No, I don't own Naruto.
Kakashi knew what he was expecting when he showed up at Training Ground 3 that morning. He'd read the files on genins Uzumaki Naruto, Haruno Sakura, and Uchiha Sasuke and met them briefly yesterday. The answers to his simple questions had revealed a lot on the personalities of the three. But what he saw when he reached the training grounds was nothing like he expected.
Because it looked less like a training ground and more like an outdoor party. Streamers were strewn in the tree branches, balloons were hung everywhere, a table covered in an assortment of delicious pastries and a punch bowl sat proudly on the edge of the clearing. Kakashi thought of tasting the pastries, but decided to avoid the punch due to to the small, purple-eyed bright green alligator floating within it. He'd have guessed it was a toy if not for it occasionally blinking as it floated there.
Turning from the table, he looked for his students, finding each in turn quickly enough. First his eyes landed on Uzumaki Naruto, who was rapidly gobbling down food, a rather large stack of plates sitting near him indicating he'd already eaten quite a lot. Though still dressed in orange, instead of his jumpsuit it was a sleeveless orange gi top over a short-sleeved blue shirt and orange pants, with a white circle bearing the kanji for Kame-Sennin Ryuu on the left breast over the heart. He also had on a pair of dark blue wristbands, dark blue boots with yellow laces, and a red staff strapped to his back in what appeared to be a specially-made sheath. And was that... Yes, yes, it indeed was a brown monkey's tail that was waving around behind Naruto as he ate.
Next he caught sight of Sakura, who was standing with a plate of food from the table. She, too was dressed in the same color red as yesterday, except now it was in the form a sleeveless muscle shirt, with a pair of light, loose pants tucked into a pair of black boots, and a dark sash tied around her waist. Over her hair was a black bandana, and draped over her shoulders was a long-sleeved Captain's coat with a black cross under a white circle outlined in black. Near her, with the blade stabbed into the ground, was a bisento.
Finally, and most disturbingly, was Sasuke, who seemed to have done a complete 180 from the day before as he pushed a large, bright blue cannon with pink wheels before him. He was dressed in short-sleeved, short-legged bright pink coveralls with what appeared to be three balloons (a yellow balloon with blue on either side of it) sewn on both hip pockets and a pair of equally bright pink ninja sandals. But unlike Naruto and Sakura, even his physical appearance seemed to have changed. Every ounce of the dark, broody nature seemed to have left him, leaving him much brighter in appearance, with his hair now being a rather poofy afro with a single bang sticking out before his face, and his eyes wide and expressive without a hint of the former darkness within them.
Kakashi stared at the scene for several moments before bringing his hands into a seal and saying "Kai!"
The scene remained as it had been before, and several more attempts to break a possible genjutsu failed. so Kakashi walked cautiously into the clearing and called out "Yo!" while lifting a hand in greeting.
At once the music silenced and the trio turned to Kakashi as Sakura and Naruto yelled in unison "YOU'RE LATE!"
"Yeah Kakashi-sensei, you're late for the stupenderiffic "Welcome to Team 7" party!" Sasuke replied with a bright smile.
"Riiiiight..." Kakashi muttered, forcing a smile back on his face as he continued "Well, today we're going to test to see if you're worthy of being shinobi of Konoha."
"What?! But we already passed the genin exam!" Sakura cried, but Kakashi wagged his finger as he said "Uh uh uh, Sakura, you merely passed the exam that allowed you the CHANCE to see if you're worthy of being Genin by completing a test. That's what we're gonna be doing today with a little something I like to call 'the bell test'." With that said, he reached into a pocket and pulled out a pair of small bells attacked to strings.
"You three have until noon to retrieve these bells from me, and if you fail all three of you will be sent back to the academy." Kakashi replied with a smile.
"Uh, Kakashi-sensei, why are there only two bells?" Sakura asked, and Kakashi replied as he stuck the bells to his waist "Because only two of you can become Genin. The one who doesn't get a bell gets tied to one of the three posts and gets sent back to the academy to try again next year."
"WHAT?! But that means I'd lose one or both of my new friends!" Sasuke said, his eyes growing larger as tears welled in them.
"Yeah, well, life's not really fair." Kakashi said with a sigh, looking away from the unsettling sight of the formerly stoic Uchiha giving him a teary version of the puppy dog eyes.
"Anyways, I want you to come at me with intent to-" Kakashi began, but suddenly stopped when he looked at Naruto. He wasn't sure why, but something about Naruto made him not want to actually tell them to come at him with 'intent to kill'. He may not have known why, but his years of experience taught him to trust these feelings.
"Intent to capture the bells." Kakashi said, giving the trio an uneasy eyesmile before setting a timer and placing it on the middle post.
"Alright, begi-" Kakashi was cut off by Naruto's elbow embedding itself in his gut. However, instead of Kakashi being sent flying away, it was a shattered log, which slammed into a tree and fell to the ground.
"... Where'd Kakashi-sensei go?" Naruto asked, looking for the silver-haired man. Who at the moment was sitting in the branches of a tree, staring at the orange-clad blonde in utter shock.
'Ho-how? How did Naruto move that fast?! Only Gai can move that fast using the Gates!' Kakashi thought. He was so focused on Naruto he didn't notice the shadow rising up behind him.
"FOUND YOU KAKASHI-SENSEI!"
Kakashi cried out in shock and leapt from his hiding spot, turning to see a broadly smiling Sasuke had somehow snuck up behind him and was currently waving excitedly to him. Landing on the ground, he barely managed to duck as a leg flew over his head, and he dove forward as a bisento blade sliced through where he'd been standing moments before, Kakashi feeling the ground rumble as the blade hit the ground. Finishing his roll, Kakashi was forced to dodge a rapid-fire flurry of punches from Naruto, avoiding each punch by the narrowest of margins.
Finally finding a spot to break away, Kakashi leapt from Naruto, only to be forced to use kawarimi to avoid another stike from Sakura's bisento, which neatly cleaved the log in two. But this brought no respite, as Sasuke attacked him with a pair of spatulas. Incredibly sharp spatulas, considering the cuts decorating his Jounin vest. As Kakashi escaped from the pink Sasuke's assault, he performed a quick shunshin, hiding within the forest hoping to catch his breath. However, unlike last time, he kept his eyes on Sasuke, not wanting him to pop up behind him again.
'What the Hell happened to them last night?!' Kakashi wondered. These were not the same adorable little genin he'd met yesterday. No, something had to of happened to them, resulting in them becoming like this. Sighing, he did something he never expected to have to do with three green genin. He lifted his hitai-ate, revealing his Sharingan.
Unfortunately, doing this required him to take his eyes off Sasuke for a few moments, which he realized when said pink-clad Uchiha was not where he'd previously been standing. Spinning around, Kakashi looked behind him, only to find himself alone.
"What're we looking for Kakashi-sensei?" Sasuke asked, pressed against Kakashi's back and looking over his shoulder. Kakashi paled and vanished with another shunshin, leaving Sasuke holding a log, which he tossed away with a shrug before skipping happily back to the clearing.
Reappearing in the clearing, Kakashi saw Naruto and Sakura watching him carefully across from him, and was soon joined by Sasuke. Taking a deep breath and releasing it slowly, Kakashi tilted his head to the side as a punch passed through where it had been moments before. Tilting it the other way allowed him to avoid a second punch from the blonde before him, who grinned as he watched the man with a red eye decorated with three tomoes who was now avoiding his punches much easier than before.
Watching the blonde carefully, Kakashi struck out as Naruto was preparing another punch and knocked him away, only for Naruto to be replaced by Sakura, who began attacking with a series of swings and thrusts using her bisento. Weaving around her swings, Kakashi noticed a slight bubble of something around the blade of the bisento, and knew that allowing it to hit him would be a terrible idea. After dodging another downward swing of the polearm, he moved forward and delivered a rapid series of blows to Sakura, a final kick sending her away from him as well.
Turning to Sasuke, Kakashi's eyes widened in shock as he saw the cannon the currently pink-clad Uchiha had been wheeling around aimed at him, and not wanting to be hit with whatever it did, performed a kawarimi as it fired with a great BOOM. He watched as the log he'd replaced himself with was pelted by brightly colored ball bearings and equally whimsically colored bits of jagged metal, tearing the wood to shreds. Turning to Sasuke, he noticed that the cannon also seemed to have released confetti and streamers along with it's destructive payload, considering it was littering the ground before it.
Wiping a small trickle of blood off his chin, Naruto grinned as he said "Not bad Kakashi-sensei! I was beginning to think you were weak. Now, let's take it to the next level!"
Bringing his arms up, he swung them down with a battlecry, and Kakashi could only stare in shock as energy erupted from the blonde, blowing dust and small rocks into the air from the pressure of it. Watching the energy radiate from the blonde, Kakashi could feel a sense of dread filling him as Sakura's biceps seemed to bulge, and Sasuke's smile turned rather sinister.
'Oh Hell...' Kakashi thought as the sense of dread filled him once more.
Kakashi, bloodied, bruised, and tied to the middle of the three posts, groaned as he slowly lifted his head off his chest to look at the three students standing before him. Naruto had his arms crossed over his chest with a smirk, Sakura was giving him a rather smug grin, and Sasuke's smile was once more bright and cheerful, having lost every hint of it's previous sinister nature.
"So, Kakashi-sensei, do we pass?" Naruto asked as he held the two bells for the Jounin to see. Kakashi felt a momentary temptation to say no so he wouldn't have to seen any of them ever again, but it was brutally squashed as the sense of dread made its presense known at the possible reactions of the trio standing before him.
"...Yes. Congratulations, you three are now Genin of Konohagakure no Sato." Kakashi said, and the trio let out cries of victory, with Sasuke cartwheeling around his teammates and the posts.
Finishing his cartwheel with a joyous leap, Sasuke cried "We've gotta have a party with all the other passing genin teams! I'll start passing out the invitations!"
Turning to Kakashi, Sasuke brandished one of his sharpened spatulas and with a swing sliced through the ropes holding him down before holding out a plate containing a large cupcake decorated with bright pink frosting, a rainbow of sprinkles, and a plastic Konoha leaf on top.
Warily taking the cupcake from Sasuke, Kakashi said "Thanks."
"You're welcome! See you at the Par-tay Kakashi-sensei!" Sasuke said before taking off with an insane burst of speed, followed quickly by Sakura and Naruto. Picking up the cupcake off the plate, Kakashi sniffed it carefully before shrugging and taking a bite while somehow not removing his mask.
"Mmm, this is good." Kakashi said, and continued eating as he comforted himself with a single thought that made everything better.
At least those three were now on HISside.
This fic was inspired by Legendary Legacy's "A Freak, A Creep, and A Psychopath" which in turn was based on Akun50's "Unique Power-ups" challenge on TFF. Unfortunately, due to not being a member of TFF, I couldn't see the challenge personally, so I went by his fic.
And for those worried about my other fics, don't worry, I'll get to them soon. I'm just lazy and I had to start this fic to get myself motivated to start write again. I'll get to work on my other fics... Soon. I promise.
As for whose who:
Naruto - Goku from DBZ
Sakura - Edward "Whitebeard" Newgate from One Piece
Sasuke - Pinkamena Diana Pie, AKA "Pinkie Pie" from My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic