Disclaimer: I really don't see why I must have one of these. I mean, it's fanfiction; the disclaimer is sort of implied. So I'm not going to say that I don't own Harry Potter. I'm not going to bother with assuring you that most of this is just my imagination. I'm not even going to worry about informing you that the plot is mine and not anyone else's. Nope. I'm not going to say any of that.
A/N: Uh…yeah. This story stems from an…er…interesting discussion. It's just a random little thing, which I will add to sporadically if at all. I don't really know too much about the UN, but I just had to write this, so I hope you'll forgive me. Oh, and if you read and make it all the way through, the least you can do is send me a quick review to tell me what you think.
Harry Potter and the United Nations' Big Mistake
Harry Potter leaned back in his leather swivel chair and surveyed the letter in his hand with a calm manner that belied his true shock. Since becoming the Minister of Magic, he had had to deal with several problems, but nothing like this.
After he had read the letter over several times, he leaned forward to look over his desk at the man who had brought him this information. "What do you make of this, Richard?" he asked. "Are we dealing with a real secrecy breach, or is this just some muggle's idea of a joke?"
Richard, sitting straight-backed in the chair on the other side of Harry's desk gave a curt shake of his head. "No, Minister. As I told you, I intercepted this message while sitting in on a session of the United Nations' General Assembly Plenary Committee. It's one of the more boring posts I've been assigned to in a long time, let me tell you. For the past six months, they've—"
With a wave of his hand, Harry cut Richard off. The man was a good information gatherer, but had a tendency to go a little off topic if not warned. "The part where you got this, Richard," Harry said, holding up the letter. "We can talk later, when it isn't official business."
"Right, Minister. Well, as I was saying, I was sitting and listening, minding my own business while the delegates gave their speeches on whatever it was they were talking about—landmines, I think. Yeah, landmines, that was it."
Harry shot Richard a piercing look. Richard sped up.
"Well, I guess I wasn't the only one bored. The delegates were sending notes left and right, and let me tell you, if more than one out of twenty were about landmines, you could have my job! There're generally people to pass notes for the diplomats, you see, but they were up and running, and I got mistaken as one. One of the men handed me that, and told me to take it to the Hungarian delegation."
"And that was when you read it, realized its compromising nature, and apparated straight to me with it?" Harry questioned.
"Of course, Minister. I don't know…but I think that the guy was serious."
Harry sighed. "I'd been afraid of that." Ever since that muggle J. K. Rowling had started writing books about him and the wizarding world, the muggle world was noticing more and more magic. Granted, they still thought that it was all the cause of an overactive imagination, but the fact that the ideas were out there frightened Harry. Thankfully, that Rowling muggle had been captured by the Ministry and was being held for questioning. And fans wondered why the seventh book wasn't written yet…
Turning his attention to the problem with hand, Harry said, "Thanks, Richard. I'll look this over some more…do a bit of research…" He waved his hand in a vague gesture that he hoped looked authoritative. "You can go."
Nodding, Richard got up and walked out the door, closing it behind him.
Again, Harry surveyed the note in his hands. Unfortunately, it had not disappeared or become less hostile in intent. If anything, the danger to the wizarding world seemed worse now. Again, he read the letter.
To: The Hungarian representative
From: The Wannakillawizardian representative
Mr. Janos,
We of Wannakillawizardia are pleased that you are in agreement with us on our plan to exterminate the wizards of the world. We agree with you that these users of magic are a constant threat to society and should be taken care of by those who do not ignore the problem, such as our countries.
As for becoming a member of the KATWOTW, simply send your membership dues to the headquarters in out capital and we will have you listed on the international registry of those sworn to protect our world from these magic-wielding menaces.
We look forward to any ideas you might have as to taking care of this pressing problem. We are especially in need of a plan to capture Harry Potter, who we have determined to head the underground society of the wizards.
Thank you for your concerns, and I hope to speak to you about this later.
—Don T. Lissentoomie
Harry threw the letter down onto his desk in frustration. He had no idea what to do. He barely understood about what the UN was, and here its member states were discussing his capture. This was not reassuring.
Taking out a quill and a piece of parchment, Harry began to compose a letter of his own.
Hermione would know what to do.