Despite the trip's "success", seemingly, Rin struggled to maintain an air of elegance and stoicism during the return trip to Emiya's estate. The taxi drive was as quiet as the trip to Mount Enzou, but once the three women were inside the safety of Shirou's home, Rin contemplated returning to her own manor for the privacy it would guarantee. She needed time to process everything following the end of the fifth Holy Grail War. There was so much to digest and work through. She felt as though she had too many scenarios on hold for the sake of her own sanity.

'It's quite late.' Sakura mentioned shortly after the front door had been slid shut by Rider. It's as though she knew exactly what her sister was thinking. Considering they had spent so many years as inseparable siblings, perhaps that wasn't so far from the truth. 'You can…stay another night, if you'd like.'

It's not as though traveling in the dark concerned Rin whatsoever. If any thug or lowlife was foolish enough to attempt anything with Rin, they would find out the hard way that she wasn't an ordinary girl by any stretch of the imagination. Still, she was emotionally exhausted, and honestly didn't trust herself to be alone just yet without Arturia. The fact she had stumbled mentally so pathetically within Mount Enzou was only further proof of this. Sakura and Rider, mercifully, hadn't mentioned her obviously swollen eyes following Rin's little breakdown upon understanding that Arturia was gone for good at least.

'Sure.' Rin submitted and was relieved all over again when Sakura smiled subtly.

'I'll get you some pajamas. Help yourself to anything in the kitchen.' And off Rin's little sister went, still clutching the crimson jewel close to her chest with both hands.

'I cannot thank you enough, Rin.' Rider took off her hat and sunglasses, placing them upon the divider between the kitchen and dining room. Rin crossed her arms, moving within the space more comfortably now that she knew she was staying. The light overhead had been turned on, which illuminated the immediate area perfectly, bringing a warmth to the atmosphere Rin didn't hate. As long as Shirou could make it back, she could rest easy knowing Sakura had a little family here in this lovely place.

'I owe her more than I can give, but this is a decent start, I guess.' Rin shrugged.

'You are a good sister.'

'I'm not…' Rin hissed, shaking her head in annoyance. 'I wasn't. But I can start now. Better late than never, right?'

Surprisingly, Rider placed a hand on Rin's shoulder, giving her a light squeeze.

'You are suffering, yet you place Sakura before your own grievance. You have my respect, Rin. Should you need anything, ask.'

Rider released Rin, moving to the kitchen and appearing to heat up some water. It was still amazing how she could work so perfectly with her eyes closed…or was she? Rin chanced a closer look, and realized Rider was actually looking at what she was doing, likely aware that she wasn't making direct eye contact with anyone. She was mesmerizing in her own way, her curvaceous form somehow even more alluring when completely concealed by jeans and a sweater. Between Rider and Sakura, Shirou was sort of insanely lucky, wasn't he? Assuming he came back, Rin supposed.

'Tea?' Rider softly asked.

'…If you don't mind.' Rin decided. Anything was welcome if it even had the slightest chance of calming her down.

Rin brought her tea to her room once she wished both Sakura and Rider a goodnight. She wasn't completely repelled by the idea of spending more time with her sister, but she worried her compromised mental state might get in the way of adequately representing herself before Sakura. Thankfully, Sakura had been more than receptive to the idea of turning in early, and promised Rin a nice breakfast come the morning.

Truth be told, Rin was somewhat looking forward to a nice meal together with Sakura and Rider. That was a good sign, right? There was definitely hope for Sakura and her, it appeared. If they both worked at their relationship together, maybe…just maybe Rin wouldn't be completely alone anymore.

Rin changed into the pajamas Sakura had left in the room for her and was endeared by the cute t-shirt and shorts that had been selected. Sakura was obviously beginning to understand Rin's preferred styles…at least when she was outside her home. She wasn't sure how she'd feel if her little sister knew about her kitty-printed set of nightwear. That was a side of her she'd rather only Arturia be aware of.

Once the light was turned off, Rin took some quiet moments to herself, sitting within the futon upon the floor and sipping her tea within timely intervals of thought.

Consciously, Rin kept Arturia in the back of her mind as much as possible, for she knew allowing her thoughts to circulate around the woman and her loss would only lead to further heartache. Therefore, the Tohsaka girl began with Kirei Kotomine. In retrospect, it was hard to convince herself that the shady priest really was dead, but the state Rin found his corpse in left little wiggle room in relation to his ultimate fate. Truly, Rin suspected Sakura's corrupted state had caught the man by surprise. It was the only reasonable explanation, and one Rin was willing to settle the scenario with for the time being. She knew more thought would have to be given to the passing of her mentor and technical guardian when the matter of inheritance came into play, but considering she was the official winner of the fifth Holy Grail War, Rin suspected she might have a little more leverage when it came to how her family's fortune was to be handled.

Time would tell, she supposed.

After another warm sip of her tea, Rin sighed upon swallowing, her subject of mental interest now returning to Shirou and his potential revival. Honestly, she was feeling confident so long as Rin was able to make contact with the right individual to help with the transfer of Shirou's soul…assuming it really was placed within her crimson necklace. Considering what Illya had said, and what Rin knew about the Third Magic, things were looking quite good for her little sister. Come the morning, Rin would return to her manor and dig through her father's documents referring to his multitude of colleagues. One was bound to have enough knowledge to help.

Successfully bringing Shirou back would certainly help Rin feel less like a failure within the war despite her supposed "victory", anyway.

Finally, Rin was about to think about Sakura when a light knock at her door made the Tohsaka girl jump slightly, the thought of spilling what remained of her tea causing Rin's heart to speed up nervously.

'Come in.' Rin kept her voice low, the night already fairly mature considering the time the three girls had returned from their excursion to Mount Enzou. Whether it was Sakura or Rider, Rin didn't care. Both were welcome at this point. Anything to prevent her from inevitably narrowing her psychological state down to the one person she dared not consider too heavily lest she lose the remnants of composure she managed currently.

The door slid open tentatively, Sakura's head poking in with a subtle look of bashfulness about it.

'Sorry to bother you, Rin.' She apologized, which somewhat irked her older sister.

'It's fine. Come in. I wasn't even close to falling asleep.'

Sakura did so, her white nightgown beautiful upon her shapely body as she crawled into a sitting position just along the outside of Rin's futon. For a moment, she said nothing, seemingly unsure of how to conduct herself before turning to slide the door shut, if to simply keep her hands busy for a few more seconds.

'…Me, too.' Sakura finally said almost comically late. 'I-I tried to go to sleep, and I thought I would right away because I know I'm exhausted, but…'

'The Tohsaka curse.' Rin grinned slyly. 'We overthink things. Blame our father for that.'

'Maybe…' Sakura grimaced subtly, and Rin knew she had attempted to integrate her sister into that line of thinking a little too soon. She should have known. Tokiomi Tohsaka, as far as Sakura knew it, had willingly given her up to the wolves. Still considering such a man a father would be difficult.

'Sorry.' Rin apologized quickly, but Sakura simply smiled lightly, if with obvious pain.

'It's fine. He did what he thought he needed to do. In the end, I did become a mage.'

The rhetoric was painfully clear to Rin. Yes, Sakura became a mage, but at what cost? The Crest Worms forced her into a horrific predicament. The thought made Rin sick to her stomach. Thank goodness Shirou rescued her from such a life. He really managed to become some kind of hero…

'Speaking of which,' Rin decided to ask for her own peace of mind and to determine whether or not Illya had been able to fulfill part of her wish. 'Your…urges. I imagine after such an ordeal they would normally be erratically demanding, but you seem stable enough. Do you mind telling me your current state?'

'I feel like I'm visiting a doctor.' Sakura giggled.

'I-I just want to determine a few things.' Rin blushed.

'It's fine. I…don't really want to hide what I am from you anyway, Rin. It's…embarrassing, but we need to be…more honest with one another, right? As much as I hated being influenced by the Shadow, and as much as I regret what I've done, I…liked how uninhibited I was. I liked being able to finally tell you how I felt.'

'True.' Apparently, Rin and Sakura were having the second half of their heart to heart from earlier. That was fine. Rin hadn't anticipated getting much quality rest to begin with. If she could help heal Sakura's mind after such an incredible ordeal, all the better.

'Before the war, I was usually able to keep my body's needs under control by myself. I always felt sick to my stomach afterward, but at least I was able to…control myself. Some days were worse than others. Some days were…terrible.' Sakura paused, biting at her lip nervously and not looking at Rin. What she wanted to say next was difficult, but Rin had a feeling the thought of finally exposing her truth was a form of liberation she had learned to appreciate no matter how painful it might be. 'W-when Shinji found out about my condition…' She started shakily, pausing again to gather herself, voice trembling still. 'He took advantage of it.'

Rin's eyes widened in horror. For some reason, she might have convinced herself that the night Sakura killed Shinji was the first time he had ever attempted such a thing. How naïve. Sakura's been suffering from the Crest Worms since she was handed over to Zouken Matou. When was the first time Shinji realized he could get away with such a heinous crime? The implications of Sakura's words seared Rin's heart with white hot pain. Of course. For Sakura to get to the point of murdering Shinji…he must have had his way with her on far too many occasions.

That piece of shit…!

'Sakura…' Rin began, for once at a complete loss of words. Nothing seemed even remotely worthy to respond with. Fortunately (or perhaps unfortunately), Sakura went on, tears lining her eyes as she sobbed alongside a wry, twisted smile.

'A-and sometimes…part of me…even liked it.'

'No.' Rin placed her tea down and went to her sister, taking her shoulders and understanding precisely the false truth she had been burdening herself with until now.

'Yes.' Sakura giggled in between whimpers. 'T-that's why a piece of me…can accept Senpai's death. Because if he does come back…this ache in my heart will only change to the shame I felt every single night Senpai was kind enough to pretend I wasn't a filthy and used shell of a woman…'

'Damn it, Sakura!' Rin brought her sister into a full embrace, holding her so tight she heard the girl gasp for air before she loosened her hold slightly. 'You're not…filthy, or used, or…! You're my sister! You are a Tohsaka!'

Sakura pushed Rin away lightly, meeting her moistened eyes with her own.

'Being a Tohsaka…honestly doesn't mean anything to me anymore. No. It just hurts more thinking about it.'

Rin blinked rapidly, her mind processing what Sakura was saying. Thankfully, her sister took Rin's hands, bringing them up between the two girls' faces.

'But being your sister? I-I want that. I…I want us to be close again.'

'Oh…' Rin breathed out in relief. 'Me, too.'

Sakura gave Rin's hands one last squeeze and then let her go, glancing to the side of the room as she went on.

'So, yes. It's not like that anymore. My body. It…doesn't need as much as before. By now, I would have wanted some kind of relief. I would have done it myself or Rider might have helped. But I don't even feel the urge. Not much, anyway. It's…really nice. I almost feel normal.'

'Good. That's good.' Rin nodded along.

'Does that mean…you really made a wish? Were you given the chance, Rin?' Sakura's eyes were wide and focused, watching Rin's reaction as closely as she could. 'Did you…try to cure me? Did you keep your promise?'

Sakura had every right to doubt Rin's word. Who wouldn't after years of neglect? Thankfully, despite the temptation that bid to deter her commitment to helping Sakura, Rin had made the right decision, seemingly, when given the opportunity to ask something of the Grail.

'I had to start somewhere, Sakura. Of course, I wouldn't let you down again. There was no other option.'

Sakura smiled, but it wasn't as bright as one expected, a fatigue dragging her expression down.

'Thank-you…' She mumbled almost sadly. 'But…what about Saber? Didn't you want to save her, too?'

'Of course, I…' Rin's eyes tingled, her voice caught in her throat. The deluge of emotion caught her off guard, although she really shouldn't have been surprised by how mercilessly thoughts of Arturia dropped any emotional defenses she tried to harness. 'But I made a promise to you. I…I couldn't pretend you weren't suffering. I knew for sure now. There were no excuses anymore.'

Sakura nodded slowly, but what she asked next truly tested Rin's ability to withhold more tears.

'But you loved her, didn't you?'

Rin steadied her breathing, her turn to look to the side of the room that was suddenly so very interesting when either sister struggled with facing the other.

'More than I thought possible…'

Sakura exhaled sharply, a hand reaching to her own chest and gripping the material that covered it tightly until the folds crinkled all around.

'So…he was right.'

'Who?' Rin sniffed, thankful she had regained some control of her demeanor.

'Kirei. He…told me if I…if I wanted to hurt you…to…'

Rin's eyes stretched wide in realization. She thought it was strange of Sakura to create such a spectacle of Arturia's execution. She had mostly suspected the Shadow of corrupting Sakura's thoughts to such an extent, but even that didn't seem right. But…Kirei…?

'Why would he…?' Rin muttered aloud.

Sakura hesitated, one eye squinting as though it was painful to recall.

'He was evil.' She said meekly. 'So evil…it's why I…I-I…!'

Predicting another bout of tormented disdain for her actions as Dark Sakura, Rin took hold of Sakura's shoulders, bringing her forehead close to her sister's. It was a bit risky, but Rin really needed Sakura to remain calm. This notion that Kirei had wished to cause her insurmountable agony was perplexing, if somehow not completely unexpected for some reason, but Sakura's mental state came first.

'Sakura. Calm down. It's over. I'm here. If it's too difficult to talk about, then we can move on.'

'N-no. I…You deserve to know.'

Rin considered the situation, glancing behind herself at the futon. Another somewhat risky proposition, but perhaps exactly what Sakura needed to calm down.

'Did you…want to lie with me? Have a sleepover…or something? Might make it easier to talk?' Rin felt her cheeks flushing, never really engaging with such "girly" activity even with those she might consider friends. However, all hesitation left Rin's consideration when Sakura nodded, her doe eyes shimmering with anticipation.

'Like we used to…' She whispered melancholically.

'Yeah.' Rin agreed. 'Exactly.'

Childhood memories filtered through Rin as she shifted amongst the futon's sheets and allowed Sakura in. She pictured a much smaller version of her sister, giggling away as she nuzzled in close to her older sister on "special occasions". Their father hadn't been the biggest supporter of such events, perhaps anticipating the day he would give Sakura away, but their mother softened him to the notion enough to allow it here and there.

Once Rin pulled the covers over herself and Sakura, she understood that they had no choice but to be close enough to touch with the tiniest of movements.

'A little more crowded than I thought it'd be.' Rin noted apologetically.

'I…don't mind.' Sakura giggled quietly. 'Yeah. I feel better already. This is like…before everything went crazy.'

Before everything went crazy. That was summarizing both Sakura and Rin's lives rather simply but accurately. Rin smiled mildly, taking Sakura's hands into her own beneath the covers and not minding the closeness of her situation suddenly. She didn't like thinking about a life without Arturia, but in this moment of understanding, the Tohsaka heir could at least somewhat envision it now. Sakura was still here. Sakura was in a world she belonged. It wouldn't have been right to pull Arturia into Rin's present. She had other matters to attend to if all went well for her.

'I killed him. Kirei.' Sakura spoke so low Rin almost didn't hear her. She breathed out slowly, nervously meeting Rin's eyes. 'I didn't trust him. He wanted to…see others suffer. I thought I was corrupted…a-and I was, but that man…there was something wrong with him. Even when I killed him…he almost seemed…happy. When the Shadow ate his black heart…he sighed in relief.'

When the Shadow ate his heart. Understandably, Sakura distanced herself from the scenario. That was fine. Rin was more interested in this side of Kirei she wasn't completely aware of. Sure, she didn't trust him entirely, but the man had raised Rin following her parents' death, to a degree. He hadn't overtly messed with her life, as far as she knew. Yet, instinctively, Rin thought otherwise. He always had this air of disconnect and betrayal about him. It's why Rin could never relax around the priest. It's why she wasn't utterly dumbfounded by what Sakura revealed to her about him. Perhaps part of Rin had suspected as much all along. Her gut couldn't put all her faith in Kirei Kotomine, regardless of if she was forced to consult him on occasion. Even in this moment, with his death final and his mask removed at last, Rin felt as though she was still missing something – something so horrible about the man that she knew, for her own already fragile mental state, that it was best left unknown for the time being.

Rin gave Sakura's hands a light squeeze, rubbing the top of them with her thumbs affectionately. It almost felt like they were making up for years of lost time the sisters fell into one another's company so willingly now that the seemingly insurmountable barrier between them had been torn down with just a bit of honesty.

'Obviously he was messed up.' Rin summarized considerately, aware it wasn't a subject to linger on for the sake of her poor sister. 'The Shadow is to be blamed, Sakura. You would never do such a thing normally. I don't think any less of you.'

'B-but Saber…'

Rin's throat tightened, but again, for Sakura, she did everything she could to maintain the elegance she prided herself on so much.

'You were mad at me. You had every right to be. You wanted to make me feel even a sliver of the pain you've experienced for the better part of your life. Again, I don't fault you for it. Not entirely. After everything I've put you through, I'd say we're just about even now, okay? Does that help?'

Sakura shook her head stubbornly, the guilt respectable but tiresome.

'You didn't go out of your way to hurt me though…'

'I lied to myself to believe you weren't in pain. It's just as bad. And I did it for longer than a moment.'

'B-but…'

Rin gripped her sister's hands, her voice shaking despite herself.

'I used family rules and regulations to neglect the last person I cared about in this world – rules I, if either of us, could have usurped should I have truly wished to. I told myself you were being taken care of by an actual family; more than I could say about my own life. Even when the evidence compiled against me, it took infiltrating the Matou manor to stare the truth in the face before I finally understood the nightmare you somehow lived through. If anything, Sakura, you went easy on me. I'm the older sister. I'm the one who should have done everything in my power to save you. Not Emiya-kun. Not Rider. Me. You're my sister. We're…we're the only ones left. I was a fool. A coward. A hypocrite. And yes, it tore my heart out to see Arturia suffer so, but I know that was only a fraction of the agony you endured all by yourself for years.'

Rin took a breath, wondering why Sakura was crying. However, her little sister was soon lifting a hand to Rin's own face, wiping tears from her cheeks. When had she started as well? This was…an emotional day, to put it lightly.

'Rin.' Sakura simply said, her bravery and empathy blinding. 'It's okay. I forgive you. I do. You've said all I ever wanted to hear and more. You've shown me how sorry you are. You even used the Grail for me. How could I still be bitter?'

'There's no way it's that simple…' Rin scoffed with a wry grin.

'You're right.' Sakura laughed, her eyes full of tears. 'Maybe a part of me will always feel a little resentment, but more of me wants this again. More of me wants you in my life again now that you're being completely honest about everything. You were…put in a tough spot, too. What we had to go through at our age…it wasn't fair. There's no way we could've been ready for it.' Sakura bit at her lower lip, eyes searching before finding Rin's anew. 'I love you, Sister. And…that's why it was all so hard. I've always looked up to you and wanted to be like you. But when you wouldn't even look at me…'

Rin nodded, accepting the guilt readily.

'I love you, too. I do. And that's also why…it took me so long to admit that I had failed you.'

Sakura smiled brightly now, her expression less hindered by apprehension.

'I know that wasn't easy for you. Trust me.'

There was a break in the conversation, Rin and Sakura's hands intertwined and their faces close. Rin was thankful she had fought so hard for this. She had no idea how much she missed having her sister until this moment with her. Again, the notion that she might not be completely alone anymore made thoughts of life without Arturia a little more bearable. But just a little.

'Did you…want to talk about her?' Sakura offered kindly, if a little tiredly. It was as though the adrenaline that had allowed both girls to remain so alert until now was finally subsiding, the biggest steps toward true reconciliation taken already.

'Honestly?' Rin felt her throat tighten again. 'Maybe not just yet. It's still…not the simplest subject matter for me.'

'Hm.' Sakura tried to hide her disappointment.

'But we'll definitely talk about her eventually. Promise. I think I'll go crazy if I don't…'

This clearly encouraged Sakura, the younger sister's eyes already beginning to droop. The relief she felt from the day's events must have drained her all at once, for she began to crash hard very quickly.

'Good.' Sakura almost slurred. 'Should we…talk about anything else?'

Rin snickered, releasing Sakura's hands and poking her on the nose.

'Maybe. But I think we can wait until tomorrow. We should both get some rest if I'm going to figure out a way to get that troublesome Emiya-kun back in a body of some kind.'

This seemed to perk Sakura up.

'T-that's possible, right?'

'I'm not going to lie, Sakura. My knowledge on soul displacement isn't the best. I don't want to give you false hope. All I know is it's not impossible. I'm sure my father has contacts for me to reach out to. Don't worry. I'll do everything in my power to get Emiya-kun back.'

Sakura nodded, her mouth twisting into a tight line. Rin touched the side of her face then, stroking her cheek and then combing her hair tenderly.

'Let's just get some sleep for now, okay? That's all we can do until tomorrow.'

'I guess so…' Sakura moved into Rin's touch, nestling her head upon her chest. The quiet that came between the sisters thereafter was a new form of silence they both could relish. At last, the static pain that perpetually kept them apart for all these years had begun to dissipate, and considering Rin's own heartache, it couldn't have been better timing.

Rin continued to caress Sakura's head long after the younger girl was breathing heavily, able to give in to the rest she so evidently needed. Rin, on the other hand, struggled to calm her mind. While she certainly valued the fact she and Sakura were on a path of healing, she knew the damage to her heart was permanent due to Arturia's absence from her life. In the quiet of the night, Rin was left to her own torturous thoughts; a blonde haired, green-eyed spectre of a king refusing to release her until hours later when exhaustion finally overcame her utterly and completely.