Here I am again!
This series will be focused on the glorious violent friendship that is Barricade and my OC, Tatyana Topaz Prime..
Prepare for laughs, tears, and bodily injuries!
Hope you all enjoy!
Feel free to suggest things!
Onward!
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Car washes and the hilarious pain they bring...
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It was a hot summer day at the Witwicky residence.
Sam was home for the weekend along with Bumblebee, who were both sound asleep in their respectable areas. Tai, who was visiting with him, was up by this hour, all dressed and ready to start the day. After making sure her disguise was in effect, she grabbed her key chain ridden keys and headed outside.
'Yo, 'Cade!' She called, slamming the front door loudly, jolting the Ex-Decepticon out of recharge.
'This better be important..' He grumbled. Being stuck in car mode, he couldn't stretch out, which annoyed him but oh well, what could he do? Truth be told, he liked being here with the Witwicky's. It was quite relaxing and amusing. But by primus, if that damn rodent came near him again...
He had been Tai's guardian for almost two humans years now. And those two years were full of laughs, odd moments, random sentences, and tons of anime watching. Not to mention, he had to fight gagging whenever she and Jazz talked on the phone.
He had become pretty good friends with Bumblebee. They decided to let bygones be bygones, as the humans would say, about the fight they had when they first made contact with the humans.
He really had no choice. Both of their charges were related and were best friends, inseperatable actually. It was fine, Bumblebee was quite entertaining.
He never said this out loud, but he was very grateful that he was Tai's guardian. She made his life worthwhile, she gave him reason for fighting in this war. It felt good to have a purpose.
Now what the hell did this girl want at this ungodly hour?
'Whoa Cade!' Tai exclaimed in disgust. 'Were you in a mud wrestling match?'
That was a odd thing to say.
'Not that I'm aware of but give me enough high grade and I'm liable to do just about anything.' He enjoyed bantering with his charge.
'That doesn't surprise me.' She muttered, tilting her head. 'But seriously, dude, you are rank!'
'What was that?' He growled out. But she did have a point, he did feel rather...nasty. Dirt and mud had encrusted on his under side, his tires felt grimy. Hell, even his interior felt gross. Did he just think the word 'gross'? Wow.
'You heard me!' She laughed, giving his door a swift kick with her flip flopped foot.
'Quit jabbing, bitch!' His voice snapped through the radio. That caught the attention of a older woman who was walking her small fluffy poodle, who stopped and stared at the girl and the mustang.
'Just my idiotic friend, giving me crap!' Tai laughed, once again kicking the door. The door then opened sharply, bashing into her back and sending her flying face first into the grass with a yelp.
'Heh..Deja vu.' He muttered, remembering what he did to Sam a while ago.
'You bastard!' She growled. Getting back up slowly, she saw the old lady quickly walk away, her small dog in tow. 'Great, another person who thinks I need therepy.'
'Wouldn't be the first.' 'Cade said snidely.
'That's it, you are getting a car wash buster!' Tai got to her feet, not before throwing her black flip flop shoe at his driver window.
'Yeah, yeah..' He grumbled. He saw her moving around in the garage, where Bumblebee appeared to be watching in interest. Tai gathered all supplies needed for a car washing. A hose, sponges, a bucket, and liquid soap. 'Oh, sping meadow!' She said, reading the label.
Bringing it back outside to set in front of her guardian, she filled the bucket with the soap until the bottom was coated with the stuff. She then filled it all the way with water until it lathered and after making sure no one was looking, she warmed te water with her small cannon.
'Alrighty...first we hose ya down then we take it from there!' She then aimed the hose at him and turned it on. The Shelby mustang nearly jumped off of his axels. The water was fucking cold! He quickly moved out of the way of the streaming water.
'Hey! Get back here!' She exclaimed in annoyance as she continued spraying the hose in his direction.
'Damn it, that water is cold!' He snapped through the radio, not bothering to keep it down.
'Of course it is, what did you expect?' She snapped, continuing to hose him down. 'No use fighting it. 'Cade ol' buddy, ol' pal!'
'Frag it all.' He growled, giving up. After what felt like an eternity, the cold spray stopped and replaced with something much nicer. Warm, soapy water.
'Dude, are you purring?' She asked, stopping the scrubbing, much to his annoyance.
'NO!' He snapped hurriedly. Was he?
'Uh-huh.' Tai dead panned, continuing by kneeling down and scrubbing the area near his tires. That felt good. 'I can just see you kicking your leg like Psyche or Mojo.'
'Do NOT compare me to that little lubricating pest!' He snapped, relaxing immensely.
The sound of a window opening got their attention. Tai looked up and saw Sam, looking sleepy, as he peered out of the window.
'What's going on?' He called groggily.
'Attempting to wash my nasty ass guardian!' Tai said, falling forward with a yelp as 'Cade scooted forward. 'Would you cut that out!'
'Never!'
xx
Sam continued to watch with amusement as Tai fought with Barricade. Those two had a rather odd relationship. Way different than him and Bee. Bee would never call him a bitch or a skank or anything like that. He had found out from Optimus that Bee was pretty much the same age as a Earth thirteen year old, which was slightly amusing. He was technically older then his Autobot guardian by Earth terms.
Heading downstairs, he grinned when he saw Psyche laying at his Dad's feet, her huge tail starting to wag when she saw him.
'Morning sport.' Ron greeted, looking up from his paper briefly. 'Sounds like Tai and that Barricade guy are having fun.'
'Yeah, tons of fun.' Sam said sarcastically, making a grab for a muffin. A sharp slap on his hand caused him to jerk it back. 'Hey!'
'Samuel Witwicky.' Judy's voice had that tone that said, 'We need to talk, and when I say that, it means I talk and you listen.' 'I just went in to check on Bumblebee, and his is atrocially dirty, he needs to be washed. Tai has the right idea.'
'Ahh, mom...do I have too?' He whined.
'Go Sammie!' She snapped, reaching down to pet Frankie.
'Alright, fine.' He grumbled, getting up and heading back up to his room.
xx
Tai had finally got 'Cade rinsed off and she watched as he drove away, no doubt to dry off quicker. She stretched out on the lawn, yawning loudly as she relaxed. Her Dad always wanted her to take it easy every now and then, figuring she needed it. Which is why she was at her other families. Her Dad pretty much rocked.
Peering over her sunglasses at the sound of a door opening, she saw her cousin walking toward the garage. Bumblebee twittered excitedly at the sight of his charge who couldn't help but grin at his guardians bubbly attitude. He picked up the used cleaning material from Barricade's wash, refilling the bucket with fresh warm water from the garage sink.
'Alright, Bee...onward.' He gestured for the yellow car to follow him. Tai continued to watch with amusement as Sam hosed his guardian down when an idea suddenly struck her. Why not have some fun?
Sneakily grabbing the sponge from earlier, she got up an tip toed behind her cousin, who was busy humming a tune to himself as he soaped Bee's hood, the yellow car beeping and twittering happily.
She then smirked and threw the sponge, watching as it flew through the air and hit him in the back of the head.
'ARG!' Sam shrieked, nearly bashing into Bumblebee's door. Turning sharply, he glared at his cousin as she laughed at him.
'Bazinga!' She then shrieked when the water from the hose got her in the middle. Bumblebee had somehow managed to tranform his arm unti without either of them noticing, and had got Tai back for Sam's sake.
'Ah! Bee!' She shrieked, laughing hysterically. The yellow Camaro twittered in amusement, his human and Tai were funny. Jazz would be jealous he wasn't here, especially when he saw the attire Tai was wearing; A bikini top and swim trunks. Oh yeah, picture of that to send to him.
Picking the discarded sponge up off the ground, Sam threw it back at her, growling when she caught it with ease. She took aim and chucked it back at him, bits of water and soap flying as Sam ducked quickly, making it hit Bee in the windshield with a loud Slap!
Bumblebee twittered in shock, before aiming the hose at Tai again, whom swiftly ducked but was hit in the face by Sam's sponge, her cousin laughing wildly as she spat soap out of her mouth, before he squealed quite in an unmanly way as Bee got him in the back with the hose as well. Tai grinned before running over and grabbing the bucket of water and bringing it down upon Sam's head, his cranium disapearing under yellow plastic and soap, before she screamed as Bee got her with the hose as well.
Barricade, having dried off by this point, was driving back to the Witwicky house when he heard the commotion. 'Uh-oh.' He muttered.
'This water is freaking cold!' Tai shrieked, Sam chasing her with the hose by this point. 'AH! Douchebag!'
Bumblebee twittered in amusement, watching as the two teens laughed and played around. This was a good thing to see, those two had hardly any time to act like normal teenagers nowadays. Barricade silently pulled up next to the yellow Camaro, watching the amusing scene. 'What are they doing?
'It's called a soap fight!' Bumblebee told him through the comlink. 'It when humans engage in water sport activities for fun. It's hilarious!'
'Oh really?' Barricade mused on this new develpment. He then chuckled to himself. 'I just got an idea.' As Tai was being chased by the hose-weilding Sam, Barricade wheeled forward and placed his fron tire on the end of the pipe, blocking the water. When the hose stopped spraying, Sam stopped in surprise when his weapon lost ammo. And like any idiot, he held to nozzle to his eyes, to see if something was plugging it up-
SPLASH!
Tai had got Sam in the head with the sponge, squealing with laughter, before shrieking as Barricade released the hose and the water burst through with enough force to knock Tai down in a watery splash. Both teens were now laughing hysterically, soaked with water and soap. Barricade laughed heartily then yelped as Bumblebee somehow managed to jam the sponge inbetween his tires, the cold water dripping down into his gears.
'Arg! Damn you, Bumblebee!' Barricade bitched, using a force of air to launch the sponge at the yellow camaro, making it hit the windsheild, earning an indignant twitter from the Autobot. Tai and Sam got back to the hose, blasting the two cybertronians with the water, the two robots complaining about all the soaking.
Little did they know, Judy had come out to see what all the noise was about.
'What the hell is going on?' She then shrieked loudly when the two teens, in their alarm, turned the hose on her and soaked her to the bone.
Everybody froze. Tai eye and disguised optic widened, Sam gasped and then gulped, Bumblebee clicked worriedly, while Barricade just stood still.
Judy had this murderous look in her eyes, which made the two robots in disguise back away from the two doomed teens. Whipping out a soaked dishrag, seemingly from nowhere, she twirled it into a sharp rat tail and started advancing towards them.
'I hope you all know I was the water champion back in the day! Now to quote a great person; I'LL TAKE YOU ALL ON!'
Bumblebee and Barricade watched as Judy chased both of their charges around the yard, whipping them both in the backside. Tai shrieked when it got her in the leg and Sam yelled out in pain as it got him in the back.
Ron had come out, no doubt to work on the grass in the backyard and was watching with an amused smile.
Turning to the two cars, he patted their hoods and then said.
'That's my wife for you. Hurt the dogs, she'll kick your ass. Get her wet, she'll take you all on.'
The two cybertronians agreed.
Barricade grinned inwardly to himself.
He loved his new life with Tai and the Autobots.
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Bwahahahahahahahaha!
Thank you Soundwave 0107 for helping me come up with this idea! XD
Review!