Harry snatched the book away from Sirius so fast he may have left marks on his fingers. Adrenaline had been dumped into his system without warning, it was all he could do not to draw his wand and stun the nearest person, he had to be doing something, though he didn't really consider himself lucky this was his solution.

There were no words of caution, no drops of wisdom, no explanation for what they'd heard. The future as they knew it finally seemed to have collapsed with that one sentence.

For a second, Lily wondered if it was her. She certainly felt like it. The horror of Kingsley's words still ringing in her head. She'd never even heard his voice, but that somehow made it worse, like a horrible tuneless scream over and over.

"No," James managed the broken whisper of a word, so much destruction and chaos breaking out on this most remarkable day. He nearly collapsed at the idea of it all, even as he still had his hand tight around his wand for a fight he had no power over.

Harry wondered if he was going to be sick, his mind flashing through so many colors, sounds, searching desperately for his friend. For once his vivid red hair didn't even stand out, but he knew he could not leave without him, no matter what.

"Right, yeah, least someone's keeping their head," Sirius whispered hoarsely, wishing more every second his life hadn't been wasted away, that he could be there for his friend and godson in that moment. Both of them had reliable ones to watch their back, but it still wasn't him.

Harry finally managed to catch a breath again, but it was one full of regret. He knew deep down he had to leave, he was more a danger to those around him than if he'd stayed to help, but no matter how forcefully he told himself this it didn't hide his shame of running, leaving everyone behind to deal with a mess he'd been the cause of.

"Voldemort won't know what hit him," his father's voice cut right through every self doubt, Harry caught his eye still begging for assurance he knew they couldn't give.

"Right!" Sirius quickly jumped in to agree. "Fleur alone is going to make everyone without an invitation wish they were never born."

Harry managed a nod in understanding, of agreement. He tried to take solace in the fat that he felt this to be true, no one had suffered permanently from this...but he could never forget he'd ruined another day for someone else.

"That's, not an awful idea," Lily slowly agreed. "No one will think to look for you in the Muggle world any time soon."

"Wish she hadn't picked somewhere so crowded though," Remus shivered. "The less eyes on them, the better. Especially as much as the three of them are going to be sticking out."

"I can't fault her for that at a time like this," Lily disagreed, just grateful Hermione had gotten them out of there. Who knows what those boys would have done. Though she still half wished they hadn't left at all, the fate of those now a mystery. She couldn't believe it was for long or she'd go mad, surely Ron would have some way to check in on his family.

"Damn!" James burst in frustration, sharing Harry's sentiment.

"She, what?" Remus blinked slowly in confusion, going over it in his mind and unsure what he'd missed.

"She did say she'd been all packed up for days," Lily said slowly.

"She must have it all on her, perhaps an invisible bag she's been keeping stored on her person?" Sirius offered.

"Harry, I'm surprised you haven't learned by now," James managed a half decent chuckle. "You shouldn't judge magic by what you can just see."

"Right, especially when it comes to Hermione," Harry smiled.

"Ah," the four around Harry said in understanding. Harry just looked bemused now, as usual in the face of Hermione's brilliance. He didn't really need to ask for more details on this, he'd pieced it together.

"Priorities!" Sirius snorted.

"Isn't the Polyjuice Potion still in effect?" Lily asked in surprise.

"Better safe than sorry for him to stay out of sight," James reminded wearily. Lily couldn't disagree with that.

"We were already well aware of this," Sirius grinned.

"Nice to remind her every once in a while though," Remus shrugged.

"I mean, maybe not, now that I'm under the cloak," Harry tried to protest in a soft mutter.

"It's too risky Harry," Lily quickly corrected. "You'd be putting Ron and Hermione in danger, they wouldn't be able to sneak off again with you."

"Right," he sighed, though this didn't help the stress building in him, he understood it and expected he hadn't argued with Hermione at the time for this very reason.

"See, even Ron agrees," James clapped Harry on the shoulder. "You know if he was worried about his family, he wouldn't wait for Hermione's say-so to be heading back."

"Yeah," Harry managed with a bit more calm, but the fear still present in him wouldn't fully leave. He was already starting to wonder if he'd ever be able to dispel this feeling for quite some time.

"Ginny's as high up on my list as Fleur for people to avoid when angry," Sirius quickly stated. "I still remember the bat-boogie hex!"

Harry tried for a laugh he didn't feel, but it was worth it to see those around him trying to relax back into these new circumstances. It wasn't working very well, the last message still buzzing in their head like nothing they'd experienced before, and that was damn near as scary as escaping Voldemort again. He never would have thought he'd experience something in this second wave of the war they hadn't, but here it was hanging over them all. The Ministry, as useless as it had seemed to Harry, had still been a presence. Some sort of median, like a line Voldemort couldn't cross until the end. Now that had vanished, and they didn't know where to go from there anymore than Harry.

"If only they knew," Remus crinkled his nose at what Hermione could do to those idiots.

"She doesn't even need a wand," Sirius got an old look of savoring a pleasant memory. "She can just slap them round the face, hasn't done that to someone who deserves it in awhile."

"They haven't done anything yet," Lily chuckled at the two, a genuine noise that Harry tried to use to keep breathing.

"I'd have let him," James huffed. "He needs to blow off some steam."

"I'd have had all three of you on the one side," Remus shifted uncomfortably at the thought. "Tight fit be damned, I'd feel better for it."

"Guess Hermione was more worried about looking casual, even if she was failing at it," Harry sighed.

Harry groaned in pain, sinking into his seat and suddenly looking as pale and miserable as if this were starting all over again. He didn't understand why at all, could give no answer to their worried expression. All he knew was this situation had just gone up ten-fold.

Harry's skin was twitching nonstop now, he looked like he was having a fit. His hand kept trying to drop the book and reach for his wand without his conscious thought, so forcing his hand back every few seconds was making reading this twice as difficult as usual.

His parents were exchanging terrified glances for what was wrong with him, but he couldn't even stop to apologize, he had to find out himself.

"Why does that not surprise me?" Lily pouted that she couldn't do the same any time soon.

"I'm so jealous," Sirius agreed.

"Thanks for the optimism as always Ron," James could only manage through gritted teeth, well aware who would be one of the first in cuffs. Remus had last been told trying to help others, there was now no telling if he'd managed to get away, or worse.

"Let's hope they don't become regulars," Lily tried for a small smile.

"How much stuff does she have in there again?" Remus happily changed the subject.

"Enough that I'd just summon whatever I needed out," Lily said in exasperation for the idea of digging around in an endless pile you couldn't even see.

"Wait, what?!" The four around Harry demanded in both fright and shock, but Harry seemed almost calm about the whole thing now. He'd finally gotten to the part that had been bothering him so much, and now he'd entered into the memory with the calm clarity of the heat of battle.

"Prioritizing!" Sirius half gasped half screamed.

"I hate that spell!" Remus muttered to no one, rubbing his wrists at the mere thought of it, but not nearly distracted enough to take a breath away from the edge of his seat until Harry was out of this sudden fight!

"Is, is it over?" Lily demanded in a surprisingly calm voice, her wand still held tight in her hand, even if her eyes were as wide as they could go in panic.

"Can't be, no way there would just be two of them if Voldemort knew where Harry was," James corrected.

Harry couldn't help but flinch for some unknown reason, and quickly spoke past this, "no one else came storming in that second, so I'm just hoping we up and got out of there."

"That's somehow a worry and a comfort," Remus muttered. "As many times as she's been in situations like this, I'd think she'd be used to it by now."

"But," Sirius agreed with his second point, "it's nice to know none of them have grown complacent to this type of shit yet either."

"You did have other things on your mind that night," Lily said quietly. Harry didn't argue the point, his eyes still dark with that memory.

"I disagree," Sirius huffed. "I like to keep track."

"I've told you not to go bragging about that hit list," Remus grumbled. "Makes you actually look like a serial killer Padfoot, that's not going to be helpful anytime soon."

Sirius decided against arguing the point for now, considering the fact Moony wasn't wrong.

"They must have somehow managed to follow you from the wedding," Remus offered at once, it was the only solution he'd come up with.

"How? Harry's overage now, their magic wouldn't be traced more than anyone else's," James snapped. He hadn't meant to do it so harshly Remus shifted defensively, but he couldn't be any calmer with the idea his son had jumped from one fire to the next without any warning.

"They were, running through the crowd for a moment before then," Lily began to offer, before shaking her own head and correcting herself, "but, I don't know, the Polyjuice hadn't worn off yet."

"You think maybe Hermione then? Or the red-headed bloke with her? I think it's still somehow possible," Sirius uneasily agreed.

"Hopefully Hermione has some way to check," Harry finally said to put them back on focus. He could feel an answer on the cusp of his mind, but felt none of them were anywhere close to it, so he couldn't bear hearing anymore speculation that was driving his mind crazy.

Harry couldn't help but stop and look at all of them curiously as if expecting them to give him an answer, but they all remained quiet and kept whatever thoughts they were having to themselves. He eyed Remus especially, but he kept his lips firmly pressed together.

Harry couldn't help but stop again with a challenging expression in place now, and was surprised to see them smiling.

"The best damage done is when they don't even know what happened," James chuckled.

"Until it's too late," Sirius leered. However those Death Eater's had been sent there, they'd now go away empty handed and useless.

"Clever," Remus met Harry's eyes and grinned. "Under the circumstances, you made a very smart move."

Harry smiled back and kept going with a hint of pride now. Not that he'd needed it, but it felt nice to have their approval now, he still couldn't shake the feeling it wouldn't last long.

"Didn't she, use one on her parents to send them to Australia?" Harry muttered in confusion, he'd been far too distracted to ask her at the time.

"She replaced those memories with new ones," Lily corrected. "This is a much smaller scale, a different spell of just taking one small instance away."

"Thought that one was obvious," Harry couldn't help but snort for his friend.

"Maybe she liked the view," Lily couldn't help but mutter to herself. The boys around her ignored her.

"And where would that be?" Sirius asked pleasantly. "In his shoe perhaps? Surely not up his sleeve? Oh, I know where she said," he theatrically popped himself in the head, "up his-"

"Thank you Padfoot!" Remus quickly shushed him and waved Harry on.

"They still would have had to find some way to get a hold of him to do it first!" James tried to rebuttal. "No Death Eater's been near him long enough to do it!"

"Not even during that flight with Hagrid," Sirius agreed.

"I think they'd have noticed if something had been put on them at the wedding," Lily sighed.

Remus didn't say it, but he knew he couldn't be the only one thinking it. There was yet another traitor in the Order. It was the only way to explain this, the only people who had been near enough to Harry for this to be true was only people that they trusted. He couldn't bring himself to say it though, none of them could, so Harry continued with an even heavier weight upon him.

Harry visibly swallowed with discomfort, some part of him afraid to learn this answer for fear of what else it would reveal of his future. He didn't know how many more betrayals he could take.

"That wouldn't solve anything," James quickly agreed.

"Yeah, how does you getting captured fix this problem pup?" Sirius demanded.

Harry didn't argue the point, they already knew what he'd been thinking. Better him alone than with them, but they were all right of course. If that were his plan, he would have just handed himself over to Voldemort long ago rather than letting everyone around him keep helping him.

"How is that place in any way safe?!" Sirius demanded in disgust.

"It's still one of the most self contained protected places I know," Harry said evasively, even as his stomach twisted with discomfort for the idea of the place again.

"Not now that Snape can go telling any Death Eater he likes about it already!" Sirius snarled. "It's a miracle he hadn't done it back when the Order was frequenting there!"

"Mad-Eye put protection up-"

"I don't care if Moody's ghost is standing guard at the door, you don't need to go back there!"

Harry couldn't help but shrink away in fright, just a bit. Sirius had never shouted at him like that before.

Sirius winced as he realized the same, took a deep breath, and offered a sincere apology, which Harry quickly accepted. Then awkward silence hung for a few moments as Harry dithered. If he kept going he was worried Sirius was just going to get even more upset at this course of action, but he didn't know what else to say.

James finally quit just looking between the pair and decided to try mediating. "Relax Padfoot, it'll only be temporary until they figure out what just happened. Whatever, err, is at that place I'm sure won't be any worse than the last time they were there."

Sirius didn't look particularly convinced. Last time Harry had been there, his little brothers initials hadn't been on some piece of Voldemort's soul! He didn't know how or why, but he did know he didn't want to hear anymore about it, and his godson winding back up at that place was leaving the topic on his mind worse than ever.

He couldn't bring himself to say any of that aloud though, he still hardly knew what to make of it himself, so just gave a grudging nod, more for the realization he'd have to sit here and listen to it no matter what.

James smacked him upside the head. "Don't be stupid, if you do find out Snape's in there you're going to run as fast and far as you can! If the jinxes didn't work than Snape's waiting with a dozen other Death Eater for whichever Order member popped up there, and it's not going to be you!"

Harry rubbed at the spot but didn't argue that point, he had faith Hermione would talk him out of that one at least.

"Then why don't you now," Lily insisted. "I can't imagine this is the answer or it would be an even worse problem the moment you were attacked."

"Yeah, other Death Eaters would definitely have shown up by now, even Voldemort himself," James insisted. Harry couldn't help but flinch again, and they thought they had made their point.

Remus shifted with unease that at least the Death Eaters might recognize that noise and know something was afoot even sooner than they'd hoped, but with any luck Harry was going to a place that couldn't be immediately followed too. He was praying to anything Moody's charms would hold!

"I would have waited on that," Lily murmured quietly, one hand still clutching her wand tightly, the other she was repressing the urge to push over her mouth. She didn't know if she was fixing to scream or vomit, but there was some kind of stress building up in her she'd be forcibly releasing soon, and her sons getaway being open would have helped with that.

"So glad nobody ever bothered to move that," Sirius managed hoarsely, his own slew of memories spinning sickeningly through his mind, his little brother being featured in them more than his parents this time, and that was somehow worse.

James opened his mouth to say something, but Harry hadn't noticed and continued.

"Yeah, that's what I was going to go with too," he muttered, still twirling his wand uneasily in hand.

"I'm all for you camping out there until you leave!" Sirius nodded vigorously.

Harry made an uneasy face at the word camping, wondering why even this rotting old house still felt more hospitable than that word.

"Always the brave one!" James groaned, knowing he could never really hate his son for that but not exactly always proud of it like now! What was the other real options though? There weren't any, so he kept his mouth shut and waited with every muscle tensed.

"Could have been just a bit more unpleasant to him, but hopefully effective," Remus grumbled.

Harry couldn't keep going. Mouth hanging open but a scream unable to escape in his shock. Eyes unfocused and clearly still seeing what none of them could, be tried to stutter, "N-No, I, I didn't-"

His parents instantly jumped in to try and keep his attention. It took a bit of coaxing, but he didn't look like he was going to faint from the vision bestowed upon him anymore.

"Okay, Sirius, you were right," Harry groaned as he shook his head, still getting his bearings. "I regret coming back here now."

"I'm always right, I thought you learned this by now," Sirius said good naturedly, not at all happy Harry had to suffer through that, considering this hadn't even been on his radar of worries for this place.

His friends were so distracted, and honestly disturbed by what had just happened they didn't even have it in them to poke fun at him before Harry tried to keep going.

Nobody in here felt much better. Sirius was half convinced Voldemort would have died of fright seeing that thing up close!

"Anyone else just have a flashback?" James sighed, for a moment all to easily recalling Sirius storming upstairs and having this same reaction.

"Not a good one," Sirius grimly agreed.

Lily couldn't suppress a moan of pain, her eyes squeezing shut at such a callous way to put it. Harry murmured an apology while she fought back the feeling and sat back up just as quickly. She wouldn't keep letting this feeling over come her! She'd buried away this friendship years ago, it was long past time for that final nail!

"I'm missing Crookshanks already," Sirius pouted.

Harry watched those around him try for a light laugh at Ron's ignorance, Remus adding on, "you two really needed that last year of school. Hermione could have graduated during her fifth year though," he finished with a straight face.

"So, send Hermione off to do this on her own while we do homework? Yeah, brilliant idea Professor," Harry snorted.

"Yeah, Harry's right," Sirius scowled at him. "She'd spend all her time traveling around to different libraries looking for information rather than acting on any of it!"

Now they were all genuinely laughing again, most of the tension finally being eased back out of the room.

"I don't recommend naming it that," James said with an awkward smirk for making light of this. "Might confuse every other patch of dust in the house."

"None of the other specks of dust cause nightmares, so I'm okay with this one getting a special name," Remus shivered.

"Exactly!" Lily was more than happy to go back to this target. "There must be something we missed. It really wasn't that far away from Diagon Alley, odds aren't too out there perhaps someone just recognized the witch and wizard about and sent the message along to the Ministry, and the Death Eater's were the ones who went there, seeing as..." she trailed off in despair for that reminder.

"Right, makes as much sense as anything," James soothed in agreement.

Sirius was now convinced he was going to be sick. The last real memory Harry had of him was their parting words in the heat of battle, and before that another departure from this miserable house. Thanks to Voldemort though, he had another, a false memory of him being tortured. Now it was happening again, and he couldn't stand the idea of Voldemort repeating the practice, trying to lure him out again. He tried to say something of this to Harry, not even sure what he was hoping would come of it, but his throat felt like it had swollen shut anyways and he could hardly get a breath out, let alone anything else.

"No, no, no, no, no, no," James began muttering incessantly under his breath. Real or not real, Harry would suffer for it, maybe even more than Ron.

"That's how it started last time," Remus said through gritted teeth.

"We all remember," Harry snapped, the unspoken words even louder. Before Voldemort had learned of the connection, before he'd used it to take away- but Sirius was right here, just fine! He wouldn't make the same mistake twice! He kept reading loudly before anyone else could remind him of his past mistakes again.

"I, Harry I think she's right this time," Lily said quietly, but calmly beside him.

"What?" Harry couldn't help but instantly protest. "I, I need to use whatever I can, to, to take him down! If this is one of them-"

Lily shook her head sadly from side to side, but she had no energy left to argue with him about something else right now. She couldn't make this decision for him, but it was there in every uneasy twitch she would no longer approve of him doing this.

"Screw Dumbledore, he didn't even tell you what this was until it was too late!" James scowled. "You need to do this for yourself Harry!"

"I am, I could use it to help!" Harry insisted. "What if, if he thinks about the Horcruxes, where they are or something! Or about a real attack, or-"

"You'll end up exactly where you were last time," James said with a completely haggard face, the last few nights of vivid nightmares coming to the forefront. Whatever rebuttal Harry had died on his lips for such an expression he'd never have dreamed upon his dad. "Whether it's real or not, Harry, I just hope you manage some way to do this without those."

He looked like he was fighting back tears now, and Harry shriveled up with guilt causing this on them. What he wouldn't have given to hear his parents say this to him any time before...but then if that had been possible, none of this was likely to have ever existed. He turned almost shamefully back to the book with no answer for them, some grain of stubbornness still residing deep inside him saying he would do whatever he needed to.

"Oh, right, under Voldemort's right hand man! No wonder it was so utterly botched!" Sirius recalled with so much sarcasm it seemed to hurt.

"So, you agree it's useless to try blocking this out?" Harry asked in surprise of this alliance.

"Oh Godric no, I'm begging for this to never be mentioned again, let alone you trying it out!" Sirius shivered in disgust. "I'm just acknowledging what Hermione never would, you were never given a satisfying answer to this problem."

Harry sighed, knowing he wasn't going to get a better answer.

Harry had received many of the same sensations again while learning of these memories, he wished this wasn't one of them. The feeling rising slick and fast now while he was trying to look confident he would not be so easily duped again wasn't helping, not that he had any delusions he was fooling them anyways. He was quickly losing the will not to excuse himself to the bathroom, hands trembling along the pages at the recurring pain.

Sirius visibly flinched, his mind suddenly panicky and flaring. If Harry sought out his name, he'd see what was right beside it, could put together an answer Sirius refused to believe was true!

Harry hadn't even noticed, he was so focused on his past rather than them for once, determined he could get through this without inciting another fight.

"Oh thank Merlin!" Harry gasped in relief, at least that was something they could all agree on.

"Only Ginny?" James half stuttered even as he really did smile. "I'm worried for the twins, can't have one of them getting caught with a Veela cousin at a time like this."

"Or poor new Mrs. Fleur Weasley," Sirius agreed with mock fright. "Oh the poor dear, probably weeping for her dress and party favors, after having killed every last one of those idiots for invading her day."

Harry hitched a smile into place for them, just wishing he could end this now on a nice note instead of the horror he could still feel waiting to pounce on him the moment he let his guard down.

Harry couldn't help the same now, even if the pain was only in his memory and not really in his head, the book fell to the floor and he clutched his skull in pain again. He fought his way back from it just as fast, gritting his teeth and feeling as if he were pushing a mountain away from him, but the promise of relief prevailed and he found himself back in another time, but still a home.

He couldn't bring himself to apologize for this, and no one looked as if they wanted to press him for the matter. There was no good answer for this torment he was still going through.

Harry stopped there with an unreadable look on his face. It was certainly some level of pity for his once school rival, but mingled with the horror of everything else going on and his own pain mixed in. What had just been presented was beyond reproach to everyone, yet another new level Voldemort had been shown capable of.

"Oh, so it's not just me?" Sirius managed in a mostly raspy voice that still fought to sound casual. "Good, I was worried I was going soft there for a moment."

"You Padfoot?" James shook his head at the very idea. "No, trust me, this is just confirming my fear. I'm predicting Harry's to launch a rescue mission for Draco now to get him out of there, I'm half tempted to myself."

Harry wasn't entirely sure if they were joking, but either way he couldn't be drawn into their conversation with this horror so fresh in his mind.

"I've finished," he whispered, hating how final that really felt. He knew he was a long way from being done with this tale, but something inside him had ended alright. The hate he'd once held for Malfoy was gone, to be replaced with something he could only hope one day he could share with everyone suffering with this war, another life.

HPHPHPHP

Another Life, aka, what was almost the name of this fic before I decided I liked the current one better. I went through a few things, including Proper Life, It Was Back Then, and All Lives End In Beginnings. There was no point in sharing this...