Two years yesterday
You ran away
Leaving nothing but meaning and trouble
How do I wipe away?
Was it all yesterday?
Takes me back through the years

But don't get me started on words
When you left me alone in the
Dark and the cold
Although I've been there before
And the days become shorter
The nights become longer
And I'm still here

And I know I'm so far from perfect
Most days feel I'm worthless
Cause this life ain't worth it
But this life's not worthless
And all these expressions lead me through depression
While taking the masses
And drinking the last of us here

So lay me down
And bury me softly
And bury me in the ground
And wake up now
Just do what you gotta
Just do what'll make you proud

And you're not alone
We all wanna die sometimes
We all wanna cry sometimes
No one gets out alive
And you're not alone
We all wanna run away
We all wanna last till the days go cold
But this life is perfect
And you're not alone

-Letdown. (Quiet Hours)

Quiet Hours

Two years later

Beginning of June, 2000

"Where's Harry?"

"Dunno."

"Ever since that boy got that old house into a livable condition and moved in there, I never see him."

"Mum," scoffed Ron, "he's here every night when he's not too exhausted from training, and that's about three or four times a week."

"That isn't nearly enough," continued Molly Weasley. "And what about Remus? I never see him unless it's at Order meetings. I invite him for meals every time, but he never comes. He's entirely too thin. Actually, as far as I know, the only person who ever sees him outside of meetings is Harry."

"Calm down, Mum," interjected Fred. "You know Remus hasn't been the same since Lexi died."

"Lost one too many people, that man has," George picked up. "Finally drove him round the twist, I think."

"Hush now, you don't have any idea what you're talking about," their mother reprimanded.

Standing outside the open kitchen window, leaning against the wall, Remus could picture the identical looks of all-knowing pride upon the twins' faces. He had been standing there for a lengthy ten minutes, but he refused to enter the house until Harry showed up. It had become a slight ritual over the past two years. Remus would never enter a meeting without Harry to accompany him inside.

They all knew, every single member, that Remus was still hurting and had collapsed in upon himself after Lexi's death. For years, the only thing he had seen in their eyes when they looked at him was pity. Harry was the only person who didn't look at him any differently, and it became a bit easier to tolerate when he knew there was one person he could look to and not want to shrink beneath the table in misery. Harry understood loss, pain, and grief; he understood it far better than anyone his age ever should.

There was a faint pop in the distance and Remus looked up to see Harry entering through the garden gate at the edge of the Burrow's property. He skirted around the window and walked to meet the younger man halfway.

"Everyone here?" he asked Remus casually.

Remus hummed in confirmation. "Waiting on us. They're beginning to get restless."

Harry's lips quirked in faint amusement. "I'm going to get told off for not coming by more often, aren't I?"

"Yes," replied Remus with a rare genuine smile. "Yes, you are."

Harry sighed. "All right, then. Let's go and get this over and done with."

They made their way into the full kitchen of the Burrow together. The gathered members of the Order looked up when they entered.

"Well," growled Moody from the far corner, "now that everyone has decided to grace us with their presence, can we get this meeting started?"

Before, Remus would have snorted in mild amusement. Now, he simply found a secluded space near the cupboards, folding his arms over his chest, waiting.

Kingsley stood from the head of the small table and inclined his head slightly. "Thank you for coming," he said softly, his deep voice carrying throughout the room. "I know we don't have many new things to talk about, but I would like a general update from everyone, just to see how things are progressing."

Remus focused on the conversation until his turn to report came before he lapsed into thought. He hadn't been doing much since their last meeting other than keeping a close eye on known Death Eaters. He eyes roved around the room, taking in the familiar faces and noting the changes that had taken place over the past two years.

Harry, after more than a year of cleaning and improving, had finally made Grimmauld Place habitable shortly before Christmas, and had moved in after the holiday had passed, only waiting to please Molly Weasley. Two months after leaving Hogwarts, Harry had joined the Aurors and was now more than halfway through the training.

Remus' eyes moved to Harry's right and took in Ron. He, right along with Harry, had also joined the Aurors. He and Harry were going to be partners when they finished their training. Next to Ron, hand held gently in his, was Hermione, who had just finished training to be an Unspeakable in the Department of Mysteries.

Remus had asked her once, shortly after she started, why she had decided to take that career path after everything that had happened there. Her response had been that she wanted to do everything in her power to make sure what had happened to them – to Harry – during their venture would never happen to anyone else. Remus had to admit he was proud of her. She and Ron had just rented a flat together in London.

On the other side of the kitchen, Remus took in the sight of the new members Kingsley had recruited within that past two years. Among them were two Weasleys. The first was Ginny, only a year out of Hogwarts.

Apparently, Ginny Weasley had found if particularly difficult to decide exactly what she wanted to do after she left. She had received many N.E.W.T.s – much to the delight of her parents – which had opened many different doors of opportunities for her. Eventually, she had settled on becoming a Healer and had recently started her training as well. Whether the choice was made because of the war, Remus would never know. The youngest of the Weasleys, whether over her infatuation with Harry Potter or simply tired of waiting, was currently in a new but steady relationship with a close colleague.

The second was Percy Weasley. This had come as a shock to the entire Order when Kingsley had announced at a meeting a little over a year ago that they had another new member. Remus had watched as Percy walked hesitantly, but defiantly, out of an adjoining room to the murmurs and cries of almost his entire family. Molly had clung to him and cried into his shoulder as he hugged her back and told the Order, but mostly his family, that he was sorry and that the Ministry was falling apart before everyone's very eyes. When his father had stepped up before him, Percy had taken a step back and apologized that it had taken something like that for him to see reason. Arthur hadn't taken his hand off his son's shoulder the entire meeting.

Remus sighed. While the Order had many new members, he wasn't blind to the members who were gone; the ones who should have still been there. They hadn't lost many in the past two years, but it was more than enough. Sturgis Podmore, Elphias Doge, and Hestia Jones; they were all gone and it hurt Remus' heart like he would have never thought possible anymore.

He clenched his eyes closed as a new wave of pain and grief crashed down around him. It never got better. His hands tightened around his upper arms, fingers clutching hard enough to make bruises on his skin. It never got easier to deal with. The claws inched their way back around his cold heart, scratching and squeezing. It never went away; not completely.

"Remus?" a voice questioned softly in his ear as a hand rested on his shoulder. Remus tensed at the touch, but relaxed when he opened his eyes. Tonks gazed up at him in concern, hand hovering over his arm uncertainly. "Are – are you all right?"

"I –" Remus paused and focused on loosening his grip around his arms. "Yes, I'm fine," he told her, offering a small smile. "Just a bit tired, I suppose."

Tonks nodded in understanding, apprehension leaving her face while the concern lingered. "Full moon in four days," she said too casually.

"Yes," he whispered, eyes looking toward the window and the night sky. "Yes, it is." He shuddered and his hands clenched again.

Kingsley called the meeting to an end and Harry stretched out against the wall.

"Harry, dear," called Mrs. Weasley from across the kitchen, "are you staying for dinner?"

"Oh, er..." Harry looked at her guiltily. "I'd love to, Mrs. Weasley, but we have early training in the morning. I'm going to need all the sleep I'll be able to get. Maybe tomorrow?"

"All right then," she said, sighing. "Send a message along if you'll not be able to make it."

"I will," promised Harry as he nodded. Next to him, Ron and Hermione were discussing their plans for the evening.

"I'm not going home yet, Ron," Hermione told him as she glanced around the kitchen. "I promised Mum and Dad I'd come visit for a bit tonight."

"I'll come with you, then," replied Ron, picking up her hand and pointing out his mother at the same time. Hermione wandered away for a moment, speaking with Mrs. Weasley for a short moment before she made her way back to their sides.

"No, don't worry about it, Ron," Hermione picked back up. "You can come with me the next time, all right? You should go home and get some sleep. You'll need it, just like Harry will." She turned her suddenly stern gaze to him before rounding it back on Ron. "Straight to bed, both of you. I don't want to have to drag either of you out in the morning, do you understand?"

Harry and Ron nodded and answered simultaneously, "Yes, ma'am."

Hermione turned away sharply for a moment, but Harry didn't miss the slight twitch of her lips.

"All right," she continued as she reached up and kissed Ron and Harry both on their cheeks, "I'll see you, Harry, tomorrow sometime. And you, Ron, later tonight. Be safe!" Then she was gone.

Ron turned to Harry. "Have you ever noticed that she does that quite a lot?"

"What, going to see her parents?" asked Harry in bemusement.

Ron shook his head uncertainly. "Just disappearing in general and never letting me come."

Harry snickered. "You're not worried, are you, Weasley?"

"What? No!" snapped Ron, ears turning red. His eyes drifted to the garden for a moment before he turned back to Harry with a worried expression. "Do you think I should be?"

Harry smiled and clapped his friend on the back. "No, Ron, I don't. Hermione loves you and you know she does."

Ron sighed in relief. "Yeah," he murmured. "Yeah, I do."

Harry turned his attention away to the far corner of the room where Remus was boxed in by Mrs. Weasley after trying to make a quick retreat. His face was paler than usual and his eyes wide in their sockets.

"Remus, dear, you must stay," Mrs. Weasley was demanding. "You never do and you look as though you haven't eaten a proper meal in a year's time. You know the full moon is coming up and you'll need all the strength you can get."

Harry had to admit that he agreed, but, unlike Mrs. Weasley, he had long since given up the fight against the man's stubbornness. Instead, it had become routine for Harry to stop by after training every night to make sure Remus was eating something substantial. He was once more jobless and money was a luxury he didn't have, so Harry always made sure Remus had food. The werewolf didn't like it much, but he never complained.

"I'm sorry, Molly," Remus was saying as he edged around the woman, "but I simply can't stay. I appreciate the offer, like always, but I have a prior engagement."

Mrs. Weasley sighed and stepped aside to allow Remus to pass. "All right," she said in defeat, "go on. Know though, Remus, that we're always here if you need anything at all."

"Thank you, Molly," murmured Remus. "I'll see you soon." He quickly walked out the door and a moment later, the faint pop of Apparition could be heard.

Harry shook his head as he bid everyone goodbye and followed Remus out the door. He walked to the garden gate and Apparated once he was on the other side. Harry reappeared in front of a small cottage and gazed at the old sign that hung next to the door. Speranza Cottage. His memories drifted to the weeks that had followed Lexi's funeral.

The day after, Remus had gone to visit McGonagall at Hogwarts. He had refused the returning offer for the Defense position, claiming he would not be able to properly teach the students the way they deserved. Once he had returned home, he had locked himself within the cottage, ignoring everyone's concerns and calls. No one except Harry had understood why Lexi's death had hurt him as much as it had.

Harry had left the man alone and had allowed Remus time to grieve. When three weeks had passed and he had still refused to emerge from his home, even for Order meetings, Harry had finally taken matters into his own hands. He had tried to talk to Remus and reason with the man that drinking himself into a stupor day after day was not the way to handle what had happened. When that had not worked, Harry had ordered Remus to get up, get out of the depressing cottage, and fight against the people who had caused the hurt in the first place. It had taken a bit more convincing, but, eventually, Remus had started to live his life again. He wasn't the same as he had once been, but Harry knew he never would be.

He sighed and knocked on the door. Remus opened it shortly after, a small smile playing on his lips.

"Harry," he greeted. "Somehow I thought you'd be here."

Harry snorted. "Where's this 'prior engagement' you were trying to convince Mrs. Weasley of?"

Remus grimaced as he turned from the door and made his way to the sitting room. "You know there was no such thing," he said as he sat down within an armchair. "Which is why you're here now."

"You know you're going to have to accept eventually, don't you?" he asked.

Remus' eyes shifted to the flameless fireplace. "I can't, Harry," he said. "It makes me uncomfortable. I know it shouldn't, but it does." He ran a hand through his hair and turned his gaze back to the younger man. "Any luck with the other Horcruxes?"

Harry sighed again at the shift in subject matter, but followed it nonetheless. "No," he replied, shaking his head. "I continuously think about everything Dumbledore told me and I've read over Lexi's old books time and again, but there's nothing. Every time I think I've found something, it's a dead-end. We're no closer than we were two years ago."

Remus hummed, but remained silent, fingers tracing the pattern of the chair. Finally, he spoke. "I've tracked down and questioned everyone I know to ask about his early life. There's nothing of importance to be found. Tom Riddle trusted no one, even back then."

Harry blew out a breath of air in frustration. "I'm famished. Let's talk about this a bit more over some dinner, all right?"

Remus grunted, but made no further reply as he led the dark-haired wizard into the kitchen. As he passed the mantelpiece, Harry glanced up and swallowed as his eyes landed on the framed photo of a laughing Lexi that was a permanent reminder in both of their lives that they would never see her eyes sparkle like that again.

Hours later, after Harry had returned home to gain the rest he required for the next day and Remus had fallen asleep in his armchair, gazing at a long ago photo, had anyone bothered to look closely enough, a single speck of light could be seen within the kitchen of a small cottage miles away. The wand hovered in midair over the tops of pages upon pages of ancient texts, throwing the room into sharp shadows.

Bent over the table sat a dark figure. It swept a long black strand of hair out of its angular face as its grey eyes glided over the calligraphic script. The other hand worked pale, slender fingers across the old parchment, full, pink lips moving swiftly and silently as they mouthed the words.

A sudden gasp emerged and the figure stood, long legs pushing the chair away from its body soundlessly. A glint of unnatural light entered the long emotionless grey eyes as a pale hand clenched around the table's edge.

"That's it," a feminine voice whispered into the still darkness. "I've found it."

A/N: Updates will probably come twice a week now (Tuesdays and Fridays, my schedule permitting). I have a steady lead on chapters, but if I continue to post the way I did the first part of this story, that supply will run out quickly before I can replenish my stock. Bear with me. The updates will come.