As always, a huge shoutout to my wonderful Patrons: Akamura, Alex P, Andrew Evans, Ant Franklin, Cliford, Cordell Sanders, CrazyMan, David Bowling, David, Emi Stafford, Fallenasgardian, Fenrir Ragnarok, GODA98, Grim90, Iliasse Naji, Jacob Benson, JEP1010, JONATHAN VICARS, Jones4real, jordanitos, Joseph Baty, Joseph Morrison, Josh Watson, Kevin Calderon, Korakas, Lamont Hale, Matthew Burley, McBanjo, Nathaniel Oppegaard, Notadeadguy, Philippa Sale, Radhradh, Rafael Cardenas, Richard Barkley, Ricky Shaffer, Riley Bolerjack, S. , Tomas Sanders, and Willthamann! I do what I do because of you!

Anyway, onto the story!

Chapter 3:

Departure

"Where are we going?" Coby asked as the spy started dragging him away.

"Not here!"

"Oh geez," Amy sighed. "First that then a kid then that again. This is too much. I need to sit down."

"Just another day with the Straw Hats!" Franky laughed. "This is great! This is better than great! It's nothing less than-!" Franky froze, a wave of force passing over the Sunny. "What was that?"

"It felt like Conqueror's Haki," Amy replied. "Strong, too. Something's happening on the archipelago, and I bet you Luffy's involved."

"I'm certain he is," a new voice commented, turning attention on the deck to Rayleigh. "I suggest taking the Sunny to Dock 42 and picking everyone up there. The Marines are in, after all."

Luffy was right about there being more fakes than just the half-crew he had seen before. In fact, the fake Luffy had a whole crew of fakes – sans Brook, Billy, Chopper, and Robin – waiting for him at the rally. That being said, those fakes were nothing less than disappointing. There was no way Zoro would get so fat, Sanji did not look like his wanted poster, Amy was not as thin at a twig with hair the color of sand, Grace didn't have so many warts, and Merry was certainly not physically masculine. Besides, they didn't feel right.

Luffy hid a smirk as he was led to the podium by the fake Gin, a crowd of nearly 100 pirates milling about at the base of the squat brick building they were using as a podium. He'd wanted to break the charade these people were pulling, but he wasn't expecting a crowd this big.

It wouldn't be a problem, but it was a welcome surprise.

"Listen up, you dogs!" the fake Luffy yelled, firing his pistol into the air to get the attentions of the pirates in the crowd. They quieted down quickly, their focus on the fake tub of lard. "As you know, I'm 'Straw Hat' Luffy, the son of Dragon, and you have chosen to join me in my rise to become the King of the Pirates!"

The assorted pirates cheered for the man, which made Luffy raise an eyebrow.

"This rally serves a few purposes," the fake Luffy continued, waving his gun. "First of all, it's so you all can get to know each other. You'll be sailing under my flag together, so you might as well. The second reason, and this is new, is so I can show you what happens when someone pisses me off!" He leveled his gun at their so-called captive, said captive still as a statue.

"This bastard here pissed me off by bumping into me earlier, and if you even think about doing the same, I'll kill you just like him!"


"Shit," a marine watching the proceedings hissed, catching the attention of the communications officer beside him. "We expected retaliation for the capture of Nico Robin, but not this!"

"What is it?" the officer next to him asked, already dialing Marine Captain Sentomaru, the one in charge of this operation.

"They have a new hostage on the stage, a smaller man in a cloak. It looks like they're gonna execute him."


"Hahaha!" a member of the crowd laughed, this man being 'Wet Hair' Caribou, a new big-shot worth 210-million. He was a darker-skinned man with slick, black hair and a habit of sticking out his long, pointed tongue. The sleeves of his white shirt were longer than his arms, leaving them to hang past his hands. "That poor sinner! Let us hear his crimes, so we can pray for his soul, Captain!"

"Right, I agree with you, bro!" 'Blood Splatter' Coribou agreed, bowing. He was the opposite of Caribou; large, pale-skinned, and bald as far as the crowd could tell. A green iguana sat perched on his head, acting like a sort of wig. He had a bounty of 190-million. Much to the crowd's confusion, he was facing away from the stand.

"Turn around, you idiot!"

"Sorry bro! Sorry!" Coribou did not turn around.

"Now this is getting interesting," a pale man covered in cloth bandages muttered, licking one of the four blades between his fingers, one in his right hand and three in his left. This was 'Gashed' Albion, wanted for 92-million.

"Get on with it!" another man demanded, this being 'Lip Service" Doughty, a pirate captain worth 88-million. He was tall and heavy with huge muscles, huge lips, and a serrated sword. "I wanna see if you're as cruel as the rumors say, Cap'n!"

"You gonna shoot me?" the captive on the stand asked, unflinching. The words seemed to echo over the grove, the fake Sanji and Zoro gaping in shock.

"You sound pretty tough for a dead man," the fake Merry laughed, pulling out a standard hammer and hitting the man's shoulder as hard as they could. The cloaked man didn't show any sign of injury. "Huihuihui. You're probably so scared, you don't know how to fear or feel no more."

"Ne, 'e's p'olly got'a... got'a deathwish," the fake Grace slurred with a hiccup, pulling out a flask of some spirits and downing a swig.

"You're right," the fake Amy nodded, her voice as deep as the bottom of the sea. "No other reason to provoke us."

"Listen, I've got places to be and a wife to meet up with," Luffy announced. "Can we get this over with?"

"You're a crazy nutbag, you know that!?" the fake Sanji yelled, his hair standing on end. "Captain Luffy's gonna kill you, and you're talking about walking away!"

The 'captive' turned, staring the behatted man dead in the eye, which caused the so-called captain to step back, even as he raised his gun.

"Guns aren't for threats," the backpacked teen said, his voice reaching the pirates below. "You don't threaten people with guns. Those are for action. Do it. Shoot me. You won't."

"I will, you bastard!" the imposter growled, reaiming. "Die!"

Luffy didn't move as the man pulled the trigger, the bullet burying itself in his stomach, or that's what it was supposed to do. Instead, the skin there stretched like elastic, converting the bullet's kinetic energy into elastic potential before it began to retract, launching the bullet back from wince it came. Pirates across Grove 46 goggled at the sight, the lead whizzing past the lead fake's face.


"Holy shit," that same marine on the outskirts of Grove 46 muttered, watching the proceedings of the pirate rally through a pair of binoculars.

"What is it?" the marine beside him questioned, taking the tool.

"That's him," the first marine answered, realization dawning on him. "They're fakes. The ones we've been chasing are fakes."

"But we just caught the Devil Child and the Monster Doctor..."

"Did we? That guy in the leopard skin... I think he's the real one. Their captive is the real Straw Hat."


"Shishishi!" Luffy laughed, throwing his head back. "Shishishishi! If you're gonna fake being me, at least try to look like me!" The young pirate threw his cloak off, revealing his youthful face and wide smile to the pirates around.

"That's the real Straw Hat!" Albion yelled. "That means he didn't become fat and ugly! This guy was just fat and ugly to begin with!"

"My Goda," Doughty breathed, a hand on his heart as if witnessing a miracle.

"Hahaha!" Caribou laughed. "A fake tried to shoot the guy he was copying, but it doesn't work on him! Hahaha! Coribou, are you seeing this shit?"

"No, Bro! Sorry, Bro!"

"Turn around, you moron!"

On the stage, Luffy grabbed the fake him by the shirt, lifting the man into the air and dangling him over the edge. The false captain was caught off guard, dropping his smoking gun to the floor. The fake crew stood staring, jaws agape, as Luffy faced the crowd.

"Everyone, listen up!" the teen yelled, a wave of force building around him. The fake dangled from the pirate's slender arm, no sign of strain on the smaller man's face despite the obvious weight of his new captive. "I'm Monkey D. Luffy, captain of the Straw Hat Pirates, and all of you are fired!"

"N-N-N-Now h-hold on a s-second," the fake Gin stuttered as the imposter in Luffy's grip started struggling. "M-Maybe we can w-w-w-work s-something out?"

"Hey, man," Luffy muttered, one eye on the fake him in his hold. "You're gonna make me let go if you wiggle like that."

The man froze instantly, hands clutching at Luffy's wrist. Luffy turned, once more addressing the audience, a shining smile on his face. "I've been waiting for this day for two years now. Get ready, world! The Straw Hats are back and I'm... I'm gonna be King of the Pirates!"

With his declaration, he released the building wave of force, Conqueror's Haki surging outward with Luffy's voice. A couple of the pirates fainted, even if Luffy hadn't meant to make his Spirit that strong. He just wanted it big. He wanted attention. He was making his statement and challenge to the world.

And the world answered.

Luffy's eyes widened as he tilted his head quickly three times in succession, swinging the fake him away from the lasers that tried to pierce his face. They impacted the Hustle Muscle Mangrove behind him, exploding. Assorted pirates looked on in shock, many of them turning to find they were surrounded by marines. One particular marine, a tall, round man in red with a captain's coat, stepped forward with two Pacifistas flanking him.

"'Straw Hat' Luffy," Marine Captain Sentomaru growled, pointing his ax at the returning pirate. "I knew you would be here. Turn yourself in and I may be able to get you a lighter sentence."

"Why would I do that?" Luffy responded with a smile. "I've waited and trained for two years for this and I can finally meet my crew again. Why would I stop?" He blinked. "Oh, I know! Let's trade! You can have this guy who says he's me!"

The fake Luffy started struggling. "Waitwaitwait!"

Luffy didn't wait, tossing the imposter across the crowd to land at Sentomaru's feet. The man hit the ground with a sickening crunch and a scream, suggesting something broke.

"My leg!"

Sentomaru only glanced at the man squirming on the ground, favoring a wary gaze at Straw Hat above. "PX-5, who the Hell is this guy?"

The cyborg moved in response to the captain's query, focusing on the pirate rolling around in pain, clutching his right leg.

"Identified," the Pacifista said. "Subject is 'Triple-Tongued' Demaro Black. Bounty, 26-million."

"What?!" the assorted pirates screamed.

"Book it!" the fake Amy yelled, all but one of the false Straw Hats running as fast as they could. The fake Coby tripped, getting pushed off the building to fall before waddling away considering his unhelpful bulk, cradling an arm. The only one to stay was the fake Nami, the woman sliding up to Luffy and grabbing his arm.

"Luffy, baby," she muttered, pulling his arm to her chest. "Those fakes were so convincing! I'm so glad you got here to save me!" She fluttered her eyelashes.

"Are you stupid or something?" Luffy asked, pulling his arm away in disgust. "You aren't Nami. You're the biggest insult to my wife I've ever seen! You're not a very good fake."

"I... Ah... Ge... H-How dare you!" the woman yelled, still trying to keep up the façade. "I am your wife! I'm the greatest good you're ever gonna get!"

"No you're not," Luffy rebuffed, stepping away from her attempt to hug him again. "Nami's taller than you are, and a lot better looking. She feels like a warm fire when I'm near her, and I can taste tangerines and smell ink when I feel her spirit. You make me taste bad seafood."

"I... Wha... Bu...?"

"Hey, Ax Guy! You can have this one, too!"

"Get the Hell away from me!" The fake Nami dodged Luffy's grab, booking it the way the rest of the fakes had run. Luffy watched her go, laughing.

"You think this is funny, Straw Hat?" Sentomaru demanded.

"Actually, yeah," Luffy grinned. "People were pretending to be us! That's funny!"

"We have you surrounded, even with all these other pirates here and I, Sentomaru, former head bodyguard of the genius Vegapunk, am a Marine officer now. I'm taking you in no matter the cost. PX-5, get him!"

Following orders, the Pacifista charged a laser, firing a trio of beams into the crowd of pirates. There were three subsequent explosions, two in the center of the crowd to form something of a path and the last at the base of the brick building. Having cleared a way, the cyborg moved, charging the Supernova.

"Whoa!" Luffy blinked as he started to lose his footing, the squat building crumbling below him. His eyes caught the machine's approach, causing him to plant his feet in preparation to jump. His legs bounced once, his skin turning pink and glossy. "Second Gear!"

The Pacifista fired another laser, but Luffy was no longer there, having disappeared with a Shave to blur out of vision. He reappeared above the Kuma-lookalike, spinning.

"Gum-Gum Jet Battle Ax!"

With a mighty kick, Luffy drove his foot into the cyborg and the cyborg into the ground. It was so forceful that the machine bounced before making the crater, blasting air into the crowd like a slap to the face.

"He's not like the fake at all!" a random pirate screamed. "He took down a Pacifista in one hit!"

"Shit," Sentomaru muttered. "That show earlier suggested it, but that proves it. Straw Hat knows Haki now."

Luffy rolled in the air as his extended leg returned, landing in the crowd which parted for him. He turned a little, grinning back at the pirates.

"Hey," he began. "None of you are part of my crew and I'm not hiring, but I wanted to make some noise so the world knows my crew is back. Wanna help?"

"Well well," Lip Service blinked. "It ain't the invite I wanted, but who can pass up a chance like this?"

"I'm always excited to make a little chaos," Albion replied, licking one of his blades.

"Ahaha! I don't mind!" Caribou laughed. "You're an honest guy, Straw Hat!"

"Yeah, bro. I agree," Coribou nodded, now facing the broken stand.

"Shishishi!" Luffy grinned, taking a fighting stance facing Sentomaru. "Now we're just waiting for three more people."

"Who?" the marine demanded.

"Some friends. They're here."


A few minutes before.

"You overgrown ape!" Sanji yelled, a fiery aura around him. "You clearly still don't know how to treat a woman!"

"You perverted waiter!" Zoro yelled back, a blue aura around him as he shoved his forehead into Sanji's, the two trying to force the other into submission. "Women can do everything guys can! They don't need special treatment!"

"I am not a damn waiter, you uncivilized barbarian!"

"Prove it, Number Eleven!"

"Please," Gin muttered beside them. "Violence ain't th' answer b'tween friends."

"Shut up!" they both roared, rounding on the monk. Gin stood there under their glares, a widening smile on his face even as a yellow aura of his own took shape. Though the auras weren't physically there, the crowd could have sworn they were.

"Violence ain't tha right answer, brothers." Gin pulled his arms from his sleeves, revealing that he'd already been holding his weighted tonfa in preparation to fight. Electricity sparked as he swung, Zoro and Sanji blocking with a sword and a steel-toed dress shoe respectively. "It ain't, but it's tha most fun one!"

The trio's smirks grew and Gin pushed them away, the bystanders around them backing up from the brewing fight. Taking ready stances, the three prepared to charge.

"Here I-" Sanji's call was cut off by an unexpected wave of Conqueror's Haki, the force of Will rolling past them. All three of the pirates felt their eyes widen, a silent agreement forming that they could settle this later.

That force came from the west, behind the chef.

Gin flinched before glancing around, his gaze settling on Grove 46 in the distance.

"Y'all wanna check that out?" he asked, putting his tonfa away. "I betcha we just foun' Don Luffy."

"That's probably for the best," Sanji agreed, pulling out his snail which had a black shell with a crossed fork and knife painted on the side. "Franky warned us about trouble, so I'll let everyone know about it."

Grabbing Zoro by the collar as he started walking the wrong way, Gin ran after Sanji while the latter dialed the number of Franky's snail. The trio was on Grove 48, so they weren't too far away from the action, but the Groves were a lot bigger than maps made them out to be.

"Ow!" Franky yelled from the snail. "What's up, Cook-Bro? Did you feel that?"

"Yeah, we're pretty sure it's Luffy making a mess like usual."

"Ha! The more things change, the more they stay super! Are you just letting us know?"

"I think we'll need ta leave quick-like!" Gin offered, pulling up alongside Sanji with Zoro lifted over his head. "Iffin this is Don Luffy, I get tha feelin' he's got marines on 'im by now."

"I'd suggest docking at Grove 42," a voice suggested, the trio of pirates recognizing it as Rayleigh. "Shakky's contacts told her the fake Straw Hats were holding a rally on Grove 46 and that the Marines were gonna crash it. Looks like Luffy got to them first."

"Of course he would," Zoro growled as Sanji started to hang up, the commotion becoming too loud in the distance to keep up the call. "If someone is getting us, we'll be getting Luffy!"

CA-LICK!

"I was using that!" Zoro growled. Sanji ignored him.

"I'll go scout ahead," the chef sighed, jumping up before using Sky Walk to rise through the air.

"Impressive!" Gin grinned. "Wait fer me, though!"

Sanji glanced back as Gin focused, angel-like wings of lightning sprouting from the Vergian's back before the yellow electricity turned black at the base, the dark color growing until it covered all but the tips of the wings so they were black as the night, making Gin almost look like his namesake; a devil of lightning.

"Lightnin's Ascension," Gin named the technique, throwing Zoro at the blond before rising into the air with a great beat of his new wings, the lightning taking tangible form due to the Armament Haki coating it. Sanji dodged the ballistic swordsman, letting Zoro pass him without a care for the angrily-screaming green-haired man. Gin rose to float next to Sanji, who kept himself in place by kicking the air itself.

"You have wings now?"

"They work," the Logia shrugged, a bead of sweat rolling down his forehead. Zoro crashed in the distance. "I can't stay in th' air fer more'n a few minutes, though."

"Then let's go, before that mosshead ruins everything!"


Boa Hancock stood still as a statue on the deck of the Perfume Yuda, a small telescope in her hand. Her attention was focused on a certain ship with a lion figurehead in the distance as she waited.

"Sissster," Marigold asked beside her. "Are you certain thisss isss necessssary? He-"

"Silence," Hancock ordered, never moving her vision from the ship docked by the grove. "Of course this is necessary. He has resisted me every month for two years now. My pride demands I learn why. Aha!"

On the ship appeared a woman that matched the wanted poster hanging in Hancock's chambers, albeit a breathing, three-dimensional specimen lacking arrow holes. Not only was she older than the picture on the wanted poster, but the two years of separation had treated her looks well and she had a large duck that fit Luffy's descriptions of Billy. The outside of the telescope cracked in the Warlord's grip.

"She is beautiful," the woman admitted with a growl, "but that does not explain his devotion. Every month I tried to seduce Monkey D. Luffy and every month he rejected me. Me! The most beautiful woman in the world! Can I even claim that title when there is a man that does not want me?"

"Sissster, perhapsss it isss time to let it go?" Sandersonia tried, only to jump back in fear as her eldest sister's heeled shoe cracked the deck where she had been standing.

"Be silent as your captain orders you!" The Kuja fell into silence at her command, watching the ship as flying fish appeared to drop a moving skeleton and a pink-haired young man. Even so, Hancock continued to glare at the woman from afar, muttering to herself. "I will defeat you, Monkey D. Nami. You mark my words. Shit, where is she going?"

On the ship of the Thousand Sunny, Nami retreated from where she had been talking with Nico Robin and an unknown man, Billy at her heels.

Much to Hancock's ignorance, a good number of her warriors were hidden by the ports below deck, watching the ship for their own reasons. Now that the newest members knew that men existed, they needed to learn all they could about this potential enemy. That some of them were ruggedly handsome on that ship was simply a bonus.

"Oh, look at that one!" Margaret noted, focusing on the roset that had just arrived.

"No, that one's the best," Sweet Pea insisted, zeroing in on a shirtless man with a long nose.

"What of the man in the suit?" Blue Fan questioned. "Is he a new member? I don't remember seeing a poster for him among the crew."

"Hahaha!" Daisy laughed as she inspected the form of a man with arms make of metal. "I'm pretty sure not all men are part machine!"

"But the women on that ship look very strong," Nerine noted, writing in her notebook. "Oh, something's changing!" The Amazons that had spyglasses focused near the center of the deck where a young woman with colorlful hair had grabbed the collar of the roset. She spun them, dipping him into a position to press their lips together. "What is that?"

"I'm not sure how I feel about that image," Margaret commented. "I don't know what they are doing. Is it a certain reunion ritual?"

"That's called a kiss," Blue Fan whispered to the newest member of the crew. "It's for romance."

"Hurk," Margaret coughed, throwing up a little at the thought. Romance? As in attraction? With a man?

"There you are," Boa Hancock smirked as Nami returned from a room on the third floor. "What are you hiding, you hussy? I... No...! It can't be!"

"What isss it?" her sisters asked, Hancock's shaking hands dropping the telescope to the deck. She followed soon after, trying to come to terms that there just might be one man alive who doesn't and who may never want her.

"That woman… That one whose mere existence… crushed my scope of reality," Hancock whispered. Her fists clinched, wisps of her Conqueror's Spirit leaking from her body as visual distortions in the air. "She has laid a claim to Monkey D. Luffy that I can never hope to take. Not so long as I wish to keep my power and titles."

"Sister, what isss it?" Marigold hissed. "Isss there sssome way we can help?"

"No, Mari. Monkey D. Luffy is, perhaps, a..." she choked, not wanting to admit it. "A lost cause."

A tear rose and fell unbidden from the Warlord's eyes as the goal that had become something of an obsession over the last couple of years started to flicker out, taking with it every truth she used to understand the world. Losing her worldview would leave her dazed and confused, and her sisters knew this. If a man could resist her forever, would the sunrise be the next truth to fail? Would water cease to be wet and fire cease to be hot? "That wife of his... She has a child."

"But, sisster!" Sandersonia pointed out, grasping at straws in the hope of saving her eldest sister's mental state. "We don't have proof that that child isss the sspawn of Luffy. Perhapss she hass not been faithful? They were ssseparated for two yearss, after all."

Hancock's eyes widened as the possibility arose. Yes, that could be it. If she could prove Monkey D. Nami's infidelity, Luffy would be hers for the taking, both achieving her goal and proving the worldview Luffy had so casually shattered. Her thoughts fizzled as a wave of Haki raced over the ship. Hancock licked her lips.

Perhaps she wouldn't kill Luffy right after she wins him over. Amazon Lily does need an heir, after all, and Luffy has very good genes. That didn't mean he would get her help, though. The greater he became, the greater her reward in the end. And if he died, then there was no more problem. With him gone, then once again, every man would desire her, even if he never did.

"Sonia, Mari, gather the crew," she ordered, standing. "Our work here is done. We are leaving."

"But sissster, you know there are many mar-"

"We are leaving," Hancock reaffirmed, glancing back at the ship. "We'll see them again. Luffy will return to us, to me, eventually."

Because she was beautiful, and beautiful people always get what they want.


"Shishishi!" Luffy grinned, taking a fighting stance facing Sentomaru. "Now we're just waiting for three more people."

"Who?" the marine demanded.

"Some friends. They're here." Having said his part, Luffy jumped back, making space between himself and Sentomaru where Zoro landed hard, groaning. The marine's eyes widened and pirates gasped as the man shook the fall off, grumbling.

"Godadamn Swirly Brow," he cursed, cracking his neck. "I'll get you back for that one."

"It's him!" a nameless pirate cried, clutching a wanted poster. "It's the real Pirate Hunter!"

"Identified," PX-7 said. "Sensei of the Survivor 'Pirate Hunter' Roronoa Zoro. Bounty, 175-million."

"That's new," Zoro blinked as he heard the title and bounty. Not that he was opposed to it, it just was. He blinked again as his Observation Haki flared, swinging Kitetsu III out to cut an approaching laser in half. The offending beam split down the middle, exploding a harmless distance from the swordsman and Luffy, said explosions sending unfortunate marines flying. He replaced his sword, turning to see the smiling face of his captain. "Oh. Hey Luffy. You got here last."

"Zoro!" Luffy grinned. "You fell out of the sky! Do you do that a lot now?"

"No. It's their faults." The swordsman gestured over his shoulder with a thumb as Sanji and Gin touched down on the grass, Gin with a flourish as his electric wings dissipated in a crack of thunder, stray bolts searing bits of grass.

"So cool!" Luffy gushed.

"Show off," Sanji muttered around his cigarette, grinning as the two and Zoro took spots flanking their captain.

"It's my firs' time out with tha wings," Gin shot back. "Let me live a little."

"They're actual badasses!" the pirates cried in shock. "They aren't like the fakes at all!"

"Oh, I guess you dealt with the fake us, huh Luffy?" Zoro grinned, pulling out Wado Ichimonji.

"Yeah, it was fun!" Luffy laughed. "The fake you was fat and got along with the fake Sanji. And the fake Gin had an afro and a battery!"

"This changes nothing!" Sentomaru yelled to his fellow marines. "There are simply four Straw Hats to capture over one. Men, get the other pirates! PX-7, get them!"

"Identified," PX-7 acknowledged, taking aim at the group. "Pirates 'Straw Hat' Luffy, 'Pirate Hunter' Zoro, 'Electric Devil' Gin, and an unknown affiliated to the Straw Hat Pirates. Engaging."

"You wanna say that again, you tin can!" Sanji roared as fire exploded around him, Zoro laughing in the background. The Pacifista moved, but Sanji, Gin, and Zoro moved faster, all three behind it in the blink of an eye. Luffy coated his forearm in Armament Haki and blocked the ax Sentomaru aimed for their backs. Bits of black lightning surged and fizzled as Luffy's Haki scraped against Sentomaru's. The Pacifista, suddenly bearing all the damage the elemental trio had dealt, sparked.

"That's what happens when you fight 'Black Leg' Sanji," the cook nodded, his leg still on fire.

"Yeah right, Shit Chef," Zoro growled, sliding his swords back after using his 72 Caliber Phoenix. "It was my cut that killed him!"

"I broke his neck, Marimo!"

"Brothers, please," Gin muttered, stepping between them. "Obviously it was my lightnin' an' tonfa that sealed 'is fate."

The Pacifista exploded behind them.

"They killed a Pacifista in no time flat!" the assorted pirates, once again, screamed. "Impossible!"

"Bye!" Luffy yelled, waving at the rest of the pirates. "We're leaving! Good luck not getting caught! Shishishi!"

"You're leaving us behind?!" the crowd cried.

"Yeah!" Luffy answered easily, glancing around as his Observation picked up something. "You've got your own crews and mine is here to get me! Everyone, jump!" Luffy pushed Sentomaru back, sending the marine skidding, and jumped as high as he could. The trio behind him shrugged and jumped as well, just in time for a trio of flying fish to swoop down and grab them. Pirates and marines alike gawked as the Straw Hats disappeared into the distance.

"Dammit!" Sentomaru screamed, his voice echoing through the grove under Luffy's laughter. "Chase them down!"

The captain and first mate clung to either side of one fish, Sanji and Gin each on their own as Grove 46 shrunk behind them.

"Shishishi!" Luffy laughed. "That was so much fun! I knew you guys would find me."

"We just had to follow the sounds of chaos," Sanji replied, holding out a new cigarette that Gin threw a tiny lightning bolt into, lighting it for him. "Come on. Everyone's waiting for us at the Sunny."

"Wait, hold on!" Luffy called, grabbing the side of the fish's mouth to make it turn around in the air. "Circle this hill!"

"But the marines-" the pilot tried before noticing a figure below them. He nodded, doing as Luffy commanded.

"Raaayyylliiieeegghh!" the teen yelled as the fish arched around him, the call slowing the pursuing marines to a halt in fear. On the hill, the white-haired man in question smiled up at the young man. "Thanks for everything, Rayleigh! For everything you've done for us these last two years, both me and Coby! I'll make you proud! Just like your captain and Ace's dad, I'm gonna be... The King of the Pirates!"

"I expect nothing less," the man smirked. "Go! Live your dream in the New World!"

He and Luffy shared a smile before the flying fish turned, carrying the four crewmates back toward their ship. The man on the hill, however, turned toward the marines while pulling out a simple sword. He slashed, tearing a gash between himself and the hoard of lawmen. "I think that's far enough. Just let the man sail."

"Shishishi!" Luffy laughed, the widest of smiles stretched across his face. "I can't wait to see everyone! I haven't even seen Coby these last two years, and we only talked a couple of times. He wrote me letters, though." The captain turned, eyeing the three most powerful of his crew sans himself. "Hey, why didn't you guys write me letters?"

"I was fighting monkeys," Zoro answered.

"I was fighting for my masculinity," Sanji shivered.

"I prayed fer ya," Gin offered. Their fish swerved and gunshots fired below them, a platoon of Marines from the next grove trying to bring them down. "Shall I handle this?"

"Don't worry about it," Zoro waved off as the shots lessened. Down below, all the marines had flopped to the ground, moaning about how sad and pathetic their lives were. "Oh great. Here she comes."

"How dare you!" a woman's voice demanded, the grown-up and ghostly form of Perona flying beside them. Two Hollows circled her, laughing. The Rosey Life Riders helping them screamed. "You wouldn't have gotten to this island or survived those years without my help, and you're trying to leave without saying goodbye?! How rude!"

"Shut up!" Zoro shot back. "You knew we were leaving today for a week now!"

"A real-life woman!" Sanji noodled, blood firing from his nose. The rider of the fish carrying him grabbed the cook's shirt to keep him from falling off.

"Ugh!" Perona sniffed. "Fine! Leave! See if I care! I hope you crash and die!" With an angry huff, Perona flew away, Zoro grumbling under his breath about annoying bear costumes.


"Units report!" Sentomaru ordered into his snail, his considerable bulk moving faster than any normal person would think it should as he tried to chase down the Straw Hats, but with no direct path over the "land" of the archipelago, he was much slower than the flying fish. "The Straw Hats must have met back up on Grove 42 by now! Why don't I hear gunfire?"

"It seems all of the units have been waylaid by something, sir!" the marine on the other end answered, papers rustling as if he pulled out a list. "The unit on Grove 40 reported giant bugs stopping their forward motion and the unit on 41 is caught in a rainstorm that has ruined all their gunpowder."

"What?!"

"Unit 43 is fighting mecha-animals that refuse to let them near the shore and Unit 44 has fallen into a severe depression!"

"The whole unit?"

"Yessir! And Unit 47 has run into..." he trailed off, as if not sure about what he was reading. "Oh shit."

"What is it?" Sentomaru demanded. "Spit it out, soldier!"

"It seems Unit 47 is facing a Yonko's daughter and a squad of monks, and Unit 48 has been attacked by revolutionaries!"


On Grove 47, a certain female long-arm spun, her sword cutting through air and flesh before she kicked, backflipping toward a mass of brown, the lead of whom punched a marine away without a sound. The long-arm loved this, the fight, the fear in her opponents' eyes. She'd never had that before.

"I don't know who you guys are," Myukuru began, leveling her sword at the hesitant marines, "but anyone who punches these self-righteous shits is ok by me."

"We are friends of the Straw Hats," the lead monk muttered. "Brother Gin was an excellent student."

"Oh-ho!" Myukuru cheered. "You have to tell me about him considering I've spent the last couple years with someone convinced she's his fiancée. Or at least pretending to be."

"...Perhaps we can deal with this first?"

"Oh, you're right," Myukuru blinked, lowering her stance to charge. "I'm Myukuru, by the way."

"You may call me Zeus."

"What does this mean?" the lead marine questioned, studying his foes as the two sides reevaluated each other. "That one fits the description of Charlotte Myukuru, daughter of Big Mom, and the robes of those monks are similar to 'Mad Monk' Urogue. Have they formed an alliance?"

"Wrong!" Myukuru laughed, spinning her sword. "Bring it, you Marine bastards!"


"Zes-zes-zes!" a short figure laughed on Grove 48, his two six-shooters firing methodically. A human-bee flew over him, her rapier and stinger regularly stabbing marines who approached his blind spot. "I've missed the thrill of battle! Do you not agree, Ms. Mothersday?*"

"Absolutely, Mr. 6!" the woman buzzed. "I'm still surprised we're making such a connection!"

"I still don't know who you two are," a woman with brown hair in a bob style commented, slinging water at a group of soldiers. "Fishman Karate: Tidal Wave!"

"We are, how you say, double faces of the light and dark," Mr. 6 explained cryptically, throwing a business card to the Revolutionary. "Anything you need, we can get. This could be a beautiful partnership. Da Vinci is at your service."

"Right. Nice to meet you…?" the revolutionary muttered, no idea what such a convoluted answer was meant to say. She diverted her focus. "Oh hey, more marines!"

"Hey, Miltia," Melanie asked her sister while they watched the battle from afar. "What do you think? Should we try spreading the Red Ember's influence with long-distance partners? I'm sure that would make Junior happy."

"And maybe we could get pictures of our dear Coby sometimes if we have more connections," Miltia nodded. "I've been itching to fight more people than drunken idiots and armored guards."


"You haven't mentioned Unit 45," Sentomaru pointed out. "Why aren't they advancing to Grove 42 as we speak?"

"Sir, we may have to consider that unit lost."

"Why?"

"The last communication we received for them said… Well... No, sir, I can't describe it. The sounds that came from that snail… the screams… The giggles… They are lost."

Sentomaru was silent for a long moment before facing the sky. "Fucking piraaaaaates!"


"Ugh!" Perona sniffed. "Fine! Leave! See if I care! I hope you crash and die!" With an angry huff, Perona flew away, Zoro grumbling under his breath about annoying bear costumes.

"Somethin' wrong, Brother Zoro?" Gin teased. "Trouble in paradise?"

"Bite me, Battery Monk!" Zoro yelled. The flying fish took another left turn, banking around mangrove 42 to finally bring the Thousand Sunny into view. Seeing them, the ship gave a mighty roar that echoed over the waves.

"Woah!" Luffy gasped. "How did Franky do that?!"

"Nah, Don," Gin corrected. "Sunny did that. She's alive like Merry. Jus' can't manifest."

"That's even better!"

"They're here!" Usopp yelled from the crow's nest, catching the attention of the fliers. "Luffy! Zoro! Gin! Sanji!"

Sanji, finally recovering from his nosebleed, blinked the spots out of his eyes as they approached. His gaze narrowed in on a few key images: Amy and Grace talking to each other, Merry and Robin discussing some symbols on a page in the latter's hand, and Nami stepping out of the room next to the captain's suite. His brain, after experiencing two years of horror in Kamabakka Kingdom and already having a weakened resistance from his run-ins with various beauties around the archipelago, overloaded. His shirt tore as the force of his nosebleed fought against the grip of his driver, said nosebleed launching him into the ocean.

"Sanji!" Chopper cried, diving in after him.

"Not you too!" Coby shouted as Merry jumped to save the doctor and chef. The flying fish circled the ship as they descended, ropes moving of their own accord to form a ladder on the side where Merry was performing the rescue.

"Luffy!"

Hearing his name, the captain followed the sound of the voice to see Nami on the third floor of the ship outside their room, waving. Her hair was a lot longer than it had been and she was only wearing a bikini top and a pair of jeans. A bright smile lit up his world as he stared, dumbfounded. Without his notice, a little trickle of blood flowed from his own nose at the sight.

"Luffy! Catch me!"

Luffy gasped as Nami climbed onto the railing and threw herself off, prompting him to jump from the fish and fall toward her. In a second, the captain caught his wife and spun, placing himself underneath her before expanding into a Gum-Gum Balloon to cushion their fall. He bounced twice before deflating, leaving him hugging the woman he'd married, her hands fisting his open shirt as she soaked in his presence.

"I missed you," she whispered with a sniffle, rubbing her cheek against his scarred chest. Luffy sat up, pulling her against him so he could bury his nose in her hair and breathe in the smell that was unique to her. Nami smelled like citrus and ink and just a touch of ozone, which worked surprisingly well and fit her. Wet tears started dripping onto Luffy's chest. "I missed you so much, Luffy."

"I missed you, too," Luffy muttered, Gin and Zoro jumping to the deck as Merry hoisted Sanji and Chopper over the railing. Sanji wasn't looking too good, his nose still leaking blood. Nami didn't care, though. Her whole world consisted of Luffy in that moment. She grabbed his face, dragging him into a hard, deep kiss that he quickly returned.

"I'm sorry," she blinked, burying her face in his neck. Her hold on him tightened. "I'm so sorry, Luffy. I should have been there for you. I should have tracked you down."

"You're here now, and that's what matters," Luffy muttered. "Besides, I'm the one who decided we needed to wait."

"But Luffy-"

"Would you two give it a rest?" Amy sighed. "At this rate, Sunny's gonna be a freaking romantic."

"Better than a pervert," Merry noted as the married couple sorted themselves out. "Who knows what Sanji, Franky, and Brook's personalities will do to Sunny when she's complete?"

"Hey!" two of the three perverts in question shouted, insulted.

"As much fun as this is, we have bigger problems!" Usopp yelled from the crow's nest. "We've got Marine Battleships coming from the sea off the port bow and another one at six o'clock!"

"How did they find us?" Nami asked. "We were careful to let the fakes take their attention while we got away!"

"Oh, I beat up the fakes!" Luffy smiled, bringing the movement of the deck to a halt save for Chopper treating Sanji for blood loss.

"…Why?" his wife demanded. "They were a clear ticket out!"

"Their Nami was an insult to you," Luffy answered simply. "No one is allowed to be you except for you. Especially if they're gonna do such a bad job."

"Luffy..." Nami tried to be mad at him, she really did, but his answer was so honest and genuine and Luffy that the navigator couldn't help the smile that stretched over her face. "Whatever. Let's get out of h-" The Sunny rocked as a trio of cannonballs crashed into the water off the port side, threatening the balance of the crew.

"This is Marine Rear Admiral Wallace of Branch 517!" a voice yelled through a speaker. "Surrender, Straw Hat Pirates, and you shan't be sunk! This is your final warning!" A cannon fired with a boom. "Uhh... I mean that's your final warning!"

"I've got this," Nami began, pulling out her Perfect Clima-Tact, but Amy stepped into her way.

"Allow me," the baker insisted, stepping into the railing. "I want to show off, too." The blonde nodded before dropping her parasol onto the deck and jumping straight toward the projectile. The crew watched in surprise as the woman twisted, catching the cannonball on her shin. Its arc flattened as she and the iron ball flew over the deck, Amy suddenly giving a yell and kicking the ball back. It flew true and just as quickly as before.

"Hit the deck!" Rear Admiral Wallace shouted through his megaphone before the returned fire hit the cannon, exploding violently. Amy landed without a sound on the sap-covered grass, flipping her hair.

"That was badass, Big Sis!" Grace exclaimed.

"That was nothing," the kilo-woman waved off with a smirk. "Now who's blowing our bubble?"

"Franky's on it," Merry answered, her words lining up with the expansion of the sap below them. "You know, you'd think there would be more marines here by now."

"Maybe something held them up?" Zoro shrugged, the ship sinking as, above them, a giant green-and-red bird swooped low, cutting the sails of the Marine ships as if deliberately. Chopper paused Sanji's first aid to wave.

"Stop them!" Rear Admiral Wallace yelled to no avail. "Force those fiends to falter!"

"Alright everyone," Luffy began, the bubble stabilizing around the ship as he jumped to the second-floor railing and Franky climbed over the side. "I know I don't have much time for this, but I need to say something. It's been two years since we've all been together and we're all different now, but that hasn't changed anything. This is our second half! This is our journey! Everyone, let's set sail! For the New World!"

With his words echoing over the waves, the Thousand Sunny sank below the ocean.

The Straw Hats had gotten away once more, but the most dangerous part of their adventure had only just begun.

End of Chapter 3

There you have it folks, the end of the reunion! The crew is full and reunited once more! How will the Marines react to this? What adventures await them at the bottom of the sea? What will become of my joke one-shot Self Insert that has slowly become a reoccurring character? Find the answers to some of these questions next time on Coby's Choice: New World, New Choices!

*Please note: In the original chapter of her introduction (Episode of Grace), I referred to Mary Rokuma (the bee woman) as Ms. Saturday. This was an error on my part, and several kind reviewers tried to correct me. I had either found faulty information or had misread said information, convincing myself that Mothersday was wrong. At some point, I will rectify this in the original.

If this chapter seemed kind of choppy and all-over-the-place, there was a lot happening at the same time and I wanted everything in near-chronological order. Future chapters will be (hopefully) less broken up but (also hopefully) just as chaotic. And, as always-

Read and Review!

-SwordOfTheGods