Part Twelve:
After the Invasion
(With Guest-Stars Galore!)
1More Spectacular Than "The 138th Episode Spectacular!" More Extreme Than "Wormhole X-Treme!"
Even with no power for the machine to fast-forward time, the battle was quickly won.
In the middle of all the unconscious Jaffa was Walter.
"I asked the Legends of Tomorrow to bring us people from other parts of space and time. Hello, Legends!"
"Hey, Walter," Sara Lance said with a mild smile and a mild wave. Her voice was kind and friendly, odd for an ex-assassin. Next to her, the tall Ray Palmer held up a hand in a frozen wave. To Ray's left, the bald Rory looked grim-faced. Looking equally grim-faced, Teal'c stood in front of Rory, and the two began a staring contest.
"These are some of the people the Legends brought. The Flintstones. The Jetsons. Those kids from Riverdale."
"Stupid Riverdale kids!" Homer griped loudly.
"And the employees of Planet Express. And others! You may all return home at your convenience, after you've had some cake. Right, Colonel O'Neill?"
"Right!" From under the tree, O'Neill gave a thumbs up.
"Those who don't eat cake may return home."
"Yeah, get out of here!" Homer shouted.
"Thank you, Homer," Walter said in a mild even tone.
In front of the Planet Express ship stood a red-haired young man with an angry look.
"I don't want any stupid cake," he muttered. "Besides, it's not even angel food cake. Let's get out of here, Lyla."
Next to him was a one-eyed woman with purple hair.
"You're right, Frye. Let's go."
Thor lay next to Mulder under the tree.
"Agent Mulder has been explaining to me his thoughts about life on other planets," Thor said to Carter and Lisa.
Mulder nodded. "The odds of encountering anything like humanoid life would be astronomical."
"But what if people from Earth were taken to other planets as slaves?"
"With all due respect, Scully, that's outlandish."
"Hey, I'm just as smart as you, even if my reproductive organs are on the inside instead of the outside." After she said this, Scully made a face. "Ugh! That's terrible. Who would say something like that?"
"I would," Carter said.
Scully gave her a look. "You're weird."
Lisa responded in a taunting voice. "I know you are, but what is Major Carter?"
Carter grinned as she tilted her head to one side and raised her eyebrows. "Got you there."
Scully bowed her head.
In the midst of all this, Walter waved his hand.
"You Terminators may return home," he declared. "Now that you and the Borg have cleared Springfield of all the unconscious Jaffa."
"I won't be back." One Terminator spoke in an Austrian accent as he trudged off.
"Yeah, we've heard that before!" Homer shouted after him. When the Terminator turned toward him, Homer shrieked and ran off.
When Walter again waved his hand, he was almost like a conductor leading an orchestra.
"And you Borg may go home."
A Borg slowly turned its armor-plated head, One red eye was lit up as it made its pronouncement.
"Resistance is….well, you know."
"Yeah, we know," O'Neill said in a bored voice. He sat under the tree munching cake.
Homer popped up next to O'Neill, tilting his head back and forth as he spoke.
"Yeah, we know! So just shut up!" he shouted.
"You tell him, Homer."
"Stupid Borg," Homer muttered.
"You're right about that, Homer."
As the Borg walked off grumbling and griping in a robotic voice, the colonel and Homer high-fived each other then gave each other a finger-gun and a "click-click" of their tongues. Much as Homer had done when he worked with Mel Gibson during a car chase caper.
O'Neill went back to eating cake.
Comic Book Guy approached a female Terminator named Cameron.
"Would you like to read comic books with me? SG-1 has no interest."
Having been programmed to blend in by being agreeable, Cameron responded with a glassy-eyed stare and a stoic voice.
"Yes. I would like to read comic books with you."
"Yay! Goody! Happy day!"
"So," Walter said as he smiled and nodded. "There's a happy ending even for Comic Book Guy."
"With someone else," O'Neill said. "Which is a happy ending for me and my team."
With the battle won, Jack Bauer spoke into a bullhorn.
"Good work, Springfield."
"Geez, Bauer! I'm standing right here in front of you." Moe, with his left eye squeezed shut, twirled a large finger in his right ear.
Bauer then pivoted so he faced Homer and his smiling brood. They maintained their daffy smiles even as Bauer spoke.
"Good work, Simpsons."
"Thanks, man."
"Yeah. Thanks, twenty-four-hour guy."
Bauer then turned to face Col. O'Neill and his team.
"Good work, SG-1."
"Give me that!" O'Neill snatched the bullhorn from him. A fist fight broke out between the two. Along with the sharp cracking noises of punches making contact, there was the grunting and groaning of the two men.
Marge waved her arms frantically, almost like old-fashioned cartoon character Olive Oyl waving down muscular sailor man Popeye.
"Colonel O'Neill! Mr. Bauer! Stop! Please! Set a good example for the children!"
"Ah, let 'em fight," Bart said with a casual wave of his hand.
Carter looked annoyed or impatient, maybe both. Certainly she looked very stern as she stood with her hands on her hips. It was different from the way Marge looked when she was stern And there was no low growling noise from Carter. Just this rebuke.
"Not that I wouldn't love to see how this turns out, but Marge is right. Stop, you two!"
Once Teal'c silently broke them up, the two sat on the ground, gasping and panting as they faced each other.
"Clearly, I won."
"You wish!"
"Bite me, Bauer."
The two men then stared as Homer and Bart did a butt-dance as they chanted.
"We defeated the Goa'uld! We defeated the Goa'uld!"
A weary-looking O'Neill waved his hand. "Guys! You want to take that somewhere else?"
"No." "Nah!"
Bauer gave them an angry look. So they went off to wave their butts in front of some departing Borg and Terminators. When one Borg turned to face them, Homer shrieked and ran off, Bart with him. But once the two recovered their nerve, they did their butt-dance in front of the amber storage units.
Of course they ran off once the people in amber stepped out.
"It's all right," Walter said as he held up both hands. "The Goa'uld have been defeated."
As he glanced around with a cynical skeptical look, Peter Bishop tightened his strong jawline.
"These people defeated a dangerous alien race? Are you high, Walter?"
"High on life!" Walter exclaimed gleefully as he lifted a finger and smiled that toothy smile. In the background, O'Neill continued to munch on some cake.
FBI Agent Olivia Dunham looked dazed and confused. Not only from her recent amber hibernation but from her surroundings. It probably didn't help when she was approached by Moe.
"Hey there, Toots." Moe smiled as he wiggled his eyebrows at her. "You want to have drinks with a guy who helped defeat the Goa'uld?"
Olivia stared. "I'm not at liberty to say," she said in a tone that was so even it was almost robotic yet still somehow pleasant.
"How about me?" a Terminator asked. "Or me?" a Borg asked.
"No," she said with an annoyed look.
"Oh," they groaned as they walked away.
"Get out of here, stupid Terminators and stupid Borg!"
"You tell 'em, Homer," O'Neill said with food in his mouth.
"Power to the people, not robots!" Barney shouted, raising a fist.
Olivia looked slightly startled as two new people approached.
"Hi! I'm Mulder, this is Scully. We're F-B-I!" Mulder emphasized those three letters as he narrowed his eyes. He then promptly lit up. "You want to work with us investigating unusual phenomena? It could be fun!"
"I already do that," Olivia said.
Scully held out a plate. "Want some cake?" she asked with food in her mouth.
"Yeah, sure."
"Better go get some," Scully said with a little laugh.
FBI Agent Astrid Farnsworth wore her usual cheerful smile with her bright eyes as she approached Moe and spoke in a voice that was soft and kind.
"I'll have drinks with you."
"Really? Ah, gee, that's swell. I promise to be kind, a real gentleman."
"But I have to be back in the amber by midnight," Astrid joked.
"We'll make the most of it."
"That's very kind of you, Astro," Walter said with an approving chuckle. He often jokingly called his assistant Astrid by other names that started with "A," including "Astro." Spying a familiar gray and white dog, Walter waved. "Hello, Astro!"
The Jetsons' dog waved back.
"You're a good dog," Walter cried out.
"Rank you, Ralter." Astro again waved his right front paw.
When Astro stopped waving, Ziva gently stroked him, and the gray-and-white dog responded with a big smile. As he pressed his head into Ziva's shoulder, he turned his eyes up toward her in a happy dreamy expression.
"You're a very good dog, Astro," she said.
"Rank you, Riva."
"Rey! Rot about me?"
With a grin, Ziva turned to the other dog, a Great Dane with a goofy look. "You're a good dog, too, Scooby Doo."
"Rank you!" Imagine there's a camera. Scooby looks into it and smiles.
There's a voice off-camera. The high-pitched voice suggests a nervous jittery skinny fellow with a beatnik beard.
"Scooby Doo! Where are you?"
"Rover here!" Scooby wails in response. He then turns back to the camera. With an angry look, he mutters, "Ridiot!"
Two tall men walked into the scene. One spoke in a voice that was deep and confident.
"Hey, Scooby! Good to see you again, pal."
Scooby stood up to place his paws on the chest of the tall man who spoke.
Ziva eyed the two new arrivals. "Who might you two be?"
"We might be Sam and Dean Winchester. In fact, we are!"
"I'm Sam, he's Dean." The other fellow, considerably taller than the first, pointed back and forth.
With a grin and a curious look, Dean glanced around. "Did we miss anything?"
Ziva shrugged. "Just a Goa'uld invasion."
"Oh, man! I love those."
Sam looked around warily. "There weren't any clowns, were there?"
Krusty the Klown burst into the scene, laughing his manic laugh. Sam gasped as he quickly stepped back.
Dean rolled his eyes a little. "Sammy! Dude! Show a little backbone, will you?" Dean turned and gave Ziva a smile. "I killed Hitler."
"You are quite the dud."
"I think you mean stud."
"No. I did not."
"This is good cake," Olivia said with her mouth full. She barely noticed as Sam ran by gasping loudly with Krusty close behind laughing maniacally.
"This is all very nice," O'Neill said in his usual cool calm voice.
"Very nice, Jack," Daniel agreed.
"And good cake," O'Neill said, raising a finger for emphasis. .
"Indeed," Teal'c said as he chewed. Carter's own words were indistinct as she talked while she chewed and gestured with her plastic fork.
O'Neill looked wistful or perhaps confused. "Can we go back now?"
Though still chewing, Carter managed to make a few words clear. "Back where, sir?"
"I don't know," O'Neill said with a shrug. He had that lost look he sometimes gets, and his voice was almost a mumble. "Back to-"
"The Future?" Homer jumped in with.
"No, Homer. Back to Kansas….or wherever."
Before Carter could inquire further, there was an interruption.
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