Dil wasn't a happy baby.

First Tommy hadn't even noticed him and he hadn't been able to make up for everything. G'andma had told him he needed to be a better baby and he wanted to but how could he if his brother didn't notice him!? And then daddy, instead of taking him to the playpen where he could sit on his pillow and play with Tommy, had taken him down to the under ground place. Which wasn't too bad because Dil really didn't want to be near his toys because he was afraid Goober or Reptar or the other toys would think he should be like them and turn him into a toy. He still remembered the dream, how they'd pulled at his arms and legs and replaced them with a choo choo train and a bottle and a stuff snakey and some long blocks. How the toys had opened his chest open and replaced everything inside with fluff and toy cars, turning him into just another t'ing. So the under ground place was nice.

Except… he'd taken a nappy and when he'd woken up he'd discovered he was back in the first place, before he'd met his family, and he'd had to escape! And when he had daddy had shown him the dollies that would replace him and Tommy if they weren't good!

After that he'd finally gotten a chance to see Tommy but daddy and mommy didn't let him get close and he'd been so upset he'd… he'd… he'd hit mommy. Like a bad baby. And mommy's glasses had come off and daddy had taken him to the kitchen and he'd hated it! Daddy had fed him his bottle despite Dil not wanting any food at all and then instead of taking him upstairs to take a bath his daddy had kept him in the kitchen. On one hand Dil was thrilled with that as baths were utterly horrible. They'd recently begun to take him to the giant ocean in the bathroom; he preferred being in the sink. It was his size and so nice! Comfy! And sometimes he found foodies to lick! But they took him to the ocean and every time he desperately tried to save himself and Tommy from the giant waves and scary monsters but Tommy never listened! He didn't realize that he was in danger because Tommy was a stupid baby! Just like he didn't know how to mark his toys or know that Dil deserved everything or that he was supposed to-

But those were what bad babies thought and as such he pushed them from his mind. Because he wanted to be a good baby. He wanted to STAY. He didn't want to become a t'ing or have a monkey mommy or daddy. He just…

He just wanted Tommy.

He wanted his brother to hug him and play with him and make him feel safe.

But instead of getting a bath in the big ocean daddy had given him a bath in the sink which was a lot better and Dil didn't mind that… except daddy thought him not screaming and thrashing meant he was having fun so he took too long giving him his bath! Dil could feel himself getting sleepy but he knew he had to stay awake! Had to find Tommy and tell his brother he was so sorry and get him to agree to be his brother forever and ever and ever.

So he'd stay a wake.

Stay awake.

Stay…

"Finally," Stu muttered to himself, shoulders slumping in relief. It had taken him 2 hours but after a bottle and a soothing bath FINALLY Dil had gone to sleep. Considering how active he'd been all day Stu wasn't surprised that Dil had gone down a bit earlier than normal but still it would have been nice if he could have dropped of a touch later. Wrapping him up in a kitchen towel Stu slowly made his way up the stairs, tiptoeing into the boys' room-

-and found Didi rocking a sleeping Tommy back and forth, tears running down her cheeks. She was clinging to their son like he was the last life preserver on the Titantic and when she'd looked at him it had been with such sorrow his heart clenched.

It took about 10 minutes for him to get Didi to set Tommy down in his bed and the promise that they'd only be right outside the hall before he could finally wrap his arms around her and let her cry on his shoulder, telling him everything that happened.

"How did we let this happen, Stu?"

"We had a new baby," he said, trying to justify things and knowing he was failing utterly and completely. "Dil is such a handful-"

"And as a result Tommy put himself to bed. He began to cry when I came in because he was so shocked I actually was going to spend time with him…" She shook and Stu rubbed her back.

"This has been hard on all of us," he whispered. "And… yeah, we've made a lot of mistakes. But we're going to make this right."

"Not soon enough, Stu. Look at tonight. How soon did it take you to forget about Tommy?"

"Dil-"

"And it comes back to him," Didi said with a sigh. "I love both our sons, Stu… but we have to remember we actually have two of them. I don't care how easy Tommy is... we can't just keep pushing him aside because Dil cries a little! We have to love them both equally. Because we just took Tommy for granted and now he breaks down when I show him a bit of love. And Dil thinks he can just scream and we'll do whatever he wants and that's not healthy and-"

"I was going to say Dil knocked off your glasses and I was afraid you'd bump into something."

"…oh." Didi pulled back a bit, head lowered and shoulders slumped. "Right."

"Listen… we at least know what the problem is and we are going to fix it. Now, I know tomorrow was my time with Tommy but maybe you should-"

Didi though shook her head no. "Its your turn, Stu. I'm not going to torture you by not letting you see Tommy." He let out a sigh of relief. He didn't want to admit it to her but… his own nightmares were making him fear if he didn't do something soon he'd lose Tommy forever. He had horrible visions of Tommy as a teen, refusing to say a word to him, before leaving when he was 18 and never coming back. Scoffing at the idea because why should he make time when Stu never did. 'Cats in the cradle and the silver spoon'. " It would do no good if he thinks only I care about him. Just like I don't want to focus on Tommy and make Dil think I've abandoned him. Then we're just repeating the same mistake. We have to find a balance and… and that means that tomorrow is your turn."

"Thank you," Stu said, letting out a small yawn. "And now I think I'm going to go to bed. Last night still has me worn down."

"Stu?" Didi suddenly said. "I think we shouldn't have Tommy and Dil alone in the same room."

"Why not?"

"Well, we aren't the only ones who are losing sleep because Dil won't stop crying. In fact it was rather cruel of us to keep Tommy up when he needs just as much sleep as Dil. This is messing up his sleep schedule and he doesn't understand what is going on. For him suddenly it went from him being the only one to cry to this new baby waking him up all the time…"

"What should we do?" Stu asked.

"I think we should move Dil into your father's room… just for tonight. Honestly we should have kept him in our room for the first few months…"

"We thought it made sense. Tommy or Dil cries and we can take care of them both." Stu winced. "Except… we never really did that, did we?"

"No," Didi said sadly. It had been so easy to miss… the number of times that she changed Tommy's diaper in the morning, thinking that he'd just made a big mess… only to now see she'd forgotten to change him while dealing with Dil and left him to fall back to sleep in a dirty itchy diaper. How he'd gulped down his breakfast because he'd missed part of a meal because Didi got distracted with Dil. Always second place. "Tommy deserves a decent night's sleep. I'd say put Tommy in your dad's bed but I don't want to confuse him. Dil is too young so he won't even really notice. We can turn on the baby monitor and shut the door… and hopefully let Tommy get a decent night's sleep for once."

"Right… good idea."

And it was. While Didi and Stu were woken up several times during the night by Dil fussing, either for normal reasons like a hungry belly or a dirty diaper or (unbeknownst to them) another nightmare about him being turned into a toy or Angelica or something else that was horrible (such as when he'd dreamed that after taking a poopie he'd turned INTO poopie and been thrown away… which had caused him a rather big terror when he'd woken up and tried to resist using his diapie and then when he finally had thought he was melting), Tommy was never woken up and thus was rather well rested when he began to stir and found his father, who'd given up getting back to sleep at 6 am, sitting in the room just watching him.

"Hey champ!" Stu said happily when he saw Tommy open his eyes. "Morning buddy!"

Tommy looked at his father before remembering how he'd left him alone just to take care of Dil… again. Thus rather than get excited like he might normally be at the sight of his daddy waiting for him Tommy instead shifted and wiggled his right shoulder at his father. He should have given him and mommy the old shoulder all through the day but he'd thought maybe it was working when mommy spent the day with him… but he'd been wrong and he wouldn't make the same mistake again.

Stu's own shoulders slumped as Tommy remained utterly silent, refusing to even give him a smile, let alone one of his happy coos or giggles that always warmed his heart. No, Tommy just laid there, exactly as Didi had warned him, staring him down with a sullen little look, the only real signs of life being his breathing and the weird shoulder wiggle he was doing.

But he refused to let that get him down and as such Stu picked Tommy up, holding him high in the air just as he would have any other day. "Alright, so we're going to get you changed and sneak in a quick breakfast and then we're heading out! We have a big day ahead of us!"

Tommy just stared down at him. No delight. No waving his arms or kicking his little feet. Just… staring.

Stu carried him over to the changing table and removed Tommy's pajamas before changing his diaper, taking a moment to give him a little tickle.

Tommy couldn't help the giggle that burst from his lips. He was ticklish! It wasn't his fault. But the moment his father was done he stopped laughing. Stopped smiling. Because all he could think about was how as soon as Dilly woke up daddy would forget all his promises and leave Tommy on his own.

So instead he let out a little sigh before thinking about happier things. Like how he was sure he'd see his friends again today and they'd promised to help him out with the old shoulder. Or how he'd thought of a new adventure that would involve Reptar that would be really fun! Or how he'd had such a nice sleep… the best in ages and ages! He hadn't slept so good since he was a baby baby and called it 'night night time'! He'd dreamed about the nice lady… he hadn't seen her in forever but she'd held him and told him it would be okay and that everyone DID love him. And could he please, for once, NOT sneak out when G'andpa Lou took a nap?

Stu grimaced at how Tommy instantly went from giggling to quiet the moment he stopped tickling him. He wanted to wiggle his fingers against his son's belly again, just to hear that sound once more… but he knew it was wrong. It was forcing Tommy to feel things he didn't actually feel.

Even if Stu feared he might never hear Tommy laugh again.

Getting him dressed Stu paused to grab the diaper bag that sat near the door before quietly tiptoeing down to the kitchen. Didi was still sleeping and he'd left her a note letting her know that he was heading out early with Tommy and Dil had fallen asleep about an hour ago meaning he hopefully had another 45 minutes to an hour before the little guy woke up ready to face the day.

So it was a breakfast of Reptar Cereal for the two of them (and a bottle for Tommy while he had some coffee) before Stu made his way out the door, taking a confused Tommy with him. Where were he and daddy going? Weren't Chuckie and Phil and Lil coming over? Why were they leaving so early? And without Dil. Shouldn't Dil be coming with them? Mommy and daddy always took Dil everywhere!

What was going on?

As Tommy considered all this Stu slid into the driver's seat… and realized he had no idea where he and Tommy were going. He'd said they were going to have a big fun day but now that he thought of it he couldn't think of what they should DO. It didn't feel right to just go to the park or the toy store, being far too small. And, Stu admitted, he feared that he would take Tommy someplace and his son wouldn't react and he'd waste his chance to show him a wonderful day.

"What the heck are you going to do now, Stu?" he muttered to himself, realizing he had nothing. "Oh brother."

He stopped.

"Hey…" he said slowly, smiling.

He might not know what to do to fix things between him and Tommy but there was something who might…

~MC~MC~MC~

"Mr. Pickles?"

"Yes Sandra?"

"Your brother is here to see you."

Drew let out a sigh. "Great," he muttered, making sure at least not to hit the intercom button. "Probably here to beg for money. Probably blew something up or finally realized that having two kids and no insurance is lunacy!" Drew took a moment, taking several calming breaths before he pressed the intercom button. "Show him in."

'Be nice,' he mentally told himself. 'Be nice. Help him out. Don't be rude… only gloat a little. Be-'

Any thought of harassing his brother or mocking him died a swift death when the door opened.

Stu was a wreck. Bags under his eyes. Clothing wrinkled. He was trying to smile but it was just so forced. And it wasn't just from being tired… there was something else there that made Drew feel like an utter monsters for even CONSIDERING gloating about Stu showing up: a lack of hope. It was like someone had taken every bit of joy and excitement his little brother had ever had and crushed it in their fist before letting it sprinkle down to their feet. Something… something had broken Stu.

And for the first time in a VERY long time… Drew wanted to be there for his little brother and help him. No strings attached. No demands. No cockiness or sense of victory. Just the deep desire to fix whatever had broken in his brother.

"Sit down," he said gently, standing up placing a hand on Stu's arm. His brother smiled at that and while Drew felt a bit of warmth at that he wished the smile had been far bigger and brighter. Once Stu did so Drew set about dragging his chair over, though he paused when he looked over at his nephew who was currently on Stu's lap.

Tommy had always been one of the most content babies Drew had ever seen. Just always looking about with wonder at the world… but not grasping and struggling to claim it all. Oh, his nephew had an adventurous soul, Drew could tell from how he fearlessly wandered about any place he visited, but it wasn't like a lot of kids who wanted to get into mischief or grab everything that caught their eye. Tommy just seemed to enjoy observing the world. Being a part of it. When he giggled and laughed it was with raw unfiltered joy that so many people in the world had forgotten existed. But when he was just sitting and watching there was still a sense of peace to him. It was rare for Drew to see Tommy upset and when he was it was the normal baby problems; dirty diaper, hungry, scared by something. Angelica hadn't been like that… she was a far more fussy baby, wanting attention and cuddles. Tommy though was almost… zen-like at times.

Which made the sight of him now make Drew feel a sense of dread.

Tommy wasn't sitting up straight on Stu's lap, twisting his head about as he normally would. Nor was he asleep, little eyes shut and mouth puckered up as he bonelessly laid in a heap across Stu's lap. No, Tommy was just kind of… leaning against Stu, utterly listless, staring straight ahead with a look of… well, Drew didn't know quite how to describe it. Not for a baby. He'd seen so many emotions on Angelica's face, from bored to excited to angry to delighted to sad… but the best way to describe Tommy was 'resigned'. It rather reminded Drew of some of his customers when he'd told them they simply didn't have the budget to do some big renovation for their business and after a bit of hemming and hawing they'd slouch in their chairs and silently give up their dream.

That was how Tommy looked. Like someone had taken his dreams and quietly said they'd never come true.

And that was just wrong.

"Is everything okay, Stu?" Drew asked as he went and filled up a spare cup with coffee, handing it to his brother. "Is… is Tommy okay?"

"No," Stu said softly only to speak up a bit louder when Drew stiffened at that. "I mean… don't worry, Tommy's fine! Healthy baby. Dil too."

Drew sighed in relief at that. They never talked about it and Stu probably thought his brother had forgotten all about it… but that day when Didi had gone into labor early had been one of the scariest days of Drew's life up until Angelica and the rest of the kids had been lost in the woods. He hadn't even been able to see Tommy, the boy had been so small and weak, but he'd known from the shattered look on Stu's face that things had been bad.

He'd never told Stu, knowing his brother was a proud man, but Drew was the reason why the family hadn't been bankrupted caring for Tommy. Drew had quietly told the hospital to bill him for Tommy's treatments; even Charlotte had been moved. He knew that Stu had thought that Char had taken a business call after the news and accepted that; in reality Charlotte had begun calling every contact she had, seeking out experts across the country to give their advice on how to save Tommy's life. Because while they never talked about it… the doctors had given Tommy only a 30% chance.

"He's our nephew," Charlotte had told him after one such call and for the first time in ages Drew had seen tears in his wife's eyes. "Angelica and him are going to be the best of friends. I won't let him suffer, not on my watch."

"Except…" Stu said, pulling Drew from his thoughts and causing him to begin to feel some dread again, "just because you're healthy doesn't mean you're happy."

"What are you talking about?" Drew asked.

His brother let out a sigh. "We've been neglecting Tommy. Really… really bad." He reached down and ran his hand along Tommy's head and Drew was struck at how Tommy stiffened for a moment… and then nothing. He didn't lean into the touch. Didn't coo. Didn't smile. Just… sat there. It was like he was asleep with his eyes open. "Dil has been… well, you know, you've heard it. And I'm sure Angelica has told you all about it."

She had. Loudly and brashly. How horrible Dil was. How he was always crying, making it hard to do anything. Drew had been too focused on the overtime he'd been pulling at the time but now could see that it was very likely that Dil had colic. Angelica had gone through that and it had been a nightmare until they'd figured out what formula to put her on. Tommy he knew hadn't (he'd been put on special formula for nearly 6 months), so Stu and Didi hadn't been prepared for what their newest son would put them through.

'I need to bring that up to Stu and Didi,' Drew suddenly though. 'I don't know if they've taken Dil to the doctor… they might not even know that the poor little guy is hurting!'

So Drew merely nodded, making a mental note to talk to his brother about that, and Stu continued on. "We honestly didn't mean to… we just were so focused on Dil and Tommy is just so low maintenance…" Stu sighed, shaking his head. "No, I can't make excuses. Not anymore. We were wrong and we were so unfair to him. Even after they all got lost in the woods… it only took a few weeks for us to completely forget that it wasn't just Dil who got lost but Tommy as well."

"But you realized it," Drew said gently.

"Yeah… but not in the best way."

"What do you mean?"

And so Stu told him about the nightmares he and Didi had suffered through. Didi dreaming that she'd discovered Tommy dead in the playpen and that no one cared. Stu's nightmare of Tommy in the incubator, struggling to survive, and how he was helpless all over again. Drew watched as his brother sucked back his tears and all he could do was place his hand on his knee.

"They were just dreams-"

"No… they were warnings. After Didi had that nightmare she went in and Tommy… he was different. He always greeted us so warming, with a smile and a laugh. Even in the hospital… when I first saw him and Didi together he was smiling. I know babies can't smile just after they are born but he was smiling. And now he's always reaching for us and looking for a cuddle or a kiss… or he was." Stu looked down at Tommy who just was staring straight ahead, not reacting at all. Utterly still. "But that night he just laid there. And when Didi actually sat down next to him he was so hesitant." Stu sighed, rolling his head towards the ceiling so he missed Tommy looking up at him, tiny little brow crinkling. "She spent the whole day with him while I dealt with Dil and she said things were almost like they were back to normal. He had a little panic attack when she went to get some stuff to make bread but otherwise he was real good… until Dil knocked off Didi's glasses and I went to help her." Stu looked back at his brother and Tommy quickly tilted his head back down so Stu didn't see he was staring. "You… you know how blind she is without her glasses. I just didn't want her to get hurt!"

"I… I know," Drew said, feeling horrible that his brother was practically BEGGING him to absolve him of his envisioned sins.

"It was only for a few seconds," Stu whispered, haunted by the events of the previous night. "But the next thing we know Tommy is gone. He crawled up the stairs and went to his room. He had a dirty diaper and hadn't gotten his evening bottle or a bath or anything. And Didi…" Stu's voice cracked. "She found him looking at a picture book and then he put himself to bed. He thought… he thought we weren't going to put him to bed." Stu's voice cracked. "My son thinks we don't love him."

"Stu," Drew whispered.

"I'm losing him. We're losing him. We messed up and he won't ever trust us again and I can't fix this. I can't fix anything-"

"Stu," Drew said again, reaching over and giving him a little shake. "It's okay Stu."

"I dreamed about mom."

Drew froze.

The Pickles brothers never talked about their mother. It just hurt too much, the wound too fresh. She'd died just after Angelica had been born and Drew knew that it bugged Stu that she'd hadn't gotten to see Tommy. They'd named Tommy after her father, the guys' grandfather, and Drew just KNEW that Trixie would have loved him as much as she loved Angelica. The fact that Stu had been willing to name Dil 'Trixie' if he'd been born a girl was a pretty major step forward though…

"She… she told me how Didi and I were failing Tommy but there was time to make it up." Now the tears were falling, rolling down his cheek, and Drew saw one fall on Tommy's head, the boy reaching up and touching it, looking at in confusion. "But I don't know how. Today is my day with him… just me and my brave little Champ… but I don't know what to do. How to make it up to him. That's why…"

Drew felt a watery smile form on his lips at that. The words were unsaid but he knew what they were. "That's why I came to see you". Because Stu needed his big brother.

So he didn't rush to speak. He actually thought about what his brother had said. What he was asking Drew's help with. He thought about what his brother had done and what he wanted to do. And most of all he thought about Tommy. What he needed more than anything.

And that's when he had the answer.

"He doesn't trust you," Drew said, making sure to keep his voice as kind as possible. Still, Stu winced at that. "And I don't think… you trust yourself." His brother was now looking at him, confused. "You don't believe that you can fix this. Think that you'll mess things up. So you both need to regain that trust." He took a deep breath, knowing this would be a hard pitch. "You need to take Tommy back to the woods."

"…what?"

"That day… that was the worst day of both your lives. He must have been scared out of his mind. Not knowing where you were… crying out for you and Didi, wishing you'd find him and keep him safe-"

"You don't have to remind me!" Stu exclaimed in misery but Drew pressed on.

"And you… it was horrible for you two as well. So you need to slay that monster. Show Tommy that you are there for him. That you are going to protect him. And show yourself that you will never let him down again." He paused, a thought occurring to him and he reached over and grabbed his phone, punching in one of the interoffice numbers. "Hey Bill? It's Drew. Listen, do you still have that baby sling you were looking to sell? The big one?"

"Yeah, down in my car."

"You in your office?"

"Uh huh."

"Listen, I'm sending my brother over to you. Can you show it to him." He smiled as he looked down at Tommy who was staring now openly at Drew. "I think it might work perfectly."

"Drew…" Stu said softly when he hung up the phone. "I-"

"I'm going to buy it for Tommy. An early Christmas present." He reached over and plucked his nephew from his lap. "Go talk with Bill. Four offices down to the right."

"Drew… I…"

"I'll watch Tommy. Go take a look."

Stu, for the first time since he'd arrived looking relieved, quickly got up and hurried out of the room only to poke his head back in. "Daddy will be RIGHT back champ!"

And with that he hurried out, leaving Drew cradling his nephew.

"You know… I don't think I've spent that much time with you," Drew said softly as he began to walk around his office, rubbing Tommy's back. He'd done this with Angelica a few times, when he'd been forced once to come in and pull an all-nighter. He'd reasoned that she would be up anyway so he might as well take her with him so Charlotte could get some sleep. It had actually made the long nights go by so quickly. "I'm sorry about that. Not very good of an uncle I guess. Your cousin Angelica is always over to your house but I can't remember the last time we had you over… when Angelica started preschool I think." He smiled as he continued to just amble about his office, gently cradling the 1 year old against his shoulder and chest. "But I should have done more and I'm really sorry about that. Sometimes I'm so focused on giving your cousin and your aunt the life I want them to have I forget that life isn't worth it without moments like this."

He finally pulled Tommy away so he could look the little boy in the eye, watching him carefully even as he made sure to hold in such a way that Tommy knew he was perfectly safe.

"I know it must be really confusing right now. You went from being the only one in the house to having to share everything. Except it sounds like your mama and dada haven't been that good about making sure everything is fair." Tommy looked up at him and Drew swore that the baby nodded his head. Probably his imagination. "But listen… they love you so very much. They wanted you for a long time. I think that's why they had Dil too… because you were such a wonderful son they wanted even more of that kind of love. And I know it doesn't seem like it… but it will get better. Dil will settle in and he'll learn. You two might fight. Sometimes you might hate each other. But that's only because sometimes you can love someone so much it makes you angry. But in the end… he'll need you Tommy. And you'll need him. He'll need you to protect him. You'll need him to remember to have fun. Just like your parents will need you as much as you need them."

Tommy licked his lips before, ever so slowly, he reached out for Drew.

And the elder of the Pickles brothers was more than happy to give his nephew a hug.