A not-so-training arc filled with love for edgy Bloodborne-ish trick weapons! Hope you enjoy it!
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Child in Abusive Training
Two weeks from the Fuyuki Disaster
Kirei has found an answer. A child born of accursed taint has claimed the holy seat of a Saint.
He would have shouted out loud for all the world to hear and danced in a frenzy if only it didn't result in Shirou reconsidering his life choices as his adoptive son. Oh, he definitely couldn't forgive that.
Three days. The boy had managed to overthrow his expectations in no more than just three days. Kirei was ecstatic.
That was two weeks ago. Even right now, the boy provided a great source of entertainment. He was indeed a lucky father.
With a jolly hum, he mixed the Mabo-tofu with his spoon while sprinkling in crimson-black powder with his three fingers like a professional chef. This was his special homemade blend of spices he used in this delicacy, and he was sure that his son would love it. He would make sure he did.
The 'gift' of Gilgamesh was now wrapped in the red shroud of Saint Martin. Part of it was because that the noble phantasm excluded an aura of divinity so strong it would alert any magus in a 500m radius by simply existing. Shirou had touched it once out of sheer curiosity and the advice of his new servant, only to withdraw from it as if he touched fire.
It didn't seem like he was hurt in any way, no, quite the contrary, in fact. Kirei could feel the holy air cling onto Shirou like a blanket ever since. Despite the constant nagging from his servant, however, the stubborn boy adamantly refused to so much as touch it, even with the shroud. Kirei was secretly looking forward to the moment when Shirou would cave in.
The boy's naiveness always gave the man a rush of euphoria. How cute was he to believe he still had a chance at living a life without bloodshed? Change required power in this cruel world after all, in one way or another.
"Father? Is that you? I said that I would make breakfast."
"Ah, here he cometh, our Saint and Saviour, born of evil! ...And his pet lizard."
Shirou scowled at his father's words. The black knight materialized her sword.
"I'm not in the mood for this, Kirei. Neither is Artoria."
The man chuckled. He waved off the glares of his son (and the subtle killing intent from his overprotective dragon) with relative ease and pointed at the table with his chin.
"Sit down. I shall serve breakfast. You do look awfully tired from your 'exercise'."
"Exercise!? You call that...no matter. I'm happy that you get your kicks from watching me suffer, father."
Shirou's training had started the next day he arrived at his new home, and it escalated once Kirei found out that Shirou's body was even more special than he originally thought. Shirou was, to put it simply, a Servant in flesh. Or to be precise, he was 'growing' into one.
Yes, that was the most appropriate way of phrasing his body. Not morphing, nor transforming, but 'growing'. The more intense the training was, the more his body would try to adapt in order to keep up with its master's demands.
While both Gilgamesh foretold and Artoria grudgingly admitted that Shirou would never have the physique of a top heroic spirit no matter how he tortured himself, they did predict he would be around the level of an average assassin class Servant around the age of sixteen if he trained hard enough.
Emphasis on 'hard enough'. When the greatest heroes humanity has got to offer, say 'hard', it meant hell. Shirou could attest to that. He's been to hell and back, he was practically born in hell for heaven's sake, yet he still felt that it was hell. Scratch that, it was plain purgatory. The irony was not lost on him.
From day to night, his servant (Kirei had explained in detail about the Holy Grail War and the world of magus, so he now knew the significance of that word as well as how befitting it was in his case) 'trained' him to be, quote; 'A King who is worthy as the rightful overlord of Pendragon'.
One night, Shirou had asked his servant about her contract with the Grail, curious about why she insisted he should be a King. She replied, saying in a matter-of-fact way that she wished for the eternal prosperity of Britain, and since she was the queen and he, her master, then by law, he should be the king. It was a matter of pride and honor for the heiress of Pendragon, and she wasn't taking no for an answer.
Shirou had then asked her how she would achieve her Britain if it was long gone. Surely she didn't mean rewinding time or altering history. She just smiled mysteriously, saying that she has already achieved that goal.
'Where I, the Pendragon am, there is Britain. The Dragons are two, therefore, prosperity is promised.'
Artoria didn't care to elaborate after that, only stating that he would understand once he matured. Shirou was left with more questions than he began with.
Thus, started his training as the king. He royally sucked at it. It wasn't that he was incapable per se, but more like his tutor's hopes were sky-high.
Every day, his bones would shatter all over his body until he felt like he was literally made out of glass. So utterly inhumane it was, Shirou was almost tempted to use the damn spear of that Saint at his daily sparrings with Artoria, even if just to alleviate the humiliation of the gruesome one-sided knockdown which he was on the receiving end of.
Shirou shook his head to push away the nightmarish thoughts. Kirei grinned widely, happy that Shirou had some trauma. After all, it was his job to guide lost sheep.
The priest set down a giant steel bowl of steaming stew onto the dining table. It was crimson, with cubes of white poking out from under the surface. Shirou saw Gilgamesh appear in the hallway, only to take a sharp turn when she saw the contents on the table, her mouth twisting in disgust.
Shirou motioned with his finger. His royal knight sprang into action, caught the Queen by the arm, and started dragging her into the room as a jailer does to a prisoner. Shirou opened his mouth before the Queen opened her Gates of Babylon.
"Surely, the most glorious Queen is not afraid of a little challenge brought by a child? A challenge, to prove her royal courage against this...food of fire?"
Gilgamesh clicked her tongue.
The master and servant smiled at each other in triumph. This was indeed a moment of satisfaction unlike any other. Judging from the way Kirei's eyes shone, he seemed to agree as well.
A few hours after breakfast, in the cellar
"I have something I want to give you."
It seemed like Kirei had a present to compensate for all of the lost years in Shirou's life, as well as his 'birthday' as his son. He had called Shirou out for a 'one-on-one talk between father and son' as he put it. Although Shirou didn't believe in his father's newfound sentimentality in the slightest, he agreed, leaving his servant by the door in case of emergencies.
Kirei didn't seem to mind this at all, as he pulled a leather suitcase from a wooden box sent from Italy while humming to himself. He raised the incantation-engraved suitcase with a grunt and placed it on the stone table with a loud thud. He patted it proudly.
"This, is my gift to you. A present I begged for two weeks, one wrapped and transported by the headquarters of Vatican. Open it."
Seeing no apparent reason not to, Shirou cautiously flicked open the golden locks of the black suitcase and slowly opened the lid. He gasped.
On top of the velvet cushions, there lay two of the most beautiful weapons the boy has ever seen. Two enormous handguns, one was snow white with a small black safety switch on the side, while the other was pitch black with a safety switch of the opposite color. An embodiment of Ying and Yang.
Kirei nodded, apparently pleased that Shirou has taken an immediate liking to his gift.
"The one that boasts a silver-white coat is the 24.8×89mm round hand cannon 'Stigmata', and its stygian black counterpart is the 18.8×100mm round hand rifle 'Crucifixio'. Both up to a length of 45cm with a ridiculous weight of 28kg, they were created for the sole purpose of being the rightful successor to old anti-vampire weaponry such as black keys, and they were specifically designed to hunt down high-ranking Dead Apostles under the level of Ancestors."
Kirei stood by Shirou's side, watching the boy who was marveling over the weapons with stars in his eyes. The man continued his lecture.
"These twin 'pistols' fires a massive, armor-piercing hollow point bullet, its rounds jacketed by a casing of blessed Macedonian silver and features an explosive tip containing a charge of blessed mercury. However, the round's absurd size limits the twin gun's magazine capacity to only seven rounds.
The physical prowess of a single shot, multiplied by the charms of the Holy Church, was more than enough to completely penetrate the armor of an M1 Abrams (the main battle tank of the US military) from head to tail, not to mention the effectiveness of the bullet itself was all but lethal for the undead, even for vampires who boast great regeneration."
Kirei paused, pointing at a certain part of the gun grasped in Shirou's hand.
"Now, move the switch on the side. Yes, that one. You can move both of them."
The slides of the guns retreated, only to reveal the hidden blades that were the size of a shortsword. Shirou ogled at the trick weapon of the Church in his hands. He felt as if a dream come true. The boy gingerly waved the twin swords in circular motions. It fit perfectly in his hands, slicing through the air without a sound.
"As you have demonstrated, the two huge handguns also have a 'safety switch' which grants them the ability to transform into melee weapons. The blades also have sacred incantations engraved into its core, making them the equivalent of black keys, albeit a far more sturdy one."
Kirei stopped again and snapped his fingers. Shirou would have noticed his father's artificial smile if he wasn't engrossed in his new toys. Sadly, he was.
"Oh, I nearly forgot. Pull the trigger on the side while in that form."
This time, Shirou did as his father ordered without a moment's hesitation. The blade shot out at lightning speed. As a matter of fact, it crackled with electricity. The blades struck the walls on the opposite side, frying them with what seemed like an extremely high voltage.
Shirou noticed that there was a thin metal line attached to the ejected blade, almost invisible in the light. He whipped his head back at his father who was now supporting a shit-eating grin.
"You...!"
"You should've paid more attention.", his father finished for him."Well, if I may continue...?"
Shirou gritted his teeth, but instantly calmed his irritation and nodded with a neutral expression.
"Very well. All in all, this is a holy weapon of execution that is capable of granting a certain and swift death to Dead Apostles below the level of Ancestors.
However, due to its inconvenience, as there was no other way to carry the guns and ammunition but through physical means, coupled with the fact that weapons of the Church were required to be concealed at all times except combat, even the members of the Burial Agency preferred more suitable options, while others already had their own favorites. And that's not taking into account the wrist-shattering recoil it has."
Shirou's jaw dropped open. He couldn't fathom the fact that this...masterpiece could somehow be underappreciated. The blasphemy! ...Kirei was definitely a genius at getting on people's nerves.
Kirei ignored his son's indignant look and decided it was time he finished his lecture. After all, he needed to teach Shirou the true arts of the Holy Church, revealed only to executers such as himself.
"Thus, it has been sitting in the dust for quite a few years, untouched by anyone."
Kirei slapped his hands together to get his son's attention.
"Now, that being said, we shall start your training as an executioner of the church, the hunter of Dead Apostles and vile heretics. In addition, you need to be fully accustomed to your twin weapons in order to get admitted as a full-fledged executer, as well as become proficient in Sacraments, for it is forbidden for a trainee to carry weapons outside the church grounds."
Shirou nodded. He really had no reason to oppose. Regardless of the priest's intentions, he'll need all the help he could get to achieve 'salvation'.
Unbeknownst to Shirou, Kirei smirked.
While the boy was too stubborn to admit it, it is a logical choice for Shirou to use a side weapon to hide his 'ace in the hole', so to speak. Especially when Shirou disliked said 'ace in the hole' for whatever reason, although Kirei had a good guess why.
To think that he is in the same circumstances as the one who stabbed Christ...it took all of Kirei's willpower not to snicker in mirth.
Yes...it is about time for him to start practicing magecraft. Perhaps he could make his young disciple of his teach the boy?
He had a feeling that Shirou would not disappoint.
Sacraments are the exclusive right of the Church, used to fight spiritual beings.
Black Keys (basically portable crosses made out of the Holy Bible that transforms into long throwing swords when imbued with mana) are one of their many charms used against demons and vampires.
The offensive techniques some of the Burial Agency (an organization of Superior Elites that specializes in Dead Apostle hunting) make use of with their Black Keys are Sacraments such as the Cremation Rite, Internment Rite, and Shadow Pinning.
Conditions required for Holy Spear of Saint ■■■■■■■■
1, To ■■■■ God with love.
2, To be ■■■■■■■ by said God.
3, To have ■■■■■ in said God.
From Gilgamesh's Vault: Prototype of Longinus; ■■■■■'s Bident
Yes, Shirou's first baby steps start from the day he received the Roman Saint's blessings!
Several anime references in this chap. Yes, cultured gentleman over there, you got it right. Who's the most badass vampire hunter in anime history? The Hound of Hellsing!
Next time, the last week of the month before Berserker Nurse strikes. Loli twin-tail tsundere cometh. I sometimes hate my nationality...(Japanese).
Review if you are so kind, and want more! They are my blood!
X-kalibuuuur, hungry for reviews!