The Burning Phoenix

01

The war was over.

For days on end no one knew if he was dead. The battle scene was turned upside down in search for any sight of remains; many were sceptical about them finding anything if his death had been less than pleasant, say by burning as the entire building had fallen to the ground. There were very few survivors; only Death Eaters. They appeared to have been driven into insanity at what they saw, mumbling things under their breath, something about a burning Phoenix and "him".

Yet all through the twisted and burnt metal of remains, none resembled that of Harry James Potter.

His close friends were sceptical of the announcement in the newspaper that declared both him and Lord Voldemort dead. "Poppy cock", her brother had announced; everyone thought he was grieving, but Ginny had reason to believe him. It didn't feel as if he was dead, when ever someone died Ginny got a twist in her stomach before she had even known it had happened. Women's intuition maybe. All she knew was she couldn't make herself believe he was never coming back.
She hadn't mourned, hadn't shed a tear. Her mother had, Ginny had caught her over the kitchen sink the very next morning and had hugged her, still with her mother quivering in her arms unable to be moved. She'd been numb to a lot of things. She'd almost sliced her finger off and for a long time she had just looked at it as it spread and became a hot red. And for days on end she couldn't sleep, she lay awake watching the ceiling, waiting to see the light through her window and hear her mother make breakfast.

'She hasn't been sleeping,' Hermione was saying to Molly early one morning as Ginny made her way downstairs, tying up her robe.

Her feet were purposely quiet so she heard more.

'I know she loved him, so did I, but like Ron she's having trouble accepting the fact he's… well damn it, I am too. I suppose I always imagined he'd pull through, can't stand thinking about the fact that we've lost him. But we have. And there's no going back.'

'Good Morning.' Ginny said quietly taking a seat at the breakfast table.

'Good morning.' Her mother replied glancing at Hermione who'd busied herself at the sink. 'How are you feeling this morning?'

'Tired,' Ginny said a matter-of-factly.

Her mother didn't seem to know what to do about this.

'Well perhaps we could find a sleeping drought for you sweetheart. You need your rest.'

Ginny nodded and played with her breakfast only sipping her juice. She didn't eat much even though her mother's cooking was fabulous as usual. Arthur joined them soon, as did Ron and he and Hermione sat close talking to one another. It had been one of the most badly timed relationships in history by both of them – telling this to Harry and the rest of the world a month before his death.

Ginny knew Harry had never got over it.

Her breakfast eventually went cold and she chucked it and rinsed her plate. She took her orange juice and a book outside and was only there for a few minutes when Ron sat beside her.

'Gin. You OK? You're looking really pale.'

Ginny sipped her juice.

'Didn't sleep,' she said quietly.

Ron shook his head. 'You've got to stop doing this to yourself, Ginny.'

Ginny closed her eyes.

'I'm not doing it to myself; myself is doing it to me.'

To her it made perfect sense but Ron was looking confused.

'I can't help it. It's like I want to sleep and I want to eat but I can't, as hard as I try I can't seem to …and you think I'm nuts.'

She sighed and he took her hand.

'I don't think your nuts I think you just need to try a little harder.' He kissed her hand and hugged her. 'You can do it. You're strong, Ginny Weasley.'

He turned and Ginny saw Hermione at the door.

'Were going to Diagon alley, you want anything?' Ron asked.

Ginny shook and turned her head and heard them pop away. She wished she could just pop herself away to nowhere but she couldn't apparate yet so she settled for a long walk out in the fields behind the Burrow. She sat for what seemed like hours, wrapped in a light shawl in the warm summer weather. She watched the sun fade behind the clouds and sat until it had gone and she could hear her mother calling her. She'd missed lunch and her dinner was probably going cold. She waited a few minutes before getting up and going inside, halfway there Hermione was on her way out to get her.

Ginny thought she'd ought to say something but she couldn't think of anything and Hermione seemed to sense her hesitation.

'I just want you to feel better,' she said calmly and Ginny nodded.

Hermione held out her arms and Ginny sunk into her embrace and for some reason or another she begun to cry and her dinner had gone cold before she stopped.