Disclaimer: First Chapter
Story Start!

"Hey brat!"

"GAH!? You bastard, what the hell was that for... what is this?" Naruto asked as he caught a piece of paper with a drawing on it. He raised an eyebrow, because it was a crappy drawing that Jiraiya had drawn.

After dinner was the worst time for this.

He should be training on how to cheat, and then just training with splitting rocks, and maybe a couple more hours of taijutsu practice. Instead he had the pervert bothering him with some crude drawing of a monster.

"I sensed something dark in the city, and when I checked it out, I found a monster with a female upper half... and a freaky lower half. Use your training to track the monster down and kill it, it's eaten several people, and it will attack somebody else in 2 days. I've noticed a pattern of when it kills and eats." Jiraiya just stated a mission objective to Naruto.

He could easily taken care of this himself.

He also knew that Naruto could fight the monster easily enough, which was why he was going to make it more of a challenge by not telling Naruto where the monster was located at.

"Okay-"

"No Rasengan, no Explosive Tags, nothing that can cause damage to your surroundings. These are the handicaps for this mission." Jiraiya gave several rules to Naruto that needed to be obeyed, to test Naruto's growth in his creativity when fighting. "If you don't agree, I'll go take out this monster myself... unless you don't think you can do it." Jiraiya ruffled Naruto's hair as he noticed the teen had gone silent.

Naruto was staring at the drawing.

"... I'm fine with the rules... but what the hell is with this drawing, even if I find the monster, there is no way that I'm going to know... your drawings suck." Naruto just shat on Jiraiya's drawing right then and there, no hesitation, and the worst part was that Jiraiya could tell Naruto was being completely serious. He was fine with the handicaps, but he didn't know if he would be able to find the monster using the drawing as a reference. "No seriously, what if I end up fighting some innocent ugly monster, and not this ugly monster?"

"Are you an idiot?"

"Yes."

"I am pretty damn sure that you are allowed to kill whatever ugly monsters you find... this one has the upper body of a stacked woman, and the lower body of a giant freak animal. Just for that insult, no Ninjutsu... AT ALL during the entire fight." Jiraiya stated as he slapped the back of Naruto's head. he would have been okay with Naruto at least using Shadow Clones since they were an important part of his fighting style, but after that hurtful comment, he wasn't even going to allow those to be used. "Also, this monster eats people, why aren't you more surprised by that... that there are human eating monsters in this world?" Jiraiya asked with a deadpan tone.

"I mean, it's not surprising that something that is a monster, would be so trashy that it eats people... and it's going to die for it. This seems like good training, you want me to bring back proof I killed it?" Naruto stood up and stretched his body, going through some slight warm ups. "I can use ninjutsu to find this monster right?"

"Right, just not to find it."

"Awesome."

-Several Hours Later-

"Okay, this seems to be the house Boss." Naruto's Shadow Clone stated as he pointed to a very large house that looked to be abandoned. The Shadow Clone vanished with a pop, allowing Naruto to ready himself up for the monster within. The rest of his clones popped as well, and for some reason he got flashes of all of their memories. He was starting to get used to the idea that he was getting his clone's memories.

It was coming in handy for sure.

"Something smells... delicious..."

"Wow... that is nightmare fuel..." Naruto deadpanned as jumped when a spear pierced the door, and a large paw tried to break out through it to grab him. He saw in the window the upper half of a naked woman with wild hair and a crazed look to her eye. Her regular human arms were each holding spears, which seemed to be made of bones or something.

"See, the drawing as accurate."

"CRAP, you scared me..." Naruto covered his chest at the shock of Jiraiya appearing next to him, dropping out of the sky. He had expected the spear to come rushing through the door, but Jiraiya had just been a total dick when he did that. "... So I just have to fight this giant woman, and the mission is complete?" Naruto asked as he pointed to the woman.

He entered the house through the broken front door.

It smelled like death.

"No Ninjutsu or Explosive Tags allowed."

"Got it." Naruto took his headband out of his pocket, with a kunai that he put between his lips. He started to dodge stabs from the spears as he tied his band around his forehead. He landed on top of the spear that struck closest to him, and kicked the woman in the wrist. With his forehead covered by the metal protector, Naruto took the kunai from his lips.

*Booooof*

His other hand instantly tossed a smoke bomb onto the ground, covering the entire inner of the house with smoke, stopping anyone from seeing anything. a spear strike still came close to Naruto, since it seemed that her sense of smell statement earlier wasn't just for show.

"No Ninjutsu, even under smoke to hide them!"

"I KNOW already, the smoke is to hide the fact..." Naruto was about to give his plan away, and he had already given his location away when Jiraiya shouted out that reminder of the rules. Throwing his hands up in the air in frustration when he realized that his stealth was ruined by his pervy teacher, and the smoke was already clearing away enough that his enemy could see him again.

"You have such a tasty smell, it's getting me wet."

"Gross." Naruto AND Jiraiya stated.

"Still, no ninjutsu." Jiraiya reminded Naruto with a grin slowly working away onto his face.

"I KNOW already!" Naruto shouted in frustration as he tossed his hands up into the air, and he pulled a scroll out of his pocket. He unrolled it in front of him, and summoned a Fuma Shuriken, holding the large weapon with one hand. Fuinjutsu wasn't Ninjutsu, so it didn't break the rules of the mission to use his scroll to take out one of his tools.

"What is-"

Naruto threw the Fuma Shuriken, and it went flying towards the demonic beast so fast she barely dodged it. Her statement had been cut off the second he had thrown it, and before she could open her mouth again, a second Fuma Shuriken cut the top of her head off. She wasn't even decapitated, his weapon sliced through her forehead and cut through her brain like paper.

"There, she's dead, the mission is over, and I didn't use Ninjutsu or Explosive tags, happy!" Naruto pointed to the corpse of the demon that fell to the side, crushing furnature underneath her. He walked towards the wall and walked straight up it, as he went to collect his weapons as they stuck into the ceiling. One was covered in blood and one was not, but he put both of them back into his scroll. "... lost my cool there."

"You're not very cool."

"Shut up." Naruto snapped at him with red cheeks, his temper having gotten in the way of his plan. Jiraiya knew just what buttons to push in order to get him to just snap at somebody. "What the hell is this thing anyway?" Naruto changed the subject, coughing into his hand to avert attention from his blush.

Jiraiya walked forward and looked at the corpse.

"Don't know, but... what is that sound?" Jiraiya asked as he noticed some kind of alarm was going off. "... oh, that is neat, look at that fire alarm. Your smoke bomb must have set it off." Jiraiya took a shuriken and tossed it right at the alarm, and stabbed it to end the sound the thing was making.

"Alarm."

"... You don't think?"

"I do."

"We might want to grab the body and make a run for it, before anyone arrives." Naruto and Jiraiya looked down at the large woman's corpse. Jiraiya took out some paper bombs, and began to place them all around the house.

"I'll grab one arm, you grab the other."

-The Next Day-

"Did you hear about that massive gas leak that destroyed the big house over by the station?"

'I'm exhausted, I should have gotten more sleep.' Naruto yawned into his hand, hearing whatever rumors that the students at the school were talking about now. He didn't pay too much attention to it though.

His forehead hit the desk.

He hated school, he just wanted to sleep.

'Pervy Sage kept waking me up whenever I was going to sleep too... he's got some kind of plan up his sleeve.' Naruto thought as he yawned again, trying his best to stay awake. He didn't know what was going on with Pervy Sage and his weird plans, but he wasn't going to just let the pervert win.

He was going to stay awake.

He was sure the pervert wanted him to fall asleep at school.

He would not play into Jiraiya's hands!

Chapter End!
Please Leave Me Lots of Nice Long Reviews, But No Flames Please!

I wonder if anyone can figure out what Jiraiya has planned.