A/N: Thank you all for reading. I hope you're enjoying it. Please note that this chapter is mainly the reason this fic is rated M due to the sex scene. If you wish to skip it, it's between Michelle fiddling with a knife to waking up slowly. Enjoy! ;)

Chapter 49: Climbing That Mountain

"In a perfect world, you could fuck people without giving them a piece of your heart.
And every glittering kiss and every touch of flesh is another shard of heart you'll never see again."
― Neil Gaiman, Fragile Things: Short Fictions and Wonders

I woke up, inhaling sharply and forcing the nightmare back as I pushed myself up. Sam was still asleep, and luckily for me, facing the opposite direction. Remnants of the dream faded as I got out of bed. It was a small win that I didn't wake up screaming or fighting. I got dressed quickly and headed downstairs. The sky was still dark and most of the house was quiet.

"Evening pet," Spike called out from the living room.

"How'd you know it was me?" I asked as I walked in.

"Only one who wakes at this hour, peaches, is you. Especially with the racing heartbeat," he pointed at me, cigarette between his fingers.

"What time is it?" I asked.

"Nearly sunrise. The wanker should be back soon. The wannabe Slayer is wandering the outdoors. Said you think someone's following. Something we need to know?" The tv nearly reflected off of his skin.

"Probably not," I admitted. "But better safe than sorry."

"You sound as bad as the watcher." He sat up slightly and exaggerated his accent. "Blimey, read a book, cuppa tea, end of the world." He waved his hand. "I miss the blood and the fighting. Never expect to miss the killing," he mused. "Should have stopped to smell the corpses."

"Gross." I headed for the kitchen. "Are you hungry?"

"Why, pet, you offerin'?"

"No," I looked back at his leer. "But I could heat some blood up for you if you want."

"Sun's rising. I don't like to sleep on a full stomach." He pushed himself up off of the couch. "Tell the kid to tape the soap opera for me. She knows what I like."

I nodded, unsure of what kid he was talking about. "Night Spike." He grumbled something I didn't catch and headed for the basement. There was a blur of motion as the sky started to lighten in the window and the basement door slammed shut. Eric was home.

I ate some toast with peanut butter and drank some water before I left out the backdoor. Jane would make herself known soon for training. Five too if he was around. I stretched quickly before I took off running. The tension from the last day bled into my run, pushing me faster. There was too much happening and I needed to gain some sort of control. Running helped.

We had an audience.

It had been a while since I fought Kelly. That was likely what drew the attention, though I was pretty sure the men had started it. They had come out to watch us training and others followed.

"Begin."

I nodded at Jane's words and slipped into position, facing Kelly. "Ready?"

"Am I ever?"

I struck first. I moved quickly forward, starting slow as Kelly blocked the hits. I swung my foot, catching her by the ankle. She rolled as she fell and darted out of the way.

"Yeah! Go Kels!" Dean called out from the sidelines.

I waited for her to stand. She rushed forwards. I blocked the hits before redirecting her punch and pushing her behind me. I turned and kicked out. She stumbled forward but caught herself.

"Kelly! Faster!"

She glared over at Jane before she turned to face me. I moved forward. She blocked my kick, I let my foot drop before pushing forward. I hammer punched down into her thigh.

"Fuck!" She struck out and caught me in the shoulder. Both of us backed up. "Who the fuck punches someone in the thigh?"

"Aim a little lower and that's how you break a knee," I said. She glared at me.

"Come on Kels!" Dean called out again.

It was interesting fighting Kelly because she was quick and knew how to duck out of the way, using her height to her advantage. I twisted in a turn and grabbed her arm, flipping her over my back. She kicked up as she landed and nearly caught me in my chin. I was used to fighting Jane though. She'd have to be faster. She rolled to a stand and I distantly heard Dean let out an "oh!"

"Michelle! Don't hold back!" Jane yelled at me.

I winced and looked at Kelly. "Can I apologize now?"

She sighed. "Is this going to hurt?"

"No more than usual."

"Alright, let's go."

The fight continued and I pushed her harder. I didn't want to instantly push her into the level I was used to with Jane. I swept my feet under her and she fell hard. I leaned over her and knelt on her shoulder. She moved slightly and in seconds she had a gun pointed at me. I paused, then moved slowly off of her.

"Where the hell were you hiding that?" I asked. She got up, keeping an eye on me.

"Same place as usual," she said. "Can never be too safe."

I grinned at her. "Makes sense."

"Yeah!" Dean came running over and once Kelly had put the gun back, picked her up and swung her around. "That's my girl!"

I rolled my eyes but smiled as she grinned down at him. I looked over at Jane. "Round two?"

Kelly left to show off her shooting skills while I continued to train with Jane. It was harder and faster than fighting Kelly and I was forced to rely more on instinct. Every hit of mine that made contact with Jane made me grin. Even with blood in my mouth from one of her punches, she looked rougher than she usually did. That meant I was getting better. She had me pinned and I managed to break her hold and use my legs to kick her off. She grinned widely at me.

"You are doing well." She spat out blood on the grass.

"Thanks," I grinned at her. I was definitely sore, but I felt good. I felt strong.

"Go to the man-beast. He is waiting for you." She nodded to the side where Sam and some of the others were standing. "You have shown your skill." She reached down and offered me a hand. I took it and she pulled me to my feet.

"Thank you," I repeated. It never felt like enough. Jane had given me the skills I needed, and she continued to push them to grow.

She nodded at me. "Go."

I left her, brushed the dirt off of my pants as I walked up to the others.

"Holy shit," Dean said as I got to them. "I knew you were a ninja, but that's something else."

I grinned at him. "Want a rematch?"

"Hell no."

I turned to Sam. "Well? Think I can win that championship?" I asked. He grinned down at me.

"I think you have a chance. That was amazing."

"Thanks."

"You're terrifying," Derek said. "Can you...can I train with you one day? Fight you, I mean."

"You've been training with Jane, right?" I asked, looking at him. I had yet to see it, but I knew it had been happening. I assumed it was when I trained with someone else. He nodded. "Alright then. Let me know when your next session is and I'll come. Maybe Jane can give you more pointers if she sees you fight from a different angle." I turned back to Sam. "I'm going to shower. I'll be back."

"Wait!" Kelly called out. "I have an idea!" I looked over at her. "Let's have a paintball game. A real one. Dean and I versus you and Sam?"

"Yeah," Dean said. "Come on, Sammy, afraid to go a little two on two?"

Sam scoffed. "You afraid to lose?"

"Then it's on. Right Mish?"

I shrugged. "Sure, I guess."

"Great! Let's get the stuff." Kelly grabbed Dean and led the way.

I looked up at Sam. "I hope you're good because I have not improved since the last time you tried to teach me." He just laughed.

I was covered in paint by the time it ended. I had gotten better at dodging, but that was against Five. Kelly knew me too well. Sam managed to only get hit a few times which was impressive considering his size. I showered last since I was the worst off. By the time I got back downstairs, almost everyone was settled around the living room eating. I was handed a bowl of the stew and I settled on the couch, tucking my feet up under me. Someone pulled out cards and Veronica decided to teach Chloe how to play poker and win. I leaned against the arm of the couch where Sam was as I watched the game progress.

Dean got roped in and dragged Kelly with him. I had a feeling it was going to get nearly as competitive as monopoly did. Logan was boasting as he played whereas Derek looked confused and tried to whisper things to Chloe.

"Where's Remy? Or Jane?" I asked.

"They went off together. You know…" Kelly trailed off. I nodded and Sam leaned down to whisper to me.

"Did you do the tests yet?"

"What?" It took a second before I realized what he meant. "Oh! No, not yet. We figured we'd wait until it was a little...less busy." I smiled at him, trying to hide the bluff.

"Okay," he leaned back.

The game ended with Dean winning. At least until Spike showed up and demanded to be dealt in. I got up and collected bowls before putting them in the sink. The teens were on dish duty considering they didn't do much else.

"There you are." I looked up to see Eric coming in from outside.

"What time is it?" I asked. "Didn't the sun just set?"

He stared at me for a moment. "The sun set an hour ago." I tried not to react at the loss of time. I wasn't sure how long I had been watching them play cards but I didn't think it was that long. The day flew by.

"Right. What's up?"

"For you and Kelly." He put a package down on the table. "I expect you both tomorrow night at the bar." He left, back the way he came. I moved slowly to the table, unsure of what was in the box. The last time Eric brought us something, it was IDs. Something told me this wouldn't be the same.

"Kels!" I called out to her. The box didn't move so that was a plus. "Kels!"

"What?" She came into the room, followed by Dean and Sam.

I pointed to the table. "Eric brought us something." She looked at it cautiously.

"What's in the box?" Dean asked. He grinned. "What's in the box?" he asked again, exaggerating the last word.

"Not any of our heads, so that's a plus," I said. He lifted his hand for a high five which I returned.

"Well, let's find out." Kelly moved forward and opened it. "Oh." She reached in and pulled something out. It was a small book. She looked it over before throwing it to me. "It's for you." I caught it and read the title. It was a bartender's guide.

"Haha," I muttered. I put it on the counter behind me. "Is that it?"

"Nope." She pulled something out and handed it to me. It was a small velcroed case. I opened it and pulled out a folded knife.

"Oh," I breathed. I opened the knife and turned it over. "It's perfect."

"For what?" Dean asked, looking between Kelly and I. "Why is the vamp giving you knives?"

I looked over to see that Kelly had one too. The blade was about three or four inches long. It looked sharp though. "Because I asked him for one." I grinned. "I wanted a way to carve sigils into the bar. This looks easy to carry and hide."

"Yeah," Sam cleared his throat. "You asked him for a knife?"

"Sure," I shrugged. "It's to help the bar...and me." Dean tossed a look at Sam. I looked back into the box. "Anything else?"

"No, that's it," Kelly said. "Where am I going to put this?"

I shrugged. "We'll figure it out."

"Do you know how to fight with a knife?" Sam asked.

"Yeah," I said. "Giles wanted us to have a wide range of weapons we knew how to use. I've trained with the staff with Remy, machetes...we'll probably start tomorrow in getting a feel for this."

"Wait, she had you fighting with machetes? Like, actual ones?"

"Yeah, what did she say?" I asked Kelly.

"We'll learn faster when faced with a real weapon than a stick." She answered.

"Fuck," Sam muttered. He ran a hand through his hair.

"I always knew she was scary," Dean said. "Let's pack up the knives. We can go over them with you tomorrow." I clutched my knife tighter. "Fine," Dean rolled his eyes. "Keep it. Just don't cut yourself."

"I'm not five, Dean."

"Could have fooled me," Kelly teased. "Didn't you almost burn down this place once?"

"Shut up."

I kept fiddling with the knife as the night progressed. Sam put a hand over mine before I could open it again.

"It's not changing."

"I know," I said with a shrug. "I just like it."

He smiled softly at me before looking around. Most of the teens had gone to bed which left Klaus, Lafayette, Spike, Dean and Kelly still playing cards. "Come on," Sam grabbed my hand and pulled me from the couch. I followed him, curious.

He led me upstairs and I ignored the catcall I heard from one of the others. Sam's grip tightened on my hand slightly as we walked. Part of me expected to be more nervous, maybe the same anxiety the last time I slept with someone, but I didn't. I trusted Sam.

"My, my, Winchester," I teased as I walked into our room. He closed the door behind us. "What brings us here?"

"Can't I want to spend time with you?" he asked softly, moving towards me. His hand pushed back some of my hair, trying to tuck it behind my ear. "Away from the others."

"Course you can," I said. I couldn't stop myself from smiling at him.

He sat down on the edge of the bed, grabbed my hand and pulled me towards him. I sat on his lap, straddling his legs. I ran one of my hands through his hair before wrapping my arms around his neck.

His hand slid up one of my thighs, before resting there. The warmth was seeping in through the pants I was wearing. He touched my cheek with his other hand, thumb brushing over the skin. His eyes met mine and there was something in his expression that I couldn't place.

"Sam?" My voice was softer than I expected. "You okay?" I ran my teeth over my bottom lip, waiting. He didn't answer.

His arm moved around my waist, pulling me flush against him as he tilted my face to kiss me. It was hard, demanding control and I opened my mouth to deepen it, to get him closer. I could taste the beer he had been drinking.

I didn't even like beer but I could kiss him forever. His tongue swept against mine, teeth nipping at my lip. I wanted more.

I moved so I could slide a hand up his shirt. His muscles felt like they contracted under my touch. I scraped my nails lightly across his abs. He broke the kiss and pulled off his shirt. I blinked in surprise at how fast that was. I couldn't help but smile though. He was beautiful and not just because of the muscles that were clearly there. I followed his example and his hands went to my hips to steady me as I pulled off my shirt. I threw it behind me on the floor. Sam's gaze went down, looking as though he was trying to memorize the shades of my skin. Encouraged, I took off my bra.

His eyes darkened. His lips claimed mine again quickly. Hands went across my back, pulling me closer. It felt strange to feel his skin against mine, but also so welcome. He broke the kiss, lips trailing a path across my jaw and down my neck. I rocked against him, trying to build up the heat that I was feeling. He sucked hard at a spot that sent shocks through me. I felt myself whimper, all the while trying to get closer.

"Sam."

"I got you," he murmured against my skin. He stood up suddenly, one hand under my ass the other on my back, holding me against him before he turned and dropped me back on the bed. He settled himself between my legs as I adjusted to the quick change of position.

His mouth went back to my neck before moving lower. He kissed and sucked at the skin, leaving marks that I already knew would be there for days. My breath hitched as his lips enclosed around a nipple. One of his hands went to the other breast, brushing his fingers across the skin before squeezing.

I ran my nails down his back as I arched up into him. "Sam," I breathed.

"I'm here, baby, come on," he said against my skin. He moved, giving me a second to breathe before his hands pulled at my pants. I lifted my hips, trying to shimmy out of them to help. I heard the sound of his jeans hitting the floor before he settled back between my legs. I just wanted him closer. I wanted more.

He kissed me quickly before going lower. His hands gripped my thighs, spreading them further apart while he kissed a path to the top of them. This was new. He pressed forward, opening me further as his mouth made contact. My breath hitched and at the first lick, all thought was lost.

"Fuck." My hips bucked up automatically as he continued sucking and lapping as if I was something worth tasting. As if I was something delectable. His fingers dug into my thighs, holding me in place. My hand dug into his hair, half tempted to shove him away or make sure he could never leave.

I tried to stop myself from moaning. This was nothing like losing myself in his kisses. I felt him shift before he added fingers, on and then another. He did something that it suddenly felt like I was seeing spots. The tension built and I heard him say something though I couldn't focus to make out the words. He pushed in another finger and sucked hard on my clit. I cried out his name as the tension broke. I felt myself shudder as he stayed where he was, still licking though he pulled out his fingers.

I tried to catch my breath. "Holy shit," I muttered to myself. I felt him kiss the inside of my thigh as he finally pulled away.

"When did you get this?"

I looked down at him, tempted to cover my face just so I didn't have to actually see him after that. It didn't make any sense but I still felt exposed and wanting. He was focused on the small anti-possession tattoo I had there.

"When-" I tried to clear my throat so I didn't sound as high-pitched and breathy as I thought I sounded. "When we first got them," I said. He glanced up at me, eyebrows raised. I shrugged. "Can't be too careful."

He laughed slightly and I could see the remnants glisten on his chin. I flushed at the reminder. He wiped it away before moving up and settling himself back between my legs, his body pressed against mine. I could feel him hard but he didn't instantly move, wanting more. He kissed me again.

"You're fucking beautiful," he said softly.

I couldn't help but let out a breathless laugh. "You really don't need to compliment me, Sam," I whispered back. "Especially after that." I tried to reach down and touch him, wanting to help him along. He grabbed my hand and pinned it next to my head.

"Oh, we're not done." He kissed me hard. "Hold on." He sat up and I watched as he reached for something on the floor. He looked like a greek god in the light. It was surreal to think that I was here with him, that he wanted me.

He tore open a wrapper and I watched him roll a condom on. I never thought of that as an appealing thing to see but he made it look good. Though, it was likely because I knew what was next. I grinned at him as he settled himself back against me and I leaned up to kiss him quickly. I hooked my leg around his hip as he adjusted himself before pushing in. His eyes clenched shut.

"Fuck," I swore, throwing my head back at the feel of him. I knew he was large but it was a whole other thing feeling it. My breath caught in my throat.

He groaned before kissing me again. "Shit, baby, you're fucking tight." He paused, both of us trying to catch our breath. "You okay?"

"Yeah,"

"Just relax. I got you."

I smiled. "I know." He pushed in slowly before his hips finally settled against mine. The stretch was painful, but he kissed me softly, distracting me from the full feeling. "Come on, Sam," I murmured against his mouth. "Move."

He withdrew slightly before his hips snapped forward. His kiss turned rough as he picked up the pace. I ran my nails down his arms and back, my legs wrapped around his waist, trying to keep him inside of me. The stretch was easing and the tension was building.

His arm went under my back, pulling me up towards him. One of his hands dug into my hair as I held onto his shoulders. His arm wrapped around my waist, pulling me down onto him. I couldn't stop from crying out at the feeling. Somehow he was deeper. Sam's mouth went to my neck, dragging his teeth across the skin before he mumbled something into it.

"Sam, please!" I needed more. I wanted more. He was the only thing I could focus on; him and everything he was making me feel. He drowned out everything else.

He slowed his pace for a moment and I tried not to whine at the lack of movement. "Knees," he said. He pulled me off of him and shifted back. "On your knees, baby."

I felt weirdly empty without him but did as he commanded. As soon as I did, his hand was in my hair, gently pushing my head down while pulling my hips up with his other one. He pushed himself back in and grabbed my hips. The pace increased quickly. His fingers dug into my skin. I braced myself against the headboard and lost myself in the feeling of him. I reached for my clit, wanting to help get to that point. He pushed my hand away and ground his own finger into it. The tension broke again, throwing me off the edge and I came hard, crying out for him.

Sam leaned over me, his chest against my back as he kept moving. He kissed the back of my neck before his grip tightened and his hips snapped forward a couple more times before he stopped, groaning into my hair. We stayed like that for a moment, where I was completely surrounded by him. I could have stayed like that forever. He finally pulled out and moved back off of the bed for a moment. I collapsed and turned around to lie on my back.

Sam fell on the bed next to me. I was covered in sweat but felt like I could barely move.

"Holy shit," I muttered again. God, I had been missing out. I should have done this earlier.

Sam laughed lightly. "I'll take that as a compliment." I smacked him lightly in the chest before I could stop myself.

"I gotta get cleaned up," I said. I shifted before I paused. Moving was not ideal. "In a minute." Sam laughed again.

I eventually willed myself up. I dressed quickly in sweats and one of Sam's shirts before I headed for the bathroom. It was pure luck that I didn't run into anyone and I was grateful for it.

Sam was half asleep when I returned.

"Mm, no clothes," he muttered, peering at me with half-lidded eyes. It felt way more awkward getting undressed this time and slipping into bed next to him. Sam lay on his side and pulled me in to be curled up against him. "Sleep now."

"Aye aye captain," I said. I wasn't entirely sure sleep would come as the realization set in that I had just slept with him. Sam passed out easily. The sound of his breathing, the warmth of the bed and our previous activity caught up to me. I was out faster than I expected.

I woke up slowly, despite the fact that something was touching me. I looked to see Sam staring at me, his fingers trailing up and down my spine.

"Morning," I muttered.

"Morning," Sam responded. He sounded as enthused as I did.

I pushed myself up on my elbows. "Everything alright?"

"Dean and I are leaving today," he said softly.

"Oh." I knew it was coming, but it felt different now. He leaned forward and I leaned back. He looked confused. "Morning breath," I muttered. I suddenly felt self-conscious.

"I don't care," he said before he kissed me. It was slow and tender. He pushed me back and leaned over me, deepening the kiss. All thought of morning breath was gone and the rest of the morning was lost to him in the same way the night was.

I stepped out of the shower, feeling sore and yet good. Sam was packing when I got back into the room. I felt his eyes on me as I got dressed. "Haven't you seen enough?" I tried to tease. It was a little uncomfortable to be under his scrutiny in the light.

"No."

I rolled my eyes and tried not to smile. I turned to him. "Ready?"

"No," he said again. He didn't look like he was teasing though. I frowned and stepped up to him.

"Sam, are you okay?"

He sighed but forced a smile. "It's fine. I just...don't want to leave."

"All the boys say that," I winked. He did not look amused. "Don't worry," I reached out and grabbed his hand. "We'll be here when you get back."

He let out a huff of air. "Yeah." He smiled at me. "Thanks, Michelle. For everything."

"Now I bet that's what you say to all the girls," I teased, trying to break up whatever tension this was.

"Just you now."

"Okay, Romeo. Let's get breakfast."

"Actually, we're not staying." He swallowed. "Dean stopped by when you were in the shower. We gotta hit the road, get to the next step."

"Oh, okay. Well, I'll walk you out." There was something odd happening and I wasn't sure if the weirdness was just because we had actually slept together. Hopefully, it would fade before he came back.

Kelly and Dean were already outside when we got there.

"Ready?" Dean asked, looking at Sam. Sam nodded. "Alright then." He looked between Sam and me before he motioned for Kelly to follow him a little closer to the car. Sam turned to me.

"Michelle, I...just keep going, okay? Keep fighting and getting better and looking out for yourself."

"Of course." I frowned up at him. "Sam, why are you saying this?"

He grabbed my face with both hands and kissed me. It was hard and desperate, hinting at something that I couldn't place. I grabbed the front of his shirt, trying to keep him there. He broke the kiss and leaned his forehead against mine.

"Be safe," he whispered.

"You too."

He kissed me again quickly before he picked up the bag that he dropped and headed for the car. Dean waved but didn't look in my direction as they got in. They looked like they were arguing about something before the Impala roared off. Kelly walked up and stood next to me.

"So…" I could almost feel her grinning. "Sounded like you finally climbed that mountain."

My eyes widened and I turned to look at her. She was definitely grinning. "Walls are not soundproof."

"Oh my god," I said. My face heated in a blush. Who else heard?

"How was it?" Kelly asked. "Wait, no, how big is he? Is he proportionate? Just show me with your hands." I turned and walked away from her. "Come on!" She called out after me.