AN: A recent comment on this old story of mine brought me back after 5 long years. So much time has passed. I am reminded of how much I missed this story. To old readers – I am so sorry that you've had to wait so excruciatingly long to see the end of this saga. To new readers, I hope you have enjoyed this story that I consider one of my first real pieces of writing work that I am proud of. There will likely be one more chapter left to round this all off. Thank you to all of those who still remain to the very end

Chapter 28: "Life is but a Stage"

Harry awoke with a groan as the light filtered in through the window. He felt a rush of blood to his head as he set up, and held his head in his hands for a moment as it passed.

His night had been wracked with nightmares. Memories of red lights, tortured screams, un-ending happiness. Harry had an odd feeling that these were more than just memories, but he shook the feeling off for now.

After quickly using the loo and staring at his reflection in the mirror – he always admired the ruffled hair that he had inherited from his dad – he went downstairs. The smell of bacon and eggs wafted from the kitchen, making Harry take a deep breath, admiring the wonderful scent that was bacon.

He walked into the kitchen to see Minerva in dark red night robes, sleeves pulled up, over a pan of sunny-side-up eggs. Harry tilted his head as he watched her for a few moments. It was odd to see his professor cooking in the kitchen – it reminded him of Mrs. Weasley. He was going to have to get over that firm "professor" image he had of her, if she was now going to be his guardian.

"Good morning, Harry," Minerva said, stirring Harry out of his musings. "I trust you slept well?" Harry nodded, though frankly, he hadn't slept that well at all.

Minerva pointed to a plate of breakfast that was already on the kitchen table. "You'd better get to eating, then."

Harry sat down at the table, quite thankful that breakfast had already been prepared. Come to think of it, why was Minerva there making breakfast…

The events of last afternoon came back to him. Harry's stomach twisted. He turned his head to Minerva. "Professor, where's Severus?"

He saw Minerva's hand falter as she dropped the spoon into what looked like a pot of hot porridge. "He has not yet returned." Minerva replied simply, not turning back towards him as she spoke.

As she took the pot of porridge off the stove and turned around, her eyes widened as she saw Harry Potter standing right in front of her, staring straight into her eyes.

"Where is Severus?" he repeated. It looked like it pained him to repeat the question, a look of worry etched in his eyes.

Minerva sighed as she placed the pot back on the stove. "I must take you somewhere first."

"Where?" Harry said, the worry now reaching his voice.

"Go change first," Minerva replied, turning back towards to the stove. It was clear she wasn't going to explain now, and that Harry would have to wait to find out soon enough.

Severus was sleeping in an old, dingy flat in the middle of London. The cot that was in the room was hardly comfortable enough to rest in, but Severus hadn't had the energy to conjure something more suitable to sleep in. He awoke to the sounds of pigeons pecking at his window, and he awoke with a groan of his own. The memories of last night flooded back into his mind, as hard as he tried to keep them away.

He couldn't return home. Not after what had happened last night. Not after what he had done…

He was beside himself. Severus had done his best to make sure that Lupin would not be killed. He had told the other death eaters to dump him in the lake, not knowing that he had sent Minerva a patronus asking her to go to Hogwarts to look at the edge of the lake. He had played up his façade as much as possible. It was this façade that had required him to….

Once upon a time, many years ago, Severus might have relished in the chance to torture one of the members of the damned group that had given him so much grief during his time at Hogwarts. But things had changed.

Most of all, he could not face Harry. Not after this. Severus had promised to protect Harry. Instead, he had almost killed one of the people that Harry loved.

Severus never thought he could change. To be more than the death eater he was fated to be. The person that Lily would have wanted him to be …. he threw that away long ago when he uttered those stupid words to her, and threw away what little goodness was left in his heart. He chose Voldemort. And after Lily had been killed … Severus thought he would live in the darkness forever.

But something had changed the day that Albus had thrust Harry upon him. For 5 years, the sight of Harry had been a reminder of all that Severus had suffered – all that Severus had lost.

But, in such a short time… Harry had become a sign of what he could be. What a future for a sinful soul such as his could hold. What it could mean to love, and to be loved. For once…. he had yearned to be someone that could deserve that love.

But Severus was a villain. Had chosen the villainous path a long time ago. And villains could not have happy endings.

Minerva and Harry had apparated right in front of St. Mungo's hospital. Harry had no idea why they were here. Minerva had refused to explain anything. In fact, it seemed like she was struggling not to choke up every time Harry had prodded her for information.

They walked into the doors and were greeted by an old medi-witch.

"Who are you here to see?" the medi-witch addressed in a bored tone.

"We request access to high-security room number 12," Minerva replied in a firm tone.

High-security room? What was going on? Who were they here to see? But Harry knew better than to ask. With his heart beating in a panicked tempo, Harry took the pass that Minerva had handed her, and the medi-witch guided them through a dark hallway, into the high-security unit, and up to the door that had "12" plastered on it.

As Harry looked into the room, he did a double-take.

"Remus?!"

On a small, four-poster bed, barely able to fit his long, slender body, lay a bandaged-up Remus. But "bandaged-up" was putting it lightly. In truth, he was covered from head to toe in gauze, breathing heavily with an expression of pain permanently etched on his face. An array of empty potion bottles sat beside the bedside table – likely a remedy of pain relievers and healing potions.

Harry's eyes widened as he laid sight on Remus' figure. He ran towards the bed, careful not to jostle it, lest he cause the man any more pain.

"Remus, what happened? Who did this to you?!"

"S…Severus…." Remus rasped, a look of pain flitting across Harry's face as he heard the strain in it. Remus opened his mouth to continue to speak, but Harry had already whirled around towards Minerva.

"Severus did this?" Harry exclaimed as Minerva winced at the accusation in his voice. "Why didn't you tell me?!"

Minerva, who always looked so firm and sure in herself, was looking quite shaky right now. "I ... I couldn't..." She couldn't tell him. Couldn't tell him about when she received the patronus from Severus, telling her to go to the edge of the Great Lake that surrounded Hogwarts. Couldn't tell him what it was like to arrive there and see a floating body just along the shore of the lake. Couldn't tell him what she felt when she saw Remus, broken and barely able to speak, and having to frantically send a Patronus to Albus who was just in the tower above, to come help her move him. Couldn't tell him about the tears that threatened to fall from her eyes as Remus explained the whole thing.

A flash of shock crossed Harry's face at Minerva's hesitation. He had never seen her like this. "But…why?"

"Harry," Harry heard Remus' voice behind him, sounding surer than it was a moment ago, and Harry turned around to a faint smile on Remus' face.

"Severus is a man…. bound by choices made long ago. He is … a man who struggles to escape from the darkness that surrounds him," Remus said, squeezing Harry's arm in his own. "Before, the darkness was his only motivation, his only guide. But now, there's much more." Remus looked knowingly at Harry. "If Severus had wanted me dead…. I would be."

Harry was silent for a moment, processing what Remus said.

"We have to find him," Harry said finitely. Severus was not going to run away from this. He would not let Severus ….

"I think…. I may know a way how." Minerva said, hesitation in her voice. "It's … a locator spell," Minerva continued. "But it is not easy to make work. The wizard must have something that was gifted to them by the person they are trying to find, in order for the spell to work." Minerva looked down, not giving away the expression in her face. "Severus has always been a good friend, but he rarely ever gives gifts to anyone."

Suddenly, a light bulb went off in his head. He turned towards Minerva. "We have to go back to the house."

Minerva seemed confused at first, but nodded.

Harry turned back to Remus, laying a hand on his shoulder. "Will you be okay?"

Remus smiled. "I'll be fine. Will you?"

Harry nodded, a small smile on his face as well. "I will. I know what to do."

Severus stilled as he heard the sound of someone apparating behind him. He knew who it must be – could feel it in the stillness behind him - but he could not bear to turn around and meet his face.

"Severus," he heard the young boy say, as Severus slowly turned around to look at Harry's face.

"Harry." Severus tried to discern the expression there. For once, Harry was almost impossible to read. All he could see, was a flare of determination in those green eyes.

Silence hung in the air for a moment too long, before Harry spoke again.

"How could you do this?!" Harry suddenly exclaimed at him, his face full of pain.

Severus flinched at his words, expecting them, but not quite anticipating the pain he would feel upon hearing them.

"How could you think that you couldn't face me, that I couldn't understand? How could you think it was okay to just leave?!"

Severus' eyes widened as what Harry had said had registered.

"Harry," Severus rasped, the word weighing heavily in the room.

"Don't you `Harry` me," Harry retorted back. "Why did you just run away? Did you not think I knew the position you were in? That the Dark Lord is playing you, playing everyone, and that you had to act the part? Did you not think you could talk to me about it?"

Severus eyes held the weight of a thousand mountains as he spoke. "Harry…my entire life, I have been atoning for the sins of my past. I made choices long ago, and I have tried for so long to make up for the idiocies of my youth. But all I have managed to do is entrench myself further in deception and grow closer to the Dark Lord's side. For what? I could not even protect the life of an innocent person, of someone who was important to you…"

"The choices I've made have bound me to a fate that I can't seem to escape. I couldn't face my actions, nor could I face you in their wake." Severus' voice cracked, something that has never happened to the man who always spoke with such authority and sureness for most his life. "I'll always be a villain Harry, no matter how hard I try to atone."

A moment of silence hung in the air as his words hung in the air.

"That's bullshit."

Severus' eyes widened again as he processed the words the boy in front of him had uttered. "What?" he sputtered, as his eyes narrowed.

"Bull. Shit. You made choices in the past Severus. But you are not bound by your past," Harry said, tears in his eyes as his anger threatened to boil over. "You are only bound by who you want to be now. Who do you want to be, Severus?"

Severus held on to those words for a moment. Who did Severus want to be? Long ago, he wanted to be someone Lily loved. But he had also wanted power. He had wanted the darkness that came with it. Because of one, he lost the other. He had believed anything but darkness had been lost to him, after he made his choice to become a death eater. But this boy was standing in front of him – this boy who did not cower against his gaze, this boy who looked up at him with fervor and strength in his eyes. This boy, that for some reason…

Severus took a step towards Harry. "I want to be someone you can trust." Severus spoke, his eyes heavy with emotion. "I want to be someone you …"

Harry closed the gap, running up to and enveloping Severus in a warm hug. "I do," Harry replied, his face nestled in the black robes Severus adorned. "I do care about you, Severus. And I know… that you care about me too."

If he didn't know better, Harry could have sworn Severus' eyes shone with tears as he looked back up at him. "I don't see you the way you do, Severus. I don't see the dark paths you've chosen. I may have once. But now… I see a man who is trying to be good. Who is good. Even good people make mistakes, Severus. Don't let your mistakes choose your destiny."

Severus did not know how to respond. Harry let the silence fill the air, understanding that the moment did not need any words.

"…How did you find me?" Severus finally asked, after a few moments.

"Minerva … she told me about this locator spell." Harry let go of Severus, allowing Severus to gather his bearings back.

"But Harry, that spell … it requires the person you're trying to find to have gifted you something."

Harry smiled and held up the battered copy of Macbeth.

Severus stared at Harry for a moment, looking at the book that he had given Harry in only his first few days of staying with him.

Harry took a step towards him. "Life is but a stage."

Severus smiled. "And we are merely players."

Harry smiled back. "Shakespeare sure had some nuggets of wisdom, didn't he."

Severus chuckled.