Author's Note: Hello lads and ladies

I once had a conversation with Paula about how I, she and the manga portrays characters. It was mostly about how my characterization was way more human than the way that Paru paints her characters as animals with civilized thought, while my characters are human thoughts with animal instincts. What I mean by that is that in the manga, the original order is that animal instincts are stronger than civilized thought, and in my story thought comes first, instinct after.

What all this is about is specifically a specific wooled individual known as Pina. Dall-sheep are polygamous, having different partners that they cycle through from time to time. Now my human thought interpretation of this is… what if Pina is a nymphomaniac that doesn't cope well with being alone? I tried in past chapters to write Pina as a self aware character that just kind of knows that the writer of the story is different now, because I honestly think he has the significance to do that. And in this chapter I'll try my best to build on that strong foundation

If I nailed his character is something I very strongly doubt, Paru had different ideals for him and that is obvious. But I still think I did a good job of making him fit into my work. All of you enjoy reading and have a wonderful day/night afterwards.

Editor: Some Random Reader32
Enjoy!
-Portal

Chapter 20: The promiscuous wool

"I never understood how people make such a big deal about this. An instinct and instinct. You can answer it without being so deeply involved like they pretend one must be." Tokugawa laid in bed with his back leaning against the headboard revealing his toned chest and a cigar in between his index and middle finger. Cosmo was lying on her stomach, looking up at the Cougar as they talked in the morning hours, still partially hidden by the covers.

"I mean it is your job after all. As if it can be a job I think it's safe to say that one can indulge in sexual relations without being emotionally bound to each other… Not to say that an existing friendship can't help the intimacy, but just because people sleep with each other doesn't mean they have to be together. Sometimes it is nothing more than two individuals answering Nature's call without emotional dependency." He took a draw and looked out the window, the rain clinging to the windows. Cosmo snuggled closer to him, a hand brushing through his chest.

"I think that you worry too much about other people's business, and really why should you care?"

He grasped her hand and looked at her.

"Because you're dear to me. In my life I learned that emotion is the furthest thing from civilization. In a business like yours, your life is always on the line and It hurts me to know just how easy it is that one of your clients burns up in his passion and…" He trailed off in his head but said nothing more. He was worried but she didn't want to hear anything about it. She was an adult who made the choice herself.

"Inside of each of us lives a beast. The bridge to it is much shorter for a carnivore than for a herbivore. We only need a spark and then it's all over…" She giggled at the sentence. Tokugawa smiled without any humor. He wasn't joking but he knew that she wouldn't accept it. She belonged among Carnivores, that was what she always said, even on the first time they met.

"Since when are you so poetic?" She grinned at him and he smiled back. He led her hand to his mouth and placed a kiss on the back of her hand. She felt his fangs through his lips which sent a tingle down her spine.

"I'm easily flustered around pretty ladies…" They shared eye contact for a while before he led her hand back to her and threw the blanket off him. He walked towards the window and glanced outside. The murky weather was making the entire day a lot darker than it usually was. His eyes landed on the water fountain in the garden encased by the walls of the mansion.

She laughed from behind him.

"Are we moodily staring out of the window now?" He smiled while still turning towards the window. His reflection looked forced and almost uneasy. And if he was honest to himself he hated the idea of letting her go after breakfast. The night before proved again how dangerous things had gotten. A world filled with bureaucrats and repressed savages were the wise words that his Father had repeated to him as often as he could. They were words so wise he told them to Miguel when he was old enough to understand the significance behind it even when he swore to himself in his arrogant Teenagerhood to never use those words when he was in that position. But adulthood crept up on you. You look into the mirror one day and the cock-sure teenage rebel is gone, leaving behind only the faint residue of adolescence that bled through the layers on the new found adult that one had become. And even that residue didn't stay for very long.

Tokugawa turned around and smiled at the okapi lady still under the covers.

"I'm sorry my dear, I was just stuck in thought. What would you say for Breakfast?" He placed his hand on the wall and leaned against it, the light grey light from outside just being strong enough to slightly illuminate him. Cosmo realized that any normal herbivore would never in their life feel safe so close and vulnerable to a carnivore. That was how things were for her. Fear was never her style anyway. She smiled.

"That sounds good." She clasped the cover and knocked it over, leaving the bed in nothing but her fur. She walked up to him and looked him in the eyes, catching hers completely with a hypnotic hold.

"Shower?" she pointed at the door leading to the bathroom. He nodded, both never losing each other's gaze. As the look gained intensity Toku chuckled with charisma thick enough you could cut it right in the air. He grabbed her waist delicately and nodded towards the door.

"You first pretty lady." She smiled, the only emotion one could express in that gaze that you could just drown in. With that they stepped into the bathroom.

Cosmo walked out of the bathroom and glanced at Toku following behind her, she came to another realization about him. He never lingered long on her form once they left bed. Cosmo knew that rarely any client of hers wasn't glued to her. The only ones who didn't stare were socially awkward. And even those warmed up quickly to her, she'd always been charming. Toku never looked at her long when she was as vulnerable as now.

"What are you thinking about?" Cosmo asked, slipping into her undergarments. The cougar looked further into space as he pulled up his trousers and pulled his belt tight.

"Nothing in particular. Mostly about how thankful I am for yesterday. Seeing you is always a gift." He answered. Cosmo put her shirt on as the new thought invaded her head. Toku was always thinking about something, yet never seemed entirely lost in his head. He was seemingly unburdened by instinct and completely engrossed in the present moment. It gave a flutter of wary whenever she thought specifically about the cougar. The only carnivore she ever met that never showed any sign of instinct. It was peculiar and yet seemed to fit his character in a way that she rarely saw any person fit their character.

The breakfast progressed in near complete silence as Tokugawa dissected and ate his food with persistent care that seemed to be utterly stuck in thought. When she spoke up he still reacted with perfect attention, still close to reality by all means. But the silences in between were filled with a negative noise. Such a quiet that the thoughts laying behind it stuck through like wisps of fog in the morning air.

Cosmo put her utensils down and looked at the Cougar on the other side of the table with a longing and inquiring gaze. Toku simply looked back with the same gaze that hid the emotion inside incredibly well. He even smiled. It was so close to completely hidden that Cosmo was close to believing that she had simply interpreted something falsely into his behavior. But his eyes held movement behind them, like cogs in a clock moving endlessly and tirelessly as they continued to precisely measure time.

"What are you thinking about?"

Toku laid down his utensils and drank from his glass, a fruit cocktail minus the alcohol for the morning. He put his hand to his chin and smiled.

"Sweetheart, I worry too much, I always have as far as I can remember…" The pause was peaceful and easy while still pumping the pressure that she felt in the conversation.

"I am thinking that I want to invite you to dinner next week. Just to have more time to catch up. I haven't talked to you in quite some time and I do miss us just talking." It's your goddamn job putting me on edge sweetheart. I worry too much about you getting hurt for me to sit still. She heard it loud and clear. Reading between the lines was only easy with Toku when he wanted it to be.

Cosmo had to fight the urge to show her dismay of his worry again. They were always worried. Worried friends, family and even strangers when they find out just what an Okapi just walked into their store. The truly worst part about it was that she could have lived with ridicule. But not with Pity.

Her father had always used to say how careful they had to be. He was a man who lost his wife to a carnivore attack. A truly random act of violence based on nothing but blood lust instinct. Cosmo thought that the person that truly did deserve pity was her father, but not a strong adult woman like her.

He had spent his entire life trying to keep her and her sister safe, being the prime example of a helicopter parent, making her youth sheltered. But with so many things in life, you could never expect and control everything. And so things changed when Cosmo became of age.

They surrounded her like flies surrounding a piece of rotten fruit. Her female features came earlier and stronger than others… and that attracted hormonal teenagers in droves as they swarmed her. Okapis, Deers, Goats, It didn't matter which species, males were drawn to her like opposing magnets. But God works in mysterious ways, and an upside is always haunted by it's shadow equivalent. So it came that her first crush wasn't the popular sheep with obvious interest but the held back maned-wolf at the back of the class.

And Although her first stint with love ended in a horrid embarrassment of the maned-wolf rejecting her advances, the seed had been planted. It was new, it was exciting. There was no jealousy of her features or pity for her being a herbivore… there was only… desire. She loved every second of it.

And that was how she left home two months before her 18th birthday, running away into the hands of the world father had tried to protect her from.

The first position as a call girl was made on pure luck as Cosmo had to realize shortly after how vulnerable she was at the time. She would have gone for any good-willed offer blinded by naivety, ignoring the knowledge that almost any pimp with a bit of intellect and a lack of moral code would have seen a winning lottery ticket in her. Young, attractive, impressionable and extremely eager. She could have just as well could have gotten a tattoo on her forehead stating 'Exploitable'

The person she ran into didn't have some vaguely European name and an accent indicating them to be of Russian origin. The Boss she met was a small Pine marten by the name of Kaleido. He was a young fellow with a rather sizable chunk of heritage from a dead uncle who died a millionaire. And coming from a family of business owners with varying degrees of success as well as Kaleido himself having worked as a bookie for a casino a few towns over before hand made him quite savvy in the handling of funds. And smelling riches he set out for the city which held the biggest Black market of the country, Edobutsu.

With about half of his heritage still in his bank account, he was ready to make an investment. A small strip club in the heart of the meat market that only needed minor renovations. And so he promised her a full position, high but still not enough pay for a job as a herbivore stripper, but she didn't know at the time. In the time of the renovations themselves Kaleido played part as her manager and connection to the clients. And so she met the only mammal that never showed her any pity until now.

It seemed to Cosmo that pity was a quality only learned by age. The young didn't feel any pity towards others because they honestly didn't care. In age, when you learned to care anyway… then that awful fear set in. If they don't take care of themselves, I'll lose a friend. Apparently the first reaction to the worry of speaking up for the first time was that one pitied the person for being in a weak position of exploitation.

"Cosmo… don't start thinking that all I'll be talking about is your future. It's not my business and you wished that I shouldn't make it my business. So I ask you as a friend, would you like to stay for dinner next week?"

Cosmo felt the urge to break off his attempt at deescalating. But what would that bring her? His opinion wasn't going to change and hers least of all. She was all stubborn and that was another quality that Toku was impressed by. Instead she just smiled and nodded. A weak surrender, but no loss by any chance.

"Why should I say no? But I can't stay overnight. Pinkie would be quite upset." Toku laughed it off in his trademark charming way.

"Of course he would be… how does Friday sound to you?"

"Friday sounds lovely." They looked at each other for a while longer, the clockwork in Toku's eyes returning at it's usual intervals.

They concluded their breakfast while Toku still was only half present, the other side of him delving deeply into his mind as he opened the door of the car for her. Suddenly he returned to the present as he grasped her hand and looked deeply into her eyes. The clockwork was gone, leaving only the brown colored eyes that invited one to sink into.

"Watch yourself sweetheart. Also please call me. If not for my worry than just out of friendship. My work is putting me on edge a little and… just call and talk to me." The lines in between were gone, this was his genuine thought and feeling.

Her response was a smile.

"I'll call you. Thank you for having me here in the first place."

"I wouldn't have it any other way. Goodnight Cosmo."

They waved and the okapi lady sat down in the car which drove away.

Tokugawa watched her with an ugly feeling in his stomach. The ice cold reach of fear had beset him and the feeling was growing through him each day. In the Adult world fear was often masked by other emotions in order to cope and react to the feeling better. You were worried, anxious or outright aggressive against whatever scared you. He had learned that adulthood held nothing but the ability to lie to yourself and tell yourself everything is ok. That's your duty as the head of the house. You have to be the rock for the children of the new generation to hold onto in the tides of life. Your own feelings didn't matter anymore.

Growing up held only qualities of loss that, because of your age, you were accepting of. You grow old enough to no longer care because of the responsibility placed on you by your peers and elders. You were either normal or a broken cog that needed to be repaired or outright replaced.

He returned back into his mansion with an immediate route for his office. Past the Lobby at the front of the house he entered his study. His desk stood at the opposite end of the room, his large armchair ominously throwing a large shadow over his table and far into the room. To his left and right large bookcases stretched over the walls. He entered the room and strolled behind his desk, pressing a button in the top drawer. The bookcases sunk into the floor, revealing the large photo and portrait walls that Tokugawa kept hidden ever since his fathers death.

If no one gave a shit about his feelings, then no one deserved to know them. Every memory of the family cycle he was part of was close to his heart. Both positively and negatively.

His father's portrait filled a considerable part of the wall. He sat in his throne like chair behind his desk that he sat in for most of his time acting as the Boss of the Black market through the years. His black suit had thin white stripes over it. Of all things to say about his father, him knowing fashion was definitely one of them.

Toku found that thankfulness only reached so far. You could only be so thankful for things that people did that you disliked. Kuragari never laid a finger on him or had him beat up or anything physically done to him. He hadn't been the most present father anyway. But he had loosened the tight grip on the market even further than his grandfather had already done. The detrimental thing about it was that it was his policies that allowed the mafias to lash out as they have.

With a sigh the cougar glanced over the various smaller photos that were more like small nuances of memory instead of the heavy and dense entity his father had taken in. Various events scattered among the timeline of his life in the grand eye of time, observing and keeping all of them in their natural order. When you glanced at the pictures, for a small moment you were gone from the face of time, locked into an emotion you associated with an era of your life.

For Tokugawa, a few of the most important pictures were nestled together, by his personal arrangement, no one touched the wall but him. A picture of him beside Miguel, a snapshot of him at an acceptance ceremony attended by the most important members of the cycle his father was a part of and lastly a picture of him beside a certain okapi lady in a rather luxurious establishment in comparison to their casual meeting places.

Before he was allowed to truly dwell on the pictures in front of him, the phone rang. Tokugawa walked with a firm step towards his armchair and sank into it. With the press of a button the wall hid itself again from the open world. He picked up the phone and leaned into his chair.

"State your business."

"Ehm, Boss?…" Gouhin's voice sounded out, sending the first few questionable signals into his mind.

"Doctor Gouhin? What's going on?" The cougar's question was met with a sigh of surrender and frustration.

"My police contact informed me of something that sounds… like mafia work."

The Cougar leaned back into his chair.

"Well yes. The mafia's are finally cleaning up after themselves, of course there are some casualties, well deserved by the way. You can't rid yourself from cancer without cutting yourself open first…"

"All I wanted to ask was what exactly happened. If I can get back to my contact-"

"Listen Gouhin." Tokugawa interjected. "You don't want to get overzealous here. All that was done is that a few savages got nullified. I could have just as well killed them, they should be thankful."

"Boss, please." Gouhin never begged or pleaded in his tone of voice. This was the closest that Tokugawa ever heard Gouhin ask for anything.

"I want to know what happened. That's all I ask for."

A Grimace unseen by Gouhin lit up on the cougar's face.

"And what would you do with that information? Play Hero and save the day? You can tell Strightman that it happened for a reason if that clears his conscience…" He regulated his breathing elevated by anger.

"I may trust you Doctor, but don't stretch my patience. I have enough garbage to sort out because of all this god damn stress. If a few savages are seen as a threat, so be it. I keep my turf safe, they keep theirs safe… If Strightman inquires about this matter just say that my territory is my territory- or better yet, the next time he asks about this you bring him to me and we'll have a talk about it. He can get all his facts straight by me."

Tokugawa hung up and looked across his table. It's always them ruining it. Always them coming along and putting words into people's mouths or twisting context or plainly making stuff up!… One would need to send them a message so they finally listen.

Tokugawa picked up the phone with lethal intent and punched in numbers. Minutes later he left the office on his way to his meeting with the Beastar.

There really isn't much if anything better than being surrounded by females in Pina's mind. No matter the species, no matter the name, their smell was all the same. The prickly sweet smell of spice that he yearned for in every waking moment. They all wanted, needed him. He was in heaven on earth when he got their attention for himself, all for him. He was a top competitor in the great game of getting laid and he planned on keeping it that way.

The question of the wolf had sparked a question in his mind though. Why was he like this?

Pina didn't spend much time in the past, he was a now-man that concentrated solely on the present moment, quick on his feet and full of impulse. What use would thinking of the past bring? He would sit around and waste the sweet time he could spend making out with another girl that wanted to talk to him. But as Pina bounced from bedroom to bedroom just like any other day he found the idea of thinking about the past more and more intriguing as the day went on it's natural path of the journey of the sun.

Why was he like this? Was it just his first time, bringing him to realize his true calling, his true passion in life, or… what happened?

The warehouse talk had put a thought into Pina's head that for the first time in his life made him question if he was in fact a weirdo all along. He knew practically no one from his age as 'promiscuous' as himself. And here he was, swapping spit with Stephanie, Angela or whatever her god damn name was. He broke contact and leaned his nose against her, sniffing in her scent. I just want to forget. Forget all about it and just go on… why isn't the scent doing anything.

"Anything wrong?" Her first thought was that she did something off putting. He couldn't muster his full smile, but she didn't notice. Close to nobody noticed if he smiled fully or not.

"Nothing about you." His hand brushed over her cheek. She melted into it almost instantaneously.

"I was just thinking about the Drama club… If I were to perform there soon, would you go to it?" Her dreamy gaze into his eyes did nothing to distract him from the issue in his mind.

"Of course I would." Her voice was sweet, he still didn't care. That goddamn wolf…

"Now kiss me Theresa." He leaned in only to be met with a hand shoved in between them and a chuckle from her. It was angry and out of character.

"You know what, I changed my mind." Her foot pressed down on his as she stood up, the dall-sheep pressing himself against the bench as he felt the painful pressure.

"Someone who sleeps around so often he can't even remember a girl's name he's flirting with… animals like that should just die." The slap caused his cheek to burn. She stomped off and the new light Pina thought that feeling shame was favorable to constantly questioning oneself. He looked at the ground and stood up, the pain in his foot now being a light buzz that could easily be ignored.

He strolled to the bathroom not in any way different than normal. His emotions were his business and no one deserved to know them. He never had enough trust in anyone and in all honesty to himself, who else? He was fine with it as it was.

The bathroom was mercifully quiet. Days of rejection had come before, he told himself that when you got around a large quantity you were bound to hit some rejection every once in a while.

The mirror reflected a person that was alien to the thought process of his personality. Just a shape his thoughts inhabited in the daylight, nothing greater or lesser. He never fully understood the concept of attraction. He was pulled towards females in a tide that flooded more than it ebbed. He never understood how people had preferences for looks that had nothing to do with the skills in the bedroom. Shape or form didn't matter if the game they played alone behind closed doors felt oh so heavenly.

But just because he didn't understand it didn't mean he didn't play by the rules. His wool was conditioned, combed and on his head he used hair gel from time to time to keep the locks sitting right. He used a plethora of perfumes, all of them for specific occasions. And his horns shone in a golden sheen caused by the honey he glazed them with.

More often than not after rejections he would move on immediately, but right now? The thoughts had come again, twice as strong as before and he asked himself if he was the weirdo, and in the case why he was the weirdo. What made him different and where did his need for contact come from? He was bound to his feelings like all others. He couldn't choose if he wanted to be special or normal in that regard, nobody knew these days. You wanted to be exceptional and special, but that would make you normal like everyone else. And being truly special meant that people would make fun of you for being weird as they put it. So you never won anyway.

One of the bathroom cabinets opened and Pina turned to address whoever unknowingly caught him on the first journey of self finding in his life. The large bear leaned his head from left to right, his neck cracking loudly. He emitted a satisfied sigh and turned only to spot the dall-sheep watching him.

"Oh… Pina." Riz uttered.

"Hello." He waved lazily and straightened his back, sounding out more cracks through the room. It always reminded Pina of the sound of breaking twigs, hearing bones crack. He locked onto the bear and looked upward at him, flicking his head so his locks fell into place.

"Don't you know that this place is a herbivore toilet?" Hands on his hips he leaned forward and looked at the bear with eyes of tease he used everywhere. It got him the attention he strived for, absolute full attention.

Riz stared back with the minimum amount of what barely counts as a smile. Pina wanted to be annoyed but couldn't really muster anything coming up as such. All he felt was gladness to be back in the moment instead of stuck in the confines of his mind questioning what he was. The present was so much more fun than fantasy. At least to him. Maybe he was a weirdo in that department too.

"Oh well, bye-" He strutted forward towards the door. The brown furred hand gripped the white tiled wall with enough force to leave a dent. His fingers curved, breaking the wall further as Pina observed it.

Fear was a thing that could either be a blessing or curse, Pina didn't know. All he did know is that In the moments where Riz showed awfully suspicious behavior that in all cases but one put him at an extreme danger circled in a corner, he felt nothing. His collar felt a bit warm and he loosened it. His hands were still cold from him washing them minutes earlier and his feet were slitting over the slightly wet floor. He felt like any other day. Maybe his instincts at least knew, but he felt guilty. He was supposed to be afraid right now, supposed to be in fight or most likely flight. He was none of those things. And he couldn't say if it was a blessing or a gift.

Wasn't there at least something in life he held onto? Wasn't there some friendship he treasured too much to be completely ok with being eaten?

He apathetically looked over at the bear. At least one of us is having fun. Pina thought to himself. Riz was smiling with an open mouth, spit dripping through his teeth out of his maw. Pina stared at him with a blank view that seemed on par with a mannequin's ability to express emotion.

"So what now?" Pina asked. The bear remained standing completely still, senselessly staring down the cut of meat in its path. Pina looked back and hardly controlled the urge to laugh. If I knew getting devoured would be this boring I would have brought a book.

Riz didn't register the half laugh escaping Pina as he himself was locked into a trance, losing himself in the dall-sheep. The grip on the wall let go as the Bear walked closer. With a straight back Riz towered by a good three heads above Pina. His height was accompanied by a not insubstantial amount of body mass.

Pina didn't really back away which caused a stab of hurt much deeper than before. Was his own life so worthless that he didn't mean to protect it in the slightest manner? Was he going to sit here and let things happen with no push back? Did he care so little for himself, that this… Game he played really was a flick of a coin moment that didn't hold any meaning beyond the moment in itself? What did it mean to remember things if you didn't treasure the experience? You recalled an event in a completely neutral stance with no thought behind it beyond the reaction of 'yeah, that happened'.

Before Pina could execute an action in the much grander game of life, the door opened and Riz walked towards the sink in complete neutral stasis of emotion. Nothing entered, nothing left. His black button eyes held no life in them as Pina came to realize. They moved based on instinct, not on thought. They held no civilized quality.

"Your horns smell nice, honey glaze I think?… it r-really fits you." The stutter was fake, but the other bathroom visitor, a rather large moose, didn't take notice of the comment.

"This is a herbivore only bathroom, carnie ones are down the hall."

"Oh sorry, my mistake." Pina had to give it to Riz, he played the unsuspecting Teddy bear perfectly well. His mannerisms were clumsy and uncoordinated. Despite his hulking frame he upheld the illusion of complete harmlessness.

Riz walked past Pina and shot him a glare of unforgiving focus that signaled Pina a disturbing fact. He was now the object of focus. First Tem and now him. Geez that guy really has a goddamn wool fetish.

Pina laughed while the moose passed him by, shooting him a weird and wary glance as he slipped into a stall himself.

Pina turned around and threw a gaze into the mirror. Fear of life and death here nor there… He looked like he did any other day. But his non-existent instinct of self-preservation made place for the power to think critically. And he knew what to do. He had to tell a certain wolf who would know what to do, as empathetic as he was.