Regina is drinking a glass of wine in Mary Margaret's living room. Of all the places Regina would have ever expected to spend a Saturday evening, this is surely at the very bottom of the list. But she and Emma are giving things a real shot now. And that means family. Both in the wonderful way where Henry curls up between them on the couch to watch a movie, and in the awful way in which Regina finds herself once again a part of Snow White's family.
Regina is looking around the small apartment while Emma, Mary Margaret, and David share a private moment in the kitchen, and Regina is all too happy to give them their time alone if it means that she can have a moment without having to watch Snow and Charming making eyes at each other. The apartment is small but homey, full of nicknacks and antiques. Regina notices a collection of items that Snow has clearly brought back from her trip to the Enchanted Forest and her old castle. Among the collection of trinkets Regina sees a ring. She would know that ring anywhere, had seen it for six years on her husband's hand. Suddenly, she can feel the weight of Leopold on top of her, can smell his sweat as it coats her body. The nausea is so intense that Regina isn't sure she can make it to the bathroom.
She turns and walks the short distance to Mary Margaret's bathroom. Regina manages to turn the water on and hopefully drown out the noise of her retching before bending over the toilet. She sinks to her knees, unable to stop herself from continuing to vomit. It's too surreal. The smell of Leopold lingers in her nostrils all these years later, and the fact that Snow is once again standing outside while Regina throws up in disgust and horror is simply too much to bear.
Regina hears the knock on the door, and her mind is still lost in the past, expecting the small child that Snow was to be outside asking what all the noise was, asking for her new mother to tell her a story. But Regina is brought back to the present by her lover's voice. "Regina?" She doesn't say anything, just keeps staring into the water in the toilet bowl.
Regina hears Emma open the door and cautiously pad into the tiny bathroom. Emma walks over to the sink and fills up a paper cup before sitting down next to her girlfriend. Regina can't bring herself to look Emma in the eyes, instead focusing on her shaking hands as Emma presses the cup of water into them. Regina puts all her effort into bringing the water to her mouth and sipping slowly.
Regina drinks the water while she tries desperately to push everything away. She just needs to get out of here with her dignity intact. She needs to leave this bathroom, leave this apartment, without showing anymore of herself to the people in the other room. But despite her best efforts at locking everything back inside, Regina feels the pain pressing against her chest until a sob bursts from her lips.
Emma's voice is calm and steady next to Regina. "It's ok. You're safe. He's dead." Regina turns to Emma in shock, looking at the blonde for the first time since she entered the bathroom. Emma smiles softly at Regina, and God is it a comfort, even though Regina wants nothing more than to not need anyone right now. Regina looks at Emma expectantly, wanting to know how her girlfriend knows this piece of information that Regina hasn't told to a single soul in the 45 years since she married Leopold. "I see how you react when someone mentions his name," Emma begins with an apologetic smile, "and I know how you hate when all my weight is on top of you."
Regina fights the urge to deny everything; to tell Emma that she just must have eaten something that didn't agree with her and to bolt from the bathroom. Instead she sits and breathes. She sits and breathes and tries her hardest not to feel like that seventeen year old girl, frozen helplessly under her husband, torn open and exposed for all the world to see. Maybe Emma senses her lover's urge to run from something that feels like vulnerability and weakness because Emma reaches out her hand for Regina to take, and in a voice devoid of anything like pity reminds Regina, "You're in control. It's all in the past, and neither you nor I will let anyone hurt you."
Regina takes Emma's hand with a small nod, and Emma looks relieved to have said the right thing, to have not frightened Regina away. "Snow always thought that I had her father killed to hurt her, but that wasn't the reason," Regina says, looking at Emma. "I spent six years lying underneath Leopold. Most of the first year of our marriage, I laid there crying and bleeding, but he just took what he wanted, because I was his wife and he didn't need anymore permission than that." The words drip from Regina's lips full of contempt. "I finally taught myself to keep quiet, to not let him know what he was taking from me." It's a moment of brutal honestly, to admit out loud that Leopold took something from her, that even though she had taken his life, that it wasn't enough to give her back what she had lost.
"I'm so sorry Regina," Emma says, giving Regina's hand a squeeze. Emma looks like she wants to hug Regina but is holding back, not wanting to invade the older woman's space if she doesn't want the physical contact. The compassion in Emma's eyes, the way she stares at Regina with such love even as they discuss the man that Regina had killed, reminds Regina that she is safe and loved. And right now, in this room with this woman, Regina lets herself seek comfort. For the first time in decades she allows herself to rely on someone else for strength. Regina wraps her arms around Emma and buries her face in the blonde's neck.
Emma holds Regina, rubbing soothing patterns on her back. "I love you," Emma whispers against Regina's ear, and Regina can feel something swell in her chest. What she feels now can't return what she lost all those nights on her marriage bed. But for the first time since Regina watched her mother crush Daniel's heart and seal Regina's fate, she knows that the man she had loved had been right.
Regina holds on tighter. "I love you," she tells Emma, letting the feeling of magic wash over her.