The Messed-Up Wacko Demented Freaky Harry Potter Fanfic
Disclaimer~ I OWN NOTHING!!
It's the first day back at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Harry and the rest of the school are eating lunch in the Great Hall. All of a sudden.
Harry jumps up and runs to the center of the room. He stands in a disco position with his right arm pointing up and his left pointing down. He waits...
Suddenly, we hear the song "I'm Just a Love Machine!" blaring from nowhere. Harry rips off his robes and starts dancing to the song in his red boxers with white poka-dots.
"I'm just a love machine, and I won't work with nobody but.." He sings into a microphone that had just popped into his hand, then suddenly swivels around to Dumbledore and points at him adding "YOU!"
Dumbledore grins broadly and hops out from behind the staff table to join Harry on the floor. The music is still blaring, and another microphone appears in his hand. He starts dancing in old disco moves and looks like he is a retarded monkey. He rips off his robes and is wearing bright blue boxers with yellow stars. Dumbledore and Harry sing together at the top of their lungs almost completely naked except their boxers.
"I'm just a love machine, and I wont work with nobody but YOU!" Harry sings again, and Dumbledore bellows "YAAH BABY!!!!" and does back-flips in the air landing in the splits.
The students are deeply grossed-out in seeing Dumbledore in boxers, but some girls aren't in seeing Harry.
"OH HARRY!!! WILL YOU MARRY ME!!!???" a girl wearing a bright pink bikini yelled.
"Sorry," Harry said in a low charming voice, "but this body is only meant for one person. HERMOINE!!!!"
"YES HARRY DEAREST!!??" Hermoine says as she cups her hands together and stares at Harry in awe.
"Will you marry me?"
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Ron yells. "SHE IS MINE!!! ALL MINE!!!" And Ron gets up and grabs Hermoine around the waist and flings her over his shoulder. He runs out the doors yelling "MUAHAHAHA!!! I STOLE YOUR GIRLFRINED HARRY!!!!"
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!" Harry yells but is too late, Ron has already got on his broomstick and flown away.
"Owell," Harry said. "I'm the boy who lived. I can have any girl I want, and besides, Hermoine was butt-ugly!"
Next thing Harry knew all of the girls were running away from him.
"What?" Harry said in surprise.
"YOU SMELL BAD!!!" yelled Ginny.
"NO I DON'T!!! I MADE SURE TO PUT ON DE-ODERANT THIS MONTH!!!" He smelled his armpits. "No I didn't!"
"AHHHHHH!!!" Malfoy yelled "The stench of Harry Potter!! RUN AWAY!!!"
And everybody died from Harry's horrifying body odor, except Snape, who was immune. They ran off together and got married. The end.
Disclaimer~ I OWN NOTHING!!
It's the first day back at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Harry and the rest of the school are eating lunch in the Great Hall. All of a sudden.
Harry jumps up and runs to the center of the room. He stands in a disco position with his right arm pointing up and his left pointing down. He waits...
Suddenly, we hear the song "I'm Just a Love Machine!" blaring from nowhere. Harry rips off his robes and starts dancing to the song in his red boxers with white poka-dots.
"I'm just a love machine, and I won't work with nobody but.." He sings into a microphone that had just popped into his hand, then suddenly swivels around to Dumbledore and points at him adding "YOU!"
Dumbledore grins broadly and hops out from behind the staff table to join Harry on the floor. The music is still blaring, and another microphone appears in his hand. He starts dancing in old disco moves and looks like he is a retarded monkey. He rips off his robes and is wearing bright blue boxers with yellow stars. Dumbledore and Harry sing together at the top of their lungs almost completely naked except their boxers.
"I'm just a love machine, and I wont work with nobody but YOU!" Harry sings again, and Dumbledore bellows "YAAH BABY!!!!" and does back-flips in the air landing in the splits.
The students are deeply grossed-out in seeing Dumbledore in boxers, but some girls aren't in seeing Harry.
"OH HARRY!!! WILL YOU MARRY ME!!!???" a girl wearing a bright pink bikini yelled.
"Sorry," Harry said in a low charming voice, "but this body is only meant for one person. HERMOINE!!!!"
"YES HARRY DEAREST!!??" Hermoine says as she cups her hands together and stares at Harry in awe.
"Will you marry me?"
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Ron yells. "SHE IS MINE!!! ALL MINE!!!" And Ron gets up and grabs Hermoine around the waist and flings her over his shoulder. He runs out the doors yelling "MUAHAHAHA!!! I STOLE YOUR GIRLFRINED HARRY!!!!"
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!" Harry yells but is too late, Ron has already got on his broomstick and flown away.
"Owell," Harry said. "I'm the boy who lived. I can have any girl I want, and besides, Hermoine was butt-ugly!"
Next thing Harry knew all of the girls were running away from him.
"What?" Harry said in surprise.
"YOU SMELL BAD!!!" yelled Ginny.
"NO I DON'T!!! I MADE SURE TO PUT ON DE-ODERANT THIS MONTH!!!" He smelled his armpits. "No I didn't!"
"AHHHHHH!!!" Malfoy yelled "The stench of Harry Potter!! RUN AWAY!!!"
And everybody died from Harry's horrifying body odor, except Snape, who was immune. They ran off together and got married. The end.