There are wounds that never show on the body that are deeper and more hurtful than anything that bleeds

Chapter Ten

Pieces

"You are a special kind of stupid, aren't you, Potter," Daphne called out to him as the students left the Defence Against the Dark Arts classroom.

After her confrontation with Harry, Umbridge proceeded to give a thirty-minute-long speech about why change was necessary and good for Hogwarts, and what they would entail for the castle, students, and staff. By the end of her lecture, no one had any questions to ask as she had made it extremely clear how fucked everyone was, all the while sweetening her prim and official phrasing with her obnoxious voice.

No student dared interrupt her, or even utter a word after what she did to him and Longbottom - even Granger seemed to have understood that keeping his mouth shut was the best thing she could do.

If only he had done just that.

It was bloody stupid of him to even speak a word in that class, he acted like he used to back in his first year. Rash, impulsive, idiotic. He had learnt to control himself, and he had done a good job at it for years now. But with Umbridge, he was completely unable to do so. He didn't know if it was how her little cough made the hairs under his neck stand up, how her smug smile never failed to stir a fire in his lungs, or the way her sugared tone made him want to tear his ears out.

Still, that was no excuse. He hadn't made it this far by being stupid or by letting his feelings control him, and he'd be dammed if he ever made that mistake again.

"What's it to you, Greengrass?" Harry snarled, stopping in his tracks and turning back towards Daphne.

"What's it to me?" She snapped back as the rest of the Slytherins made a circle around them. "You were reckless and nearly put a target on your back! If Umbridge starts looking into you, she'll start looking into all of us. So be careful with how you act towards her, Potter, because you have one more snap like this one, and I'll kick you out of the team - I won't even step twenty feet near your scrawny little arse."

"Watch. Your. Words." Harry intoned slowly, getting uncomfortably close to Greengrass and forcing her to take a couple of steps back. "Just because I'm playing nice with you doesn't mean I'll let you berate me like I'm one of your sub-par sidekicks. I could put you in the infirmary without even uttering a word, and I'd sleep as peacefully as a passed out baby."

"Potter," Malfoy warned, and Harry could practically feel the blond's hands slowly reaching for his wand.

"Don't. Even. Think. About. It." He told the boy without taking his eyes off Greengrass.

Out of the corner of his eye, Harry saw Malfoy do a sudden move for his wand, which sprung him into action. Wordlessly, he summoned his wand out of his holster and without even turning towards the boy, he trained his wand on him and cast a powerful banishing charm at him. The spell was so strong, it sent Malfoy flying across the hall over to the opposite end, where he crashed to the ground loudly.

"Anyone else wants to try something?" He asked, finally taking his eyes off of Greengrass and looking at the rest, all the while summoning Malfoy's wand from across the corridor.

When no one else said anything, Harry turned back to Daphne, who was still staring up at him defiantly.

"I'm not your lapdog who you get to order around, Greengrass, it's time you remembered who I was. Now, I'm going to get in with the Gryffindors, and I'll continue our little conspiracy, but the moment I have finally gained their trust, I expect you to keep up your end of the bargain and actually do something other than complain from the sidelines. Otherwise, I'll make sure that you and your little sister are at the top of Umbridge's hit list."

Daphne's glare grew murderous, but before she could say anything, he continued.

"Trust me, that's the last thing I want to do." He said genuinely, not really knowing if he could even bring himself to keep his threat by putting Astoria in Umbridge's crosshair's. "But I'm not who I was, you don't get to treat me like we're back in first year. Not anymore, not ever again!"

"Is that really it?" She asked dangerously. "You're still mad about something that happened in first-year, and you're threatening my sister over it?"

"No, I'm threatening you beca-"

"It was four years ago!" She bellowed. "We're in fifth year, and you're still focused over some bullshit we did when we were kids! Move on, already! We all have! You know, you've been an arsehole with all of us for a while. You've given as good as you've gotten, so don't try to play the victim here! You're just as shit as any of the rest of us, the only difference is that we've grown out of our arsehole phase we had when we were firsties while you're still stuck in it. Someone doesn't treat you like a king, and you throw a hissy over it!"

"I am not throwing a hissy," Harry said coldly. "I'm telling you what's going to happen if you even think you can act as if I'm Bullstrode and Davis. You don't get to complain over who I am, I am who I am because of all of you! And now you're crying that I'm too mean to you, well too bad, I don't give a shit. Fuck you if you get offended, and fuck you if you think I'm going to apologize."

"Guys, that's enough." Theo called out, stepping in the middle of them and stopping their arguing. "Get your shit together and stop acting like first-years! This shit with Umbridge just keeps getting worse, and this dick-measuring competition you two are having is fucking bullshit."

"No, this is what's bullshit," Harry spat. "This little group you formed. I'm done trying to work with the likes of you and Malfoy." He told Greengrass. "I don't need you, I haven't before, and I certainly don't now. I'm going to stop Umbridge, whatever it takes, you're free to watch from the sidelines like the coward you are."

Before Greengrass could even reply, Harry turned around and walked away.

As Harry entered the Great Hall for lunch later that day, he was assaulted by a mass of bushy brown hair. The girl grabbed his arm and pushed him out of the large room and onto the nearest wall.

"What's your deal?" Harry hissed as he ripped his arm from her grip.

"What kind of stunt did you pull with Umbridge?" She snapped at him. "I didn't need you to step in and help me, I was handling it."

"Oh, and you were doing such a marvellous job at it," Harry mocked. "About to get yourself into detention with Umbridge for what… exactly? The shits and giggles? The experience? The shirt that says I survived a week of detention with the High Inquisitor?"

"She was abusing her power! She attacked Neville in the middle of the class for telling the truth?"

"And what?" Harry laughed. "What did you expect was going to happen once she started taking control of the school? Did you think she'd just sit back as Longbottom kept being the same twat he has been since the year started? I told you about this, I warned you, and when I offered to help you in your Ultra Secret Santa, you waved me off."

"Help us?" She asked as if she had heard wrong. "You're more likely to rat us out to Umbridge before helping us! What, you think that just because Umbridge suddenly became High Inquisitor that I was going to bow on my knees and ask for your help? I still don't trust you, Potter, you have given me no reason to do so!"

"And that won't matter because once you begin your club, you won't have a choice," Harry rebuked. "Don't think I haven't heard about your meeting this weekend at the Hog's Head. Have you finally managed to convince Longbottom to do it?"

"How do you…"

"I have ears everywhere, Granger, if I wanted to, I'd know what you had for breakfast this morning. I assume you've already gone to the Room of Requirement - have you finally accepted that I wasn't lying to you the other night? Or are you still waiting for dear old Remus to come and fix your problems?"

"What's your problem with Professor Lupin?" She asked bluntly.

"Oh, I'm glad you asked because I wanted to take this time to explain my tragic backstory," Harry deadpanned. "Do you also want some popcorn while I'm at it?"

Hermione rolled her eyes at him.

"Look," he said after a brief pause, with as much genuineness as he could muster. "I'm not trying to trick you or even trying to do this as a way to attack Longbottom. Do you really think I like Umbridge? Do you think I laugh as she tortures kids and makes all of our lives as miserable as possible. You've read all the educational decrees she's made in one day, just imagine what she'll do in a month! I can't - I won't let Umbridge stay in power a second longer than necessary. I need to bring that bitch down as fast as possible, and the best way is to at least be a part of whatever resistance group you're planning."

"That was good," she commented. "Did you rehearse it in front of a mirror?"

"I'm not bullshitting you, Granger-"

"And how am I supposed to believe that. You've done nothing but watch as all your housemates have bullied me, degraded me, and you have this vendetta against Neville, Ron, Professor Lupin, pretty much everyone I know! And what, now I'm suddenly supposed to believe that you're a good person, that you're not the jerk you've proved yourself to be over the past three years?"

"Haven't I proved otherwise by making sure you don't become Umbridge's next target?"

"And why did you do that, exactly? I find it hard to believe that you suddenly felt sorry for me, or that you decided to care about me from out of the blue."

"Call it a show of good faith," Harry said, thinking on his feet. "You don't have to trust me, hell, you don't even have to like me. But things will get much worse, not just inside the school but outside." Hermione raised her eyebrow at him. "Yeah, I know about him. For as much as I might hate Longbottom, I don't doubt that what he's saying is true. You could use an ally in Slytherin, and I could use someone who wants to take down Umbridge as badly as I do - and I think that person's you."

Granger studied him, reading his face as if searching for any sign of disingenuousness.

"You also need the Room of Requirement for your group to even happen," he pointed out. "It's the safest place from Umbridge and one only I can control. We both know you need it, so drop the act and just say yes."

"I'm not saying yes," Granger said, still deep in thought. "I'm saying I'll consider it. However," she quickly added. "If I do decide to let you in, you'll have to sign a piece of paper which makes you promise you won't rat us out to Umbridge or do anything that would harm the group."

"Don't tell me, it will be some sort of enchanted paper?" Harry dropped a low chuckle when Granger slightly blushed. "I'd be disappointed if you didn't have something like that planned."

"This is serious," she chided him.

"I'll sign it, but I'm going to have to read exactly the wording of the magical contract you're making. You know, just to make sure you aren't screwing me over."

"Fine," she conceded.

"Then we have a deal," he said happily, for the first time in the day feeling like he'd accomplished something. "You see how easier this was without either of your two gorillas?"

"Don't call them that," she told him in a harsh tone.

"Ooh la la," Harry muttered to himself. "Someone can't take a joke."

"I'm taking a big risk by even including you in the group, and frankly, a big part of it is because we need the Room of Requirement and Professor Lupin came out blank."

"Just like I told you," he singsonged.

"But Ron and Neville didn't want any Slytherins in the group, you're the only one and only because I'm allowing it. So I'm telling you now, Harry Potter, you will behave and not cause any trouble, otherwise you'll wish you were duelling Neville."

"Awww," he patted her cheek. "It's almost cute how you think you can beat me in a duel. But don't worry, I cross my heart and hope to die or whatever it is I'm supposed to say. I'll try to keep myself in check, but if Longbottom even thinks about pulling something like his sucker punch, I'm going to make sure the only thing Longbottom will be able to teach is how to take a beating."

Harry spent the rest of his afternoon in the library, getting some essays done, as he cursed Umbridge once again for the fiftieth time in the day. It seemed that Greengrass wasn't completely useless, she had been right when she told her that Umbridge would be paying close attention to him now. He had caught Filch stalking him across the halls as he made his way to classes, and had even given him a suspicious look when he entered the Great Hall later than the rest of the students. Thankfully, he had managed to convince Granger to enter a few minutes before him, so the squib shouldn't be able to connect the two of them together.

Everywhere he went today, he was followed by the caretaker of the castle, so instead of being able to go to the Room of Requirement like most days, he had spent his time in public places like the library and the Great Hall. Right now, he knew that Filch would most likely be waiting for him outside the room and make sure he headed over to Umbridge's office for his detention.

It had been tedious, and a part of him really needed to go through some duelling simulations to help calm himself - but he'd kept his head down and gone over his homework and later the essays peers were paying him for. It was honestly a blessing that he still had essays to write, otherwise he would have died from boredom long ago.

However, when the ancient grandfather clock's chime announced the new hour, he packed his things and made his way to the exit of the library. Only to be intercepted by Theo and Pansy before he could reach the exit.

"Well, well, if it isn't Tweedledee and Tweedledum," he said sarcastically. "Did you not hear me when I said I was quitting Greengrass' conspiracy?"

"I'd say it's nice to see you too, Potter, but it really isn't." Parkinson rolled her eyes at him.

"Ouch," he said emotionlessly. "That hurt my feelings."

"That fragile?"

"What do you guys want, I'm gonna be late to my date with the toad."

"Can you really say you're looking forward to that?" Theo said mirthfully.

"Oh yes," Harry said cheerfully. "There's nothing better than the smell of your carved out blood in the evening."

"What we wanted," Pansy interrupted before Theo could reply. "Was to tell you that we're with you."

"…and with my spirit?"

"Can you stop being a prat for a moment and listen?" Pansy asked, annoyed.

"I don't think so, but I can try," Harry shrugged.

"You told us that you want to take out Umbridge, no matter what it took, and we want to join you." Theo told him.

"Why?" he asked cautiously.

"To be honest, I was never a big fan of Greengrass, and you may be an arsehole, but at least you're an honest arsehole. Greengrass seems like the type that would stab you in the back without hesitation once she's done with you."

"And you?" He asked Parkinson.

"Somehow, I think that you'll have more success at this than Daphne," she said simply.

"Look," Theo interrupted before he could say anything. "I know that you're pissed about… well… everything, and I honestly can't blame you. We were kids, man, we were more than that, we were arseholes - and I am sorry about everything, I really am. I've been an arsehole to you, and you've been just as much of a dick towards me, but I want to stop that cycle. So how about we call it even, start from a clean slate?" Theo stretched his hand towards him. "Hello, I'm Theo Nott."

Harry stared at the Slytherin's hand for what felt like an eternity, yet he knew couldn't be more than a couple seconds. A cold feeling spread from within him as he relived everything that had happened to him over the years, all the times he had been betrayed and left to rot. His body was screaming at him to run as far away as possible, forcing him to feel all the pain he'd ever felt and begging him not to let himself be put in a position where he could be in that same danger again.

In Theo's hand, he could almost see the blade that would stab him in the back, an invitation to his own suffering. He'd been down this road and the last thing he ever wanted to do was to make the same mistake twice.

But while his body was bellowing at him to run, his mind halted it completely. Harry needed allies, and he needed them badly. He'd just gone into open opposition of Daphne, he'd challenged Umbridge, and he was putting himself in danger by even talking to a member of the Golden Trio. That, and with the war stirring up outside the castle walls, he didn't think he would survive on his own for very long.

It was daunting, the possibility of being hurt again sent shivers down his spine at the mere thought of it, but it was necessary. He didn't think he could ever fully trust Theo, or Pansy for that matter. Didn't think he could ever fully open up to them like he did when he was younger. He was damaged beyond repair, down to his very core, that he didn't think he could ever even let himself have a friend.

But a friend and an ally were two different things, and it was that distinction which encouraged Harry to reach out and shake Theo's hand.

"Harry Potter," he said, his voice coming out croaked.

Theo smiled. "A pleasure, Mister Potter."

Harry turned to look at Parkinson, unsure. Over the last few weeks, she'd told him a few cryptic things, but generally she had hinted that she wanted to be on his side, for some reason. But as he looked at her, he saw cold, calculating eyes staring back at him. That is how he must've looked, his expression completely calm except for the eyes, distant and lifeless. But the look lasted only for a moment, as she blinked and spoke.

"Oh, I'm not doing that gay, kumbaya, let's hold hands shit or anything like that, but I'm down for the clean slate thing."

Harry let out a small laugh at that. "Very well then."

He proceeded to tell them about his conversation with Hermione earlier today, and the meeting he would attend to during their Hogsmeade weekend. And while they couldn't join him in the group, they promised to find other ways to help. Pansy had already volunteered to do some extensive research on Umbridge, but it would take time for her to fully get it, while Nott promised to use all of his contacts for whenever they were needed. Theo also informed him that the Quidditch try-outs had moved to the second week of October, when Umbridge would supervise them personally.

Harry had to leave the conversation quickly after that, as he would spend the next three hours in Umbridge's office, carving the words I must not disrespect my betters on his skin until his hand was shaking, dripping with blood as he made his way to the Slytherin common room.

Alright, I tried to listen to the various constructive criticism I received from yesterday's chapter and adjusted this one from the original vision of what it was meant to be. Hopefully you enjoyed this chapter more from the last one, and I appreciate every comment you leave on the fic - whether it's telling me you liked the chapter or telling me why you didn't (so long as it's respectful).

I will try to pick up the pacing of the fic a bit as we move forward, since I have spent a lot of time establishing characters while ignoring the plot. I'm also giving Harry a clearer purpose and defining his personality traits better, since I could see why some of you felt that he was all over the place.

I'm not a great writer by any means, but I'll try my best to make this fic enjoyable, lol.

Anyhow, long author's note short: Thank you for your constructive criticism, I'm listening to you guys and trying to improve! :)