I got the idea for the story after episode 1x14 The Lost Generation, so I don't follow the storyline of Lucy's mother being Rittenhouse (although I will keep that in mind and it might influence my story a little), or Emma taking over the mothership.

The Times They Are A- Changin'

1. Close Call

Wyatt closed his eyes in exhaustion as he settled more comfortable into his seat. It had been another close call for them, especially for Lucy, but miraculously they all made it out of there in one piece. Feeling immensely relieved now that they were safely back in the lifeboat, Wyatt quietly listened as the other two were getting ready for the jump back home. He heard Rufus typing something into the control panel, and Lucy fastening her seatbelt. For a moment he contemplated to fasten it for her, just like he used to do, but then decided against it. He knew she could do it just fine on her own. And so he simply kept sitting there with closed eyes embracing the sounds around him. All those sounds were so familiar to him by now that they made him relax completely. His team was safe and they were about to go home.

"Are you asleep?" he heard Lucy ask him quietly, apparently trying not to wake him in case he was. A huge grin spread across his face as he was instantly reminded of their very first meeting all those months ago.

"No ma'am," he replied accordingly and opened his eyes to look at her. She smiled happily back at him, both of them knowing exactly what the other one was thinking about in this moment.

Seeing her smile like this, after everything they had to go through the last few days, was incredible. But sadly, as soon as the memories of those days inadvertently pushed into his awareness, his own smile disappeared.

It had been awful, Lucy being held at gunpoint by Flynn so that he and Rufus would cooperate, the insane look in Flynn's eyes when he announced his plan to get rid of several Rittenhouse members all at once, the scared faces of the women when their husbands, fathers and brothers were dragged out of the room, and the defiant attitude of the men as they realised that they were about to die.

Wyatt swallowed dryly and tried to suppress those unpleasant memories again, but it simply wouldn't work this time. On the contrary, now he also could hear Lucy's voice again as she begged Flynn to find another way to handle things. But of course Flynn didn't listen …

He sighed deeply and tried to concentrate on the Lucy right in front of him instead, the one that was safe in the lifeboat with him. She was still smiling, which was a relief. He needed to see her like that right now. But then he noticed that she also looked kind of sad despite the smile. Although he wished it could be different, he didn't blame her for that. He couldn't even imagine what it had been like for her to witness the execution of these men. All he knew was what it had been like for him. Being tightly bound back to back against Rufus, he had felt so utterly useless and impotent the entire time. This incapability of doing anything for his team had been the worst. And then, when Flynn had started to kill those supposed Rittenhouse members one by one, he had only wished that he could have prevented Lucy from seeing it.

He felt quite ashamed now that he didn't really care about the people that were shot right in front of him. But all he could think about back then was that Lucy could vanish at any moment, just because her four-times great-grandfather, or something like that, might be among these people. And he honestly didn't know what he would have done if he had indeed lost her then and there …

Wyatt didn't know exactly when it had happened, but at some point during all those missions together, she had become very important to him, the reason he still kept on fighting. Without her … He didn't even want to think about it.

And suddenly it hit him. He was finally ready. Ready to move on and let Jessica go. Although he was sure that a part of him would always love her and would wonder what could have been if she hadn't been murdered, or if he had been able to bring her back, he also knew that she wouldn't have wanted him to spend his life miserable and alone. And maybe, just maybe, Lucy was the one person that he could move on with. Maybe with her he could be truly happy again, and wouldn't feel lost and guilty all the time anymore.

At the least, he decided in this very moment, he wanted to give it a try. No, he had to give it a try. What they were doing was dangerous and this last mission had made it clear to him once again that life was too short to live it with regrets. To mourn missed chances and mull over bygone possibilities.

Wyatt took a deep breath, suddenly feeling very nervous about these chances and possibilities that lay ahead of him, of them, right now, if only he was brave enough to pursue them.

Maybe he should ask her to have dinner with him tonight, Wyatt pondered. Just a casual meal between friends to see how it would feel to spend some time together without Rufus there, and without the all consuming presence of their work. Just the two of them, in a relaxed atmosphere. He didn't expect it to be romantic or anything, for that too much had happened to them during the last few days, but he really wanted to be with her right now, maybe even to comfort her if necessary, or to comfort himself, he wasn't quite sure about that yet.

xxx

Lucy couldn't believe that they were actually going back home again. A few times during this mission she had been sure they wouldn't make it. That this would be the end for them, that Flynn would kill them too like he killed those Rittenhouse members.

It had been hard to witness, but Lucy told herself that it didn't really matter when and how they died, because in her time, the present, they were all dead already anyway. But of course she knew it mattered. Not only for history's sake, but also for herself. Because every time they got into the lifeboat and went back, the past became the present for them. Those were real people they interacted with, not just some names and faces in history books, and you couldn't help getting involved. And those men back there died because of them, because they weren't able to stop Flynn.

But as horrible as it had been, she also knew it was going to be easier as soon as they were back in their present. Back in their own time everything that just happened would become kind of surreal. They could spent days in the past, but as soon as they were back in the present they would act as if nothing extraordinary had happened, as if they just came home from an uneventful day in the office. And their missions felt more like they watched a vivid movie, or had a very intense dream. And if she was really honest with herself this behaviour unsettled her more than the missions themselves did. Was she losing her compassion?

Sighing deeply, she reached for the straps of her seatbelt and began to fasten them. As she did that she couldn't help but look over to Wyatt. It wasn't like she actually needed his help, but sometimes she wished he would still fasten her seatbelt for her, like he used to do in the beginning of their time travels. It always made her feel more secure, and today she could really need that. But to Lucy's disappointment, Wyatt wasn't even watching her like he usually did when they got ready for the jump, no, he was sitting annoyingly relaxed in his seat with his eyes closed. How was he even able to do that?

At first Lucy thought about 'accidentally' kicking his shin. Of course not so hard that it would really hurt him, only hard enough that he would pay attention to her. But then she had a better idea.

"Are you asleep?" she asked him softly, grinning as she impatiently waited for his reply.

"No ma'am," he responded promptly and the way he looked at her, after he had finally opened his eyes, was better then any attempt of helping her with her seatbelt could have been. It set a thousand butterflies loose in her stomach and a warmth spread through her entire body.

For this brief moment, when they both shared the memory of their first meeting, Lucy felt the spark between them again. The spark that she had started to notice when he had kissed her in 1934. Maybe it was just her who felt it, but sometimes, like right now, she was almost sure that he could feel it too. But then, as soon as it had been there, the spark was gone again, replaced by this forlorn look that he always got when he was thinking about his wife.

Lucy swallowed hard, feeling a lump forming in her throat. What was she thinking? He would never let go of Jessica. Of course Lucy knew that Wyatt cared about her, and that he would do anything to protect her from harm, for which she was very grateful, but she also knew that he would do the same for Rufus. And he had said it quite clearly, and more than once, that Jessica was the only one for him. And she, Lucy Preston, a mere history teacher, could never compete with that. Maybe he could find his peace with someone else one day, maybe someone more exciting like Kate Drummond for example…

It hurt. More than she even wanted to admit to herself. She couldn't deny it any longer, she was in love with Wyatt Logan and all he could think of was his dead wife.

Lucy squared her shoulders and set up more straight, this had to end right here and now, if he wasn't able to let go of Jessica, she would have to let go of him.

x

"Crap!" Rufus exclaimed, effectively tearing both Lucy and Wyatt from their individual thoughts.

"What is it?" asked Lucy concerned, her eyes darted anxiously from Rufus to Wyatt and back again.

"Not sure yet, but something isn't working right."

"Don't tell me we are stranded again, Rufus," Lucy said alarmed. "Not again, not here!"

"What? Oh no, I just have to reconfigure the system," Rufus reassured her. "I think."

"You think?" Wyatt said exasperated. At times like this he really would love to strangle Rufus. Just a little bit.

"Well I … just give me a sec." Rufus pushed a few buttons and then everything went dark inside the lifeboat.

"Rufus!" Wyatt urged him forceful. This couldn't be happening, not after all they had to go through already.

"Got it!" Rufus announced a moment later, just as the lights turned back on again.

Both Lucy and Wyatt sighed in relief. "Don't scare me like this ever again, Rufus," Wyatt demanded and let his head fall back against his seat once more. He even closed his eyes again, but this time it wasn't because he felt relaxed and exhausted, but rather to compose himself after this shock.