All or Nothing
Chapter 1: Tough Decisions
Castiel Novak yawned as he exited the hospital, after a sixteen hour shift. He was eager to get home and pass out, before he had to come back and do it all again.
He was an ER nurse in New York City. It was a fast paced life. It was fast paced like, nothing like the life he had left behind. He had followed his high school sweetheart, Hannah Johnson, to the big city. She had been an aspiring actress. The two had dated for years, even going as far as becoming engaged. Everything fell apart when Hannah took things to far to get a part. She had slept with a director. He had walked in on her with him, in their bed. His heart had broken. He had kicked her out. It had been a few months now, and he hadn't told his family yet. He wasn't sure what to tell them.
He hailed a cab. He gave the driver his address as his phone rang. He answered his phone as his sisters name flashed across the screen.
"Hello Anna," he greeted his sister.
"What the hell Cas? I've been trying to get a hold of you," She replied.
"I just got off a sixteen hour shift in the ER," he replied.
"Sorry," she apologized, "we've all been trying to get a hold of you."
"What's wrong?" He asked sensing the sadness in her voice.
"Cas gramma Hessie isn't doing too good," she said slowly.
"Anna-"
"Cas you and Hannah need to visit. This might be your last chance to see her," she said quickly.
"Ok, but it'll only be me," He replied.
"Come on Cas, is Hannah that busy? She can't take a few days off," Anna asked.
"I actually don't know how busy she is. We aren't together anymore," he admitted.
"What? When did this happen? What happened?" she asked shocked.
"Apparently Hannah valued her career more than our relationship," he replied coolly.
"Ouch, all the more reason to come home for a visit," she replied.
Castiel sighed, she was right. He was due for a visit home, but things were so crazy. Almost as if she knew what he was thinking, she continued talking, using the magic words to break him.
"Besides, Claire misses her uncle Cas," she said.
"Don't play the Claire card," Castiel groaned. His cab came to a stop. He quickly paid the driver and got out of the cab. He cradled his phone between his shoulder. He made his way into his apartment building. "Anna I want to, work is crazy."
"Castiel work is always crazy for you, you work in an ER in New York," she dead panned.
She wasn't wrong. He was just making excuses right now. It he was being honest, he was afraid to go home and admit defeat. He had gone to New York wanting to prove his family wrong. Him and Hannah had taken off after college together. They had spent a year in a small studio apartment with one of Hannah's college friends. He had finished nursing got school, and got a job at the ER. Hannah started getting jobs off Broadway and things started looking up. The two had finally gotten their own apartment. Things had never been better, until he had caught Hannah with another man, two months ago. He had been so ashamed that he hadn't told anyone back home yet.
"Cas," Anna said bringing him from his thought.
"Ok I'll do it," he said.
"What?" She asked shocked.
"I'm coming home for a visit," he said.
-Supernatural-
Dean Winchester sighed as he pulled up to his grandmother, Deanna Campbell, house. He stepped out of his Impala. He made his way up the front walk. He didn't bother knocking, he didn't have to.
"Grandma De?" He called out.
"In here!" Deanna called out.
He made his way to the living room. Deanna was standing before her wall of pictures. There were at lest fifty or sixty pictures that adorned the wall. They were all of family. Of Dean and his younger brother Sam when they were babies. Being her only grandchildren, she had gone a bit crazy with the pictures.
"Something wrong?" He asked joining her. He stared at the wall trying to see what she saw.
"It's crooked," she said.
"What?"
He focused for a moment before he saw it. He walked over to the wall and straightened the pictures for her. She let out a small laugh.
"Thank you Dean," she declared. She hugged him and gave him a kiss on the cheek. She made a face. "You smell like a grease monkey."
"I am a grease monkey, Bobby gave me a job for the summer," he laughed.
"Right, so what are you doing here?" she asked eyeing him suspiciously.
"Mom and dad wanted to know if you wanted to come to dinner tonight. I've come to collect you," he replied.
"Of course, ever since your-" she started.
"Grandpa died they worry about you too much," he finished for her.
She smiles affectionately at him. "Have I mentioned your my favorite?"
"Just don't tell Sam right?" He chuckled knowing she told Sam the same thing.
"Our secret," she said. She turned back to her wall. She pursed her lips. "It's crooked."
"I just fixed it, come on let's go to dinner," he said, his smile falling.
"Your parents are gonna put me in an early grave with all this worrying," she muttered. She left the living room.
Dean followed her. He grabbed her coat and helped her put it on, even though it was the middle of summer. He helped her out to his Impala. Deanna pulled a face again.
"I remember when your dad bought this god awful thing," she said.
Dean gasped and petted the car. "She didn't mean it baby!"
"Men and cars, I'll never understand," She chuckled patting his cheek. She made a face again. "You smell like a grease monkey."
"I should, I took a job with Bobby at his auto shop," He replied.
He helped her into the car. The drive was spent with Deanna talking about how much she hated that John and Mary worried about her, and that Dean smelled like grease.
Once Dean got Deanna into the house with Mary, he left to shower. He didn't miss the comment about him smelling like a grease monkey again.
After his shower, he was getting dressed when Sam entered his room. Dean just glared at his younger brother. Sam didn't seem fazed at all.
"Dude, you have to come down and talk to grandma, I can only listen to her stories for so long," Sam whined.
"Sam that's grandma, she's getting forgetful, but she's still grandma and we have to take care of her," Dean said.
"I know...I just can't hear the same story again. I'm gonna pull my hair out," Sam sighed.
"Good, you need a haircut anyways," Dean quipped. Sam just rolled his eyes.
The pair made their way downstairs. They were greeted with the sight of Bobby Singer, and his wife; Ellen, and her daughter; Jo. They greeted the boys.
"Bobby Singer, you smell like a grease monkey," Dean joked.
"I see you've been talking to Dede," Bobby replied with a chuckle.
"She tells me the same thing," Dean said taking a seat next to him.
"Where is grandma De?" Sam asked.
"She insisted on helping your mother cook," Ellen replied.
The four settled into conversation. Dean and Bobby started talking about work, while Ellen, Jo, and Sam talked about their college classes.
"Dean you should take note of Sam here," Ellen said.
"I'm taking some classes online," Dean said defensively. "I'm no lawyer, but maybe I'll figure it out eventually."
"You can always take over the auto shop," Bobby said.
"Don't listen to him Dean, you've got your whole future ahead of you," Ellen said quickly, "besides I think Jo's got her eyes on the family business."
"You better not hand it over to Dean old man, I've been working my ass off to get the business degree, beside I know more about cars than half your employees," Jo said pointing a finger at Bobby. Bobby put his hands up with a smile.
"It's called co-owners," Dean quipped, knowing it annoyed Jo. She just glared at him.
"So, if you guys are here, does that mean mom and dad wanna try and convince grandma to go to the nursing home?" Sam asked softly.
"Sam," Ellen sighed.
"I know, it's not me you gotta convince," Sam said looking to Dean.
"She doesn't want to go. We can't force her," Dean said, frowning.
-Supernatural-
Castiel arrived at his old family home in Lawrence Kansas. The small two story house was the same as he remembered. He wasn't sure what kind of dog out he was walking into. He wasn't sure what Anna had told the other's of his shocking revelation.
Castiel walked up to the front door. He rang the doorbell and waited. The door opened to reveal Anna. She smiled at him and threw her arms around him in a hug.
"I thought your flight was later," She said.
"I caught an earlier flight," he replied.
Anna pulled him inside calling out to their parents. She led him to the kitchen where their mother, Naomi, was busy chopping vegetables. She looked up from her work with a smile.
"I thought you were landing later," Naomi said wiping her hands on the rag beside her. She walked around the island to give him a hug.
"I got an earlier flight," He said again.
"Anna told me about Hannah, honey I'm so sorry. She always seemed like such a good girl," Naomi said.
"Did I hear that Castiel is here?"
Castiel turned and greeted his stepfather, Chuck Shurley. Chuck smiled and gave him a hug.
"Welcome home son."
"What's with all the food? Are you having a party or something?" Castiel asked as Chuck walked around the island trying to steal some food. Naomi swatted his hand with a stern look.
"Yes, it's not often we get the whole family together," Naomi replied with a smile.
"Let me go get settled in and I can come help," Castiel offered.
"Don't worry about it, this party is for you. Besides Anna is here to help," Naomi said looking to her youngest.
"I know, but you're making such a big fuss of this, I feel obligated to help," he replied.
"Ok, go out your things in your room," Naomi said knowing it was no good arguing with him.
Castiel left the kitchen. He grabbed his bag which he had left at the door. He made his way up stairs to his old bedroom. He walked into the room and it was like stepping into the past.
Not much had changed. His old posters still adorned the wall. His awards and trophies sat on the book shelf collecting dust. Naomi had always talked about turning the extra rooms into guest rooms, but as never could do it. Castiel was sure it was because she wanted her kids to have a place to stay when they visited. She wanted them to feel at home when they visited. In a sense he did feel like he was home.
He sat down on the bed for a moment, just soaking it all in. He was home. It felt nice to just be back in this house. It only made him realize that he had made the right decision by coming home.
"Cassie!"
Castiel looked up and saw his older stepbrother, Gabriel, standing in the doorway. He grinned as he walked into the room. He pulled Castiel to his feet and gave him a hug.
"Hello Gabriel, I have missed you too," Castiel said.
"I'm glad you found some time to visit," Gabriel said his smile growing.
"Me too, I've needed this," Castiel replied.
"Moms wondering where you went," Gabriel said pointing over his shoulder.
"I told her I was gonna help," Castiel stated, "I just...got caught up in my own head."
"You need to stop over thinking things Cassie," Gabriel replied.
"You know I hate that name," Castiel groaned.
"Yeah, but you love me, and won't really harm me too much," Gabriel teased as he took off from the room.
Castiel made his way back down to the kitchen. He heard voices from within. He smiled as he recognized the voice of his seven year old niece, Claire. He entered the kitchen. She had her back to him. His twin brother; Jimmy, and his wife; Amelia, noticed him first. They both smiled, but didn't say a word.
"Claire-bear, where's my hug?"
Claire whipped around, her blonde hair whipping around her. Her grin was huge. She ran over to Castiel.
"Uncle Cas!"
He caught her in a hug lifting her up and spinning her around. She was getting so big. The last time Castiel had seen her had been her birthday last year. She had another coming up soon. He hated that he had missed so much of her life.
"You live so far away and barely visit and you're still the brats favorite uncle," Gabriel replied bitterly.
"I thought you weren't landing until later," Jimmy said.
"I got an earlier flight," he repeated.
"So when do Lou and Kelly show up? Isn't this a family reunion?" Gabriel asked.
"They should be here soon," Naomi said checking the time.
"Uncle Cas, you have to see what grandpa Chuck and I made," Claire said tugging at Castiel's arm.
He glanced at Naomi who made a shooing motion to him. He allowed his niece to drag him from the room. She led him to the back yard. There was a small fort built out of plywood and two by fours.
"What's this?" He asked.
"It's fort Claire, grandpa and I built it together," she said.
"Wow, looks like fun," he said.
"It is." She pulled him towards the fort.
Castiel spent the afternoon playing with Claire. She showed him the rest of her fort. They played in the back yard, and had fun. Eventually Lou and Kelly showed us with Jack, their ten year old son. He joined in the games and fun with the two. He was happy to see Castiel too.
Eventually Naomi called them in for dinner. Castiel helped the two wash up. They joined everyone in the dining room. The table was full of food and everyone was talking and laughing.
"Castiel, it's so good to see you," Kelly said greeting him.
"Yeah, we didn't get a chance to talk, the kids had you busy," Lou said.
"Yeah we had fun, right Claire? Jack?" He asked the two.
"Lots of fun," Jack said. Claire nodded her head eagerly.
Dinner continued with light hearted conversation. Everyone was catching up and chatting. Eventually the kids were excused and the rest of the family cleared the table and moved to the living room.
"So Cas, how are things in New York, aside from..." Lou trailed off.
"Who didn't you tell Anna?" Castiel asked looking to his sister.
"I only told mom and Gabe," Anna said quickly.
"Your mother told me," Chuck said.
"Gabe told me," Jimmy and Lou chorused together. Kelly and Amelia pointed to their husbands.
"Wow good news travels fast," Castiel said.
"Look Cas we're sorry, none of us saw this coming. Hannah didn't seem the type," Gabriel said.
"There were signs but I was too blind to see them at the time. I caught her with one if her directors," Castiel said.
"Whoa, so you kicked her to the curb right?" Gabriel asked.
"I asked her to leave, and I haven't heard from her since," he shrugged.
"Good, she doesn't deserve you," Anna chimed in quickly. The rest of the family agreed.
"So what are you gonna do now?" Amelia asked curiously.
"Actually, I've been thinking about moving back here," Castiel said slowly.
"Are you serious?" Anna asked shocked.
"What?" Lou asked confused.
"Do it!" Gabriel declared.
"About time." Jimmy said happily.
Castiel looked at his siblings with a smile. He knew they would love nothing more than to have him close again. If he was being honest, he wanted it too. There was nothing tying him to New York anymore. He had gone there for Hannah.
"Honey don't be rash," Naomi said cutting the other four off.
"I'm not, I only went to New York to be with Hannah. Any friends I made were her friends. Here I have you guys, and I'll get to see the kids more than a couple times a year. I mean Jack is so big," he said looking to Lou and Kelly. "Claire is shooting up too. I really do miss spending time with everyone. I don't want to miss anymore."
"Honey this is still a big decision and there's so much you need to do," Naomi said, "of course you can stay here for as long as you need."
"I've already done a bulk of the work mom, I've already been looking online at apartments in the area and I've got a few job interviews set up," Castiel replied.
"You always were thorough," Lou commented.
"I just can't go back to New York, there are too many reminders of Hannah," he admitted.
"Cas, you are more than welcome to stay a long as you need," Chuck said.
"Well not to over shadow Castiel's news, Amelia and I have some news as well," Jimmy said looking to his wife.
"Are you guys pregnant?" Anna asked.
"Well I am," Amelia replied with a smile.
Everyone gasped and congratulated the happy couple. Jimmy and Amelia answered any questions that were had. Claire eventually joined them telling them how happy she was to be a big sister.
-Supernatural-
Dean sighed as he followed Sam. They were at Golden Living Healthcare Services. It was a nursing home. Deanna had finally given in. She was being moved at the movement. John and Mary were already with her. Sam and Dean were in charge of gathering things from her home to make it feel more homelike.
"This is wrong," Dean said shaking his head.
"Dean it's for the best, grandma agrees too," Sam replied, "besides Jeas works here. She'll make sure gram gets great care."
"Ooh Sammy's girlfriend works here," Dean cooed sarcastically.
"Whatever come on," Sam said. He made his way into the building.
Dean followed suit. They entered the lobby. There was a day room, with a TV showing the daytime games shows. A few people milled about talking or watching the TV. Others were working on jigsaw puzzles or visiting with family. There were a few who were just sitting there staring into space. Next to the front desk was a large bird cage that house colorful birds. Upon looking around Dean realized that there were four separate hallways, that seemed to have rooms down them.
Dean quickened his pace to keep up with Sam. They walked up to the front desk, where a blonde woman I. Her late forties sat talking on the phone. Her name tag read, Sheila. She smiled at them and held a finger up. She quickly finished her conversation and hung up.
"How can I help you boys?" She asked.
"We're looking for our grandma, Deanna Campbell," Sam said.
"Yes, she is in getting settled in right now. She is in 206 down south hall, that way," Sheila said pointing in a direction of the birdcages.
"Thank you," Sam said. He led Dean away from the front desk.
"I don't like it," Dean said quietly as they walked along. "It smells like old people."
"Will you stop it?" Sam asked turning to face Dean. "Don't knock it until you get to know the place. I told you, Jess works here, she won't let anything bad happen to grandma."
"I know...just this was never the plan Sammy, she never wanted this. She only agreed cause mom, dad, Bobby, and Ellen cornered her," Dean sighed.
"We're here," Sam said pointing to a doorway. The number 206 was on a plate next to the door, with Deanna Campbell on it already, and a picture of Deanna with Sam and Dean there too.
The two knocked on the door and entered. They saw John and Mary talking with Deanna, who was sitting in a recliner.
"Boys," John said greeting his sons.
"Sam, Dean," Deanna said smiling. She sold and greeted her grandsons with a hug and a kiss to the cheek.
"We brought some things from home," Dean said lifting the bag he was holding. "You know to make this place feel homey."
"As homey as you can get in a place that smells like old people," Deanna said quietly.
"Mom," Mary said shocked.
"Dean just said the same thing," Sam laughed.
"You are your grandma's kid," John chuckled.
Sam and Dean moved about setting up Deanna's pictures and knock knacks. She helped place things. Dean pulled out her quilt from the bag.
"Oh Dean, thank you," Deanna said with a smile. Dean places it over the back of the chair, like he knew she like it.
"So have you gotten a tour of the place yet?" Sam asked looking to John and Mary.
"Not yet, they were letting us get her settled," Mary said.
"Fancy talk for its shift change and no one wanted to," John replied, earning a nudge in the side from Mary. He just grinned at his wife.
"I hear you folks are looking to get a tour of the place," a familiar female voice chimed from behind them.
"Jess," Sam said turning around with a smile.
"Is that Jessica Moore I hear?" Deanna asked. She walked over to the doorway and greeted the smiling blonde girl with a hug.
"Hi Dede," Jess said with a big smile. "I hear that you're staying here now?"
"Yes, I think it's what's best for now," Deanna replied. "Do you work here? Are you a nurse yet?"
"Almost, I'm a CNA, I'm taking my basic classes first and saving up to take the nursing program in a year or two," Jess said, "but for now I'll be your tour guide."
"Great, thank you dear," Deanna said with a smile. She beckoned the rest of the family to follow her.
Jess showed the Winchester clan around the nursing home, answering any questions they had. They were shown the dining room, the family rooms, the barber shop, and even the therapy building.
"Wow this place is huge," Sam commented as they made their way back to Deanna's room.
"Yes, and at capacity we can have sixty five residents. We are currently at fifty nine I believe," Jess said slowly.
"Do I make sixty?" Deanna asked playfully.
"Actually I think so," Jess laughed. "Dede you'll like it here, the other residents are friendly and there are lots of activities. I will make sure this transition goes smoothly."
"Thank you Jess," Deanna said
smiling at the blonde girl. She turned to Sam. "Sammy she's a keeper."
Sam's face turned red, "grandma!"
"Oh it's ok Dede, we're working on it. Sam wants to be done with college before we take that step."
"Why wait?" Deanna asked.
"Mom, you're not seriously suggesting that my nineteen year old son get married," Mary said looking pointedly at Deanna.
"You were married at eighteen, I was twenty. I don't see anything wrong with marrying young, as long as it's for love, which these two have," Deanna said. She turned to look at Sam and Jess, and saw they were gone.
"They bolted a few minutes ago," Dean chuckled. "I think all the marriage talk freaked them out."
"Well ok, mom I've got the late shift at work so we gotta go. We will be back tomorrow to see you," Mary said giving Deanna a hug. Her and John moved to leave.
"Hey, give Sammy a ride. I'm gonna stay here a bit longer," Dean said. John nodded his head the two left.
Deanna took a seat in her recliner. Dean grabbed his knitting bag and pulled up a chair. He gave her the bag. She smiled at him.
"Thank you, you always know what I need before I do," Deanna said.
"That's cause I'm a mind reader, and you're a person of habit," Dean replied.
"When are you gonna settle down?" Deanna asked as she grabbed her latest knitting project.
"When I find the right person," Dean shrugged.
"First there was Lisa and I thought you two were meant to be, but after Ben..." Deanna said.
"Lisa and I fell apart before Ben was born. We are better if friends," Dean said shaking his head. He knew Deanna, and Mary both wanted to see him and Lisa together, but it just wasn't gonna happen. Him and Lisa were better off friends.
"What about Benny? What ever happened to him?" She asked curiously.
"Benny and I were never dating," he said, "it was...complicated."
"Complicated?" She questioned.
"I'm into guys and Benny found out he wasn't as into them as I was," Dean shrugged.
"Oh, I suppose that would put a damper on things," she mused quietly.
"How did you know you loved grandpa?" Dean asked.
"Honey, love had nothing to do with it. Back in my day people rarely got married for love," she replied, "that not to say I didn't care about Samuel, I guess I learned to love him."
"Dating sucks," he sighed.
"You'll find someone, just don't settle for less than you deserve my boy," she said.
"And what do I deserve?" he questioned, arching a brow at her.
"The world my boy, you deserve everything. Despite what everyone things you are an amazingly kind person and you will find the right person when the time is right," she said.
He smiled at her. No one understood him like she did. He had the whole world fooled, but he couldn't fool her. He was just like her in many ways.
Dean has spent a good portion of his childhood with at her house. He was always helping her. They always gossiped about their lives together. He loved her like his mother. It was probably why he was so against her being in the nursing home.
"So I heard that Diane Johnson was here," Deanna said after awhile.
"You mean crazy cat lady Diane?" He asked with a smile.
"That's the one, I heard she broke her hip. I haven't talked to her in quite awhile," she mused.
"Wanna take a walk?" he asked.
"I thought you'd never ask," she replied.
"Well let's go." He jumped up and grabbed her knitting. He set it carefully back into his bag. He offered her his arm. She smiled and helped herself up.
Dean spent the rest of his night with her. He wanted to make sure she was taken care of. He sat with her through supper, where she met some lovely ladies in the dining room. They all gushed over Dean and how lucky Deanna was to have a grandson like him.
Around eight o'clock he decided to head home. He knew she would be wanting to go to bed soon.
"Alright Gram, this was fun, I'll be back tomorrow to see you," Dean said.
"You worry too much," Deanna replied with a smile.
"I care," he corrected her. He gave a kiss in the cheek and a hug goodbye.
So this is my first supernatural fic that I am posting. I've written a few and trashed them, but this is an AU and I feel slightly comfortable with it, so there you go. This is an idea I've had for awhile and I've finally gotten around to writing it. I hope you enjoy and let me know what you think.
Always
OUTOFMYMIND