A/N: So it's been a while.

I once again apologize for the delay.

I finally got done with my report and got my diploma for it so yay I guess.

It'd be nice if I didn't have that damn seasonal cold.

Now all I gotta do is find a job.

In any case, I still need a Beta Reader so to whoever is interested, don't hesitate to come knocking!

Also, I got a Pat-reon and Ko-Fi now (names on my profile), so there's that, I'd greatly appreciate any support.

Plus, after this chapter, anything I intend to post will appear on Pat-reon a few days earlier, and you can even participate in polls to choose which previews/characters I should expand upon! That and more to come!

These last two chapters didn't have much in terms of actions or story progression. This one kinda does and doesn't at the same time, I'll let you, my beautiful peeps, decide.

So please read, review, and hopefully enjoy.

Without further Ado!

P.S: Chapter 13 got some minor edits at the end.

"Oi...Dobe"

"Eh? Whadaya want, Bastard?"

"... What's this I hear about you leaving?"

"..."

"...Well are you going to say something?"

"Heh… what do you want me to say?"

"Something like the reason you're being a moron. You got their respect. Your dream is almost in hand… So why throw it away now?"

"Ah… I never said I was throwing it away, it's just… This war made me realize… I still think like a kid sometimes… I've never really seen the world and just understood how it all works"

"..."

"Maybe in a few years… I can come back and claim the hat. I told Kakashi-sensei to warm me the seat by then"

"..."

"Besides...I'm still young, ya know? No way am I gonna spend my youth in a cramped little office signing papers! Bahahaha!"

"Heh… only you Naruto…"

"Heh…"

"I heard about Hinata…"

"Yeah… don't get me wrong, she's a nice gal, I just don't feel ready to settle down yet. Maybe after I come back"

"..."

"Don't say it. I already told her to move on. I don't want her holding out hope like that…"

"Haaaah… and you call me a Bastard"

"Shut up, Sasuke"

~~A Conversation between Soul Brothers~~

A large male clothing store, near Washington State Park, New York, 27th of September, 2000

Amidst the hustle and bustle of the Big Apple, an unusual commotion coming from a small corner shop attracted the attention of passersby. None of them stopped for long, having been used to strange sites in the city and thus, putting it aside in favor of their more pressing priorities.

Chad, a young part-timer manning the store, however, wished nothing more than to be in these busy people's shoes.

At least then, he wouldn't have to witness and later on clean up (lest his boss gets on his case), the veritable chaos occurring in his establishment. The other workers had quickly taken their own customers aside and left the young man with the current problem to deal with alone. A short blond boy, a tall man who shared a similar shade of hair had entered the shop, greeting him pleasantly (in the man's case) before simply bulldozing their way through his stock.

Chad had seen things in his time here. He'd witnessed the depths of human depravity on Black Friday last year, had to play riot police against angry housewives whenever the manager decided to have a limited-time sale, started praying again when mothers started bringing their toddlers and forced them into dresses. He even stopped a shoplifter before.

Basically, Chad believed he'd handled all this business could throw at him.

He never expected it to be literal however as he was dogpiled with about half of the store's inventory. The troublesome duo had initially dragged him with them asking all sorts of questions on high-class male clothing, questions that he answered to the best to his ability.

Both his charges had been in the store for a couple of hours now, going through shirts, ties, and pants at a faster pace than most teenagers the young man had seen. He'd have long since kicked them out had it not been for his boss's insistence on treating the customer like royalty, and the fact the blond man had assured him they'd compensate him for the damage.

From what little he could gather from the conversation, the two big clients (or at least he hoped they'd be big) had an appointment or a reservation with some hotshot. They were clearly tourists as the rest of the conversation had been in a foreign language, something related to Chinese or some other Asian language if the man had to guess.

The rest was lost to him as a pair of designer mocassin shoes impacted his forehead with great force and put him out for the count. Several more articles of clothing were thrown atop the now unconscious man as the pair of clients continued arguing with no regard to their surroundings.

"Hmph!" the boy struggled as his father forced him into a moss green cardigan to fit over his yellow dress shirt.

"Ah, ah, ah~ Stay still Boyo!" Naruto, clad in a simple orange shirt and cargo shorts, fretted over his son as he forced his head through the fabric.

"Pops! Come on, this is stupid! We got tons of outfits back home!" the younger Uzumaki complained. He had taken the disguise he used initially when they first came to the US, that of a young child.

"I know, but it's all too old-fashioned and not Western. Heck, my most modern fancy suit is from the Meishu period, and all you got is a few Yukatas to hide your Tatas. Now stay still." the whiskered man grinned cheekily.

"But-" Zetsu protested again.

"I need your butt in these pants boy!" The father interrupted him, his large grin never leaving his face, even as his son visibly groaned at him, but complied with his father's request.

"You got us invited to a dinner with probably one of the most influential people in this pantheon so we gotta look our best and I wanna show off my handsome boy!" The Sage continued, as he adjusted the cuffs.

After Zetsu's telepathic discussion with Hestia and Rhea, they had agreed to meet at the titaness' own residence for dinner and introduction. The duo had thus decided to usher the group to New York, where both had then sneakily left the young demigods with a couple of clones while the originals went clothes shopping.

Sure the Sage could just conjure up the clothes with his [Creation of All Things] ability, but where was the fun with that?

Plus, both knew squat about what was and wasn't fashionable.

That said, Naruto had chosen a shop near the ex-Titan Queen's address and decided he and his son needed a makeover, much to the staff's displeasure. The man knew they were being a bother so resolved to leave the workers with tips bigger than their respective salaries for the trouble the father and son duo caused.

But looking at his child now, the Sage knew it was all worth it.

A pair of small brown khaki pants complimented the moss-green cardigan and white shirt the younger Uzumaki wore for a top. The outfit was topped with a pair of Italian black leather shoes, all of it of a chic brand.

And yet, it was still somehow… lacking.

'Hmmm… hmmm…' the man thought while looking around the mess he had inadvertently caused in his search for the perfect outfit.

He needed one last thing to really top off the cute look.

A necklace? Not good.

A tie? Nah… too formal.

'Hmmmmmm'

His eyes landed on a black bow tie before he snatched it off the ground. Crouching down in front of Zetsu, Naruto tied the item around his neck before covering his eyes and turning the boy around to face a mirror.

"Alright" Naruto looked around for a moment before looking at his son again and smiling "Change back, Boyo"

Zetsu sighed but obeyed. His skin turned an inky black, his yellow hair became the same shade of green as the cardigan, small horns grew atop his head, his nose, lips, and ears vanished while his mouth elongated and teeth sharpened.

Looking at his boy's shaggy hair, Naruto frowned before a wooden comb grew out of his palm and he passed it through the green locks, pushing them down and to the side a bit. He'll of course do a better job later with an actual comb but this

Naruto smiled before uncovering his son's eyes, revealing the yellow dot-like eyes the boy sported.

"~ Ta-daaaa ~" The man sang before making jazz hands, showing the boy his work.

Zetsu hated every moment of this torture that his Pops had seen fit to put him through.

The man saw an opportunity and much like a fox, pounced on it.

What with the arrangement they made with Rhea and Hestia, and thus the need to, as proper decorum dictates, "dress to impress", the Sage had seen fit to force his son into snazzy child-sized outfits… and the occasional bunny suit.

They've been at it for a couple of hours. It was Hell.

Zetsu knew it had something to do with the scrapbook his Pops was so obsessed with filling up. He swore on his uncles' tails to destroy the damn thing if he ever got his hands on it.

"First impressions are a huge thing in these kinds of formal meetings! Ya gotta show class ya know?" his father said as Zetsu looked at the latest ensemble the man put him in, and blinked at the sight.

There was only one sensible response to this.

"I look like a dork!"

"Ah-ah! I think you mean you look like a classy dork!" the man rebuked him with a waving finger, as his grin, if possible, grew bigger.

"POPS!"

"Ah trust me Zetsu! I've been to these sorta meetings, you gotta take the diplomatic route, make sure they know who you are but also put them at ease. So you have to look your best while also not coming off as a pompous prick. It's that small grey area between simple and grandiose. You get me?"

"...I want to give myself a wedgie" the younger immortal deadpanned as he looked at himself in the mirror.

'I need to make sure no one back home sees me in this or-' his thoughts were interrupted by a horrifying sound that spelled his doom.

Click

"Bahaha! That's a nice one for the scrapbook!" the man guffawed like a donkey, his trusty polaroid camera in hand.

"POPS! COME ON!" Zetsu immediately lunged at his father, aiming for the picture in his hand as the man sealed the camera into his palm, and held his son back with that same hand, the other continuously shaking the printed picture.

As Zetsu fought in vain with his father, even shifting his shape to coil around the man's limbs, Naruto laughed in amusement and proceeded to rough house with his dear child.

Meanwhile, the poor worker was left unconscious in a pile of clothes.

"Just so you know? I'm proud of you!" Naruto's grin was replaced with a genuine smile, as he lowered a hand on his sulking son's head, ruffling his green hair affectionately.

"Huh?" Zetsu looked up from the ground, still in his new clothes and brooding about his potentially ruined reputations.

Especially with his family.

Then again, his younger sisters and Aunts already treated him as a plush toy so that would just increase the intensity of their coddling.

"You managed to extend a hand in friendship and take the first steps towards us potentially avoiding any conflict with the Greeks. Heck, you're the reason we stayed undercover for so long. You did good my boy, real good…" the blond patted the green-haired Uzumaki on the head.

Naruto was a proud Papa. His son never ceased to amaze him. From being a Jutsu creating genius to his phenomenal skills in stealth and infiltration, Zetsu was the ideal Shinobi and part of the Sage wished his old comrades would've seen him if only to, as all dads like to, "flex" his superior parenting and skills on them.

And now? Naruto could safely add diplomacy to the list of skills his son was acquiring. That was a big step from the formerly cynical and pessimistic person he used to be.

If nothing else, Zetsu was proof Naruto wasn't a bad dad. Despite growing up an orphan and a social outcast, getting drafted into a war against seemingly countless enemies, and even witnessing his entire world ending, the man was able to safely put all that behind him when it came to raising his child.

He wasn't like his own father. While Minato Namikaze was a great leader and even had good intentions in the end, he was far from a stellar parent. Naruto had long since forgiven his dad for burdening him with a hard life but he would never forget about the mistakes he made, and the importance of not replicating them.

He wanted Zetsu to enjoy life above all else and live happily even as an immortal. To that end, he had resolved to shoulder as much weight as he needed to do so to ensure his children had a life they could spend without regrets.

Like any parent, nothing pleased him more than to see his kid growing up and realizing their potential. The Sage still remembered how "cold" his son acted in his earlier years. The kid was hauntingly similar to the original Zetsu, what with his almost robotic attitude, his yandere-like loyalty, his ruthlessness to his enemies, and especially his apathy that used to extend to his allies. It had initially worried the father, seeing his dear boy acting so similarly to an old and hated foe.

But as the years went by and their family grew, the younger Uzumaki began to mellow out and even though he kept some of his old mannerisms, as he had shown even recently, he became more accepting and more open to others, especially his own father whom he even started to defy.

His boy, originally born with a mindset Naruto abhorred, that of being a tool to others, had grown into his own person. He'd become independent and even capable of making his own big decisions.

Sure some were still rash due to Zetsu's own lack of tact. The man could still not get over the fact his son infiltrated the Greeks' stronghold by sticking to a goddess's sandal, it was amazing, hilarious, and terrifying.

But all in all? Naruto was feeling a lot of Fatherly Pride™ right now.

...

Said feeling was shattered as he felt a pair of sandals conk him on the head.

"Oi! What the Hell, Boyo?" The man said annoyed.

"Pops! Listen to me already!" Zetsu yelled at him, a leather boot in hand, revealing he's been trying to get his attention for a few minutes now, even going so far as to tug the man's shorts down to his knees.

"Huh?" The man adjusted his shorts, seemingly unbothered by flashing his boxers in a public place. "What? What is it Zetsu? You say something?" The blond chose to respond in a fitting manner to his son's actions.

Zetsu glared at the man.

"I was asking," the younger Uzumaki said annoyed "what about you?"

"What about what?" Naruto titled his head in confusion.

"If I dress like a geek, you're dressing like one too! For God's sake Pops! You're still in Crocs! You look like a beach bum, and you don't get me started on the Ramen print boxers!" The younger Uzumaki gestured to the man's attire wildly.

Facing this onslaught of criticism, Naruto looked down at himself and came to a similar realization.

"...Ah poop"

About an hour later

Zetsu, now clad in a pair of shorts and nothing else, sat facing the curtains of the shop's dressing room. He'd seen his father come out in various outfits and combinations and proceeded to sadistically shoot down and criticize every single one of them.

Yes, he was petty, and yes, his pops completely deserved it.

But it was also necessary.

His pops' fashion sense was, as his Aunts Matatabi and Kokuo would put it… Eh.

There was no other way to describe it, the man was obsessed with three things: Orange, Ramen, and Humor. So it made sense why his appearance usually fell into one or more of these categories, such as the initial outfit he came to the US in.

But even his father knew how important this meeting was, so it wasn't a surprise to Zetsu when he'd agreed without much protest to play dress up. That, and Zetsu had also threatened to tell Amaterasu their father put Shinto-Greek relations in jeopardy with his antics. Needless to say, the threat of his the man's "darling ray of sunshine" getting upset with him had him looking for the fanciest and classiest suit the store had to offer with gusto.

Zetsu debated on whether he should have his pops simply conjure a suit since he now had an idea of what to look like…

Naaah

'Let him squirm a bit more huehuehuehuehue' The lad inwardly cackled.

'Ummm… Am I interrupting something?' a female voice echoed in his mind.

"Gah!" the green-haired Uzumaki jolted in surprise.

"Huh? Boyo! You okay?" The curtains of the dressing room parted briefly for Naruto to peek through.

"It's nothing Pops, now get back to changing, I wanna see you looking like a penguin hehe" Zetsu laughed a bit forcefully, making his father groan and retreat back inside.

Seeing the coast was clear, the shorter Uzumaki addressed the sudden visitor 'Big- err Hestia?' he caught himself 'What do you need? Also, can you stop popping up like that? Give me a warning first'

Said goddess audibly giggled in response 'Sorry Zetsu, I simply wanted to check in on you two. Are you in New York now?'

'Yeah we're like two blocks away from the address you gave us, Pops wanted to get some new clothes because the hundreds of outfits we had back home clearly weren't enough' the Uzumaki thought back sarcastically.

'Ufufufu, I take it you're not having fun?' Zetsu could practically feel her smirking through the link.

'I am now. But that's only after hours of torture to end up looking like a nerd' he attempted to convey his grouchiness through the mental link and was rewarded with the feeling of a shoulder pat.

'I'm sure it wasn't that bad, and that you look great' Hestia tried to placate him.

'You don't know what I mean' he growled to himself, only to feel the goddess uncharacteristically roll her eyes.

'Oh trust me...I do,' The greenette felt the goddess of Family cut the link after that cryptic answer, leaving him wondering about what she meant.

A feeling of dread crawled up his back, making him shiver just as his father emerged from the dressing room.

Rhea's Penthouse, sometime later

Hestia, while optimistic, was having her patience tested in a similar way to the Uzumaki lad.

As she sat in a gorgeous-looking toga, one designed by Aphrodite herself to look as if it was made of flowing flames in a beautiful mix of dark orange and red. Hestia had even managed to convince the love goddess to keep the design conservative, much to said fashionista's chagrin.

Unlike their two guests, both Greek immortals had a much easier time picking out their clothes. Seeing as both had much more experience in professional or high-class settings, all Hestia had to do was summon that one dress she used for such occasions. She didn't really care for extravagances like her sisters or some of the more feminine goddesses, even if Aphrodite always badgered her to accept her new designs, some of which revealed more skin than the Eldest Olympian was comfortable showing.

The goddess sat on a plush chair in the hallway leading to one of her mother's walk-in closets and tapped her heel-clad feet on the ground as the ex-Titan Queen was continued rummaging through the bric-a-brac in the large room.

"Oh, Tia! How about this one?" Rhea held up an item from the door.

"It's nice Mom" was the daughter's curt reply.

"But don't you think it's too flaunty? I don't want to come off as a pompous woman" the mother's voice echoed from the closet, showing some worry.

"Mom, trust me… it's nice" Hestia insisted as she rubbed the bridge of her nose.

"But the others were too… thin," the titaness replied.

"Mom… I doubt Mr. Naruto and Zetsu are going to care much about the cutlery or the color of the plates, they'll mostly be focused on the food." The goddess said firmly.

She had been watching her mother rummage through her extensive collection of plates, bowls, and accessories for an hour now. She heard her mother hum in thought, before letting out an "Ah!" and pushing some of the bigger boxes aside with a flick of her wrist to reveal what she needed.

When Rhea came out, Hestia raised an eyebrow in surprise. "I don't know about that collection, the others were fine but that one's a bit… bizarre," she said hesitantly.

"Huhuhu! I'm suuure," her mother assured her as she came out with a larger but notably dustier box than the rest.

Her mother was dressed just as well, if not better than the goddess, but that was partly because the woman could throw on literally anything and make it look amazing.

One of her domains as a titaness was beauty after all.

The more family-friendly immortal did, however, have to steer her mother away from her more 'revealing' outfits for this one occasion. No offense to her dear parent, but the titaness did not understand how much attention she tended to attract from men in general, let alone fellow immortals.

Any potential suitors usually kept their distance because Rhea's children, her included, drove them off.

Yes, she was a Mama's girl. Her siblings thought no different either since they tended to let their mother coddle them without shame.

That being said, Rhea still looked breathtaking as ever in a custom white empire gown dress, having been adjusted to fit her larger size. The dress seemed to take some inspiration from the more frilly styles of the first half of the twentieth century but was also adapted to not look out of place in a modern setting. It stretched down to her sandal-clad feet (unlike her daughter, Rhea found no use in high heels), and was topped off with a front knot at the waist that seemed to only emphasize her curves while the outfit still left much to the imagination.

Both immortals had favored very little makeup aside from Rhea applying some lipstick, and their hair was let down in both cases, letting their respective chestnut-brown and ebony-black curls cascade down their backs.

As for accessories, only the titaness opted to wear a pair of emerald earrings that matched her eyes and made them pop.

All in all, both ladies were ready to receive...

Ding Doooong

And just in time too!

Rhea hurriedly moved to the large dining room where a beautifully crafted mahogany table sat. She took the box of cutlery in one hand and twirled her other hand, wordlessly making the box's contents set themselves perfectly on the table, while the box itself was returned to the closet.

Checking on the food she prepared and being satisfied by the smell and taste, she speed-walked back to the front door where her daughter stood waiting for her.

"Comiiiinnng~" The titaness sang as she came up to the entrance.

With a swift swing, the door came open and Rhea's eyebrows raised in surprise.

'Oh, hello~' she mused appreciatively.

With the Uzumakis, a few minutes earlier

"Wooo that is one fancy hotel!" Naruto whistled as he faced the large skyscraper where their hosts for the night awaited them.

"Seeing who Hestia's mom is, I guess that's a given" Zetsu spoke up from next to him, clad in his disguise for the moment. He briefly sensed the large energy signature enveloping the structure, figuring out it was probably a barrier of some sort akin to a privacy seal, it seemed to absorb whatever noise came from both sides of it and the Uzumaki even noticed people deliberately avoiding the building, as if it wasn't there in the first place, while only a few ever entered the front doors.

He was sure his father felt it as well.

"Eh, I guess, though I feel like our gift is a little underwhelming" the elder blond pulled on a sack he had slung over his shoulder.

"It's rare enough to be good for a first meeting," the younger blond said with a shrug as he looked up to the man.

The whiskered blond had ended up choosing a black three-piece suit and had altered it slightly to fit some orange accents to the outer-lining of the jacket while opting for an orange bow tie. He had joked about wearing a top hat and monocle as well but Zetsu, not knowing whether his father was serious or not, had almost started a fight out of exasperation.

Thankful his father had gone with a relatively "normal" choice, the younger Uzumaki walked in front of the man and entered the building. Immediately, both felt a shift in the air, noting the overwhelming energy that felt tangible in the air. The lobby itself was gigantic, almost the size of a ballroom with various priceless decorations, Greek statues, and other pieces of art littering it, all under a giant crystal chandelier.

Another curious observation was the busy staff on the ground floor who seemed to be an assortment of different creatures, mostly nature spirits, satyrs, and the few mortals who either had a distinct signature (demigods) or lacked one (probably clear-sighted).

Zetsu chose to keep his disguise, for now. Odds are his appearance would alarm even these folks.

All Naruto could do was whistle again while his son looked around curiously before his eyes landed on the elevator. Tugging his father in its direction, the golden doors opened and a Satyr wearing a bellboy's attire greeted them.

"Floor?" the goat man asked in a voice that conveyed how utterly bored he was.

"Top floor please" was Naruto's reply, making the man straighten up in surprise at the answer and put on a too-large smile as his demeanor did a 180.

"Of course Good Sirs! Please allow me!" the Satyr said with a sugary sweet tone and motioned to carry the sack on the blond's shoulder.

"Nah thanks, just get us up please," the man replied with an amused smile as the bellboy obediently pressed a button.

…

It didn't take long to reach the Penthouse floor but even then, Naruto had taken to humming the elevator music before Zetsu lightly hit him on the stomach to shut him up.

The man snickered at his son's annoyance, knowing he was still bummed about his outfit…

...and the dopy haircut.

Heh

...

Naruto whistled a third time as the doors opened to reveal the top floor's hallway, furnished with a selection of Persian carpets and porcelain busts every few feet.

"Can you stop doing that every two minutes? We haven't even gotten to the room yet" Zetsu complained as he came trudging out of the elevator.

"I dunno how else to show my amazement. This is some fancy stuff, reminds me of Susano'o's crib whenever I dropped in, except there are fewer statues of himself. At least we know the lady doesn't have that big an ego! Bahahaha!" Naruto emerged behind his son, leaving behind a confused Satyr as the elevator doors closed.

"I guess…" the younger Sage reluctantly admitted. His relationship with the two brothers of Amaterasu was bordering on hostile seeing as Susano'o and Tsukuyomi never outgrew their jealousy of their sister and viewed the Uzumaki family as unwanted intruders due to their 'not godly' nature.

"Oh, I can't wait to see Hestia-chan again! I got a Fatherly Headpat™ with her name on it!" the blond flexed his free hand and cracked its fingers in anticipation.

"Poooops! Can you behave?" Zetsu hissed.

"You're telling me to behave? Look at you dragging your feet like it'll make you taller! Bahahahaha!" the man didn't seem to care and smacked the boy on his back.

"Come on! Please don't do this here!" the son groaned.

"Then stand up straight Boyo! This ain't the gallows! We gotta look our best!" Naruto finally said with some measure of seriousness just as they got to the door.

Standing up straight and adjusting his bow tie, Naruto raised his free hand and rang the doorbell.

Ding Doooong

He suddenly felt a bit nervous. It was as if he just now realized how important that meeting was to the future of their stay and how high the stakes were. As a bead of sweat formed on his brow and he continued to wait a few minutes in silence, he hesitantly raised his fingers to ring the bell again, only to hear a muffled "Coming~ " from behind the door.

Not a few seconds later, the door swung open and Naruto found himself staring eye-level at the biggest bosom he had ever seen in his twelve millennia of life.

Briefly, he pondered on the fact this woman somehow beat Tsunade Senju in the chest department, before his brain caught up with him and he raised his eyes quickly.

His sun-like eyes finally met with a pair of emerald-green eyes.

'Woah Momma' was the only thought that came to him.

A/N: Naruto remembered how Boruto® massacred his boy Gaara and decided Zetsu needed G-Man's yee yee ass haircut.

Yes, Rhea totally has the same dress as you-know-who, and yes I did write around 5 K words to say something I could've said in a couple of paragraphs.

Why did I do so?

Because I like writing Naruto and Zetsu's interactions.

Off-topic and SPOILERS AHEAD but I watched Tokyo Revengers and I have to say it was one of the most frustrating animes I've seen.

The storyline and concepts? Solid (initially, it drags on later).

The characters? All good except for one…

Fucking Takemichi.

This guy has to be the most frustrating MC I've come across. I can accept benign cowardly, I can accept being unheroic, some of my favorite characters are classically Underdogs.

But how exactly am I supposed to look at this character without feeling second-hand embarrassment?

From being bullied by children as a TWENTY-SIX-year-old to somehow regressing as a character after developing and gaining some measure of courage and usefulness in the first 10 episodes.

I can not understand how tf I am supposed to react when the MC clearly peaked in middle school, doesn't know how to grow a pair of balls when all he's facing are kids literally 10 to 12 years his juniors and spend 18 minutes of an episode having an inner monologue.

I can get being a coward or being afraid, I can relate to that. But come, the fuck ON! There comes a point where some actual and solid character development has to be had (I know he had that leading up to the Christmas fight but it pretty much gets yeeted out the window in later episodes when he reverts back to being a bitch).