"Your sensei almost killed her," Orochimaru answers. Hana jerks away when he puts a hand on her shoulder. "Instead of discarding the body, I thought we could use it to our advantage."

"Is she dead?"

"I can hear your reticence, mouse. Never try to do the right thing; that's my advice to you," the older man says, boring his eyes into hers. "Either you take control, or we pull the plug."

Hana glances one last time at the unconscious woman, the one who taught her how to use a kunai, how to throw shurikens, how to be a badass. Something is thrilling about the thought of ditching her teenage years for the early twenties. Orochimaru's advice lingers in the back of her mind. Is it wrong if she wants to listen to it?

"Will Sakura be okay?"

"Don't worry. I need dear Sakura-chan alive for some other purposes." Orochimaru pulls on her arm and leads her to another bed on the other side of the room.

"Fine," she sighs. "What do you want me to do?"

"I heard the other part of our deal is on its way, so we can proceed. Take off your clothes and lay on that bed."

She complies silently, guilt swelling in her heart. She flinches at the first contact of the brush against her skin, the icy touch bringing back memories Hana wasn't ready to relive.