Sasuke's adventures in attempt to conquer his fear of massages….SasuHina

This story is purely for fun, Naruto does not belong to me. Just a sillyfic I thought of randomly. This is considered AU / crack-pairing, since Sasusaku is now canon. But I still (sometimes) like to live in a world where Sakura is still annoying, and Sasuke still cannot stand her. :P someday I'll write something more canon…maybe. Until then!..

Uchiha Sasuke liked being in control. Like the decisive moment during a fated battle, just before victory was claimed - the certainty in knowing his position of strength, the ability to determine his enemy's outcome, whether they continue to exist or be obliterated. He liked the fact that the choice to return to Konoha after the Fourth Shinobi War was HIS choice and HIS alone. It was his choice to come home, and his choice to join the ANBU force, which has turned out to be quite a decent gig, a good fit for him to excel at what he does…and remain in the shadows. Uchiha Sasuke was always the master of his own destiny.

If control was his comfort zone…then massages were the antipode. Massages were for the weak, helpless, and perverted. Who in their right mind would want to be "manhandled" by somebody, without being allowed to "manhandle" right them back? Massage oils? Disgusting. Incense candles? Nauseating. Indeed, for Sasuke, to be a recipient of massages was one of the worst forms of torture.

Unfortunately for him, that's exactly what his doctor Tsunade recently prescribed to him, after diagnosing him with a case of severe "muscular fatigue and chakra depletion-itis" (or something like that.) He had overworked his body through his daily rigorous training and tasks, according to the ba-chan. But don't worry, she had told him. A few sessions of massage therapy will do the trick. Until then, no physical activity.

Sasuke was NOT happy to be given this diagnosis. Laying flat on your face, half naked, and allowing a random stranger dig their fingers into your body? No, thank you.

But despite his discontent, the Uchiha knew well enough not to challenge Tsunade. Although the former Hokage was now retired to a more cushy peaceful job of running Konoha hospital, after Kakashi was inaugurated in her former role a year ago, she managed to retain that feisty, bossy, and commanding side. Not to mention she could easily kick his ass in her old age...at least in his current incapacitated state.

Today was his first scheduled session. He put on his shoes and left his apartment. Although he hated to admit it, the former avenger's body was in the most unfortunate painful condition. Even the simplest of movements caused him to be sore. That morning he had trouble even putting on his shirt. Just raising his arms over his head to fit into the arm holes felt like there were large boulders crashing down onto his body.

Arriving at the hospital, he checked in. He frowned slightly at the blushing receptionist who welcomed him, as his impatience was quickly overtaken by apprehension. Let's get this over with. My body needs to get back to being useful again.

The nurse brought him to the treatment room, and left him there to change…or strip down rather. Sasuke took off his clothing quickly, grimacing momentarily at the aches he felt. He put on the tiny disposable boxers that were provided, which were made of some kind of white netting. It hugged his parts quite snugly and was rather see-through. The room was dimly lit, with a bed lined with white towels and sheets. There was a pillow with a hole cut through, where he supposed one's face should go when laying downward, peering over a small dish of water with a Katsura leaf floating atop, the very tree that was Konoha's source of national identity and pride. In the dish was also a cherry blossom…how very bizarre, given it was the middle of summer, Sakura season was long over…

"Hi Sasuke-kuuuuuuuuuun!" Sakura entered the room at that apt moment, dressed in a tight white hospital uniform.