Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or Percy Jackson.

A/N: Hello all you lovely readers! Sorry it's been so long, I've had trouble with my internet.

Please read the note at the bottom, it regards the update schedule.

Anyway, in this chapter, Percy and the gang are introduced to the 100% honest newspaper of Britain or maybe just the Daily Prophet. :D

Enjoy!

Edit: Oops! Just realised I posted the wrong chapter last month.Sorry!

Chapter 7: Sheeple of Britain

Percy POV

Images flashed past my eyes. Cruel golden eyes. A gaping chasm. A bronze and silver scythe. A wasteland of fire and sulphur. A bronze blade, embedded in the hilt. A black blade, tumbling through darkness. A dagger, covered in blood. Bloodshot red eyes. A bone white wand. A green flash accompanied by a mad cackle. A stone angel. A metal wolf. A metal snake. A metal fox.

I burst awake in cold sweat. I blinked, unsure of where I was. Crimson drapes surrounded my bed. I heard heavy snoring. The Gryffindor tower, I realised. I was in my temporary abode.

When I awoke again, daylight was streaming through the windows. The drapes had been pulled back, and several faces were looking in. Nico stood, smirking. Neville looked near ready to faint. Ron looked groggy. Harry looked confused. I then realised my pillow was soaked.

I rolled my eyes. 'Whose idea was it to try and wake the Sea prince with cold water?' Neville actually fainted. Ron's eyes widened. Nico's smirk deepened. Harry looked horrified, and pointed at Ron and Nico.

Nico broke out into a broad grin. 'Tut tut, Harry. It was all of us. Well, except Neville. Besides, it was your idea. I mean, come on! Trying to wake a son of Poseidon with water!'

I gave a smirk in return. 'Oh, you'll regret this.' I focussed, feeling a familiar tug in my gut.

Droplets of water began to float off of my pillows, a mist hovering in the air. I slammed my palms together, and the molecules formed into a singular ball. Nico's eyes widened, and Ron and Harry began to back off. I whipped my hands apart, and flicked my wrists towards them. The ball split into three tendrils, sent spiralling off towards the three initiators.

Immediately, Nico shadow travelled away, and I allowed his tendril to collapse to the floor. Ron gave a shriek as the tendril curled around his body, drenching his clothing till the tendril was no more. Harry broke off into a run, but the tendril was faster, wrapping around his legs, causing him to trip over, collapsing onto a cushion of water, quickly drenching him too.

Nico reappeared, sniggering. Smirking, I summon up the water again, catching him off guard. Dumping it over his head, his hair fell into a sodden mess. He did nothing but glare.

'Thanks, guys,' I called over to them. 'That should help me focus for a bit. Use of my powers requires a fair bit of concentration, helping to alleviate my ADHD a bit. Anyway, we gotta go to the Great Hall now, right?'

And so we went as a group of four, finding Annabeth and Hermione already present.

Looking at my moody companions, Annabeth raised a single eyebrow at me. 'What did you do, Seaweed Brain?'

I gave her a sheepish grin. 'I mean, they tried to wake me up with cold water! They deserve it. Besides,' I added as an afterthought. 'It will help my ADHD for a bit.'

Annabeth frowned. 'Hang on, we've only been here for a day and your attention span is worse than it has ever been? How?'

'Well, I can't use my usual method, so…'

She cut me off. 'Usual method?'

I frowned. 'Don't you know?'

She raised another eyebrow. 'Know what?'

I stared at her, exasperated. 'My guitar! But I can't use it here, so I need somewhere to burn off steam, you know, fight. I mean, I will be doing a lot for the Tri-wiz, but I could do with a little extra to fend off the boredom.'

She blinked. And blinked again. 'You play the guitar?'

I blinked. 'I thought I changed the subject.'

'But… you play the guitar?'

I sighed, exasperated. 'Did your school never approach you about learning an instrument?'

She looked as if I had gone mad. 'Well, yeah, but I figured my dyslexia would be too much of a problem.'

I face-palmed. 'Unless you were singing, it wouldn't have been a problem. And you should have learnt an instrument - music basically strengthens all the weak parts of an ADHD brain!'

Her eyes widened. 'Really? I never knew that!'

Nico interjected this time. 'Really? I thought all schools offered it to students.'

Annabeth frowned again. 'You play the guitar too?'

Nico snorted. 'It's not just guitars, Annabeth.'

Harry leaned over. 'So what do you play, Nico?'

'Well I started with the keyboard - you know, an electric guitar, but I wasn't so keen on that. Too calm. So I then tried something else, then the bass…'

'Bass?' Ron asked.

'You know, a deep electric guitar with four strings,' I replied.

Hermione leaned in. 'You mentioned something else? What was that?'

'Uh,' Nico grew pink. 'The ukulele,' he mumbled.

Percy snorted. 'Ukulele? You?'

Nico sighed in exasperation. 'Doesn't matter! Anyway, I now play the drums, cause it helps with my, uh, anger issues as well.'

Ron frowned. 'I don't know about these instruments, coz we wizards seem to have a different range of instruments, but why can't you still play them here? Is it coz you left them in America?'

I snorted. 'Nah, Nico could easily fetch them. No, it is because the magic here interrupts with electricity, which is what an electric guitar uses, and Nico's is an electric drum kit.'

'Oh,' he replied.

Annabeth leaned in to face me. 'So Nico can play multiple instruments. Can you, Perce?'

I grinned. 'Well of course, wise girl. On top of the electric guitar, I can play the acoustic - not electric - guitar, the bass, drums, keyboard, recorder and - don't laugh - kazoo. I'm also a certified teacher for bass. I teach during the winter holidays for a bit of extra cash'

Nico grinned. 'You can't laugh at me for the ukulele if you can actually play the kazoo. And don't forget your lovely singing voice.'

Annabeth snorted. 'You sing? And how does Nico know?'

I raised my hands. 'Hey, we jam together sometimes. Rock it out, you know.'

Harry snorted. 'Whatever you say, singer boy.'

I could feel my ears flushing. 'Hey, it's well known that a lot of people who get struck by lighting are very musical.'

Hermione's eyes widened. 'You were struck by lightning?'

I cringed. 'Uh, yeah? I was seven, I think, on a school trip. They had the brilliant idea to fly us in a helicopter through the grand canyon. Zeus took umbrage, and I was struck, causing the whole helicopter to crash. I was the only one to survive. Now, I know that's coz I landed in the river. Anyway, they thought I had something to do with it, and I was expelled. I'm lucky I wasn't arrested.'

Hermione raised her hand to her mouth. Annabeth gripped my shoulder, judo flipping me onto the desk. 'And why,' she hissed. 'Have you not told me about this before?'

I raised an eyebrow. 'Why would I? It's ancient history. Can you let me get up? We're drawing quite a crowd.' Indeed we were. Annabeth's antics had drawn most of Gryffindor table, plus a few other houses, over to watch.

'Sorry,' Annabeth muttered. 'But why have you only mentioned instruments when I can't learn one?'

I looked sheepish. 'I thought you knew!'

She face-palmed. 'Seaweed brain.'

I stuck my tongue out at her.

Minutes later, there was the shriek of owls, and hundreds of the filthy birds swooped down. At first, I thought Annabeth had called in a revenge strike, but I then realised each of the owls were burdened with a package of some sort, varying in size.

At least a dozen of the creatures swooped down at me, and several more, uh, unloaded directly above me. Hermione even had to use a cleaning charm to rid me of the, uh, gunk.

Ron snorted. 'The owls really don't like you, do they,' he said as one particularly aggressive owl swooped down, stealing my breakfast.

I clenched my fists. 'Why are these demons here?'

Hermione stifled a laugh. 'They're the post, dummy!'

Stupid wizards with their stupid birds.

A small package landed in front of Hermione. 'Ah, the Daily Prophet.'

I frowned. 'The what?'

Harry stared at me. 'Use your eyes, man. It's a newspaper for wizards. It's the first day special, too. It's all about the Triwizard Tournament.'

Hermione slammed the paper on the table. 'Read,' was all she said.

I picked up the paper, reading the first page.

Tournament of the Gods?

By Rita Skeeter

Direct from Me, Myself and I, the Daily Prophet brings you coverage of the opening night of the Triwizard Tournament!

For those who somehow do not know, the Triwizard Tournament is a competitive tournament between the three schools of Hogwarts, Durmstrang and Beauxbatons in a contest of pride and glory. This year, however, we are joined by a fourth school. Or should we say 'camp'?

That's right, a strange new group known as Camp Half-Blood have now entered the tournament, claiming to be 'demigods' of myth - half-gods! Of course, it is up to me, Rita Skeeter, to try and route out the facts of these situations. And so I have been digging.

My first revelation was that this 'Camp Half-Blood' does not exist! These 'campers' claim to be American, and yet the only magical school there is Ilvermorny Academy! In fact, there is no such place as Camp Half-Blood anywhere!

Such revelations are so alarming, I knew I needed to dig a bit deeper. And boy, did I find something.

Perseus Jackson, born in Manhattan, has quite a track record. At only seven years of age, he blew up a helicopter, killing a teacher and several classmates. At twelve years old, not even a second year, Perseus had already found himself a wanted criminal. That summer, he began his crime spree by blowing up his father's Camaro, before kidnapping his mother. He then began a trail of destruction across America, with key incidents including blowing up a bus, the St. Louis Arch and 'Aunty Em's Garden Emporium'. In this year, he was accompanied by fellow 'camper', Annabeth Chase.

The muggle authorities were then clearly illegally obliviated, for young Percy was allowed to leave scot free. But this was not the end of Percy's crime spree. In the following winter, he blew up a zoo, and then a school at the start of the summer, followed by a cruise ship at the end. Again, the only punishment Percy received was an expulsion. Again, he was followed by Ms Chase.

The following winter, Mr Jackson's crimes were taken up a notch. He kidnapped two students of a prestigious boarding school, and proceeded to trek across the nation with them. The eldest, a girl, died during the journey, and her brother, Nico di Angelo, has apparently been brainwashed or Imperiused, and is the third camper present at Hogwarts. The year concluded with a bombing at the Hoover Dam, followed by another bombing at Mount Tamalpais. This time, he was not accompanied by Ms. Chase.

Mr Jackson did not stop there. The following summer, he, Ms Chase and Mr di Angelo went on another bombing spree, bombing significant places such as Alcatraz Island, The Garden of the Gods and an apartment in Manhattan.

Mr Jackson's latest crime spree occurred last year, with him being aged sixteen. He, along with Ms Chase, led a terrorist uprising in Manhattan, cutting off all communications. For the majority of the summer, all inhabitants were under a magical coma, while this group of terrorists, of unknown number, roamed free. By the time the city was restored, the terrorists were long gone. Their actions were clear, however. There was extensive damage throughout the entire city, most significantly including the collapse of the Williamsburg bridge, the removal of hundreds of statues, the sinking of boats in the East and Hudson rivers and extensive bombing of the Empire State Building.

The reasons for these actions are unclear, but what is clear is that Mr Jackson is a very dangerous individual. It is of the Prophet's opinion that Mr Jackson has some sort of agenda, and is an up-and-coming Dark Lord, whom Headmaster Dumbledore has taken to Hogwarts to keep an eye on, and that the whole 'demigod' story is simply a cover up.

Albus' decision could easily prove disastrous. We urge all those at Hogwarts to be weary of this young terrorist.

Our next coverage of the tournament shall be on Monday, following the Waying of the Wands, and, of course, the First Task!

For more information on Perseus, see page 2-3

For more information on the Demigod conspiracy, see page 4-5

For a comprehensive list of Perseus's criminal actions, see page 6 - 11

For information about Harry Potter's mysterious entry to the tournament, see page 12 - 15

For information on the other Champions, see page 16

I slammed my fist on the table. 'Tell me no one reads this rubbish!'

Hermione looked sheepish. 'Unfortunately, it is the most popular newspaper of Wizarding Britain. Most people take the Prophet's word as truth.'

I sighed, shaking my head. 'One nation controlled by the media,' I quoted. 'Information age of hysteria, calling out to idiot America.'

Ron frowned. 'But we don't live in America.'

Nico sniggered. 'It's a song, dude.' He turned to face me. 'At least you're used to being hated, Perce.'

Harry leaned in. 'It feels sort of nice to know it will be someone else who is hated as well as me. I'm not on my own, y'know? It's also kinda nice to not be on the front page again. Like, I still have four pages insulting me, but not till page 12!''

Hermione frowned. 'It's not, you know, true, is it? I mean, they have enough to fill six pages with just simple descriptions of each crime.'

'Of course not!' I was outraged that she even had to ask.

'Weeeell…' Annabeth drawled.

'OK, OK,' I accepted. 'The events all happened, but, y'know, not how Skeeter was saying.'

Ron frowned. 'So you were a terrorist for good reasons?'

'No!' I sighed. 'You already know about the helicopter. The summer of my twelfth year, I was on a quest to find, uh, a stolen weapon, and was attacked by several monsters, hence the bombings. By the way, 'Aunty Em' was none other than Medusa.'

Hermione gaped. 'As in, snake-haired, turn-you-all-to-stone Medusa?'

I smirked. 'The one, the only, the - for a while - dead, thanks to yours truly.'

Ron gaped. 'You killed Medusa?'

Hermione interrupted before I could respond. 'And what do you mean 'for now'?'

Thankfully, Annabeth answered for me. 'Yes, Ron. Percy chopped her head off. As for your question, Hermione, monsters don't have souls. When they are killed, they return to a pit called Tartarus, where they slowly reform. Depending on their pure will and rage, they reform at different rates. Percy has single-handedly killed the minotaur twice.'

Hermione gaped. 'Twice?'

I rubbed the back of my neck. 'Yeah. The first, when I was twelve, was mostly luck. The second was near the start of last summer.'

'Last summer?' Harry gasped.

'Yeah,' I replied nonchalantly. 'The Titan Kronos was leading an army into New York. We fought him off.'

Annabeth jabbed him in the ribs. 'Don't sound so humble. It was pretty impressive, and nearly singlehanded, too.'

Hermione gaped once more. 'Singlehanded?'

I sighed. 'Yes. Each year, my life has been in danger. Each year, that danger caused a trail of destruction. Now, that is being used to describe me as a terrorist. Happy?'

'I believe you man,' Harry replied. 'That's pretty much my life too, minus the terrorist bit. But I don't think many will.'

'I know,' I groaned. 'That's what I am worried about.'

Nico POV

After our antics at the dinner table, we headed to our first lesson of the day, which, according to Percy, was Potions, with the Slytherins.

At first, I thought I was going to love the lesson. A dark, gloomy dungeon, reminiscent of my father's dungeon, taught by an equally gloomy professor. Then the greasy, old bat spoke.

'I see we have our latest celebrities in with us today. Let's see if you do indeed know your potions,' he sneered. 'Jackson! What do you get if you infuse a potion with shaved Unicorn horn?'

Percy blinked. 'Uh, a glow-in-the-dark potion?'

One of the Slytherin's sniggered. 'What an idiot.'

'Couldn't have said it better myself, Bulstrode. Di Angelo! What do you get if you infuse wormwood with asphodel?'

I knew this one. 'A potion that induces a coma, sir.'

He didn't even reply. 'Chase! Where is a bezoar found?'

Annabeth grinned. 'In the stomach of a goat.'

'Harumph. Everyone get out your books. We are studying antidotes. Collect the necessary ingredients, and start brewing.' He glared at us. 'What are you waiting for?'

There was a scurry to the storage cupboard, before we all sat back down. After meticulously cutting the ingredients, we slowly began adding the ingredients. Well, except Percy. He just dumped them all in.

Ron stared at him. 'Snape's gonna kill you!'

Percy frowned, before his eyes widened in fake horror. 'Oh no, I'm so scared! It's not like I'm micromanaging the potion at a subatomic level and will have a perfect potion in…' he looked at his watch. 'Five minutes.'

Harry gaped at him. 'Really?'

Percy nodded. 'Yup,' he said, popping the 'p'. 'Is that bat always like that?'

Harry frowned. 'With me, yeah, but that's coz he hates my dad. Oh, and with Neville, coz he isn't that great at potions. Everyone else he just snaps at and treats like idiots.'

Percy groaned. 'It's that article, isn't it.' It wasn't a question.

'Don't worry about it,' Ron said. 'Just ignore him and he moves on.'

Percy jumped up at that point. 'It. Is. Done.' He outstretched a hand at his potion, and a small ball of the liquid, the perfect grey colour, levitated out, siphoned off into a crystal vial.

'Oh, Professor!' Percy called out in an overly chipper tone, sauntering to the front. 'Your potion, as requested.

Snape gaped at him. 'Stop this nonsense, Jackson. It hasn't even been ten minutes. The potion clearly requires fifty minutes.'

Percy gave him a cheeky grin. 'Let's just say I have certain advantages.'

With that, he sauntered back to the desk, where he proceeded to wait through the entire lesson, pointedly ignoring the hateful glares coming from Snape.

Well, I know what lesson I will not be looking forward to.

A/N: Ha ha! How were the article? I think I did quite well.

So, as I mentioned in my other fic (HP), I'm now back at college, and so don't have much time on my hands to write. As such, this story will now only update once a month, on the second Monday.

There is a second reason for this: I am doubling the stories I have up. As such, starting October, I will have four monthly stories. I won't reveal what they are yet though! :D

Anyways, please review! Reviews are the fuel for my engine of creativity! Plus, you know, it helps me write better.

Next chapter, first lessons! See you on October 11th! By-ye!