It is exactly 7:00 am when Emma Swan's alarm blares in her ears the next morning. She rolls over and reaches out a hand to turn it off as her eyes flutter open and she stretches, before letting out a groan.
Today is the day! She is going to break up with Killian and after that; she is going to come out to her parents. She feels a little nervous about the latter, but these are literally people who rely on magic to dictate who they're destined to be with so they can't possibly have a problem with her being in love with a woman. Can they? No! She doesn't think so, but she supposes they could have a problem with whom that person was.
Would she want her kid coming and telling her that they had fallen in love with someone who had tried to murder her multiple times, ripped her away from her newborn baby and her husband by casting a curse that caused them to be amnesic and frozen in time, and for her daughter to end up in land without magic with only a six-year-old boy to get her to safety.
Or a person who put her husband in a coma while ensuring he was also married to someone that definitely was not her. Then framed her for murder of said husband's fake wife and eventually tried to poison the aforementioned newborn when she came to save them twenty eight years later?
Well, it definitely wouldn't be ideal. But she knows that they would be supportive, especially if that person was reformed like Regina is and at this point, she's completely ignoring that the woman was her Mom's Stepmother, because it was years ago, she didn't want to be married to him and well; it was also in another realm so it falls under the postcode rule. Right? Also, he's dead.
To be fair though, she could have totally fallen for someone worse, like Rumple or... Well, just Rumple really. Every other villain is dead apart from Zelena, but she was actually pretty tame compared to Regina and Rumple. Zelena only ever killed one person and that person was technically already dead, so does it really count? Anyway, back to her point. The Ex-Evil Queen isn't the worst person she could have fallen for and her parents will just have to get over it.
She eventually rolls out of bed an hour later and drags herself into the kitchen. She needs sustenance for the day she has planned and food always makes her feel better.
She's just finishing up making pancakes when she hears her phone blasting out Toybox-Best Friend from the other room. She instantly abandons her pancakes and scrambles to answer it before the person rings off, but in true Emma Swan style, that doesn't exactly go to plan and she ends up tripping on her discarded pants from the night before and falling face-first into her bedside table. This resulted in her having a bloody nose and two possible black eyes. The phone rings off while she's still on the floor crying in pain and then she smells burning.
Oh, this is just fucking brilliant. Not only has she bust up her face because of her own stupidity, but her kitchen is now on fire and she has also missed Regina's call. She sighs as she picks herself up and makes her way back to the kitchen to put out the fire. Luckily it was just the frying pan that was burning and she actually remembered she had magic this time, so she puts it out with a wave of her hand.
You know, perhaps she really was an idiot. I mean, the last few days had kind of proved it, hadn't they? Zeus was probably sat on mount Olympus looking down on her and laughing his head off at how much of a clown she was. But there really wasn't time to dwell on that now.
No! She needed to clean up her face and have a shower, then go and get breakfast from the diner as apparently, she is incapable of cooking. She then had to text Killian so that they could stage their break up and then she had to meet up with her parents and tell them she was in love with their ex-nemesis and there was absolutely nothing they could do about it. Sounds exciting, right? Right?
She made her way to the bathroom and took a look in the mirror. What she saw had her groaning in frustration. She had two purple eyes as a result of her very broken nose, not to mention her split lip. How exactly was she supposed to win over Regina when she looked like she had just gone ten rounds with Rocky Balboa? The woman would probably laugh in her face, and Emma wouldn't blame her.
She let out a hiss of pain as she attempted to clean up the blood. It really fucking hurt and she wanted to cry, but she didn't because she was the fucking Saviour and she laughed in the face of pain. She did actually try to laugh but it hurt too much, so she stopped almost immediately. Right, okay. Maybe laughing was a step too far. Even so, she was the Saviour and she wouldn't let a broken nose, two black eyes and a split lip ruin her plans. She had a beautiful sexy, but slightly terrifying Queen to woo, and the fact she looked like the elephant man would not stop her.
Once she had fixed her face as best she could and took a quick shower, she got dressed in her favourite black skinny jeans and that blue shirt that she borrowed from Regina and didn't give back, a pair of boots and her red leather jacket. She grabbed her phone and keys and headed to the diner.
She got to the diner exactly seven minutes later. She kept her head down as to not attract attention to her newly disfigured face as she walked through the door and made a beeline for her favourite stool. Once she sat down, she put the menu up in front of her face. The last thing she needed was Ruby taking the piss out of her.
Ruby slid up to take her order not long after she sat down.
'Hey Ems. Do you want your usual?' She asks cheerily.
'Yeah, sure! And has Hook been in this morning?' Inquires Emma from behind her menu.
'Erm, nope. I haven't seen him since last night. He was with Robin and they were drinking rum by the docks. I saw them when I went on my run. I didn't speak to them though... But Em-' Ruby explained, before she was interrupted by the bell above door signalling another customer had entered.
Both women looked towards the door to see who it was. Emma's menu was all but forgotten when she took in the sight of Regina, looking like she was about to blow the place up. The vein on her forehead was pulsing angrily and her eyes were blazing with fire.
Emma swallows hard as the Mayor takes five dangerous steps towards her. She goes to open her mouth to, well, she doesn't exactly know what she was going to say, perhaps plead her innocence before she gets incinerated. She doesn't get the chance anyway because Regina is already speaking.
'Miss Swan! Do you have a good reason for ignoring me?' She growls, and it's all low and seductive. Emma shivers in response because, damn! Regina's angry voice is sexy.
The whole diner was silent and waiting for a response. Emma sits up straighter and squares her shoulder before she replies.
'Regina! This is the first time you've spoken to me in a whole week. I don't think you have the grounds to be placing the blame on to me,' she points out.
'You ignored my phone call this morning and you've ignored two since then. So yes, I have every right to place the blame on you,' spat the Mayor.
'I was busy! I do have a life, you know. My world doesn't revolve around you!' Snaps Emma. She was fed up with taking the blame for everything and this week had been a nightmare for her. Regina had avoided her at all costs but as soon as she misses a few phone calls, it's suddenly the crime of the century. She was also feeling tired, anxious and hungry; but she knew as soon as the retort left her mouth that she most definitely should not have said those words.
She winces as she watches hurt flash in Regina's cocoa eyes before a dangerous smile plants itself on her plump red lips.
Fuck's sake! She had probably just ruined her own life.
'Is that right? Hmm? Well, guess what, Sheriff? I'm officially now busy for the rest of your existence. Which, if you keep eating the way you do, won't be very long. I want the paperwork that was due three days ago on my desk by five. You can send David with it!' And with that, the Queen spins around and struts out of the diner.
Emma is still cursing herself for her stupidity twenty minutes later when Killian staggers in and throws an arm over her shoulder.
'How is my favourite lass doing?' He slurs.
Emma scrunches her face up in disgust at the stench of rum on his breath. 'I could be better. Also, we're breaking up,' she declares.
'Yeah, that's probably for the best since I possibly cheated on you last night. I can't be sure though.' He smirks.
'Right!' She draws out the word before continuing. 'Well, we had a good run but it's over so... Yeah, that's all, really.' She shrugs as she finishes up her pancakes and drinks the last of her hot chocolate.
'Ok, cool. drinks later at the Rabbit Hole? And what happened to your face, did someone punch you?' Inquires Hook, completely unbothered by their break up since it wasn't real.
'Yeah, sure! No, I tripped over. I have to go, so I'll see you later,' she replies as she heads for the door.
She hears him shout 'Bye lass' as it shuts behind her and she smiles. She knows she said everything loud enough for Leroy, who was sat beside her to hear everything and she's planning on him using his town crier skills to spread it around. Hopefully, it will get back to Regina and maybe just maybe the Mayor will feel sorry for her and forgive her. But that is a big maybe because the Queen really did seem more furious than she normally does when Emma does something to piss her off and she briefly wonders why that could be before she remembers she needs to go see her parents.
She takes a deep breath and flicks her wrist, transporting herself right into the middle of the loft. Her parents don't even bat an eyelid from where they're sat at the breakfast table eating porridge that looks a lot like baby sick and she thanks Jesus that she ate before she came here.
She takes a seat across from them and smiles. Well, it's actually probably more of a grimace considering the state of her face and the pain she is in. Her mother is unsurprisingly the first to react.
'Oh dear God. Emma, what happened?' She rushes over as she jumps out of her seat to fuss over her injured daughter.
Emma bats her away with her hands. 'Mom! I'm fine!' She decides to cut straight to the chase. 'Killi and I broke up.'
'Did he do this to you?' Gasps Snow in horror, at the same time David stands up and grabs his sword while yelling, 'I will fucking kill him.'
'Do what?' Emma looks confused for about half a minute until it clicks. 'Oh, that? No! I tripped over. He isn't violent towards women anymore, remember? Not after that one time he shot Belle and then she gave him that five hour lecture on why revenge wasn't the answer and why he should never hit a woman. They became quite good friends after and he occasionally helps her in the library.'
'Hmm. Yes, I remember. She's his sponsor now. So why then?' She asks curiously.
Emma fidgets a bit before she looks Snow and David right in the eyes and speaks calmly. 'Because I love someone else.'
'Okay... And?' Prompts Snow with a look that Emma can't quite figure out.
Emma takes a deep breath. 'It's Regina. I love Regina,' she rushes out before she closes her eyes in preparation for the shriek that she was sure was about to come. She's surprised when she hears her mother's extremely unbothered voice again and she opens them back up slowly.
'I know, Honey. You're friends and it's okay to love your friends. I love Red and she's my friend,' reassures Snow with a smile.
'Huh? No! I love her more than a friend,' she tries to explain.
'Oh! You mean like best friends?'
'No! I mean like I want to live with her,' she declares confidently.
'Ah. So you mean like roommates? I guess that would save a lot of money, but I can see why Killian wouldn't be happy with that. Can't you all just live together?'
'What? No! I mean like I want to share her bedroom with her. You know, me and her in a room together by ourselves... Having fun?'
'Oh, you're getting bunk beds? With a slide too? How fun! I wish I had bunk beds.. And a ball pool. Definitely make sure you get a ball pool, you'll have loads of fun then,' replies Snow gleefully.
Emma sighs. This is a lot harder than she thought it would be. 'No, Mom! That's not what I-' she starts, before she gives up and tries a different route. 'I want her to be my partner.'
'Oh, sweetie. I don't think your dad will be too happy about that and I'm more than sure that Regina will not retire from being Mayor to become your Deputy Sherriff,' replies her mother gently.
'Yeah! What's wrong with me? Am I not good enough for you anymore?' Huffs David.
'Oh for fuck's sake, no! I. am. gay,' she yells in frustration.
'Really? Me too, honey. Although you don't sound very gay right now. You shouldn't yell you know, gay people do not yell unless it's in joy and you don't seem very joyful,' scolds Snow.
But Emma is still hung up on her mom's first few words. 'EXCUSE ME? What did you just say? You're gay? You? Pure as Snow fucking White is gay?' She thinks she hears a muffled snort but ignores it and continues to look disbelievingly at her mother.
Snow gives her a disapproving look before she answers calmly. 'Language, Emma. And yes, why is it so unbelievable that I'm happy? I have a wonderful husband who is also my true love, two beautiful kids, a fantastic grandson and some really amazing friends. I am definitely gay.'
'You know what? Nope! I'm not fucking doing this. I'm out, goodbye,' spat Emma before she stormed out of the loft, slamming the door behind her.
David turns to his wife and smirks. 'Honey! Don't you think that was a bit mean?'
'No, I don't, David. It was hilarious and you know it. Plus, she obviously thinks we're idiots. Ha! As if she thought we actually bought her and Hook together. They didn't even hold hands, not one time and she screams homosexual. Plus she's been in love with Regina for forever, she really doesn't hide it very well. I can't believe she thought she could trick us. She deserved it!' Declares Snow smugly.
'Yeah, you're right! It was hilarious. I actually thought I was going to crack up at one point, and she does deserve it for thinking we're dumb. I bet Regina and Zelena would be really impressed with you right now,' he replies with a proud grin.
'OMG! Do you really think so?' She asks excitedly.
David assures his wife that he certainly does think so before he gets ready for his shift at the station. He can't imagine he'll see his daughter any time soon, but he finds that he feels not one ounce of guilt. He and Snow will come clean just as soon as their daughter has learnt her lesson of not trying to bullshit her parents.
Emma had gotten as far as outside of the loft because she remembered she had magic and poofed herself into her house. She needs a drink which seems to be the theme of the past week and a bit.
She groans as she throws herself on the sofa after pouring herself a generous finger of Jim Bean. So today was an absolute disaster! Not only did she ruin her face, but she also managed to completely piss off the woman of her dreams before then proceeding to fuck up while coming out to her parents. Well, at least she broke up with Killian successfully and there's always tomorrow, isn't there? Yes! Tomorrow will go to plan because she will make sure of it.