To be frank, the fact that Rey Johnson made it all the way back to her house after The Dumping without having a total breakdown is a remarkable feat.
She walks through the front door of her home, lips trembling but eyes still determinedly dry. But then she smells baking cookies, and Finn is poking his head out from the kitchen and greeting her cheerfully and she just—
Rey finally loses it.
Her breath starts coming quicker and then the tears come, hot and streaming down her face. She tries to cover them, shame making her hiccup on a sob. "F-Finn—"
The cheer on Finn's face is gone in a second and he rushes over to her from the kitchen. "Rey-Rey what's wrong?! What happened?" He gently pries her hands away from her face so that he can look her in the eye. The kindness in his gaze comforts Rey a little; she manages to take in a sharp breath.
"Kaydel b-broke up with me!" The words come out like a wail and Rey begins to weep in earnest. "She g-got a job offer to teach in Scotland and s-she's leaving next week! She s-said—" Rey pauses here to sniff and swipe at her nose with the back of her hand, "—she said it was too good of an opportunity to pass up and that w-we'd had fun but…" Rey trails off here, more tears slipping down her face as she tries to collect herself to no avail.
"Had fun," Finn echoes quietly, already understanding. Every time Rey tries dating someone something like this always ends up happening.
Rey nods, scrubbing at her cheeks with the sleeves of her blue sweater. "She enjoyed the past few months but s-she doesn't see a future with me."
The words ring sad and hollow around their tiny entryway and living room. Rey forces herself to take deep breaths and they whoosh out of her chest in a shudder.
"I'm so, so sorry, Rey-Rey." Finn gives her shoulders a gentle squeeze. "You don't deserve this." He shakes his head and pulls her into a hug. Rey leans into his embrace, trying to reassure herself of the fact that at the end of the day she'll always have this man, her best friend since childhood, her family, her brother. Finn. She sighs into the fabric of his t-shirt and squeezes her eyes shut, and it works. She feels herself marginally relax.
Thing is, Finn can't give her the intimate companionship she longs for in a romantic partner. He's been in a relationship with the same man for nearly three years. Rey watches the way he and his boyfriend love and long for each other. She can't help but want that for herself.
But every time she tries to take love she is denied it, as if the universe has decided she's simply not worthy. And more often than not, as time goes on, Rey is starting to believe it's true. If her own parents could abandon her without a care, maybe there is something wrong with her, maybe there is—
There's muffled shouting coming from the kitchen. Finn and Rey both pull away with each other, Rey looking confused and Finn looking embarrassed. He peers over his shoulder. "Shit. I forgot I was talking to Poe."
He gently pulls away from Rey and hurries toward their kitchen. "Babe! Babe, I'm sorry!"
Rey follows him, pausing to grab tissues from the coffee table so that she can blow her nose and dab at her wet eyes and cheeks.
She is defeated.
Upon entering the kitchen she sees Finn's old laptop sitting on the kitchen island they use for both counter space and a place to eat their meals. Poe peers at her from the laptop screen, looking pleased to see her. "Oh, hey Rey! How's your day going so—"
"Poe," Finn cuts him off, glancing at Rey with worry. "Rey isn't having the best day."
The pleased expression on Poe's face melts into one of concern, but before he can ask Rey sighs. "I got fucking dumped," she grumbles in his direction.
There's a sharp stabbing in her chest, at the yearning place in her soul that hopes to no longer be lonely.
Poe erupts into a stream of reassuring statements and furious accusations that Kaydel is a fool and that Rey deserves someone who chooses her always. Rey nods at him, giving him the most strained smile she can muster up as she goes to stand in front of the oven.
She turns on the oven light so that she can peer at the baking cookies. They look like the M&M kind, her favorite, and Rey could hug Finn all over again. She straightens up and crosses her arms over her chest. "And I took this whole next week off because…" Rey can feel more tears coming on so she pauses, trying to ignore the worried looks coming from both Finn and Poe. "Valentine's Day is coming up so I thought—" Her voice breaks and she shrugs, trying to convey the rest of what she can't quite say. Finn steps up to her and puts a warm hand on her shoulder.
"Rey-Rey…" Finn sighs, rubbing his hand up and down Rey's arm, biting his lip and clearly trying to figure out the best way to continue. "I'm so sorry this is happening. You could take the time to, uh, stay home and get some rest. You can finally just veg out on the couch and binge The Good Place like you keep saying you're going to do!" His lovely, dark-skinned face breaks out into a tentative, small smile for her. "I can hang out with you on my days off! We can stay in and bake, or go to that drag club Lips—"
"Actually…" Poe's voice comes so loudly from the laptop that Finn stops talking to quirk an eyebrow at his boyfriend.
"Actually," Poe repeats, "it was supposed to be a surprise but, I'm planning on flying out tomorrow to surprise you." He looks a little nervous at the shock written all over Finn. Rey's brother has gone totally still.
There's an awkward, charged beat of silence before Poe hesitantly continues.
"I was going to have a housesitter stay here and watch my cat, but considering the circumstances, Rey, would you like to come stay here in LA instead? I'm planning on flying out tomorrow, the 8th, and coming back on the 15th…" Poe finally goes quiet, not sure what to make of the continued silence from both Finn and Rey.
Finn moves to the kitchen island and leans his hands against the edge, peering down at Poe with ever-growing happiness. "You're gonna fly to Jersey to surprise me?" His mouth starts to curl into a grin and Poe returns it, eyes bright with love even through a laptop screen.
Poe nods, beaming. "Yeah. I definitely didn't plan for you to find out this way, but—"
Rey zones out as Poe starts explaining the benefits of her coming and staying at his home. It'll be a getaway, he says. A way for her to escape from her current shitshow of a situation. A way for her to perhaps get a new perspective on things.
There really was no reason for Poe to pitch the benefits of the little switcheroo to her. Rey had made up her mind as soon as he had made the offer.
The truth was she did need to get away. And as she looked at the adoring way that her brother and his boyfriend gazed at each other, so in love despite the obstacles of their long distance relationship, she didn't think she could stomach being around the two of them for a whole week. It would hurt too much. She doesn't have the heart to tell Finn this.
Rey feels raw and wild.
"I'll come stay at your place, getting a plane ticket last minute won't be fun but—"
"I'll cover it," Poe quickly assures her, and she's abruptly reminded of the man's wealth. "It'll be no problem. My place is yours for the week, just keep BB-8 alive," he jokes.
It begins to sink in that Rey is leaving for sunny Los Angeles tomorrow. She feels a tiny spark, just a tiny, itty-bitty happy spark. It's just enough to make her give Poe a small, genuine smile. She sniffs. "Sounds great, Poe."
Rey has doubts when Finn drives her to the airport.
She has doubts in the line for security.
She has doubts on the airplane.
She has doubts in the Uber from LAX to Poe's neighborhood.
Rey even has doubts when the Uber pulls into Poe's driveway. It's not as long as she thought it would be, and she gapes at the size of Dameron's near-mansion sized house. Rey knows he's a successful film editor, and the doubts double down inside her. She's not good, not worthy enough to stay in a place like this. Is she?
But all those lingering doubts ebb away and disappear as soon as she puts the code into the front door, swings it open, and steps into the house. She drops her heavy backpack containing her own laptop and accessories by the front door, taking in her friend's home with wide eyes.
It's huge and colorful and open and a fat, old cat is sitting on the back of the wide, leather couch, glaring at her.
She feels at ease as she walks up to BB-8, let's him sniff her hand and take stock of her. When he's eventually purring and letting her scratch behind his ears, Rey feels her whole body start to ease.
When she finally pulls away so that she can find her room and start unpacking, she's actually confident. This week is going to be great.
"JEALOUSY, TURNING SAINTS INTO THE SEA—"
Poe has bluetooth speakers hooked stealthily into the walls and Rey, totally wine drunk at this point in the evening, is singing into a wooden spatula as she waits for her pizza to cook in the oven. BB-8 watches her with interest from his cat bed in the corner of the kitchen (there's a cat bed in every room), yellow eyes bright and mischievous despite his old age.
Rey had spent the first half hour at the house getting to know the elderly kitty; now he happily follows her from room to room. She's already explored a lot of the house. There are four bedrooms and three and half baths, a movie room and fully stocked bar in the basement, and a pool in the backyard. Rey had stripped down to just her soft, black t-shirt and black panties, popped a pizza into the oven and put on a playlist.
She also opened a bottle of white wine.
Rey has actually managed to put Kaydel from her mind; for the first time in the past twenty-four hours the joy on her face is totally genuine. Poe was right, this is going to be good for her.
"—SWIMMING THROUGH SICK LULLABIES, CHOKING ON YOUR ALIBIS—"
A loud crash from the entryway instantly shuts her up.
"Poe?! Jesus fucking Christ, what the fuck is—why the fuck is there a goddamn backpack in front of the door?!"
Rey fiddles with her phone, shuts the music off right when a large, shirtless man storms into the kitchen where Rey is half naked and clutching a wooden spatula.
He reels back when he sees her. "Who the fuck are you?!" he shouts, deep voice loud in the high ceiling kitchen.
"Who the fuck are you?!" Rey screams back and, without giving too much consideration to the consequences, launches the wooden spatula right at the strange man's head.
It hits him square in the eye.
He yelps in pain and staggers backward a bit before sinking to the floor. One large hand is already covering the eye and he moans, rocking back and forth a bit as if that will help alleviate the pain.
Rey stands posed for a moment, fists raised and teeth bared in case this guy tries anything. But all he does is stay pathetically hunched on the floor.
Some of Rey's adrenaline leaves her and she bites her bottom lip, suddenly feeling a little guilty for having thrown the spatula at him so quickly. She slowly, slowly begins to scoot toward where he's hunched on the kitchen tile, hands tugging at the hem of her suddenly very short and tight shirt. And she's got no pants on. Great.
The closer she gets to him the more she can smell the scent of whiskey oozing out of his pores. It occurs to her that he might be even drunker than she is. She's beginning to think that he's not as intimidating as he first appeared. He clearly knows who Poe is. And he'd been taken down pretty easily with a relatively simple kitchen utensil.
Drunk Rey's instincts are telling her he's harmless.
"Are you okay?" she asks tentatively, poking his bare shoulder with her pointer finger.
"You threw a spatula at me," he grumbles, voice muffled as he talks through one large hand.
Rey sighs. "Pull your hand away, lemme see."
Huffing and mumbling something under his breath she's sure is far from polite, the drunk man lowers his hand and glares up at her, mouth turning down. His right eye is red and teary, and there's already bruising forming underneath it. Rey winces and his mouth turns down even further into a full fledged scowl. "It's going to be a black eye, isn't it?"
Rey nods, cringing.
The man lets out a deep, subdued sigh, before slowly getting to his feet and standing up.
He...he looms over her; Rey hadn't realized how tall he truly was through the haze of her earlier adrenaline and drunkenness. Her gaze flicks over his bare, wide shoulders down to his expansive chest and muscled stomach. She hasn't dated many guys in the past, but men like this (human refrigerators) are precisely her type. Swallowing, she can already feel her face begin to heat up for reasons way beyond the wine.
The man groans, pinches the bridge of his nose. "Well, I guess I can't really blame you. I sorta barged in here unannounced, didn't I?" He's slurring his words, just a little bit. "Poe isn't here. Clearly." His eyes, both injured and uninjured, narrow at her in curiosity. "Who are you?"
"The housesitter," Rey answers cooly. "Poe is visiting his boyfriend, my roommate, this week for Valentine's, so." She shrugs, feeling embarrassed and still very half naked. "He suggested we switch and I stay at his place while he's gone. Anyway, who are you, strange-man-who-just-walked-the-fuck-in?" Her question comes out huffy, which is good, considering he should've already explained without her having to ask.
He takes in the way she's got her hands propped in her hips in demand, the way Rey's shirt hugs her breasts and waist. Despite not wearing a bra, at least her nipples aren't visible through the black fabric, but his eyes briefly linger like they are. Then his gaze dips down to her visible panties and long, smooth legs. His eyes grow more heated and he clears his throat before looking back up at her face.
"I'm Ben. The neighbor and annoying best friend since, uh, childhood." He sticks out his hand for a shake. "What's your name, housesitter?"
Rey accepts his outstretched hand, marvelling briefly at the way it totally engulfs her own. They're as big as his whole fucking face.
"Rey Johnson," she blurts out quickly, face flushing even more at her eagerness.
He quirks a dark eyebrow at her. "Is that all one word?"
"No, no no." Rey laughs awkwardly. "First name is Rey." It does not go unnoticed by her that he has yet to let go of her hand. "Last name is, uh, Johnson."
Ben nods down at her, black hair sticking to his forehead. The night is warm and Rey feels a hot twisting in her belly at the way he's looking at her. Like he wants to push her ankles behind her ears and swallow her from the inside out.
Rey gulps and finally, finally drops his hand from her own. "So, uh, Ben. Do you want a drink? I have...wine. And water, I guess."
Ben's mouth tilts up a bit in an expression that could almost be a smile. "There are sodas in the pantry."
"Oh! Did you want a soda?"
"No. Wine is fine."
While Rey is topping off her glass and pouring Ben one of his own, he peppers her with questions. Will she be here the whole week? Yes. How does she know Poe, again? He's dating her roommate slash brother. What does she do for a living? She and Finn remodel houses, basically.
And then: "What made you decide to come stay here?" He's already killed half his glass of wine by now. The eye that didn't get smacked with a wooden spatula is now just as red as the one that did.
Rey takes a slow, long drag from her own glass, attempting to avoid answering as long as she can. Finally, she puts down her drink, swaying a little on her feet and frowning. "My girlfriend dumped me."
Ben winces appropriately. "That sucks." He shakes his head. "Whatadumbass." He's slurring even more than he was before, so his words come out sticking together.
"Yeah," Rey nods, tucking her hair behind her ear and taking in the way Ben's gaze has drifted down to her bare legs again. "Um, actually…" She clears her throat and steps away from the kitchen island so that she's standing directly in front of him. "I have an idea."
He tilts his head. "Hmm?"
"It's really stupid."
"Hit me with it." Then he laughs a little too loudly. "Actually, please don't—"
"I think we should have sex," the words tumble out of her mouth without another moment of hesitation. Ben goes still and is quiet for so long Rey wonders if in her drunken state she said the words out of order.
When she chances a glance up at his face she finds him staring down at her in wide eyed shock, mouth forming a comical 'o'.
He slides a step back from her, eyes turning away for a moment before he finally looks back at her. "N-No thank you."
Ben says something else, but Rey doesn't catch it because of the loud roaring suddenly echoing throughout her head.
Why did I ask that that was so stupid I'm so stupid why on earth would he want me no one ever truly wants me stupid stupid stupid—
The sound of Ben hurling into the kitchen sink breaks her out of her fog of thoughts.
Apparently the wine hit him a little too hard.
Rey stares at the muscles bunching in his hunched back as he strains over the sink, but soon the unpleasant splattering noises and smell have her hurrying from the kitchen and out into the wider space of Poe's house.
She starts laughing.
And then Rey stumbles to the living room, grabs her backpack, and starts repacking.