AUTHOR'S NOTES:

This was my 2020 HP ShoreOfAngst Fest fic (hp-shoreofangst . livejournal . com) entry. The fest is over and reveals are out, so now I can post this for you here. This fanfic is finished. It is multiple chapters.

My prompt for the fest was: a Ginny coming of age tale with multiple pairing possibilities

One important aside: I apologize, but I just couldn't pull off a tragic ending given the current state of the world. I needed a win for someone, so I gave it to Blaise and Ginny here. I hope you'll forgive me, angst-lovers!

Thank you to the Fest Mod, "smirkingcat" for running this fun fest once more and for kindly offering me TWO extensions so I could better round-out the tale! I truly appreciate it!

Self-beta'd, so any mistakes are mine (sorry in advance!).

DISCLAIMER: Summary quote from "I Run To You" by Lady Antebellum, copyright Capitol Nashville/Parlophone. Harry Potter characters are the property of J.K. Rowling and Bloomsbury/Scholastic. No profit is being made, and no copyright infringement is intended.

TIMELINE: Hogwarts era-final year of the war (1997-1998)

MAIN CHARACTERS FEATURED: Ginny Weasley x Blaise Zabini

SECONDARY CHARACTERS FEATURED (by last name, in alphabetical order): Amycus Carrow, Hermione Granger, Neville Longbottom, Luna Lovegood, Draco Malfoy, Peeves, Poppy Pomfrey, Harry Potter, Dean Thomas, Charlie Weasley, Molly Weasley, Ron Weasley

SUMMARY: "This world keeps spinning faster into a new disaster, so I run." - A coming-of-age story about Ginny Weasley: what and who she values and why, who she is deep down inside...and who she loves. Will it be Dean Thomas, Harry Potter, or the least likely person in the world—her Slytherin rival, Blaise Zabini?

RATING: Hard R (MA)

TAGS/WARNINGS: Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Angst and Drama, Romantic Comedy, Tall Ginny (I'm envisioning her around 5'9"-5'10" in this fic), Blood Prejudice, Explicit Language, Implied/Referenced Underage Sex (16 is legal age of consent in Britain), head canon, Epilogue What Epilogue (EWE), Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending, Quidditch, Friendship, Non-Consensual Touching, War, Magical Vows, I did mention the point of this fest is tons of angst right?, Abuse by Death Eater teacher (sexual nature-off screen), Pranking, Reluctant Order Member!Blaise, References to BDSM fun (consensual - off screen), face smacking, Virgin!Blaise, Loss of Virginity, Oral Sex (off screen), Regrets, War violence, Disillusioned!Ginny, Pining!Blaise (reservedly, of course), Coming of Age, References to a Death Eater teacher choking a student, References to physical abuse. Please take the warnings seriously!

THE LONGEST MILE, THE TALLEST ORDER

By: RZZMG

March, 1997

"Good play, Weasley. Congratulations on the win."

Ginny stopped in her rush to reach the Hospital Wing and find out how Harry was doing to find her greatest Quidditch rival, Blaise Zabini, star Chaser for the Slytherin team two years in a row, hovering near the exit of the Gryffindor locker room. Apparently, he'd been waiting for her…and had just saluted her on taking charge and helping her divided team pull off the win against Hufflepuff earlier, despite Harry's skull fracture.

Right. That wasn't weird at all.

Especially as she and Zabini hadn't two words to say to each other all these years, either on or off the pitch, that hadn't been somewhat combative.

Well, except for that one time at Sluggie's Christmas bash…

"Chasing after a Quaffle may be more exciting, but you've got a Seeker's eye for this game," he continued, when it was apparent she wasn't sure how to reply to his praise. "Your strength is strategy. You should be Captain, not running second string to Potter."

Unsure how to take the unexpected recognition that she'd been waiting for someone to give her just once in her life—especially from him, a boy who would rather body check her into a pole at high flying speeds than talk to her—she merely thanked Zabini with a quick nod and hurried past. Harry had been injured, knocked unconscious during the game and was in a bad way, and she had to get to the Hospital Wing to see him.

-Not that trauma wasn't a common occurrence where Harry was concerned. Everything was in crisis around him, really.

"Running from me again, I see," Zabini called the challenge to her retreating back, and the taunt was like lead weights in her shoes, unable to be ignored no matter the conditions.

Ginny came to a screeching halt and turned to face him.

"Running? No, why would I?"

"That's the question now, isn't it?"

Okay, yes, if she didn't get to Harry's side in the next five minutes, it wasn't as if he would die, so why was she hurrying? Madam Pomfrey was treating him with the greatest care, so Ginny needn't worry that he wouldn't recover. Accidents happened all the time around this place, especially to him.

Yes, alright, so Ron and Hermione were with him so he wouldn't be alone when he woke up, either, so it wasn't as if he didn't have a support team on stand-by.

Alright, fine, Dean was waiting for her back at the common room, too. It would make sense to choose him over Harry, since Dean was her current boyfriend, right?

Still…

Zabini was right. Part of why she wanted to leave so quickly was to avoid a confrontation with the Slytherin. He had a bad habit of leaving her frustrated and discombobulated in the aftermath of every confrontation they'd had for years. Something about the man set her nerves on edge and her blood to boiling.

This time was no different. Already, she could feel the sweat gather at the nape of her neck as she turned for the inevitable clash they were about to have.

"Maybe it's because your lot is an untrustworthy bunch of snakes," she hissed at him. "Besides, the last time we tried this talking civilly thing, it was during Slughorn's party, remember? That didn't end so well, as I recall."

Her rival's casual repose against the outer wall of the locker room was abruptly abandoned at the reminder of Harry riding to her rescue that night, of his interrupting Zabini slithering out of the shadows to appear at her side to offer her something a wee bit stronger than pumpkin juice to drink. Standing to his full height before her now, which towered over most others their age and was more than a match for Ron's brawny frame, Ginny found his height to be a bit…intimidating, even for a woman with her Amazonian stature.

Blood. Boiling.

"Potter wasn't your date that night, and yet you allowed him to lead you around as one," he pointed out.

How dare he insinuate-!

"Harry's my f-friend," she stammered over the title, knowing it was a bit more than that on her side. But was it on Harry's? She could never be sure with him anymore. He flitted from one worry to the next, as impulsive and moody as a Crup during the mating season. One minute he seemed jealous of her and Dean, the next…like he was too preoccupied with other issues to even observe she was there. It was as if he noticed her only because she was Ron's little sister most days, conveniently placed in his path for his use, not because he actually wanted her. Talk about your mixed signals! The wishy-washy thing was even more frustrating than dealing with Zabini, honestly. "And I didn't let him lead me around anywhere!"

Zabini huffed, cynically. "Just friends? No, I think not. It's obviously a bit more than that, at least on your side." He glanced down at the red and gold painted gravel beneath his feet and gently kicked at it, his expression softening. "You'd never run from Perfect Harry Potter, would you? No, him you run to. Always."

A part of her hated admitting he wasn't wrong. That's what she was doing now, right?—running after Harry, like some starry-eyed little girl begging for even a nod of his attention when he woke up and found her standing loyally by his side.

Maybe she'd just go back to the Gryffindor common room to celebrate the team win with Dean instead. By now the party would be in full swing, and surely Ron and Hermione had things well in hand in the Hospital Wing. They'd alert the others if things took a turn. Besides, Dean was her boyfriend, technically, even if they had been doing a lot of fighting lately. It would be disrespectful to that 'relationship' to keep blowing him off in favour of a possible-maybe-very unlikely romantic rival.

But really, she wasn't going to stand here and explain her actions or justify her feelings to anyone, least of all to a member of a rival Quidditch team and House.

Zabini could take a giant leap off a tall tower, as far as she was concerned.

"Not today," she told him, and without further ado, marched away towards the castle and up into the seventh floor landing, bypassing the fourth floor and the Hospital Wing in the doing.

Two hours later, she and Dean had spent a wasteful amount of time arguing over McLaggen's dirty attempt to get revenge on Harry for benching him as a second string player on the team. She'd blown up at her boyfriend's sniggering over the Bludger Harry had taken to the head, and accused him of disloyalty to a fellow Gryffindor and teammate.

He'd accused her of still carrying a torch for her first flame.

In the end, she'd left him to run to Harry's side in the Hospital Wing.

She'd done exactly as Zabini had predicted.

~.~.~

When she was later asked by her girlfriends, she would tell them that Dean hadn't pressured her…and that would be the truth. What they'd gotten up to in a broom cupboard on the third floor on a Sunday afternoon two weeks after her Hufflepuff win had been a spur of the moment decision based mostly on curiosity on her side and more than a little encouragement on his.

As she stood and wiped her mouth with the back of her hand, Ginny could now say unequivocally that she knew all she wanted to know about being on her knees for a boy: it was gross and she was never doing it again.

Dean was slumped against the wall, panting and limp. He looked well-sated.

She felt sick her to her stomach.

A few curt words exchanged between them—she couldn't recall what had been said, exactly, as she'd been too busy trying to keep the contents of her stomach in—and then she was rushing out into the empty corridor and hurrying down to the second floor's loo. Throwing open the door, she hurried for the nearest stall and bent over, emptying her belly into the toilet. Tears poured from her eyes as she vomited her guts up.

Minutes later, shaking like a leaf in the wind, she emerged from the stall and headed for the sinks to rinse her mouth out and wash her face. It took longer to compose her nerves.

The romance novels had lied. There'd been nothing sexy about what she'd just done, and the taste... The thought made her go green and flush with the need for a second round of 'bog bowl fever'. Splashing more cold water on her face helped. So did transfiguring a hand towel into a toothbrush and rinsing her mouth, thoroughly.

An hour later, she emerged to find Zabini leaning against the opposite wall.

"Saw you run in there looking like you were going to be sick," he admitted. "From the awful sounds you made, seems I was right."

In no mood for his games, she snapped at him. "Don't you have anything better to do than stalk me?"

He shrugged. "It's Sunday. No one around this place has anything better to do than homework or to spy on their enemies today. Except maybe your friend, Granger, who uses any excuse to work out her brain."

"What is it with you Slytherins bothering Gryffindor girls? It's like you're all obsessed with us or something."

Blaise wisely kept his mouth closed, she noticed.

"Go bother a witch from your own House, will you?" she said with a shooing motion, and turned to go. "I'm sure they'd love to fawn all over your money."

"And that's precisely why I avoid them."

She snorted, not feeling the least bit sympathetic for his plight.

"I thought 'ambition towards enriching' was Slytherin's motto." She glanced at him over her shoulder. "You're telling me it's now, what, a burden to getting laid by someone of 'quality'?"

He fell into step beside her as she attempted to shake him by walking up two flights of stairs. "I'm saying it's not really sexy to know a witch wants you for the size of your inheritance…and I don't mean the one in your trousers."

"Your life is hard, Zabini…so much more than that thing between your legs, clearly."

Despite her best efforts, he doggedly pursued her up the stairs as she kept going past the fourth floor landing, then the fifth.

"How would you know?" he asked, clearly enjoying this game of chase they were on, "unless you've been staring at my crotch, Weasley?"

Damn, now she had to play for reals, because that was a gauntlet thrown, if she'd ever heard one, and not answering him would be to admit cowardice in the face of such a provocative question. "No need. Moaning Myrtle catches all the girls up on the size comparisons every year," she lied with a straight face. "Why do you think she hangs around the loos all day long? She's obsessed with cock."

She'd taken three more steps before realising he'd stopped cold on the steps below.

He stared up at her not with astonishment, as she'd expected, but amusement. "I like that you're a liar," he said around a shark-like grin that had her pushing goose pimples. "That you have a dirty mouth, too? I think I may be in love, Red."

"What will Tracey Davis think," she replied, unfazed by his fake declaration. "Just last week she was eye-fucking you like a pillow mint, if I recall correctly."

"Noticed her interest, did you? Now who's the one stalking?"

They bickered all the rest way up to her common room portrait about his tragic inability to get a girl to suck him off, and miracle of miracles, the banter did wonders for making Ginny forget all about her bad experience earlier that day. When she finally went into her tower, it was with a smile and feeling years lighter.

TO BE CONTINUED...

Author's Notes:

I adore this couple & hope I can convince you to do so as well (if you don't already!). They are a much more nuanced ship than Dramione, as I always envision Blaise to be slightly more reserved than Draco, and Ginny to be far more fiery to temper and less eloquent (more straight forward) than Hermione. It makes writing them more challenging, but infinitely just as satisfying.

Silly banter, drama, pining, angst, romance await you in this tale!

XOXO,

- RZZMG

P.S. Did I mention I live for your reviews? I do! :)