Ash stood completely still, ignoring the cramping in his muscles. He stood watching looking over his Pokémon as they came in to end their run. As the stragglers came in, led by Pikachu Ash sighed. He knew that he would need to keep moving. He couldn't stay still, couldn't stay in one place for a long length of time. Yet if he moved on from his current camp, the friends that had left him would never find him again. Torkoal, the pre-cursor to a flood of fleeing Pokémon, had never come back. Ash had not thought twice before letting his friend leave, but now he was questioning himself. Torkoal didn't want to be forced into the intense training, but as others saw they could leave, they had followed. Kingler had been the second, the euphoria of being back with Ash having long worn off. He had gone just a few days after Torkoal. A week later it had been Glalie and Donphan, leaving together.
Ash had slackened off the intensity of the training and for a fortnight he hadn't lost any more. It was still the toughest training that any of the Pokémon had ever done, but he had thought he had brought it down to something that all of the Pokémon could handle. That was until Noctowl left, with Torterra following the following day. After Torterra Ash had withdrawn into himself for a full day, snapping whenever a Pokémon tried to reach out to him. He had come back to them, but all of them could see how hard it had been on him. And if he left where they had been for the past six weeks, each of the Pokémon that had left wouldn't be able to return. They wouldn't be able to find him again and they would truly be lost.
Ash moved forwards, ignoring his protesting muscles as he strode towards Pikachu. Ash's starter had been the only one who had been able to stay close to him throughout the departures, always able to bring a smile to his trainers face.
"Pikachu!" Ash called as he approached the final group.
Pikachu glanced up and turned away when he saw Ash approaching. Pikachu muttered something to Muk who looked just as exhausted as the rest of the group, before moving away. Ash froze as his first Pokémon pointedly avoided him before turning away, head bowed. He returned to his position, looking out over the whole group of Pokémon.
"We'll leave tomorrow." Ash murmured to himself. "I'll talk to Pikachu on the journey. I'm sure he's just tired."
Ash blinked and snapped back out of his reverie to see his Pokémon lining up in front of him, slowly but surely preparing themselves for the next bit of training. Ash smiled, hiding his frustration behind the expression.
"Time to carry on." Ash said, before leading his Pokémon on once again.
Ash was sat meditating as his Pokémon rested around him. Many of them were eating, trying to recover after the intensity of their days work. The sun drifted across the afternoon sky lazily, basking the entire clearing in a warm glow. Ash heard movement around him, disturbing the silence and his eyes snapped open. Pikachu was stood in front of him, a sorrowful expression on his face.
"Pikachu?" Ash asked, slightly confused. Behind the little mouse he could see a bowl of food, untouched. A bowl that he recognized as his starters. "What is wrong?"
Pikachu seemed to hesitate, before speaking.
"Pika. Pikachu, Pika, Pika. Pikachu Pikapi."
Ash looked down at his oldest friend as Pikachu started to wave his arms around. He let his Pokémon talk, not wanting to interrupt. As Pikachu spoke though, a sinking feeling spread through Ash, starting in his stomach. He felt a crippling fear grip him, to the point where he couldn't interrupt Pikachu even if he wanted to. Eventually, Ash's hand came up almost of its own accord.
"You want to leave."
Pikachu nodded sadly, before bowing his head. There was a long silence between them as tears ran down Ash's face, mirrored by the ones on Pikachu's.
"Please." Ash said softly. "Please don't leave me. I need you Pikachu."
Pikachu looked up at his former trainer. He didn't say anything but he didn't have to. After so long, Ash knew what the expression meant. Pikachu had made his mind up.
"I'm sorry Pikachu." Ash said, his voice barely above a whisper. "I… I'm sorry that I have pushed you so hard."
Pikachu didn't say anything as Ash climbed to his feet and strode away, muffling the sobs that were escaping him as he disappeared away from the camp. The small Pokémon turned around to see the entire group of Pokémon staring at him. Pikachu ignored their gazes as he moved to his bowl of food and started to pick at it. As he hunched over the bowl, he felt the eyes on his back return to their own bowls, but he barely ate. It was hard to see his food through his tears.
Ash stood at the edge of the forest, looking out over the valley. In the distance he could see his Pokémon resting. He knew that he had pushed them hard but he thought that they had been in it for the long run like he was. Now he wasn't so sure
"I've done everything they've done." Ash said, mostly to himself as the anger rose in him. "I've pushed myself just as hard and I'm still going. Why are they all running away?"
He slammed a fist into the tress and growled in pain as the bark bit into his knuckles. He looked at his hand and saw small drops of blood welling where the tree had cut into it. After a long moment Ash let out a humourless laugh.
"Great. Just great."
He lapsed into silence for another long minute, his eyes once again fixed on the sight of his camp, more than half a mile away.
"How many more are going to leave?" Ash asked the trees around him. "How much longer do I have to endure watching my friends leave me behind?"
The whistling of the wind in the trees was his only answer, unsatisfactory compared to what he was seeking. For the first time Ash considered the possibility of going back. Of taking Pikachu home and giving up. Unbidden, Gary's face rose up in his mind.
"Welcome back Ashy-boy."
In Ash's mind the face began to twist, glaring at him.
"In truth I thought you'd last longer. Guess you're still as pathetic as ever."
"Get OUT OF MY HEAD!" Ash roared, the sound being swallowed by the density of the forest. He glared around at the trees accusingly, but all they did was sway in the wind back. As Gary's face faded it was replaced by Brock. Then May. Then Dawn, then Professor Oak. Each of them wearing a look of disappointment to see him back having trained so little.
Ash gripped his head with his hands, the mocking laughter of his friends echoing around his skull.
"Leave me alone!" Ash cried, trying to find an escape from the mental onslaught. They vanished, leaving him looking around the clearing. He blinked in shock as a red-headed figure appeared around a tree, staring at him. Pitying him. The worst face of all. The dream-face that drove him away from Pallet Town was back.
"Misty." Ash gasped. "I'm sorry."
"Don't be." Misty said her voice kind. "You were never cut out for this. You were never cut out to become Pokémon Master."
Ash recoiled. "Don't say that." He snapped.
"Why?" Misty asked, the pity sliding off her face to be replaced by a sneer. "You've driven all your Pokémon away. None of them will follow you anymore Mr Pokémon Master. Face it, you're a failure."
"I'm NOT!" Ash roared, stepping forwards. His fist swung towards Misty who vanished as Ash approached, his swing carrying him into a tree. Ash swore loudly at the pain before turning and glaring back at his campsite. His mind was wrong. His Pokémon were loyal. If he asked them to follow him, they would. But he couldn't let them drift away from him like they were. Ash had reached his breaking point. Either his Pokémon, his friends were with him, or they weren't. But he couldn't face losing them in ones and twos anymore. It was decision time.
Charizard looked up at Ash swept into the camp once again. Instantly Charizard knew something was wrong. A darkness surrounded his trainer, something that Charizard couldn't ever remember seeing. A darkness that was confirmed as Ash looked up, his once vibrant eyes turned dark. For the first time in his memory, a sliver of fear wormed its way into Charizards heart. Charizard owed his life to Ash, from when Ash had found him back when he was a Charmander, to when Ash had helped defrost him in the Orange Islands. It was a debt that was years old, but the prideful Pokémon had not forgotten it. For a man who put himself in danger as often as Ash did, it had been remarkably hard to repay the debt, but Charizard now knew how he would do it. Whatever had happened to Ash, Charizard would save him. He would stand by his trainer through thick and thin, until he found out what had happened. What had taken the life from his trainer and his friend. From the first human to treat him with genuine kindness. Something had broken inside of Ash and Charizard would not rest until he found out what.
"Pikachu wants to leave."
Charizards head snapped around to look at Ash in shock before his gaze focused on the little electric type. Every other muscle was frozen as his trainer talked.
"He feels the training is too tough for him, and knowing it will only get harder, he doesn't want to stay and endure it. He, like the others has decided to leave."
Ash took a deep breath and sighed. Charizards eyes narrowed as he looked down at his trainer. Ash looked every bit a broken man.
"Now, when we first got here I stood here and told you what we were doing. As a team you all agreed. It has been four months since we started here. Since we got here I have committed myself to training both myself and you. Some of you think I have lost my younger self, am more reserved, am colder."
Charizard was completely focused on his trainer now, sharp eyes picking up the slumped shoulders and the deep breath before Ash spoke again, his voice cracking.
"To you I say remember our defeat. We knocked out two of his Pokémon. Five years training made a mockery of. That is why I came out here to train, to get stronger."
Charizard felt a twinge of pride in the way Ash spoke. Ash was right, they had come here to get stronger. And they were. Charizard could feel the benefits of the training. He was quicker, stronger and more agile than he had ever been in his life. Even his trainer was showing the effects of the training, finally putting on muscle. Charizard felt himself nodding along at his trainer's words but when he glanced around he found he was the only one. Nobody else seemed to be agreeing with him, agreeing that the training was good.
"However, I will ask you the same question I did at the start. You have seen what you're going to go through. I will be with you every step of the way, but if for any reason you feel unable to complete this, please step forward now. I will permit you to leave."
Now the Pokémon around Charizard were nodding, and Charizard felt a rage begin to burn within him, an anger hotter than he had ever felt before. Ash had given them everything. He had brought Pokémon that had no home together and given them a family. Throughout his life his Pokémon were more important than his own wellbeing. And now that they were being given an out, they were abandoning their friend.
"However, if you stay I want this to be a commitment that you will be with me to the end. Take your town, make this decision. If you leave, I will not remember that you left."
'But I will'. Charizard said, his mind already made up. When he had gotten the message that Ash had left to train he had pushed himself to reach his trainer. He had found himself one of the strongest Charizard at Charicific Valley, but Ash had always helped him reach a new level. Ash was still helping him reach a new level. There was no way he would walk away now.
Ash's voice was muffled by suppressed tears as he forced out his final words, determined not to break down in front of his Pokémon.
"If you leave, I will not remember that you left." Ash said. "I will remember all the work you've done in the last five years, and I will remember you."
To Charizard's surprise Ash turned and walked away. He sat down, facing away from his Pokémon and started meditating. Charizard didn't need to see his face to know that the tears were once again running down it.
The Flame Pokémon turned his attention to his teammates who were looking at each other in amazement. Charizard growled his anger, causing those nearest to him to back away carefully. As he stomped away in a fury Charizard didn't notice how the flame on his tail had grown, his anger obvious for anybody who looked at him.
Ash stood on the hill that overlooked his camp as he watched his Pokémon line up in front of him. Pikachu made to step forwards but then seemed to think better of it. The Mouse Pokémon couldn't face another goodbye. Instead he turned and moved away, followed by the majority of Ash's Pokémon. As Ash watched, the tears fell once again but he made no attempt to hide them. Behind him he felt a wing extend, gently touching him. He glanced up to see Charizard looking down at him with understanding on his face. On his other side Sceptile put a paw out, touching his trainers arm. Bayleaf wrapped her vines around him as she joined the hug. At his feet sat his little Eevee, his newest team member. It had surprised Ash when she showed loyalty beyond the majority of his Pokémon. She looked up at him and he met her gaze, his expression one of thanks.
Suddenly she started to glow white. Ash dropped to his knees in front of her, his eyes shut against the bright light. As the light faded Eevee was gone, replaced by a larger Pokémon, covered in velvety fur. Gingerly Ash reached out and stroked her as she looked up into his face, a fearsome determination shown there as her forked tail flicked.
"Espeon."
Ash saw his own shocked face reflected back at himself in the gem on Espeon's forehead. For the first time he saw the blackness that had consumed both of his eyes, all life gone. Ash rose back to his feet to watch his Pokémon vanish into the forest. As the final ones disappeared he felt some of the darkness that had been consuming fade, a surge of power coming through his body instead. He glanced back down at Espeon who hadn't taken her gaze from his. In the gem he now saw one of his eyes full of colour again.
"What the…" Ash muttered. "What just happened?"
"Es?"
"I… I don't know Espeon." Ash said before turning towards his now extremely limited number of Pokémon. After five years the only ones that stood by him were Bayleaf, Charizard and Sceptile and his newest, his newly evolved Espeon. Ash shook his head.
"Thank you." He said sincerely. "I… I don't know how to thank you for staying. You guys are…" Ash broke down again, the words refusing to come out of his throat. Ash coughed forcefully, clearing his throat so he could talk again.
"Four of you." He mused. "We will continue to train, continue to improve. And eventually we will rebuild our team."
"Scep. Sceptile, tile."
"Huh?" Ash asked, before following the outstretched arm of Sceptile who was pointing back into the valley. In the shock of Espeon evolving, Ash had somehow managed to miss that one Pokémon had not followed Pikachu.
"Snorlax?" Ash asked in amazement. "Snorlax stayed?"
All his Pokémon could do was shrug, so Ash led them down the hill once again, moving back into the camp that had been his home.
"Snorlax?" Ash called.
The huge Pokémon turned and looked down at Ash who despite himself found himself smiling slightly. In either hand Snorlax had a bowl full of food, clearly claimed from those that had been left behind by the departees.
"Snorlax, you can leave if you want." Ash said sadly. "The rest did. I don't expect you to stay if you don't want to train."
Snorlax looked down at Ash before shrugging and turning back towards his food. Ash stared in disbelief.
"You want to stay?"
Snorlax looked back at his trainer and nodded.
"I… Thank you." Ash said sincerely. "I can't pretend to understand you Snorlax but thank you."
Snorlax nodded again before rubbing his stomach.
"You want food?" Ash asked, the incredulity creeping back in. When Snorlax nodded once again, Ash felt some confidence come back into him, confidence that had been heavily shaken by the departures.
"Then food you shall have." Ash declared. "I will feed you as much as you can eat, and once you're done we will train so you get hungry enough to eat again."
Snorlax looked down at his few remaining teammates with such a look of delight that Sceptile started to chuckle. For a long moment nobody else reacted before Ash stepped forwards and wrapped his hands around as much of Snorlax as he could reach. The Sleeping Pokémon looked shocked but put his food down for a moment to return the gesture, gingerly putting his arms around his trainer. When he let go, Ash turned back to his Pokémon, a new resolve evident in his one good eye.
"We will be the best in the world." Ash announced. "We will continue our training and become the strongest. Who's with me?!"
The answering roar was music to the ears of the battered, heartbroken trainer from Pallet Town. The Pokémon that stayed with him were as close as they could possibly be. And Ash would be proud to train alongside them.
A/N
So that is the Day of Departure in a reasonable amount of detail. Also, since I didn't really put a note at the end of the previous chapter this doubles for that one too.
Firstly, I'm slowly gearing up my writing once again. The final part of the main trilogy is still due to come in 2018, but I'm using the interim to write a few more things in here. I've not done as much as I wanted here so hopefully I can get some creativity flowing while I prepare for another major story. I've still got a list of all the things requested in reviews, but if anybody has anything to add, please let me know.
Secondly, this chapter itself. Ash has been taken down to the absolute depths (Kind of makes me feel slightly sadistic when I wrote it) but at least we all know he eventually recovers. And while it might look like he has recovered already, he has not. The next chapter will be set just a few days into the future and Ash will still be feeling the effects of practically his entire team walking off. After a couple like that we should be moving further forwards. I hope to get a few more chapters into this story by the end of the year, probably looking at one every couple of weeks or so.
That should be the lot from me for now. Until I get the desire to torment our protagonist further!
Iama2p