"Daddy, why didn't you and mom have a wedding?"

Zola's question didn't seem to phase Derek. She was sitting by the kitchen island having breakfast as Derek stood across reading the morning paper.

A few weeks ago during dinner, Maggie announced Winston had proposed. They were thrilled Maggie was happy and in love -especially the kids. Zola asked if she could be a bridesmaid since was too old to be a flower girl. She offered Ellis as a flower girl instead. Bailey was just happy to have another uncle in the family as he and his dad were outnumbered. And Ellis started drawing pictures of everyone in dresses and suits. She even drew a picture of her mom in a white dress and a bouquet of flowers and her dad in a suit kissing with the beach as the setting of their 'wedding'. The picture was proudly displayed on the fridge and made Meredith giggle every time she saw it. She was definitely a Shepherd even if she looked like a Grey and acted like a Grey.

Derek looked up and grinned at Zola, "Your mom hates weddings."

"That's not true!" Meredith claimed as she walked in from the hall.

Derek raised his head towards her with a knowing look. He'd been married to his wife long enough and had known her well enough to know that was a lie. She hated weddings. She warned Maggie that she could no longer be a part of any wedding party as every time she was a bridesmaid, it ended in someone leaving or the couple divorcing.

Meredith rolled her eyes, "Okay it's true. I hate weddings. But that's not why we didn't have a big wedding!"

Derek smiled and shook his head as he went back to his paper and she made her way to the cabinet to get two plastic cups.

Zola looked up at them with a confused look, "But, why didn't you?"

" 'Why didn't we' what?" asked Derek.

Zola tilted her head in desperation, "Have a big wedding?"

Derek thought about it for a moment. How was he going to explain to her that Izzie had planned the perfect wedding for them only for Derek to give it back to her and Alex? How was he going to tell her about Izzie if Zola only knew Jo as his wife?

Derek looked towards Meredith for help as she grabbed the orange juice from the fridge, "Ummmm, well we were supposed to have one but we gave it to your Uncle Alex."

She poured the juice into the cups and paused for a moment. That seemed like such a long time ago and she hadn't really thought about Izzie unless Alex brought her up.

Meredith sighed and smiled at Zola, "It's a long story, but your dad had a great idea to let the wedding go to someone who loved big weddings."

"Uncle Alex hates big weddings too." Zola laughed.

"True, but that time was an exception because it wasn't really a gift for him ." She replied as she stood next to Derek and rubbed a hand up and down his back. She turned her head towards the hall and called out, "Bailey, Ellis, your breakfast is getting cold!"

Meredith turned to Derek and gave him a slight peck on the cheek as he smiled. His selflessness, especially on the day of their planned wedding, was one of the reasons she loved him. Underneath the arrogant self-proclaimed Great God of Neuro was a caring, husband, father, son and friend. Even if his ego was sometimes too big for his own good.

Zola thought for a moment as she watched the sweet interaction between her parents. She had never seen any wedding pictures of her parents and she had never really asked. All she knew was that her parents were married and they loved each other. She just never saw any actual proof of their wedding.

"So you and dad aren't really married?"

"That's not true. We have our post-it to prove it", Derek replied as he looked back up at his daughter. Their blue post-it was still hanging above their bed.

It had been years since the DC debacle but he still felt a pang in his chest when he pictured their post-it in a broken glass box. Meredith had confessed that in her anger, she yanked it from the wall and dumped it in the basket next to their bed. He didn't blame her. He couldn't. He had given her enough cause to make her think he was running from her for good.

That was all in the past now. Their marriage was stronger and as if his newly found epiphany of never wanting to miss out a moment with his family wasn't enough, a deadly accident reminded him not to take life for granted. More than ever, he was grateful for the little things his family and life had to offer.

"Dad, a post- it doesn't really count." Derek recognized the look Zola was giving him. It was the look Meredith would give him when she grew impatient and was trying to win an argument. Genetics may not have played a factor here, but that look screamed "Meredith's child".

Derek raised his eyebrows, "It does to us! And we went to City Hall to make it official the day we met you." Derek tilted his head at his daughter with a smile.

Meredith let out a slight giggle as she recalled the day, "Your dad finally had the perfect excuse to finally make it official and drag me to city hall. It was perfect. We were married and met our baby all in one day!"

Derek chuckled as Zola stared back at them. She was still confused, "But that's not really a wedding."

Her parents laughed. Not at her, but at the thought of them having a big fancy wedding. They never imagined their kids would have these questions until Maggie's wedding planning had piqued their interest.

At that moment, Bailey and Ellis came running down the hall interrupting their thoughts.

"Daddy can you help me up" asked Ellis as she tried to climb the chair. Derek smiled and picked her up and helped her settle in the chair next to Zola as Meredith set their plates in front of them.

"Zozo, why the sudden interest in big weddings?" Derek asked as he made his way back to his spot across from her.

Zola took a deep breath as she picked at her food.

"Well Aunt Maggie is having a big wedding soon and Aunt Amy is probably going to have a big wedding. But you and mom-."

"What makes you think your aunt Amy is having a big wedding?" Meredith interrupted as she turned back to place her plate in the sink.

"I heard Uncle Link tell dad-"

Meredith snapped her head towards the family and looked from Derek to Zola, "Zola! We've talked about eavesdropping". She lowered her voice, "and you can't mention that near your Aunt Amy it's supposed to be a surprise."

Bailey and Ellis giggled as they took big bites of their waffles.

"Sorry, mom. It's just that a wedding is supposed to be how you show someone you love them and that you'll be with them forever, right?"

Meredith and Derek glanced at each other. Her girls had very different views on weddings from herself. She hated them but they loved them. All three of their kids took after their dad in their shared optimism towards life. She was grateful they did and that she and Derek were able to raise them to see the beauty in the world. To be loved by both parents who desperately wanted them and never made them feel unloved. She had promised herself she wouldn't let them feel unwanted or unloved like she did. She would show them they were so worthy of being loved and to love.

"Well to some people weddings do mean that but, just because your dad and I didn't have a big wedding it doesn't mean we don't love each other."

"Your mom and I love each other so much we didn't need a big wedding. We just knew we wanted to be together forever. And then you three came along." Derek said as he ruffled Bailey's hair with a smile.

This was true. Meredith was too scared to have children but she opened herself to the possibility. And when the universe seemed to turn against them, Zola came home, Bailey was born, and Ellis came at a time when they almost lost each other. They were meant to be the family they were now.

Derek never intended to bring the topic of his first marriage up. It never really seemed like something his kids had to know, especially at a young age. He especially did not want to tell them how that ended and the complexities of the beginning of his relationship with their mother. It wasn't that he and Addison weren't on friendly terms either. Sometimes, she'd be brought in on a case at the hospital and they'd exchange friendly conversation or even a cup of coffee. She and Meredith had also seemed to mend any bridges between them- or at least be civil. Each of them were happy in their respective lives and marriages.

Meredith turned to him, seemingly reading his mind. She lightly nodded as she walked towards the coffee maker to pour herself a mug.

Derek took a deep breath, "You know, I had a big wedding once."

The kids' looked up to their dad with confused looks. Yep, definitely Meredith's kids with a sprinkle of Derek.

What did he mean? There weren't any pictures of them with their parents in dresses or suits.

"You did?" Bailey asked, "When did you and mom have a big wedding?"

Ellis looked up from her breakfast towards Meredith, "Momma did you wear a pretty dress?"

Meredith smiled, raised her eyebrows and leaned close to her, "No I did not."

Meredith walked to stand behind her kids as Derek stared at them, "I had a big wedding except it wasn't with your mom."

The children gasped, "What?"

Well he told them. There was no turning back now.

"I was married once -to someone else- before I met your mom."

Zola scrunched her eyebrows together. This was too confusing. Derek seemed to pick up on her thoughts and continued, "We had a big wedding in a big church. You remember, I told you about your Uncle Mark?"

The children nodded. Derek told them many stories about Mark, especially around Sofia. If Mark had been in his shoes, he would've done the same.

"He was my best man. I wore a dark suit, she wore a big white dress. It was in a big church with too many people. It was a big wedding."

"What happened?" asked Bailey.

Derek looked up to the ceiling briefly. What happened? Well, he caught his wife cheating on him with his best friend, he fled to Seattle to pursue the position of chief of surgery at Seattle Grace, until he met a girl in the bar and fell in love. Then, Addison showed up and he chose wrong. He eventually found his way back.

Meredith watched him be lost in his thoughts. Their story was complicated. Sometimes too complicated. By all accounts they should've probably stayed away from each other but deep down they both knew that meant a lifetime of pain.

She watched him carefully when his gaze fell back to her. He wanted to be as honest as he could.

"Her name was Addison, and she's very nice. Your Aunt Amy is very good friends with her."

Derek took another breath, "We realized we weren't happy and if you aren't happy you need to make the choices that do make you happy even if it's hard."

His kids listened intently. Maybe this was too much information too soon.

His gaze fell back to his wife. Suddenly, she was just the girl in a bar and he was just a guy in a bar. And he fell in love all over again.

Derek smiled, "I met your mom and I fell in love with her. She made me happy. She was like coming up fresh air. Like I was drowning and she saved me."

"I knew she was the one I wanted to be with forever. That's why our post-it says forever," Derek looked to his kids and back to Meredith. He was sure of one thing. He would spend forever telling her how much he loved her. In many ways.

Meredith seemed to blush as she looked down and then turned to the kids.

"Not everyone needs a big wedding to show you love them and you want to be with them forever. I didn't and I know your daddy loves me and I love him. That is more than enough."

Derek continued to look at Meredith and smiled.

"You can have a big wedding if you want to. And it is nice to celebrate that love with your family. But at the end of the day, it's about what you and the person you love want. And all I want is to be with you three and your mom."

The kids went back to their breakfast as Ellis said, "Momma you should still wear a pretty dress and have a big wedding."

They all laughed as Meredith turned to Derek with a smile, "They're definitely your kids."

Derek hummed as he turned to look at the family they made. Like coming up for fresh air…