Chapter 17

~*~ 8 years ago ~*~

"I thought I'd find you in here," Draco said as he came into the library, armed with a plate of food and a mug of something steaming. "You haven't set foot out of here in days, you need to eat something." He plonked the plate down in front of Harry and handed him the mug with a stern look.

Harry accepted it and took a sip of the coffee. It was far too strong; Draco always added at least a spoonful more than was necessary to the cafetiere and everyone complained that his coffee had the potential to blow people's heads off.

"Eat," Draco commanded, and Harry looked at the plate in front of him, feeling his stomach churn at the sight of the food.

"I'm not hungry."

"Harry, you've eaten nothing more than a piece of toast in the last few days and you've shut yourself away in here like a hermit."

"I have to get on with this," Harry said, turning his attention back to the book in front of him. "I have to find a way to – "

"To what? Work yourself into the ground? Harry, you won't be able to do anything if you're too starved and tired to even stand. When was the last time you slept?"

"I used a couple of potions," Harry said dismissively, wishing Draco would go away and leave him in peace.

"Oh well that sounds very healthy," Draco said with a glare that would have made Molly Weasley proud. He sat back in his chair and looked at Harry with narrowed eyes, Harry resisting the urge to squirm under the man's peculiar brand of insight. "All the injured are gone," he said eventually, his voice gentle. "There's no one left but us, no one to…make you uncomfortable."

"They didn't make me uncomfortable," Harry said with a frown, hearing the lie in his voice.

"Not them, per se, but what they represent," Draco replied and a muscle in Harry's jaw twitched to be the focus of Draco's acuity. "Is that why you've shut yourself up in here for the last few days? What do you think you'll achieve by this?"

Harry took a deep breath and said, "I have to find a way to defeat him. I have to find a way to end this. Until I'm ready, until I'm as good as he is, until I'm better than he is more people will die. I can't let that happen, I just can't."

Draco sighed and said, "Look, Harry, I'm not going to sit here and pretend that all this isn't on your shoulders; it is, and to say otherwise would be a gross insult to you. I understand how difficult this is for you, I understand the pressure you're under but…working yourself into a frenzy will only weaken you in the long run. You have to be at your best to face him, not just magically but physically, mentally. Can you look me in the eye and tell me you could go up against him now?"

"You fucking dirty Slytherin," Harry said with a growl and Draco gave him a wolf-like grin. He chucked the book he'd been reading down onto the table and said, "Alright, I give in. What do you want from me?"

Draco's smile turned gentler and he said, "I want you to spend the afternoon away from this room. Come downstairs, have some food, take a walk in the garden, maybe get some sleep."

"Why are you being so bloody nice to me?" Harry asked, feeling his only option was to hide behind snotty petulance.

"Don't be such a prat," Draco said with an imperious sniff. "I like you," he said plainly. "Ron likes you, Severus loves you, however difficult you might find that to believe. We're not children anymore, which is a bloody good thing as we were both utter dickheads."

Harry laughed, in spite of himself, and Draco reached out to cup his chin gently. "We're adults now, both different people, and I'd like to undo some of the wrongs of my youth by helping you as much as I can now. Will you let me be a friend to you?"

"I'd be very grateful for it," Harry said, feeling choked.

"Good. Then you'll come downstairs with me."

"But I – "

"Harry," Draco said, his voice exquisitely gentle yet firm, "I wasn't giving you an option."

Harry gave him a resigned smile and picked up his plate of food and his too-strong coffee and followed Draco out of the library and downstairs to the living room. He didn't realise how hungry he was until he started eating, nor quite how dehydrated he'd been on the verge of being until he drank his coffee then downed a pint of water after. He felt better, not miraculously so, but the headache that had been thudding behind his eyes abated a bit and the dizziness that had been hovering around his head eased off.

He was persuaded to indulge a bit of trifle that Molly had sent over, revelling in the sweetness, then Draco insisted he accompany him in a stroll around the garden. Grimmauld boasted a surprisingly large garden, albeit a long, thin one, and Draco looped his arm through Harry's while he made him walk up and down it several times.

It was mid-December and bloody freezing, but Draco insisted the fresh air would do them both good. He performed a couple of warming charms and all but marched Harry around the garden, telling him that he expected him to get out there a couple of times a day from now on. Harry had more sense than to argue with the man; he knew it would be futile, after all.

"See? Now, didn't that blow away the cobwebs?" Draco asked jauntily when they went back inside, and Harry resisted the urge to smack him on the nose.

"I…I should get back to the library," he said instead, his eyes darting to the staircase.

"Oh no you don't," Draco said, grabbing the collar of his shirt and hauling him into the living room.

"Christ, Draco! You're supposed to be injured," Harry protested, amazed that the slight body held so much strength.

"I'm healing spectacularly," the man replied, forcing Harry over to the sofa and making him sit down. He took a seat next to him, the smug, jovial expression being replaced by a gentle smile as he said, "Give it another hour. Let yourself rest, then I promise I'll come back up to the library with you and we'll research together. I am a Malfoy, after all, there's very little I don't know about the Dark Arts or that slit-nosed bastard."

Harry let his head fall back against the sofa, sighing as he looked at Draco and said, "Fine. You win, I haven't the energy to argue with you."

"See? You're smarter than you look."

He reached for a newspaper from the battered old coffee table, a piece of furniture that Harry had an irrational and disproportionate hatred for. It was one of the ugliest things in the house, which was really saying something where Grimmauld was concerned, and something about it just set Harry's teeth on edge every time he looked at it.

He found himself looking at the twisted metal on the left-hand leg, wondering if the disfiguration was part of the design or if it had happened to the table by accident. He followed the curve of the table leg up to the flat of the table itself and felt his eyes get heavy as he traced the ugly rendition of a rose that adorned the table top. It was a horrible, twisted thing but Harry found his attention drawn to the middle of the flower as everything else fell away.

The next thing he knew he was slowly blinking his eyes open. It took a moment but he realised he was lying on the sofa, a blanket curled around him, and Draco was in the armchair opposite, one leg swung casually over the other as he sat perusing the paper.

"You bastard," Harry growled as he scrambled to sit up. "What did you do to me?"

"I made you get some much-need sleep," Draco replied, not looking up from his paper. "If you can tell me that you honestly don't feel better for it I give you permission to kick me."

Harry huffed loudly, but, disgruntled though he was, he had to admit, begrudgingly, that he did feel better. The grogginess that had settle about him like a cloak had subsided and he felt more clear-headed than he'd done in days.

"So I thought," Draco said, lowering the paper and looking at him.

"How long was I out?"

Draco's lip quirked slightly as he said, "Six hours."

"Six hours?!" Harry repeated, horrified. "What on earth – "

"Six much-needed hours," Draco said imperiously. "And now it's time for dinner so it looks like you won't be able to get back up to the library just yet. Sit there while I go and sort something."

"Don't tell me you're cooking?" Harry said incredulously, pulling the blanket around his shoulders as a chill drifted through the room.

"Of course not," Draco said with a snort. "Molly's filled the pantry up with meals to last for months. I'll go and heat something up. Stay put."

Draco left the room and Harry shook his head, realising that he'd have more success arguing with a dementor than the aggravating, irritating bastard who had appointed himself his minder. He sank back against the sofa and allowed himself a small smile as he felt a flicker of gratitude for Draco's heavy-handedness. If left to his own devices he likely would have worked himself into a frenzy and potentially made himself ill in the process.

He had no real clue how to look after himself properly and he was so preoccupied with finding an answer, with learning all he could to be an equal adversary for Voldemort he'd been quite prepared to neglect his health in the process. He knew it was a stupid way to go about things but his thoughts were dominated by his own shortcomings and how to address them that little else managed to fit inside his head anymore.

"Here, beef casserole," Draco said, coming back into the room, bearing a couple of steaming bowls. He handed one to Harry and took a seat next to him on the sofa as Harry nodded his thanks. "Marvellous cook, Molly," he said, tucking his feet beneath him as he drew his spoon through the hearty stew and let it cool down.

"Have you…spent much time with her?" Harry asked, intrigued to find out what, if any, interactions Draco had had with the Weasley clan.

"Not really," Draco replied with a regretful smile. "She doesn't know…about me and Ron, none of Ron's family do but…Ron assures me they'll welcome me with open arms. I'm not so sure."

"They will," Harry assured him. "They're a thoroughly decent bunch."

"A thoroughly decent bunch that I've terrorised and mocked throughout the years. Some of the things I've said about them…" Draco said, shaking his head and looking disgusted with himself.

"It won't matter," Harry said with a smile. "When they find out that Ron loves you and that you love him…that will be all that matters, I promise."

"I hope so, I really do. I…I really want to make this thing with Ron work but it could get bloody difficult if his family decides I'm no good for him."

"Draco, if Ron loves you, which I'm 100% certain he does, it won't matter what anyone says, his family included. He'll follow his heart every time, that's just the way he works. You're worrying for no reason though – they'll support him, support you both, I'm sure of it."

Draco smiled, looking comforted by Harry's certainty, and they settled down to eat their food in companionable silence. It was the first time in a while that Harry had eaten two whole meals in a day and, while he felt full, he felt decidedly better for it. Letting Draco look after him wasn't such a bad thing after all.

They finished eating and Harry cast a look over to the fireplace, the dying embers looking sad against the gloom of the imposing living room. He inclined his head and the fire sprang to life, an immediate warmth filling the cold, cheerless room. He looked across at Draco, who was regarding him with a tilted chin and a slightly raised eyebrow.

"What?" he asked.

"Wandless, wordless magic," Draco said softly. "That isn't something you come across very often."

Harry felt his cheeks flush and he said, "It's just a little spell. Nothing major."

"Harry, I know power when I see it. You could bring this whole house crashing down around us with one thought if you had a mind to." Harry opened his mouth but Draco held up a hand and said with a strangely knowing smile, "Don't shy away from it. You're nothing like him, Harry. You're powerful, but you're not dark."

Harry swallowed and cleared his throat, saying softly, "Thank you. I didn't realise how much I needed to hear that."

There was a comfortable silence for a few moments, the fire crackling merrily away in the hearth. Harry snuggled into his blanket and wondered if Grimmauld would ever be a nice, cosy place to live. It had the potential to be, if a person could manage to eradicate all the dark magic from every nook and cranny, but he wondered if there was just too much unhappiness and hatred seeped within the building's walls to ever truly be a decent home.

He wondered how Draco felt being shut up in the ancestral home of his mother's family, where the man saw his place in the world now he was estranged from his family and in love with a Weasley. He shifted his body to face Draco a little better and tucked his feet beneath himself as he asked quietly, "How are you?"

Draco looked at him, looking a little surprised at the question, and said, "I'm fine. Still a little sore in places but I patched up nicely. No lasting damage."

Harry nodded and said, "Good…but I meant…how are you…in yourself? You've been through a lot, more than just the physical stuff."

Draco gave him a sad smile and said, "I always knew it would end this way. When I made the decision to join Ron, to fight against Voldemort, I knew that I was closing the door on my old life forever. I know I won't see my parents again, at least…not in any positive capacity."

Harry frowned, troubled by his thoughts, and, dreading the answer, asked, "Was your father involved in…what happened to you?"

Draco paused, the same haunted expression that Harry had seen on Severus' face previously, then looked down at his knees and nodded. "I think he wanted me dead. I think it would have been easier for him."

"Christ, Draco," Harry breathed, sickened at the thought a father could behave in such a heinous way. He shifted a little closer, unsure exactly what he was going to do, and reached a tentative hand out to rest on Draco's shoulder.

The man looked across at him and offered a watery smile and Harry responded with one of his own, knowing it was probably scant comfort in the face of such a monstrous confession. "You have a family here," he said eventually, his voice sounding too loud in the vastness of the grim living room. "The Weasleys will embrace you whole-heartedly and…well…Ron's practically my brother so…I guess that means you're stuck with me for a brother-in-law."

Draco laughed and said, "Dear Merlin, what a horrible thought. Harry snothead Potter as a relative of mine? Oh how far from grace I've fallen."

Harry grinned and gave Draco's shoulder a squeeze, feeling a little of the tension dissipate. "So, where did you get with that crossword you were faffing about with earlier? Do you want someone with an actual brain to take a look at it for you?"

They spent the rest of the evening in the living room together and when Harry finally collapsed into bed that night he felt lighter and freer than he'd done in a while. It was amazing what a little rest, some fresh air and two decent meals could do for a person and he felt extremely grateful to Draco for forcing him out of the library.

He fell asleep quickly and deeply and if he dreamt he wasn't aware of it. He woke while it was still dark, groggy and confused, wondering what had woken him. He tried to take stock, tried to figure out if there was something different about the magic he could feel from the wards and it was only that he realised there was an arm around his waist and a body pressed against his back.

"Severus?" he whispered into the darkness.

"I didn't mean to wake you," the man murmured in response, his nose nuzzling Harry's neck.

"Are you really here or am I dreaming?"

"I'm here," Severus replied. "Go back to sleep."

Harry wanted to argue, wanted to turn around and see the man, to ask where he'd been and what he'd been doing but he was so tired and Severus sounded exhausted too. It was warm and snug in the bed and Severus' body was warm against his own. He nestled into the man's hold, smiling at how wonderful it felt to be back in Severus' arms, at how immediately content he felt in the man's presence.

He slept soundly and woke again to see a pale sliver of light creeping through the heavy bedroom curtains. It sounded as though it was raining heavily outside but Harry wouldn't have cared if a tornado had been blowing up the street, not when there was still an arm around his waist and a familiar chest pressed against his body.

He lay like that for a while, listening to the rain pound against the window, basking in the feeling of peace and contentment he felt at being back with Severus. His body had ached to be near Severus again, he had missed the man's touch so much it had physically hurt. He had also missed simply being with him, speaking with him, drinking in his company.

Eventually he felt Severus begin to stir and he shifted to turn around within the man's arms. "Morning," he said as he propped himself up on his elbow to look down at his lover, Severus' hand shifting to rest itself in his lower back.

"Morning," Severus replied, reaching up with his free hand to brush his fingers over Harry's cheek. "You look better than the last time I saw you."

"You have Draco to thank for that," Harry said with a smile. "He's appointed himself my babysitter." He let his eyes roam over Severus' face and said with a frown, "You don't look very well."

"I'm merely tired. It's been…a very trying time attempting to gather information that very often doesn't exist. I've had to fall back on old contacts, ones that I would very much have preferred to leave in the past."

"How long are you back for?" Harry asked, daring to hope that he would get more than a few hours with his lover.

"Until Christmas," Severus said with a smile, moving his hand up into Harry's hair and letting his fingers trail through the messy bird's next.

"Really?" Harry said, hardly daring to believe it. "We'll be together for Christmas?"

Severus nodded and Harry grinned widely before leaning down and finally kissing the man, moaning softly at the contact. Severus' hand moved to wind around his neck while his other hand moved up Harry's back to rest between his shoulder blades. Their chests pressed together and Harry's lined up the lower half of his body with Severus', languidly moving his hips and pressing his groin against Severus'.

"I've missed you so much," he whispered as he moved his lips to Severus' jaw then down to the man's throat. Severus was only wearing pyjama bottoms and he let his hand rove over the man's bare chest, revelling in the feel of skin on skin, loving the closeness the simple contact brought him. He wanted to map out every single of inch of Severus' body, to commit it to his memory where he could lock it away and keep it forever so that the next time they were parted he wouldn't feel so very wretched.

He kissed a path along the man's collarbones, and down over his torso, letting his hands guide him, letting his touch invite Severus in deeper for more. The pyjama bottoms were removed and Harry let his hands and lips move over Severus' thighs, smiling at the little intakes of breath from above his head. He wrapped a hand around the man's straining cock while he let his mouth move lower to nuzzle Severus' balls.

Long fingers twined through his hair as he stroked Severus' cock languidly, finally letting his mouth join in and kissing a path up and down the hard shaft. He licked and swiped at the head, teasing Severus for a few moments before he relented and moved his mouth lower. He bobbed his head up and down a few times before he took Severus to the root, relaxing his throat around the man's cock as it nudged him.

"Oh fuck," Severus whispered gruffly, and Harry would have smiled had his mouth not been otherwise occupied.

He cupped Severus' balls and rolled them gently against his palm as he deepthroated the man, feeling himself beginning to ache with his need to feel Severus inside him. His cock was throbbing most insistently and he wanted to feel the fingers that were currently twined through his hair plunging deep within him.

He released Severus' prick and kissed a trail back up the man's body all the way to his ear, where he whispered, "Make love to me."

He was rolled quickly but gently onto his back and Severus' lips descended on his own as he felt the man's hand travel down his body. It was utter bliss and Harry wanted to make this moment last for as long as he could, the thought always present in the back of his mind that this might be the last time they might get to do this.

The lips moved to his throat, his favourite place to be kissed, as he felt Severus' hand ghost over his achingly hard prick before it moved lower to brush gently against his entrance. He felt Severus' fingers, now suddenly slick with lubricant, tease a couple of circles before one breached him slowly, carefully. He closed his eyes and bore down against it, welcoming the intrusion with all his heart. A second finger was added, followed by a third, as Severus prepared him, taking his time, torturing Harry with the leisurely pace.

The preparation was lengthy and finally Harry felt the fingers being removed as Severus arranged himself between Harry's legs. Harry opened his eyes as he felt the blunt head of Severus' cock breach him, smiling up at the man as he pushed all the way to the hilt. "God yes," he breathed, tilting his hips up so he could take Severus in as deeply as possible.

Severus moved in and out of him a couple of times, taking it slowly, making sure Harry felt every inch of him each time. It was glorious and wonderful, and Harry thought that there was little better than feeling Severus moving within him. He wanted to put this memory in a pensieve, wanted to capture the ecstasy of being joined in the most intimate way possible to the man he loved.

Severus kept his thrusts slow and deep, allowing Harry to feel each one and revel in them. He lowered his head to kiss Harry as his pace quickened slightly and Harry felt the slight change of angle graze his prostate with each plunge inside him. He groaned into the kiss and wound his legs around Severus' waist, indicating his approval for the faster pace.

They moved together, Harry's body rising up in time to meet Severus', their torsos pressed together as they kept the rhythm going, Severus' hand curling around Harry's neck in an attempt to keep him as close as possible. Harry's world blurred to nothing but chasing that final crashing wave and he only dimly registered Severus' hand wrapping around his cock and pumping in time with their bodies' movements.

A few more thrusts and Harry came, pushing himself into Severus' hand as the man continued to pound into him until he found his own release. His pulse crashed within his ears as his body rode out his orgasm, every inch of him tingling, and still a tiny part of him lamenting that it was over, that Severus would soon slip from him and the beautiful closeness would be over.

Severus' head rested against his shoulder, his breath hot against Harry's neck. Harry rested his palm between the man's shoulder blades and closed his eyes as he allowed himself to bask in the afterglow. I love you so much, he thought into the silence of the room and briefly toyed with the idea of saying it out loud. He couldn't bring himself to summon up the courage so instead simply lay there with Severus' weight pressing down on him, thinking it instead.

AN: Not gunna lie, I love writing Harry and Draco's friendship almost as much as Harry's and Sev's...romance (if we can call it that in this fic :D). Hope you enjoyed the chapter, please leave a review and let me know.