Characters read Luffy's Mama is Wait WHAT?
By: FunahoMisaki
(A/N: I own nothing and read last chapter)
Amande took the book and was a bit put out by how Nami had told her nephew off like that but didn't say anything. She hadn't said anything out of the way after all.
"Big news! About Straw hat Luffy!" Tamago came rushing just before breakfast was over as he held a newspaper in one hand and was panting bit to get his breath back.
"Finish eating!" Big Mom barked at her present children, glaring sternly at all of them and watching as Amande and Perospero were tag-teaming Brulee into eating as much of her eggs and grits and fish breakfast as she possibly could."
"Great the two biggest mother hens." Brulee said dryly as the two glanced at her.
"Be glad that I wasn't trying to force feed you." Amande said flatly before she went back to the book while the Straw Hats were happy to just sit and watch the Big Mom pirates like most of the room was.
"It was a bit off putting for most of the siblings to see the mirror user in anything but her favored off white dress with the roses… but it was kind of funny to see one of Smoothie's rarely worn t-shirts hanging off their sisters thin frame like a dress."
"You're a long leg and at least two feet taller than me of course your clothes are bigger!" Brulee said pointing out how she wasn't entirely at fault for how the shirt fell over her like a dress.
"Good point." Smoothie agreed as she smiled at her sister, already planning to see just how tiny Brulee would look in her shirts.
"What is it that's so important it couldn't wait?" Big Mom asked looking at Tamago sternly.
"I…not only is it confirmed that the missing Vinsmoke is indeed one of his crew members… but it seems that Straw Hat Luffy has taken down Flamingo!" Tamago rushed out making more than a few siblings choke or do a spit take."
"Well it's not often you hear that someone who's been in the Grand Line for less than two months has taken out one of the stronger Warlords!" Broye said defending how her siblings reacted.
"Flamingo? Oh the asshole trying to give away Ace's Devil Fruit. Sabo-nii called him a fruity dirt bag bastard with lecherous eyes." Luffy said as if it were common knowledge and Sabo grinned while the Straw Hats faces went flat for a moment before they all formed a slightly tighter ring around their captain protectively.
"Sister breath!" Brulee said looking worried as she slapped the choking Amande on her back and moved to hand Perospero her napkin since he had been the victim of Oven's spit-take. It seemed that Brulee had been one of the few siblings who hadn't been chewing or drinking when Tamago said those words, and thankfully Citron had been chewing instead of drinking so there was no spit-take for her to dodge."
"Sorry Onii-san." Oven sheepishly apologized to Perospero again for that.
"The Heavenly Demon Flamingo." Big Mom said knowing about the Warlords reputation and earning a nod from Tamago."
"The brat who works for Kaido and keeps his fingers on the underworld." Big Mom grimaced slightly and most of her kids and the older pirates in the room nodded in agreement, that was an accurate description of Donflamingo.
"Yes! It seems he and the Surgeon of Death formed an alliance to take him down but it says that Straw Hat and his crew did most of the fighting!" Tamago said nodding his head rapidly.
"Oh my missing son is so strong!" Big Mom said laughing and sounding proud at hearing her son being able to take down a Warlord, even if he did form an alliance to do so."
"Eh Tra-guy needed to get some licks in but he couldn't do it on his own so I helped beat him up." Luffy said shrugging his shoulders and seeing nothing wrong with him.
"Besides an alliance is like being friends and I always help my friends!" Luffy said beaming and his family was struck by how innocent and naïve he seemed to be again.
"It did." Katakuri said just before Oven could choke out the question.
"His bounty must have skyrocketed after taking down a Warlord." Oven said before stopping and giving his brother an annoyed look.
"500,000,000." Katakuri said immediately.
"How high?" Daifuku questioned and then sighed."
"Shishishishi! That's so cool!"
"Despite being a set of triplets, he and Oven never real developed their Observational Haki as much as Katakuri did and didn't ever really get used to him answering questions that haven't been asked yet."
"None of our Observation Hakis are as strong as Katakuri-onii-chan." Galette said proud of her favorite big brother.
"That got annoying for them real fast even if the others thought it was funny."
"It is! You two just get so done with him." Angel said snickering.
"Pretty good for a nineteen year old, the fact that he took down one of the Warlords is also impressive." Amande admitted after she cleared her wind pipe with Brulee's help."
"Not our first time taking out a warlord." There were a lot of looks shot at Zoro for that.
"Actually it seems he took down at least two other Warlords." Tamago corrected earning startled looks and sounds from the others.
"He defeated former Warlord Crocodile in Alabasta, and there are reports that he defeated Boa Hancock somehow during the War of Best two years ago."
"Eh I did?" Luffy tilted his head confused at that while Sanji had an aura of rage around him.
"What did you do to Hancock-swan!?" Sanji demanded glaring at his captain with fire around her.
"I don't know? All I did was hug her!" Luffy looked so confused at this and there were more than a few confused and disbelieving looks from everyone.
"Tamago explained causing most men to gape in disbelief at hearing that he took down who was considered to be the most beautiful woman in the world.
"Impressive for a rookie raised in the East Blue." Compote noted smiling slightly while Big Mom was grinning widely.
"Of course it is! You forget that he's one of my son's and your brother. East Blue raised or not, he's New World Born."
"He's a Charlotte!" Big Mom said proudly as she grinned at her son who tilted his head confused at her.
"Big Mom said with a laugh, proud of her missing son's accomplishment in taking down three Warlords, one of which was a Logia.
"Finish eating children. Tamago will fill us in as we eat since he's already started." Big Mom said noticing that her children were staring at Tamago or muttering to each other instead of eating their food."
"Can't blame you. Luffy is a force of nature and always grabs attention wherever we go." Usopp said smiling softly at his captain. His captain who somehow ended up in a shirt that read 'favorite lil brother' on the back and a 'force of nature!' on the front with a hurricane picture.
"You need to finish eating sister, you're already far too skinny." Amande murmured glancing at Brulee when their mother told them to finish eating, making Brulee nod and pick at her fish occasionally eating a bite or two."
"Sister." Hachee said narrowing her eyes at Brulee who was being stared at by everyone.
"Small stomach! Means I can't eat as much as you all! I'm not used to eating so much!"
"W-Well as I left off yesterday…he was about to be executed in Loguetown by Buggy the Clown due to Seastone and the Element of Surprise. Just before the sword beheaded him, he was grinning and then…he was struck by lightning but thanks to his Devil Fruit powers he wasn't injured!" Tamago hurried the last bit out when more than a few siblings began to look panicked again. Sure their mom might not always showed that she cared for them all, and when she did it was in a way that made her seem cruel…but the siblings all loved each other to bits even if they did have their arguments and fights."
"I…I promise you children I do care about and love you all. You know that right?" Big Mom asked looking stricken as she stared at her children.
"We do Mama. We know." Compote hurriedly assured her mother while the younger ones exchanged looks and shrugs.
"I think the only two who don't get along are Brulee and Flambe." Custard changed the subject immediately.
"Not my fault she's a spoiled brat who only cares about herself and her reputation!"
"Why you disfigured ugly co-"
"Flambe!" Big Mom stopped her lady bug daughter immediately with a strict glare.
"If you two call each other names and argue that's fine but do not bring Brulee's scar into it. There is a lot more to her scar than you know even now so keep anything relating to it out of your mouth young lady." Big Mom said sternly and Flambe scowled and shut her mouth, pouting like a scolded child.
"After that he somehow escaped White Chase Smoker and set sail with his crew to the Grand Line, entering by way of Whiskey Peak a nest of bounty hunters. Reports are…unclear but most say that Luffy didn't have to lift a single finger since his swordsman took all one hundred or so of them down by himself." Tamago said making Big Mom laugh."
"I mean…yeah that's true." Zoro admitted with a shrug but he winced a bit, remembering the fight he and Luffy had gotten into due to misunderstanding and lack of trust at the time. He swore that something like that would never happen again.
"They were probably a bunch of weaklings that used numbers to their advantage. If my son is as strong as they say then there would be no need for him to waste his time with Cannon Fodder." Big Mom said earning nods from her children.
"From there…well…um…" Tamago hesitated at this as he glanced at the siblings and then at Big Mom.
"Well spit it out." Big Mom ordered as she finished off a large cake.
"His crew was seen in the presence of Crown Princess Vivi of Alabasta…but she wasn't kidnapped…if anything it seems that he talked her into believing that… she should join his crew."
"Well yeah. Vivi's our friend and our nakama! She couldn't stay cause she loved her country so much but she's still one of us!" Luffy said as if it were obvious and his family was staring at him in disbelief while the Straw Hats that hadn't been there were just as surprised.
"Tamago said making a few of the siblings choke again at that news. If he had kidnapped a princess, that was a big deal itself…but for him to talk her into joining a pirate crew?
"He must be as eloquent as Monte-d'Or can be." Galette said wide eyed and staring at Tamago shocked."
"Luffy's got a certain kind of charm to him…but eloquent is not one word I'd use to describe him." Sanji said with a small grin recalling how blunt his captain was.
"Brulee was one of the best tacticians in the family and rubbed her chin in thought.
Her words had everyone wondering if Luffy really thought that way when he did it."
"The only time Luffy thinks are if his nakama are in danger or shit is serious and even then he's more likely to beat the hell out of whatever is making things wrong." Nami said shivering as she recalled more than one instance of Luffy showing that he was smart sometimes. For instance when he knew that it was both Arlong and that room that had trapped her.
"I wonder if he was thinking about putting Alabasta under his protection if the princess joined his crew? That would explain a bit about him defeating Crocodile. The Warlord was in his way of getting a princess as a crew mate which would give them some protection from marines and far better service and reputation at several kingdoms and islands."
"We can do that? I thought that was only a New World thing. Hey Robin can we make Vivi's home our territory too?" Luffy asked looking at his archaeologist who smiled softly at him and nodded.
"We can. It can be done in any sea not just New World. We'll call and ask her later." Robin promised and she hoped the princess didn't deny them because of her.
"Could it be that their missing brother was a tactician like Brulee and a few other siblings?"
"Luffy? A tactician?" The Straw Hats stared at each other for a moment before most of them started laughing pretty hard.
"Only if Punch first think never is a tactic!" Sanji said laughing until he was crying and most of the others were in the same condition while Luffy was confused.
"Hey Robin what's so funny?" Luffy asked looking at the softly chuckling woman who gave him a fond almost maternal smile and patted his head as he migrated from Zoro's lap to her own.
"It's nothing Luffy. Don't worry about it." Robin assured him and he smiled brightly at her.
"Okay!"