So, this is my first bleach fic. I was working on another byaruki one, but this plot bunny would not leave me alone until I write it, so here it is. One-shot.

Warning: This fic has Byakuya/Rukia as pairing, not as siblings. If you for some reason think this is incest and is disgusted by it, simply don't read it. Flames will only make me laugh of your simplemindness. Also, there's lemon. Reviews and constructive criticism are welcome. What else? Hmm it might be a bit confusing in the beginning, but everything is explained. On with the show! :)

Japanese translation:

onii-sama/nii-sama: "brother" in a very respectful way (no appropriate translation to english)

hai: "yes"

Never leave your toys scattered around.

.

..

He should not feel any of this. He should not be so mesmerized by her violet eyes, by her small lips shyly touching the tea cup; should not be so entranced by her small, delicate moves. He should not look.

His eyes averted from hers, searching for something else to focus, anything would serve. He closed his eyes.

He should not be disturbed by the silence, this calming silence that has always been a safety wall between them. The old, comfortable silence. Now, now he knew how she sounded... and the silence became unbearable and it haunted him, over and over, day and night. Especially at night. He closed his eyes again, trying to erase memories. That should never be. Should have never been. It never has, technically, and it never would, again.

He must never do that again. He would not. It was clearly a mistake, the biggest mistake of his life, and surely there had been some impressive ones to compete for the title. He silently concentrated on his own meal. She should not notice his gaze - was it so hard before? He should stop looking. He definitely should not remember. And he most certainly should never do that again. Time would erase it all. Things would go back to place accordingly. It would be the same as if it had never happened at all.

"Byakuya-onii-sama." she was staring at him. "I ask your permission to retire for the night". She was thoughtful, he could see.

"You may leave. Have a good night." He said, impassive face, impassive voice. At least he could still trust the firmness of his voice, if his treacherous eyes refused to obey him.

She stood up and bowed, leaving her dinner unfinished and a faint sweet scent that was uniquely hers as she passed him. That was obviously one more thing that he should not have noticed. Nor the fairness of her skin or the lightness of her steps. Definitely not the way her body relaxed with the distance she put between them. That was something he would rather not have noticed at all.

Byakuya stood up, while his mind played games of comparisons with Hisana. That was the reason it started, wasn't it? The immoral pact between his body and heart to convince his mind that it was only fair to let him taste, at least one more time, something that has been denied for so long. To feel, at least one more time, the spark of hope, of happiness he believed forever turned to dust and ashes. He knew this pact was still strong and going, as his legs followed the trace of her scent in the air. And just for a little moment, he wished he did not care.

But he was a Kuchiki and he did care and when his legs stopped by her door, he was sure that he would never commit that same mistake again. An error, once, could be at least, in a way, somewhat understandable, not excusable, definitely regrettable, abominable even, but understandable. But not like this. Not with the knowledge he had now. It would be simply inexcusable, unacceptable, despicable, unworthy of the name he bore, and that's why he was absolutely sure that he would never…

"Nii-sama?" Rukia gasped, surprised at the tall and slim figure that just came through her door, closing it behind him with closed eyes.

He opened his eyes and stared intently at her, realizing, astonished, that all his thoughts, as much as he tried to grasp them, seemed to vanish in thin air and that his mind went completely blank. It felt like the frame of mind he wore when it was only him and Senbonzakura, preparing for an immediate battle. The last thought he was allowed to have, after passing his eyes over her table, was that everything was there in the same place, and he cursed himself for his guilty relief. Then he went numb.

Rukia, who was sitting at her bed, stood immediately, waiting for an explanation. None came, and she asked tentatively:

"Is there anything that I could help you with…" She said slowly, as he moved, with measured and steady steps, until he was too close, invading her personal space. "…Byakuya-nii-"

"Don't" he silenced her with his fingers "call me that".

She didn't understand what he meant by that and the confusion in her face was replaced by shock when his lips replaced his fingers in a longing kiss.

A whirlwind of thoughts passed through her head, too many and too mixed for her to decipher and suddenly she realized she was kissing him back, and it didn't feel even close to how wrong she thought it would. Actually, it felt absolutely right, as if she had kissed him a thousand times before, as if it were the obvious thing to do. Still, she made sure to keep her eyes perfectly closed to avoid facing him, even in the darkness of her room. She surely didn't want to meet his eyes now.

He broke the kiss and started a trail of light kisses from her jaw to her neck, until he reached that special spot under her earlobe that was so perfect and it was too late when she realized the moan escaping her mouth. She felt his breath getting harder and deeper and just let him take her, as he moved them both to the bed just behind her.

For a second she wondered if he, too, had had a dream that could have possibly incited such possibility in his mind, but either way, the truth was that all those years of trying to forge a clumsy relationship into something sibling-like had just crashed down in a feeble moment. The aftermath would be surely unpleasant, but she didn't want to think about it now, not when his hand was opening her sleeping robe in a light caress.

Gathering some courage, she touched him for the first time, eyes still half-closed, her mind making a quick note on how firm his shoulders were, as well as the rest of his body. She gently removed the kenseikan from his head, dropping them on the floor and at the sound of it she realized, once more, that he couldn't be anybody else, that it was really him, and a mix of fear, anxiousness and lust took her over. She passed her hands through his silky hair, pulling him into another kiss while his hands memorized every inch of her skin, finally reaching her breasts.

It didn't take long for them to be fully unclothed, both too lost in their passion, and when he entered her she realized that, although uncomfortable, it was not as painful as she thought it would be. That was something that varied from girl to girl, or so she heard, and she was probably one of the lucky ones. She hoped he didn't ask about it, and he didn't, which was a relief. This was her choice, after all. He speeded up his movements in a steady pace, knowingly, while his hands kept their dutiful work on her, and that was the last coherent thought she was able to have before she had her climax, whispering his name. Not 'Nii-sama', but his name.

That was all it took for him to follow her.

He didn't want to let her go, and for a long hour he just stood there, his nose touching her neck, memorizing for the last time her marvelous scent. Then, noticing she had fallen asleep, he disentangled himself from her.

Awakened by the movement, she opened her eyes slightly, and saw him by her desk putting his clothes on.

"Please put your clothes back on and come here," he asked in an undecipherable tone. She obliged quietly, sleepy and intrigued.

When she got closer, he turned to her, something in his hand. His eyes were full of sorrow, longing and… could it be... ?

"I'm deeply sorry," he said, lowering his eyes, and a flash was all she saw.

"I could not find it here, I'm sorry for disturbing you at this hour, Rukia," he said matter-of-factly, putting back the modifier on the table.

Rukia, still dazed, simply replied. "It's… ok… onii-sama."

"You should work on developing some sense of organization, thought. You should not let your shinigami artifacts lying around like this."

"Hai, nii-sama."

"Have a good night," he said, and moved to the door without turning back. This guilt should be only his to bear.

"Good night" she said, closing the door. What was it that her brother was looking for so desperately at this hour again? - She wondered. Not being able to remember, she let sleep wash her question away.

So, yeah, Rukia using the memory modifier so many times gave me ideas... I guess it's her fault? ;) Am I too evil for that? -.- Also, I feel like writing more, what kind of byaruki stories would you like to read? As I said, I'm writing another one... I just need an inspiring day. I love this pairing!

Also, please review, it makes me a happy bunny!

take care,

Wynn