There once was a giant flower named Cagney Carnation, who ruled over the greenest, liveliest garden in Inkwell Isle. As beautiful as it was, however, denizens were often wary about visiting it. This was because Cagney had a strict set of rules for anyone entering his garden, and was very unforgiving to those who broke them. The most important rule was that you never bothered the plants, and would never touch them without their permission. (How you were supposed to get permission from a plant was anyone's guess.) Those who broke those rules - even by accident - were sent home with allergic rhinitis.

So one could imagine how incensed he was when the neighboring Candy Kingdom, led by Baroness Von Bon Bon, started encroaching on his territory. It seemed to him that the Baroness would go out of her way just to tick him off. She would throw loud, raucous parties at night when he and his sprouts were trying to sleep, and set off frosting cannons that would leave his garden splattered with thick, viscous icing. Every time that happened, Cagney would yell at her and shake his leaves, while the Baroness just stuck out her tongue and pulled down her eyelid.

To make matters worse, the two of them each claimed ownership over the strip of land separating the garden from the kingdom. Every time a flower or weed sprouted there, the Baroness or one of her subjects would pull it out, leading to another vicious argument.

Then came one fateful day, when the Devil just happened to be passing by Cagney's domain, after stopping by Baroness's. His ears perked up as he overheard the overgrown flower grumbling to himself.

"Damn these roots," he griped. "If only I could pull myself from the ground, I'd march over and give that sugar-loving floozy a piece of my mind."

The Devil grinned, spying another opportunity. "That can be arranged," he said as he took slow steps into the garden.

"Hey, watch where you step!" snapped Cagney. "Keep your hellfire away from my petunias!"

The Devil chuckled. "Relax, relax. I won't harm you or your beautiful crops. I'm just here to make you an offer."

Cagney folded his leaf-arms and raised an eyebrow at him. "I'm listenin'."

"What if I were to tell you that I could give you the power to uproot yourself and walk the earth freely?"

The flower eyed him skeptically. "And live?"

"Of course."

"Okay, good. Just makin' sure it wasn't one of those dealies where, you know, I pull myself out of the ground and then I start dyin', and you're all like, 'Well, you didn't say that you wanted to uproot yourself without dyin'!' Like that stuff with the Monkey's Paw. You heard of the Monkey's Paw, right? I mean, of course you have. You're the freakin' Devil, you probably invented it. In fact, my cousin Lily once said that-"

"Yes, yes, I get the point," said the Devil, waving him off. "But everything comes with a price, you see. In exchange for this gift, I will need you to sign over your soul."

Cagney laughed. "What, that's it? I don't even know if flowers have souls. You can go diggin' around in my pistil if you want, but I doubt you'll find anything. You got yourself a deal."

The Devil smiled to himself as he summoned his pitchfork and began to cast his spell. What a fool, he thought. Every living thing has a soul.

A beam of light was launched from his pitchfork and struck Cagney in the face. As soon as the light dimmed, he could feel his roots start to loosen. He pulled himself upward, and with a pop, he dislodged himself from the soil. He was elated to see that his roots had morphed into two makeshift "feet".

"Hell yeah!" he cheered, jumping in the air and clicking his feet. "Thanks for that, Dev'. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go show that smug little tart what for."

With that, he stomped over towards the kingdom, floral fury in his eyes. He only got so close, however, before he heard a sizzling sound on the ground beneath him. He looked down to see that his new feet were starting to shrivel and decay.

"What in the-?!" he cried, hopping back. As soon as he stepped away, his foot repaired itself. But every time he tried to step forward, it would start to decay again. The Devil had neglected to inform Cagney of the wish he had granted Baroness Von Bon Bon just moments ago.

"What's all this, then?!" he yelled. "Devil, you dirty rotten cheat! You wanna explain to me what's goin' on here?!"

Alas, he wouldn't get a straight answer, and instead found himself surrounded by mocking laughter - from the Devil on one side, and from the Baroness on the other.