An entire fortnight passed by in that same, depressing fashion.

He prepared his own meals. He diligently performed all of the original goods's clan duties. He exhausted himself daily to keep this body in tip-top condition. He and his instant family mutually avoided the other. His insomnia and migraine persisted, with what little of sleep he could get be accompanied by night terrors made from Tajima's traumatic memories. And panic attacks became the norm behind the safety of his bedroom doors when the acting and dysphoria became all too much to bear.

Humans were social animals. If gone without social interaction and emotional intimacy for long periods, it was scientifically proven to be detrimental to a person's mental health, and this proved also true for Kai, who was a misanthrope with anxiety issues.

Unfortunately, as Uchiha Tajima, showing emotions and bearing one's soul meant social and political suicide. Thus, he trusted no one with his secrets, no one with his thoughts, and no one with his weaknesses; which only brought forth a deep mental fatigue, severe insomnia, and many breakdowns.

The only social interactions he has had all fortnight were from manning the mission office, and that was more harmful to a person with deep social anxiety than self-isolation could ever do to them. If not for Maou being his (unwilling) therapy animal, he would have long succumbed to those self-harming thoughts.

At the end of the day, if he could rate being transmigrated into Narutoverse during the Warring States Era as Tajima, it would be 1 out of 10 stars. Would not recommend to the faint of heart. The obligations that came with being Uchiha Tajima were not worth having heaven-defying super-powered eyes.

Sighing, Kai pinched the bridge of his nose, praying to Jashin that this budding headache would not turn into a migraine. The day had only just begun and he was already mentally fatigued from the never-ending pile of paperwork on his desk. Moreso when his (now deemed his and not Tajima's) aide-cum-office clerk dropped a thick folder on his desk.

Withholding a groan, Kai, in a detached manner, picked it up and flipped through the investigation reports he had previously tasked the man with. Kaen's presence in his office was left forgotten in the process of deciphering the words within the folder.

The reports were detailed, militaresque, and coded, which was expected considering the original goods's occupation. If he had transmigrated sans those wretched memories, he would have been utterly lost at the terminology used by these shinobis.

Kai felt disconnected from reality as he skimmed through the thick reports. Kaen, rather than simply doing what was told, went the extra mile and dug into the concubine's childhood history, past relationships, and the people her family and friends interacted with even in the passing. How Kaen had gotten so much intimate knowledge and information without the existence of satellites, CCTV, and social media… Kai did not want to know (probably with genjutsu and torture and nope).

As he closed the folder, Kai could not help pressing the heels of his palms into his eyes. Jashin had ignored his prayers yet again; the headache had turned into a full-blown migraine.

From what he understood, in conclusion: it was evident that the original goods had been too arrogant for his own good.

Tajima was a shinobi, yet he did not perform even a courtesy background check on his civilian concubine before marriage, who turned out to be a cousin of his eldest brother's wife. For the idiot to think that it was natural for ladies to flock to him due to his status in the clan was so dumb on so many levels it was not even funny. He even judged civilians to be harmless. If that was not considered digging one's own grave, Kai would eat his own foot.

The Uchiha Tajima from his memories was a paranoid individual who did not trust his siblings as they were raised to be rivals for the throne rather than family members. For such a person to disregard a potential danger… left Kai speechless. The original goods truly was an inconsistent, pig-like teammate Kai has to clean up after just to be able to eat chicken.

Did Tajima miss his 100mg daily dose of crazy-paranoid before he married the concubine? What even was this discrepancy? This gap was not moe at all. Kishimoto-sama, was this one of your plot holes? Character personality holes? For Jashin's sake…

"Tajima-sama?" Kaen's worried call brought him out of his glum.

Aiya! He forgot he was not alone. Outside his bedroom, he must not show weakness. Poker face poker face. Tajimask Tajimask.

Discreetly, Kai took a deep breath to calm himself and dropped his hands, turning indifferent eyes to his assistant. "Hn?" he grunted in a show of aloofness.

Kaen appeared sympathetic as he said, "It's normal to feel upset over a betrayal, Tajima-sama, especially if it was by a family member."

Family member? Betrayal? Upset? Who?

No, no, no. When did he ever feel betrayed? He was only trying to press the migraine down! And even if Kai did, Tajima would never. The original goods would be angered to death, sure. But to feel upset over some girl he married yet could not even remember the name of? That would be too humane of him. Tajima was a coldhearted bastard through and through.

The only person the original goods would ever call a family member was the current patriarch of the Uchiha clan who was also his father, Uchiha Sandayu. What about his siblings, niblings, cousins, or any other sort of relatives, you ask? Heh, no. If given the opportunity and authority to do so, Tajima would have scratched their names off of the family tree with a rusted spoon! The man was an unfeeling psychopath. He did not even think of Madara and Izuna as individuals, only an extension of himself, someone to push him further up the pedestal.

Kai debated with himself for a while before finally responding, "I appreciate the sentiment." He truly did. However, there was no way he could genuinely express that for fear of OOC-ness. If it were Tajima, the man would take offense in Kaen worrying about his emotional state. Hence, he forced his lips to curl into a sneer as he continued stoically, "Though I would appreciate it, even more, should you mind your own business and keep such pathetic thoughts to yourself."

The corner of Kaen's eyes tightened, probably at his rudeness, before his features smoothened into his usual genteel one. "Of course, Tajima-sama. I apologize for overstepping. Would you like me to continue digging for substantial evidence of their collaboration and attempt at murder via poison?"

Kai linked his fingers together and rested his chin upon them in the standard anime thinking pose. He contemplated his options. Did he want to invite more trouble to his doorsteps?

There were three options he could choose from.

Option number one was to become an ostrich with its head in the sand. Option number two was to gather a substantial sum of evidence and release them into the grapevines. Or option number three, which was to use said proof when he needed it.

Option number one, whilst tempting, would just make him an easier target. A problem of this magnitude (where unwitnessed murder was fair game) would not disappear just because he tried running away from it. Rather than absolve him of his title and let him be an ordinary member of the clan, ignorance was not bliss - it merely meant a swifter death. He could turn into a pawn, tool, or scapegoat to one of his fellow imperial harem members at any time if he were to choose this option.

Option number two, whilst it would satisfy his Chinese blood for vengeance, there was a saying back home: before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves. This would incur the highest level of enmity from the original goods's eldest brother, as the latter would be stripped of his title and removed from the imperial harem, thus bringing shame to his family and reputation. The genre would then change from historical imperial-themed to dog-blood revenge-themed within the snap of a finger. And that would be very bad. A person who has lost everything and has nothing more to lose was more worrying than a fellow concubine in a power struggle for the emperor's affection. If he were to choose this option, Kai would have to be prepared to sleep with both eyes open whilst thoroughly ridding the clan of the eldest brother and his faction.

Option number three. Blackmail. Nice and simple. It would bring more pros than cons. Kai was not the stereotypical Japanese isekai protagonist. He was not polite enough to choose the option of 'letting it go' and be 'non-confrontational' like many of those slice-of-life Japanese MCs. Rather, he was living in a cliché historical concubines fighting each other to gain the emperor's favor via political schemes and poison kind of genre, not slice-of-life… or even action-themed, which was supposed to be the original genre of this world.

But he digressed.

"Continue discreetly, and prioritize the investigation," Kai ended up saying after the long moment he spent weighing his options.

It was a shame to grant temporary leave to his office clerk when he truly needed a helping hand with all this paperwork, but he had to prioritize and allocate manpower where it was needed. Since Kai only has Kaen on his side (the entirety of Tajima's faction was made up of greedy two-faced snakes), there was not much he could do. He was not looking forward to tomorrow's workload.

"By your command." Kaen bowed, and when he straightened, there was a bloodthirstiness about him that felt out of place from the usual genteel man. When Kai blinked, it was gone, and he had to wonder if he had imagined all that. Kaen was, after all, a cripple. What harm could a disabled person do in a clan full of able-bodied shinobi? "Please look forward to my results, Tajima-sama. This one will leave no stone unturned."

"As you should," Kai harrumphed, trying for arrogance but it came off dead and flat instead. He was just so exhausted from acting all the time. "What of the- my... concubine?"

"She is under twenty-four-hour guard by those I trust explicitly with my life. By Amaterasu, I promise no harm will come to Tajima-sama's unborn child. We've restrained her enough she could only blink her eyes."

… That was not what he had asked, but the mental image of Tajima's heavily pregnant concubine strapped into a straightjacket and restrained akin to Hannibal Lector in prison almost made him call the Human Rights Commission. Once again, Kai was reminded of how cruel and barbaric this world was.

"When is she due?"

"The midwife estimated sometime this month."

Kai's finger twitched as the migraine behind his eyes pulsed harder at the unfortunate news. No, he did not want yet another instant child to care of that fast. He has not even made a single progress with Madara and Izuna, what of this unborn kid? Why was he, an asexual misanthrope, a father of not one, not two, but three tiny humans? Ah, kill him now. Should he pray to Jashin-sama for a miscarriage? No no no, Tajima was the human scum, not Kai. Besides, it was not as if he would personally have to look after the baby; Tajima's wife could do that. Kai just has to be responsible for… uh, the child's training. Yeah.

(Kai was such a hypocrite, no better than the original goods.)

"Hn. If there is nothing else, leave, I have work to do."

"Of course. Do call me whenever you need anything, for I am at your disposal." With one last final bow, Kaen exited the office, the thud thud thud of his cane against the wooden floorboards growing softer with his departure.

Rather than continue working as he insinuated he would, Kai hopped onto his feet and stretched towards the ceiling, groaning when his back popped satisfyingly. It was high time he took a break. And maybe get some animal therapy.

Maou should be near the pond, sunbathing whilst eyeballing the koi fishes right now. That kitten, from what he had observed over the fortnight, had a schedule that it adhered strictly to, and would be hissy if its routine was interrupted, akin to someone diagnosed with OCD.

It was hilarious (and healing) the way Maou reacted whenever Kai broke its daily routine. Kai was probably a menace and a bully in its eyes, but how could he resist teasing the kitten when it always looked at him as if he was a piece of chewed bubblegum stuck on the pads of its paws? Irresistibly cute.

Only fellow shit-scoopers could understand his sadistic desire to torment his pet kitten in the most innocent yet aggravating way possible. Getting kitty-punched or scratched in retaliation was the norm, as evidenced by the shallow red lines on his forearms and fingers. Maou would truly become its namesake when it grew older, but for now, its scratches were very cute and ticklish.

Oddly enough, Maou was not photosynthesizing near the pond like usual when Kai peeked out the veranda. Due to how tiny the kitten's chakra signature was (and no, it was not because Kai was abysmal with sensing shut up), he had a hard time tracking his wayward pet.

For a second, he assumed the worst; which was Maou having been cat-napped by one of the original goods's dastardly brothers. Fortunately, that was not the case when he peeked into the shed at the back of the mansion, the last place he thought to search.

Kai felt relief at first at the sight of his fur baby, before he realized he would not be able to torment– ahem, get his daily dose of animal therapy today since it was in the arms of his youngest instant son, Uchiha Izuna.

The toddler was playing with Maou using a handmade cat toy which was a blunted kunai that was tied to a stick with a string. Whilst Kai was glad that the weapon was blunt, he worried he would need to have a chat with his instant sons about weapon management… A shinobi needed to be prepared lest they die a pitiful death.

Izuna was trying his hardest to stifle a giggle as he watched the silly kitty clumsily run after his deliberately blunted training kunai with the grace of an uncoordinated baby giraffe. A second later, he could not hold in his peals of laughter any longer when the kitty tripped and fell face-first onto the stone floor.

"Silly Maou-tan is silly!" Izuna giggled whilst poking the silly kitty in the tummy. "And fat! Maou-tan needs to exewcise mowe."

It growled loudly as if aggrieved by the toddler's words, yet it made no move to leave or retaliate even when Izuna began kneading its chubby tummy with his own equally pudgy hands.

"Un, Izu isn't mean. Izu won't call Maou-tan fat anymowe… if Maou-tan plays wif Izu mowe," Izuna tried to appeal to the kitty, who was squinting at him as if it did not trust his words.

Izuna pouted. "Maou-tan don't be mean. Izu no tell lies. Madamada is the one who lies all the time!"

The silly kitty gave him a look. Izuna did not know how to describe such a look, but it was akin to the look Kaen-ojisan sometimes gave father. Was it dry amusement? Indulgent? Pamper? Something along those lines… but Izuna was too young to understand it properly. The uncertainty only made him grumpy.

"No!" Izuna harrumphed, unhappy by the look he was given. "Madamada weally lies a lot! He always gives Izu buwnt fwied wice sayin it's yummy but it nasty! Yuck yuck yuck!"

Maou tilted its head. Izuna nodded confidently as if he was able to communicate with the kitty. "Un. Kaen-ojisan made Iida-san leave. Izu doesn't know why. Madamada no like her so he doesn't cawe. But now we don't have a cook anymowe! Izu doesn't know who is making ouw meals now but Izu doesn't like fwied wice anymowe!"

The kitty's eyes were upturned as if it was laughing at an inside joke that only it knows. Izuna pouted harder, lips jutted and cheeks puffed out to the extreme. Even his hair was bristling. "Maou-tan is mean! Maou-tan always laughs at Izu. Izu won't pwotect Maou-tan fwom Madamada anymowe! Let Madamada pull Maou-tan's tail latew, see if Izu cawes!"

This time, Maou meowed and growled in response, paw batting away at Izuna's hands that were still kneading its belly like dough. Before Izuna could start his crocodile waterworks to freak the kitty, a shadow fell over his seated form, which pulled his attention away from the kitty and he looked over his shoulder in curiosity. Maybe big brother has finished his lessons faster today?

Alas, it was not who he had thought it to be.

Standing there, half obstructed by the door with the sun at his back, was his father. Even though the man's features were semi-shadowed, it did nothing to reduce the intimidating factor. Izuna blanched at the sight. His father, whose face was ice-cold with equally frosty eyes, looked indifferently at him.

Shinigami. That was the image Izuna had of his father. Ruthless and cruel.

Izuna leaped to his feet and quickly performed an elegant bow that had been drilled into his body since he could remember. "C-Chichi-ue!" Oh no! Immediately, he wanted to bite his inner cheek for daring to stutter. Father hated it when he stuttered, and a phantom pain shot across his cheeks at the memory of his previous punishments.

Izuna was prepared for it, his shoulders hunched and muscles pulled tautly. But the punishment never came, even after a long moment, much to his bewilderment. He cautiously peeked at his father, expecting the worst when eye contact was made. But father only continued to stare down at him emotionlessly, his onyx eyes soulless and bottomless, causing a shudder to run down his back.

(On a subconscious level, Uchiha Izuna felt only fear and avoidance whenever he was with Uchiha Tajima. There was no respect, no admiration, and no idolization present, vastly different from other children who grow up in a safe environment, treasured and loved by their parents. And whereas Izuna was too young to feel hate, the potential was there; the seed of hatred has been planted, and it was only due to his young age that Izuna continued to long for parental love and approval, thus preventing the seed from blooming too quickly. However, with how much his father watered that seed in his heart with sewage and biohazard waste, it would no doubt bloom into an ugly, odorous flower akin to a rafflesia. Uchiha Madara once lost his brother to that foul, rotten flower that had rooted itself deeply inside Izuna's heart. But what if a filter was attached to the watering can and filtered out all the impurities? Could the seed then bloom into a beautiful flower, a gerbera, perhaps? Only time would tell, as it was far too early to judge.)

But, at least, father's eyes were not spinning red. Izuna preferred a more physical punishment than having his nightmares turned into reality. Father was good at that; inflicting fear and mental torment. Bruises and cuts heal would within the week, but genjutsu damage lasted longer than two-year-old Izuna could count.

"What are you doing here?" Father spoke, terse.

Izuna translated his father's words to how dare you come here and skip training, just to play with the cat. I'm disappointed.

"Uhm, uh…" Izuna felt his eyes heat up, which was not a good sign. He swallowed and bit his lower lip, unwilling to shed any tears in fear of angering his father more. Father hated it more when he cried.

"What?" Father frowned. "Are you having trouble vocalizing?"

His brain automatically translated it to: don't anger me further. Speak, use words and answer my question!

"I'm so– uhm, my apologies, chichi-ue. Izu ish– uhm, I am on my bweak… bweahku… bvueak… uhm, uuu…" Izuna's heated eyes were darting this and that way as he stumbled on his words. Try as he might, he struggled with enunciation, his tongue simply too immature to properly form the right sounds for certain alphabets.

Don't cry don't cry don't cry, Izuna told himself, his heart beating a mile a minute. His fingers were clenching the sleeves of his garments in a death grip, his cheeks flushed and eyes watery. Don't cry don't cry don't cry. Cold sweat was beading on his forehead, and he could not quite control the terror from showing in his eyes.

Izuna could feel his breathing turn shallow, muscles trembling as he unconsciously hunched onto himself, head ducked low. If he could curl into a small ball, he would. But father hated it when he showed weakness. He needed to stand up straight. Stand up straight, Izu! But his body refused to cooperate.

From the corner of his eyes, he saw father take a step forward, a hand extending towards him. Terrified and intimidated, he clenched his eyes shut, muscles pulled taut as he waited with bated breath for the inevitable blow.

However, rather than the expected blow, something heavy fell on his head. It radiated a calming heat, which boggled Izuna enough for him to raise his head and peek through his curtain of hair.

"Eh?" The words slipped out before he could stop it, and the heat –a hand, his father's hand– retreated, much to his disappointment(?), which alarmed him. He feared his father's touch, so why did he miss the –monstrous, painful– hand that had just been on his head? Izuna just did not understand the way his heartbeat was in a different rhythm that should have been full of apprehension and fear.

Kai resisted the urge to thoroughly sanitize his hands for daring to pat a tiny human on its head. The reason for his mindless action was simple; his instant son had looked like a spooked hamster. When his mind conjured said animal's ears on the toddler at the thought, Kai could not hold out against the urge to calm the tiny animal down.

When he came to, he was already caressing the soft tuft of hair, which almost made his inner misanthrope (merged with Tajima) react violently. Fortunately for the both of them, he withheld such instincts and removed his wayward appendage from the toddler's head in a swift manner.

Maou was seated next to Izuna's feet, staring up at him as if he was an alien incarnate. Kai wanted to hide his face in its fur as he felt how warm his cheeks were slowly growing. Damn it, how embarrassing ah!

Rather than suffocate himself via cat fur, he swiftly turned on his heels to hide his loss of composure whilst speaking tersely, "It is almost time for lunch." The least Kai could do for his youngest instant son after spooking him so badly was to cook a meal for him (and maybe prove that his fried rice has, indeed, gotten better. Yes, he had overheard that rude remark, damn brat!).

Assuming that his instant son would be obediently toddling after him, Kai strode confidently towards the shed's doors. Already halfway out, he only paused when Maou meowed loudly in an attention-grabbing way.

Without bodily turning, he looked over his shoulder. There, on the wooden floorboards with his legs in a W position, was Izuna. The toddler's whole body was trembling uncontrollably. Forget walking, it would be a miracle if he could stand on his own.

Post-adrenaline crash, perhaps? That had happened to Kai numerous times after an exciting round of hacking into hush-hush databases.

He weighed his options.

After a minute or two of staring at the trembling hamst– toddler, Kai sighed. It made his instant son flinch, but he ignored that and moved into a crouch. Unaware that his eyebrows had furrowed harder whilst he held in his dislike at their close proximity, Kai retrieved a pair of leather gloves he had previously found in his bedroom from his pocket and donned them.

Now that there was a barrier between their skins, Kai felt more comfortable with the idea of carrying a tiny human. Thankfully, Izuna had a cute appearance. If not, Kai would not even consider touching him.

Grabbing the toddler by the armpits, he lifted Izuna whilst standing to his full height. As Kai mentally prepared himself to bring Izuna flush against his side, the latter had his mouth wide opened into an O shape, doe-eyed. Not that Kai was aware. No, he was busy hyping himself.

Izuna continued to dangle in the air for another five minutes, unmoving, before Kai mustered the courage to balance his instant son on a hip. When the toddler instinctively latched one pudgy fist on his chest and the other on his shoulder, Kai was not prepared for it and flinched, horribly.

Kai had assumed that Izuna would be dead weight as he was manhandled – like carrying an inanimate bag of potatoes, but oh boy he was wrong. A tiny human was still a human. He could feel his arms breaking out in hives underneath his garment.

The tension, which had previously abated, increased tenfold between the pair of father and son.

"Uhm, chichi-ue, Izu– I can walk," Izuna spoke in a barely-there whisper. His voice, which was full of tremors, contrasted greatly with the way his grip tightened as if he did not truly want to be set down.

Kai understood. He really did under these circumstances. In DV cases, the victims would latch desperately onto any semblance of affection freely given by their abuser, even if they knew deep down that it was temporary and toxic. However, even though he understood, Kai wanted nothing more than to ignore the tells and do as the toddler said; to set him down and let him walk on his own.

Kai almost did exactly that, but the rational part of his brain overrode his emotional side. It said; think about it… did Kai not previously thought of ways to close the gap between him and his instant sons? Furthermore, skinship has always been the fastest way to create a trustful bond.

Kai could do this. He could carry Izuna to the kitchen. It was only five minutes away if he brisk walked.

"No need," Kai responded crisply. Fortunately, the strain in his voice went over Izuna's young head.

The toddler merely nodded and made himself comfortable in Kai's arms. Stiffly, he brisk walked as fast as he could with Maou dogging at his heels, which slowed him down considerably lest he tripped over the furry nuisance. This better be worth it, he snide inwards at his rationale side as he deliberately ignored the way his heart beat loudly in his chest with an emotion he did not want to acknowledge.

(In the future, Kai would look back at this moment with great fondness and exasperation.)

A/N:

Character Status

Name: Liu Kai / Uchiha Tajima

Age: 35 / 20

Race: Chinese / Japanese

Circumstances: Transmigrated person currently in Narutoverse Warring States Era.

Goals: 1) Become the Uchiha Patriarch. 2) Prepare evidence to blackmail the mastermind behind that incident. 3) Complete exposure therapy. 4) Practice cooking. 5) Form a bond with his instant sons.

State of mind: Discomforted

Standing within the clan: Prestigious

Standing within the household: Precarious ++

Standing within the main branch: Pugnacious

Latest outstanding accomplishment: Overheard Izuna hating on his friend rice

Inner complains: "And I could've gotten away too if it weren't for those meddling kids and that cat of theirs!"