Chapter 2: See You're Provided For

Katniss's POV

When I hear the doorknocker strike about ten minutes after Peeta has left, Prim lets out a shriek.

"We're not ready!"

"Calm down, it's me she wants, Prim; get Yarrow in his bath and have the triplets help you." I stalk down the hallway into the foyer, pulling the door to and plastering on my Capitol girl smile as Effie sweeps into my arms with a cry of delight.

"Oh, my dear! You look ravishing as ever!"

Effie's been telling me I look ravishing ever since I came home at 16, even if I don't always feel it. Our district's escort can be more into appearances than most people, and she might lack a little self-awareness, but she's one of the finer people I've ever known from the Capitol. My prep team – still looking the same as they did over a quarter-century ago (I don't think Flavius and Octavia will ever retire) – greets me with air-kisses.

"We've missed you too, honey!"

"And Primrose! How lovely to see you again, darling!"

Prim pokes her head in the foyer as her little ones drag her across from the kitchen to the stairs. "You too, Effie!" She is then yanked out of frame and we hear the kids' shouting and hollering fade up the stairs.

Flavius is glancing about the house. "Now, where is that handsome man of the house?"

I frown. "Rory's at work." Flavius has had a bit of a crush on my brother-in-law ever since Rory and Prim got married twenty years ago.

"Well, he certainly hasn't been the only handsome man seen around here," Effie chirps. "I saw that darling Peeta Mellark leaving just as we were pulling in! So well mannered! Oh, what a tragedy it is he was never Reaped as a tribute! He could have been a Victor! A star!"

I wince horribly, feeling my insides churn with disgust. "Thank the State that never came to pass." The thought of Peeta in the arena… it's too horrible to even picture! And I just know I'm going to have more nightmares tonight, compliments of my ditzy escort. I quickly change the subject. "You readied Haymitch yet?"

"Portia is over there now. Peeta was considerate enough to suggest we meet him first; he said things were a little…. wild over here this morning."

"You got that right," I mutter dryly, my heart swelling at Peeta's considerateness.

I finally yield and allow my prep team to dress me and pamper me as they have since I was a teenager. Once Effie deems me presentable, I slip up the stairs and poke my head in the bathroom, where Prim and Chrissy are helping Yarrow finish dressing himself. Badan and Glad are whacking at each other.

"Grandpa Haymitch and I are gonna be out most of the day, guys…. I'll be back to say good-night, OK?" I blow my nephews and niece a kiss. "Auntie loves you!"

By the time evening falls and the Banquet is on in the Justice Building on behalf of Dakota Morzan, Victor of the 99th Annual Hunger Games, Haymitch is passed-out drunk at the Victors' table, and I am just itching for the first signal from Effie that we can go home.

Unfortunately, my escort is showing no signs of slowing down, as she takes my arm and guides me around and around the hall. We make small talk with the District 10 mentors – Elena Perez, 83 and stooped, and Roan Tully, who won several years after Haymitch and tries to make a pass at me – before heading in the direction of the punch bowl. Effie seems a little put out that I declined Roan Tully for a dance.

"Roan is a perfectly nice gentleman, Katniss…."

"He's more than fifteen years my senior and a Snowdamn racist, Effie!" I huff, exasperated. I brace myself for the predictable admonishment of my language, but it doesn't come.

"Well, excuse me for wanting better for you, child….." she sighs. There is only the slightest pause before she asks, almost wistfully. "Why didn't you ever marry, Katniss?"

"Don't start," I roll my eyes.

"But, dear…"

"Victors marrying are rare, and having children is even rarer! And good on them! They're wise not to!" I can only think of maybe two colleagues who have ever wed and borne children after their Games – a woman in Eight named Cecelia, and also the lady now slumped in her wheelchair over by the table of honor. Elena Perez, so the story goes, married for love and had twins…. who were then Reaped for Haymitch's Quell fifty years ago. I asked Haymitch about it once; he chucked an empty beer bottle at my head and thankfully missed. He doesn't like to talk about his Games.

"Would it be so bad to have a family, darling?"

"I have a family! They live under the same roof as me! My sister's kids were born in that house, and thank heavens for that!..."

"I am not talking about Prim or Rory and the children. Snow knows they're like grandbabies to me, but…. Oh, dearest, it isn't me alone – Haymitch and I just want to see that you're provided for! As much as it pains me to say it, we won't be around forever…"

"I can take care of myself, Effie!" I snarl. "I don't need to drag a man into this! Snow holds enough over my head with Prim and the kids as it is."

"But don't you want to be happy?"

"Who says I'm not happy?" I snap. "Chrissy, Badan, Yarrow and Glad are the lights of my life…"

"What about Peeta Mellark?" Effie demands suddenly.

I try not to let her see how my cheeks turn rouge. "What… what about him?"

"Well, he's probably one of the strongest examples of you having a friend, because Snow knows you don't have many of those…." I wrestle back a wince over how Effie can deliver something so savage in a straight-face deadpan. "Haymitch says he brings bread to the Village every two or three days now; he's the leading man in every story you tell when we talk on the phone…"

"I…. I don't…."

"…. and, as far as I'm aware, he's still single! I happen to think you two would make an outstanding couple…"

"Effie:" I take her elbow and spin her to face me to make damn sure she hears me. "I've never wanted to marry, and even if I did, I…. I couldn't ask Peeta to place himself in danger just by being with me." I feel tears prick at my eyes at the thought.

Effie's own orbs gleam with some sort of strange hope. "You said Peeta, not someone. So you have given this thought?"

"Only to know it would never work!" I shake my head.

"But to be with a Victor…."

"…. would be hell. All right? It would be hell! And I can't ask Peeta to throw away his good life for someone who's…. damaged."

There is a long silence. I can feel Effie's concerned eyes on me, and I turn my face away all the more sharply. I don't want her pity or her acting like a mother hen. "But Katty, dear….. you love him."

I don't speak, not trusting myself to give the game away when I know, deep down, that I gave my heart away a long time ago.

"And from the little I've seen, I suspect he loves you too." Effie lays a hand on my shoulder. "Why not give that a chance?"

"It's too late," I murmur.

"Oh, my girl – in my experience, it is never too late." She sighs. "You look a little peaky. Why don't we find that impossible man who calls himself your mentor and turn in for the night?"

"Thought you'd never ask," I mutter, as we sweep back to the head table to rouse Haymitch.