A/N:

This chapter is kind of short and just... purely ZoLu. It really is. I hope you guys are down for that! There's such a wide range of chaotic shit going on here that I'm not sure what, exactly, draws people in half the time? Anyway, my entire being is slowly condensing into a ball of pure stress and tbh I'm craving a six-month sleep. Hibernation? Yes, please, H-word me right now. Wake me up only for Halloween and maybe Christmas.

Enjoy these two dorks, y'all.

It's going to be a Bad Day. Zoro's only just woken up with a nightmare still on his lips and already he can tell. Already is that asshole prickly feeling in the back of his mind scratch-scratch-scratching away.

Already there are echoes of Alvida in his ears and this day is going to fucking suck.

The day does indeed fucking suck. But it's not in those big, dramatic ways he's gotten used to on this trip. It's in those small, little, horrible ways that just make the universe a suckier place to inhabit on the whole.

They miss breakfast because fuck alarms and customers, apparently. And Merry won't start but it's nothing big. Just an– alternator? Something. Zoro doesn't hear clearly because what does he know about vehicles and also he's been counting in sevens to try and keep from ravaging his nailbeds bloody. (What the fuck. Seriously, what the fuck? Of course he'd pick up Luffy's habit and turn it from mildly bad into pure pain.)

There's tripping and accidents and barking his shin on a fucking low table and— who the fuck put that there?

It's a really, really shitty day. And every step of it prickles more, scratches more, echoes more. Until Zoro is all but clawing at the walls and screaming. He's snappish and off-putting and Chopper has already retreated to the safety of Franky because Zoro, too, is an asshole today.

Hancock keeps grilling him with unimpressed stares, followed each time by a quick glance at Luffy. She reiterates do me a favor and stop sabotaging yourself a dozen times without ever saying a word.

He doesn't bother with trying to follow through until they're finally sitting on the queen bed in their hotel room. The silence is fucking oppressive and it speaks for itself. Luffy has been walking on eggshells around him ever since their faces mashed together, which isn't at all what he wanted. He's so keyed up from every tiny, bullshit incident today that he just— bursts.

"Why invite me?"

Luffy swivels to look at him. Like, full-body turns toward him as if he's asked the most important question in the world.

Or at least Zoro thinks that up until Luffy cocks his head and squints at him.

"Why not?"

He sighs. "I know you like to— to put on this dumb face or whatever sometimes, but there's no way you don't hear the shit people say about me. And I'm not talking about the actual fights, Luffy, so don't— don't pretend you're that oblivious. Because— fuck."

Because, sure, the Asshole Loner reputation is bad, but the worst bits and pieces have nothing to do with that label. It's the whispers that have followed him since sophomore year, through every school because the internet puts shit like that on blast. And he doesn't— god, he wishes he hadn't reinforced everything Alvida called him in true fuck-up fashion. He doesn't know how many times he's been walking down the hall and someone fucking winks, blows a kiss, makes a crude gesture or—

"Hey, Roronoa, how're your knees?"

In that guy's crotch, not two seconds later, since he'd had to respond somehow.

"So is it a money thing or are you just that desperate?"

Because yeah, he'd done that. A couple of times. He needed the money for food, for lessons at Koshiro's until he'd leveled up to an employee, plus whatever shit Alvida broke in one of her fits that mattered more to him than her.

His personal favorites had come from the people who bring it up in casual conversation. In the middle of the hallway. Loudly.

"Okay, look, I heard you cry during sex. Not the usual happy or sappy crying but, like, the fucked up kind of crying that makes whoever you're with super uncomfortable. Whoa! Hey, no judgement! I'm actually kinda into it, so maybe you and I could—"

And that was right about the time Zoro decked him hard enough to knock him out. The guy's friends just whistled at him as he walked away, his middle fingers firmly in the air. He'd been throwing up in the bathroom by lunch that day because thanks, asshole, for the reminder of that terrible fucking moment.

So, yeah. Lots of stuff circulating under the surface of him being violent. It's just subtext by now, to anyone who goes to their school. And he knows his reactions are the reason things have spread like wildfire, so he just— he only has himself to blame. For all of it. Kids are cruel, but he'd given them the ammunition to run wild with. Just like he'd let Alvida—

He swallows, shakes his head.

That's it.

Asshole Loner, with a side of Easy.

"Yeah," Luffy says. Kind of sighs. His eyes are warm and sad and then they're abruptly not. They're steely with certainty like Zoro's never seen before. "Yeah, we know. I know. But that's exactly why I wanted you."

The exact phrasing steals his breath, the mere concept of what Luffy's suggesting even more so. All that he can manage is a squeaky, "Huh?"

"I hate bullies." Luffy's frown is severe in comparison with his usual grin. "I just— Chopper's told you about it. I know he did because you melt around him like you don't with anyone else."

Heat engulfs Zoro's face at the description. "I don't melt!"

"You totally do, but that's not the point."

Zoro rolls his eyes. "Then get to it."

Luffy hums. Falls silent again, amusement gone without a trace. The mood flip is fascinating to watch. Luffy isn't actually that expressive most of the time. He's smiley, sure, and always exaggerates his shock, but that doesn't translate to being expressive. Half the time, he has a blank face. Zoro doesn't know what he's thinking until he actually says it.

"It's kind of like that for me but with everyone. I'm so tired of watching people do nothing. It's so easy to just accept people and let them grow out of their mistakes and— and just be fucking friends." He furrows his brow, hands fisted in the denim of his cut-offs, frayed ends destined to become even more distressed alongside Luffy. "It makes me..." he huffs, shoulders heaving with it, and the denim suffers anew.

"Mad?" Zoro finishes when it doesn't seem like Luffy's going to.

He nods, throat bobbing with a gulp. Zoro's heart drops at the sight of tears rimming his eyes.

"Furious," he chokes out. "I hate how they're treated. Robin for— being smart? Like, what the hell even is that? Teachers like her, so what! She works harder than anyone I know. She doesn't get handed anything and she's not cold. Fuck. Why do people think that? She doesn't ramble or make small talk, but that just makes her warmer. She focuses on the small things to make a bigger picture instead of wasting your time with all the stupid stuff, so you know she loves you. But— ugh."

Luffy sucks in a breath and is off again before Zoro can even begin to formulate a response. "And Chopper. I don't get it. I don't know why anyone would ever want to hurt him. He's so gentle and— and he cares so much even though, after everything he's been through, I think he should get a pass on caring about anyone ever until they earn it, dammit. He has the biggest heart and— or maybe Nami does? She's not a bitch." His expression hardens even further.

Zoro nods, dazed by the storm of words and feelings Luffy's spinning his way. "I know. Nami is great, even if people are too stupid to see it."

Luffy nods back, resolute, voice growing louder the longer he talks, though he seems oblivious to the way he's practically shouting by the end of it. "She's not a bitch. She just doesn't take anyone's shit, and cares too much, exactly like Chopper, except maybe worse. Once she trusts you, that's— that's it, you're hers. But not in like... in like, a possessive way. She'll just protect you forever because you're her people and that's all there is to it. But nobody gives her a chance to soften up and it's such bullshit, and we're so lucky, Zoro!

"I'm so lucky to have all of you and be friends and I won't let them be treated that way. Usopp's stories and hair and nose are fine. Franky can be huge and cry a lot and still be manly! Ace likes nail polish and sometimes skirts and definitely fire, and there's nothing wrong with that at all. I want to fight everyone who even—" Luffy breaks off with an angry huff. He barrels on like he never stopped just a heartbeat later. "And Sanji isn't some spoiled, rich kid burnout like everyone seems to think! He—" He sighs, looks at Zoro. "He hasn't told you, so I'm not going to but—" he waggles his finger in Zoro's face "—just know that they're totally fucking wrong!"

"I mean..." Zoro shrugs, letting the finger-wag happen. "He isn't that bad. He just teases a lot, I guess."

Sanji is a mystery to him, but Luffy is evidently very passionate about this.

"Exactly! So people can just shut the fuck up, or they can decide they like getting the backs of their asshole knees kicked out every time I see them!"

Zoro has... actually heard people complain about this in multiple classes. He hadn't really known it was Luffy at the time, but that just makes it so much better.

Luffy exhales like he's trying to expel all of the negative energy he's worked up. Well, Zoro isn't sure he should call it negative because there was so much love in every word. He freezes as Luffy stares, molten eyes cataloguing every fidget.

Finally, he smiles. And it's for Zoro. Nobody else gets to have it right now.

"Zoro, just—" Luffy takes his hand. "It's so fucked up, the way people talk about you. Talk to you. I don't know if half the stuff people say is even true, but I don't care." He squeezes, voice ramping up into something louder. "If you slept with people for money or just because you wanted to or— whatever! I. Don't. Care. It's your body and no one should tell you what you can or can't do with it. That's like someone telling me I can't eat as much meat as humanly possible! Or research polar bears until I literally never want to see one ever again!"

"Are you sure those are really comparable?" Zoro laughs, high and delighted, even if he can't quite believe all of what Luffy's telling him.

"Close enough!" Luffy chirps, then sobers again fairly quickly. "Still. People talk, but you're not alone. I'm not going to let you be alone anymore." He squeezes again, makes sure Zoro's paying attention. "Kiss or no kiss, you're one of my best friends. That's the bottom line, okay?"

Dumbly, Zoro nods again. The only thing he can do is nod as his heart tries to jump out of his chest, right into the palm of Luffy's hand. God, he didn't know the extent of how much Luffy cared. About him. About everyone.

He never realized how much he's been treating this like a game until now. Like nothing he does matters much. Eventually, he's going to get slammed with game over. But they're people, and he affects them in his own small ways, even if they do choose to drop him once school starts again. Even if he'll never matter as much to them as they do to him.

"I can live with that," Zoro says, and means it.

"Yes!" Luffy beams. He cocks his head, wrinkling his nose a bit. "Should... should we actually talk about the kissing thing?"

"I can probably live with the kissing thing, too."

What? Zoro blinks. What in the fuck. Did he just— he's not lying, but that is definitely not the first thing he should have said.

Luffy's eyes go comically wide. "Really? But I thought—" He almost looks offended. "You got so mad that night, and..."

"I was just being a dick. Who says best friends can't kiss sometimes? Like—" Zoro's mouth and body are lightyears ahead of his actual thought process, riding the waves of confidence from their conversation. He leans forward, slow, giving Luffy time to back away. But he doesn't, so Zoro presses his lips to Luffy's cheek, quick and light. A shock runs up his spine. "Like that, I guess."

In a strange role reversal, Luffy gives him an open-mouthed stare. His eyes dart back and forth between Zoro's face and their hands. Slowly, he nods. "Huh. Yeah, okay. Zoro's right."

Is he? He doesn't know, but he's excited for whatever the fuck he's just done. He's feeling... rebellious, maybe? Like he deserves to take the affection someone's offering him for once in his goddamn life. He's tired of things like this being ruined for him. Of being scared to even— even kiss somebody. And Luffy wants to, for whatever reason. He doesn't seem to find him gross like half of their school does, like Zoro internally does. He knows he can't convince Luffy that he's as bad as everyone says unless he tells him about Alvida, so maybe he can just soak it in while it lasts.

It might be selfish. Luffy might change his mind as early as tomorrow. The others might judge him and decide the rumors were true. Everyone might hate him by the end of the summer.

He's fine with that.

The nauseous dread rising in him says differently, batters against his skull with the list of cons. The loudest being that his new friends will join the chorus of people who call him a slut behind his back, or to his face, and Luffy— he swallows down the lump in his throat.

Luffy could become just another voice to fuel the rumor mill.

So, okay, maybe he's not quite fine with that, but—

But there's a more permanent solution to all of this if it turns out to be the thing that finally breaks him. It doesn't matter right now.

Because for once, Zoro evaluates the millions of ways this could go so very wrong and leaps anyway.

He raises a pinky in the air. "Best friends who kiss?"

Luffy stares at him for a long moment, then blinks hard. "There's literal elevator music in my brain, sorry, I'm not ignoring you, I swear," he says in a rush, then grins. He locks his own pinky around Zoro's, giggling the whole time. "Best friends who kiss!"

They shake on it, and the fact that their fingers slip into a casual hold the very next second makes Zoro think he might've bitten off more than he can chew.

Luffy's face lights up. "Hey! Hey, Zoro, I've got it."

"Got... what?"

"A signal, so we know when and where it's okay to kiss. You probably still don't want me to just spring it on you. So, something super simple is good, right?"

"That's—" Zoro blinks. He keeps being surprised by how thoughtful Luffy is when he really shouldn't. "That actually sounds great. What's the signal?"

Luffy holds up four fingers. "Alright, so—" he wiggles each finger in order as he speaks "—lips, cheek, random place, or nothing. I hold four up, or you do, and we tap which one is okay."

His brain is kind of frozen. "Nothing?"

"Yep!"

"So we can just... opt out entirely. I don't have to do anything?" He doesn't know why it's so hard for him to process, but it just is.

"Zoro." His happiness dims a little. "Of course not. Why wouldn't that be an option? I—"

"Yeah, yeah, of course!" he blurts, shaking his head. "I get it. I'm just... making sure."

Luffy pauses, scrutinizing him. Eventually, he shrugs. "Let me know if you want to stop altogether, though, okay?"

He nods. "Okay."

Four fingers hover in front of him. "Testing, testing! One, two, three!" Luffy hums, wiggles the same pinky he swore on earlier. "Four? Should it be one, two, three, four? That only makes sense, right?"

Zoro laughs so hard he can barely tap the first finger to get his do-over.

Hancock: This is not quite what I had in mind.
Zoro: Just let me LIVE, goddammit!