CHAPTER SIXTY-NINE
WARNING: Contains reference to abuse.
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We step up to the door of the office and push our way past the Sons all crowded around it. Getting to the front of the group proves hard till Clay reaches in with both hands and grabs our arms, the guys all move out of the way of their Pres and we end up at the front of the leather clad group, spotting Donna tucked tightly into Opie's arms a look of worry on her face doesn't help but I fix my eyes on the door.
The first thing that strikes me is the relief that there is no animal there that's lost its life to Craig simply because it existed. That relief doesn't last long when I realise what I'm looking at is a collection of photos taken in and around Charming over the past few days.
There's a series of photos of Donna, Al, Cam and I when we were in San Francisco, including one of me standing in the door of Victoria's Secret with lingerie sets handing off my fingertips, a close up shot that must have been zoomed in of that shows the expression on my face is overlapping one of Tara's car and mine crumpled together, images of me in Donna's and Gemma's cars are tucked in with photos of the lot, Washington kuttes mixing in with Redwood. The centre photos are the ones that bother me the most though, they show Gemma and I walking around Home Depot without a Son in sight.
Jax's hand lands on my shoulder and I turn to Clay the same second he turns to Kip and Happy, "Where were you?"
Gemma puts her hand on Clays arm, "Relax baby, they were right around the corner the whole time. We were never out of their eye sight."
Clay reaches out and rips the photos off the door while Bobby shuffles his way over and taps my arm. I turn my attention to him and he looks apologetic when he speaks. "That was the ones on this door. The ones on the clubroom door I removed before any of the mechanics got here."
My eyes widen, for him to have pulled them down before anyone saw them they must be bad. "Okay." I say slowly, "Where are they?"
"In the clubhouse." He leads me into the clubhouse and I can hear the footsteps of at least 3 sets of boots behind me, the sound of Gemma's heels is almost drowned out but I hear the rapid clicking that signals she's in a bad mood.
Bobby goes straight into church but comes out a second later with a pile of photos in his hand. He passes them to me and looks me in the eyes, "You may want to be alone to look at them."
I take the pile and the top photo confirms that I do want to look at them, but not alone. The image of me tied to a bed surrounded by darkness makes my heart beat skip. The top photo of the pile is from the shed where I was held captive. My eyes dart up and I meet Donna's gaze, looking past her I tuck the photos to my chest, my voice is barely there when I open my mouth, "Can we use someone's room please."
Jax's hand appears over my shoulder almost instantly, his key hanging from a finger. I grab the key but wrap my fingers round his as well. Walking away from everyone I hear Donna trailing behind, Jax has no choice but to come to. I have a death grip on his fingers, my knuckles are going white with the pressure I'm exerting and I can feel the key digging into the skin of my palm. Reaching Jax's door I let go of his hand and he unlocks it and pushes it open.
I step through it and am incredibly grateful for the smell of Jax that surrounds me in an instant. Sinking onto the floor just inside the door Jax moves to step away but my startled yelp of "Don't go" stops him in his place.
He turns back around, crouches in front of me and stares into my eyes, "Are you sure you want me here?"
All I can do is nod furiously, Donna is still standing in the door, Opie's inches behind her so I gesture both of them in as well and wait while they drop down onto the floor as well.
A few seconds pass in silence before I'm ready to look at the photos again. It's not a sizable pile, there only appears to be 5 or 6 there but I know each of them is going to rip open old wounds.
Looking back at the first photo I realise it must have been taken not long after we got there. I'm still dressed in the slacks and long sleeved shirt I'd put on for the trip. Looking at the background of the photo is more confirmation that it was the first day there, the only thing in the room is the empty bottles of whatever booze it was that Craig had given me. The first morning there was nothing else in the room when I woke up, the water bottles had appeared after a day when Craig realised I'd die without it.
Passing the first photo to Jax I look at the second one. This must have been taken a few days later, one of my shirt sleeves was gone and my uninked arm was completely bare. There was a towel over that arm that was dirty and stained. The background of the photo lets me know that it was only a few days later, the 'business' bucket hadn't arrived yet.
The third photo is a close up of me from the shoulders up, sound asleep, my face is screwed up in pain and my forehead is dotted with dried sweat that shows up white and flaky in the image. My hair is a huge knotted mess hanging off the edge of the bed; it's obvious from the view that by that stage my upper body had been stripped. I don't even want to know when it was taken so I pass it to Jax, barely noticing the tremor in my hand till Jax grabs hold of it and squeezes tightly.
The next photo in the pile has been taken from slightly further away, my upper body is in the shot but I can't tear my eyes away from my arm. By the time he'd taken this one the scabs were starting to fall away leaving puckered scar tissue behind.
The way my face is and the position of my body lets me know that this and the previous photo were taken the same day, probably only minutes apart.
I'm only holding 2 photos left and somehow I know they're going to be the worst of the pile. Glancing down at the next one I squeeze my eyes tightly closed before opening them again, but the image hasn't changed. I don't know when it was taken but in it I can see every rib sticking out of my skin, the shadows under my eyes are almost black and my face looks gaunt, the angle of the photo is the worst thing about it, he'd obviously been standing at the end of the bed, the photo shows the rope pulling my feet apart, my spread legs, my vagina has made the dead centre of the photo but in the top of it I can see the rest of my body. I absently pass the photo to Jax and his in drawn breath is all I hear before a flick of his lighter and the photo is going up in smoke. Grabbing it off him I smack out the flames before they can take hold.
"Jax, I may need that for evidence." I say, the words sticking in my dry throat.
Jax shakes his head, "Where that bastard is going you won't need any evidence, just a shovel."
I shrug and pick up the photo again, Donna and Opie have obviously seen the contents cause a wicked grin crossed Opie's face with Jax's mentioning of a shovel, Donna grabs my hand while Jax lights the photo again and we watch it burn.
The last photo is still sitting on my lap, when I dropped it to save the last one it ended up landing upside down. Picking it up and glancing at it I lurch to my feet and run straight for the bathroom, everything I've eaten that morning coming up in a bitter rush.
Donna appears by my side seconds later and starts running her hand down my back. "The photo..." I manage to croak out. "Did Jax and Ope see it?"
"Yeah S, they did." She sounds apologetic when she confirms it.
My head hits my arms and a fresh wave of bile flows from my mouth. "Oh god, please kill me."
"Not gonna happen; however that walking piece of fertiliser has a time bomb over his head that he doesn't even know is ticking." Opie's voice is furious, his hands a shaking and clenched tightly in fists.
A massive crash from Jax's room startles me and Opie shakes his head. "Jax didn't take that well."
Another crash sounds and Opie leans backwards before looking over, "Gonna need a glazier."
Several more smashing sounds echo before footsteps come running in the door, Happy, Tig and Clay are all standing there looking around, "What the fuck? Did you just break all your windows bro?" Tig splutters.
"Yeah, you got a problem with that?" Jax sounds pissed off and ready to pick a fight with anyone.
"Opie, go deal please." I mumble out from my position.
Opie vanishes into Jax's room and then all I hear is a series of scuffling steps. Opie comes back in a second later, "You may wanna come out Sarah. Jax just decked Tig; they're heading to the ring."