"Oh Dilly what's wrong?" Didi asked, walking into Lou's bedroom where Dil's crib had been temporarily placed. The infant was sobbing up a storm, thrashing about and arching his back as he screamed. "Someone has had a rough night, haven't they?" she said gently as she picked up Dil, rocking him gently. "Hmmm… are you hungry? Or a wet diaper maybe?"
Dil wasn't hungry. He was tired and he was scared and he wanted…
"TOMMY!" Dil screamed as his mommy checked his diapee. He sniffed and hiccupped, everything aching considering how long and often he'd been crying, trying to get SOMEONE to get him out of his crib and take him to his brother. Dil was used to rough nights; ever since he'd arrived from the Other Place he'd always woken up cranky. His tummy hurt a lot and the only thing that really made him feel better was a nice poopie… only that then left him in a messy diaper and he didn't like that either. So he cried when he was hungry, went to sleep, only to wake up in pain and needing comfort, and when the pain finally went away he had a messy diapee and then he was hungry again! It was a nightscare…
No. Not a nightscare. What had happened last night… those were nightscares.
When he'd fallen asleep while taking his bath he'd dreamed that he was in the playpen with Tommy. He'd been so happy because he'd finally found his brother, to finally be able to apologize… only then other Dils had shown up. Angry Dils who grabbed onto Tommy and refused to let go. At first it was because they wanted Tommy to themselves but then they decided that NO ONE would get Tommy if they couldn't have him themselves. His brother had cried out for help and Dil had tried to wiggle his way over to Tommy but he'd been too late and Tommy had been torn to pieces by the bad Dils! Tommy had screamed in pain, asking why Dil wasn't helping him as each Bad Dil had torn him apart and Dil couldn't do anything…
When he'd woken up he'd begun to scream for Tommy, wanting to make sure it had only been a dream, but mommy and daddy had come and thought it was normal night night time things. Dil had finally calmed down, realizing if mommy and daddy were okay that must mean Tommy was okay… and fallen asleep again. And then he'd dreamed about the forest again only this time the monkeys wanted Tommy because the baby monkey saw how nice Tommy was to Dil and wanted Tommy to be his brother. Dil had tried to tell them that his brother was his… but the monkeys had taken Tommy away and Dil had been left sobbing, all alone as it rained and the sky went boom boom. And then the wolf had come and told him he had to live in the forest forever and ever! That no one wanted a naughty baby like him so he had to stay with the scary wolf.
He'd woken up again and cried and again mommy and daddy had come and soothed him… only this time Dil had realized what was going to happen: he was going to close his eyes and have another nightscare! And that had made him cry and cry but mommy and daddy didn't understand that he wanted Tommy…needed Tommy. Because Tommy would protect him…
And then he'd cried so hard he'd fallen asleep and dreamed that Philip and Lilip took him to Yucky's house and told him he had to live there. He'd tried to scramble away but they'd shut the door and when he'd looked out he'd seen mommy and daddy and Tommy drive away, laughing and cheering because the 'bad naughty baby was gone forevers!' and Dil had banged on the windows, begging them to not leave him, but he'd been left behind. And Yucky had refused to give him any toys or a bottle or change his diapee and just left him to scream and cry, messy and cold and so alone…
And so it had went, through the entire night. Sometimes it was Dil who suffered, like when he'd dreamed that people from the hopsickle had come and demanded him back, saying he was broken. And they'd placed him on a cold table and pulled out tools and begun to cut him open to remove all the stuff that made him Dilly because 'Dilly is a bad baby!'. They pulled out blocks and gears that let him love his bottle or remember his favorite toys and tossed them away. Other times it was Tommy… and that was worse. One nightscare had seen mommy and daddy find him and Tommy in the woods but Dil hadn't given him the blankie and Tommy had turned into an icy cube and when mommy hugged him Tommy had broken into pieces. And mommy had cried and daddy had said it was all Dil's fault and he begged Tommy to come back-
But finally… FINALLY… it was day time. And that meant he could have a new diapee and get a bottle and then mommy would take him down to the play pen and he'd get to see Tommy! And he'd tell him he was sorry and wanted to be a good baby and everything would be fixed! It would be! He just knew it.
"Oh Dil, I just wish I knew what was wrong," Didi said as she carried Dil back to his room to get him change. The baby began to kick and fuss when he saw where they were, reaching out toward's Tommy crib. "I'm sorry, sweetie, but Tommy's gone," Didi said as she took Dil to the changing table, knowing that Tommy and Stu were out for their fun day. She smiled when Dil actually went still and allowed her to change his diaper, not realizing the reason WHY Dil wasn't thrashing any more was he had been struck still with fear.
"Tommy… go go?" Dil murmured.
Didi glanced at Tommy's crib and shook her head. They really should get him a big boy bed. He was too old for the crib as it was. And that made her smile because that could be another special thing her and Stu could do for him; they could take him to a store to get some ideas on what he liked and Stu could make a new bed for Tommy! Just for him, just as he liked it!
"I should really get rid of that thing. Not like we need it any more." Didi finished changing Dil's diaper and kissed his belly.
Dil though began to shake his head. "T-Tommy go go?" he whimpered. No… this had to a nightscare! Another one! Mommy… mommy hadn't gotten rid of his Tommy! Dil needed his brother! Who would play with him and take care of him when they were alone and make silly faces when he was scared? Who would show him things and help him learn how to be a big baby? "T-Tommy," Dil pleaded, wishing his brother would just come back.
~MC~MC~MC~
Tommy was one very confused baby.
Once more his usual routine had been thrown completely off. For the last few weeks it had been the same thing: Dil would wake him up, screaming his little head off and mommy would change him and take him downstairs. Sometimes Tommy would wait for her to come up but there were days where it just took too long so he'd escape his crib and make his way to the kitchen, even if it meant that he had a sore bottom because his diaper was wet and mommy had forgotten to change him. Either way he'd get there and he'd get breakfast but his bottle would never be the right temperature and it would make his tummy rumble and his tongue taste yucky. Then mommy would dress him and Dil and put them in the playpen. What happened then depended on Dil's mood. Sometimes he would just steal whatever toy Tommy wanted to play with and Tommy would be stuck looking out the window. Other times Dil would decided that TOMMY was his toy and he'd yank on his arms so he could suck on his fingers or bop him on the head.
That was why Tommy had decided that he was done paying attention to Dil. He was a bad naughty baby and Tommy wasn't going to play with him no more. Same with mommy and daddy. They ignored him so he'd ignore them!
Except… yesterday for the most part mommy hadn't ignored him. And Dil hadn't hit him once because he hadn't seen Dil until that evening… when mommy and daddy had forgotten all about him again because they only loved Dilly.
Mommy had tried to explain but Tommy didn't listen. It just hurt too much and he was tired of hurting. He was a big boy and didn't need his mommy or daddy anymore. So he'd decided that he was going to do everything for himself…
…and then daddy had greeted him when he woke up, changed his diaper and given him breakfast and they'd gone to see Uncle Drew.
That was when things got REALLY weird.
Tommy hadn't spent much time with Uncle Drew. He mostly just brought Angelica around and gave her stuff. But Tommy's daddy had been upset and talked to Uncle Drew about Tommy and… it sounded like he realized that he wasn't being a nice daddy at all. But Tommy was sure that wasn't right because Dil loved daddy and daddy only cared about Dil.
Then daddy had gone off but before Tommy could get upset Uncle Drew had begun to carry him around, telling him that he was sorry for not spending more time with him. Tommy had just stared at him and while it felt nice to be cuddled close, reminding him of when he'd been a baby baby and everyone loved to hug him and snuggle with him… Tommy had refused to give in. To show that he cared. Because he knew it wouldn't last.
Which was why he found it odd when Uncle Drew rubbed his head and found several of the bumps Dil had left and sucked in a breath.
"Got it!" Stu said, coming back into the office. "And yeah, this is going to be great!"
"Hey Stu?" Drew said. "Come here."
"What is it?" he asked, walking over, smiling at the sight of Drew cradling Tommy.
"Put your hand here… gently…" Stu did so but Tommy still winced as his daddy touched one of his booboos.
"What… oh my…" Stu leaned in and for the first time saw the small bumps and faint bruises on Tommy's head. It looked like a patchwork of yellows and purples! If you didn't put your eye almost against his skin you wouldn't see them but- "Drew, I swear, I didn't-"
"I know you didn't," he assured his brother. "You'd never hurt Tommy." Drew paused. "Stu… Angelica has told us a few times that Dil likes to hit people. She had a bruise on her arm a week ago and said Dil did it with his bottle when he tried to take Cynthia. We thought she was just making up stories, like how when she gets in trouble she says the babies made her do it. But… are you sure Dil isn't hitting Tommy?"
Stu swallowed. "i…" The words of his mother in his dream came back… her scolding Dil for hitting Tommy. "I think he has. But he's just a baby-" He looked down at Tommy who was staring at him… before glancing back at the floor, letting out a sigh and all at once Stu knew he couldn't use that excuse. "-but so is Tommy," he said, shoulders slumped. "God… if it were the other way around we wouldn't put up with it. Yeah, he's older but… no wonder he doesn't want to be around Dil anymore." He thought of the morning before, when Dil had wanted to hug Tommy… but his eldest son had just sat there, refusing to acknowledge Dil even existed. If someone spent their days bashing him on the head he'd be upset! Especially if everyone kept forcing him to be around the basher!
"I'm sorry Stu. I just noticed-"
"No," he said, cutting him off. "I needed to know this. Didi and I have made a lot of mistakes with Dil. We constantly run to him, we focus solely on him… and now not only is Tommy feeling neglected but actually getting hurt." Stu collapsed back in the chair. "God, no wonder he doesn't trust us. Dil hurts him and we don't even notice… or we coddle Dil while Tommy suffers." He stared at the ceiling, wondering how many times when Tommy had been fussy it had been because he was hurt and Stu didn't even pay attention! And what if something bad had truly happened? What if Dil had poked Tommy's eye out or actually cracked his skull. Babies had soft heads, he knew that… it couldn't be good for him to get hit all the time! Didi had screamed the first time Tommy bumped his head on the table but now they just smiled when Dil smacked him around? "We're never going to make this right."
"No, you will," Drew assured him. "You just have to keep working. No one is perfect…" he sighed, adjusting Tommy a bit, the baby glancing at his father before turning away and, for some reason, wiggling his shoulder. "Charlotte and I have made a ton of mistakes with Angelica."
"I don't-"
"We did. Charlotte and I have talked… she's going to take a bigger role in disciplining her. I cave too easily. But yeah, we made mistakes. Pop messed up with us. His parents didn't notice Aunt Miriam bullying him. You just have to keep working on it." He took a breath. "Speaking off… what are you feeding Dil?"
"What do you mean?"
"Stu… I think I know why Dil is having so many problems at night."
Soon Stu had another reason to feel like a failure.
~MC~MC~MC~
"Geez Deed, that… just…" Betty searched for the right words before finally giving up. "I'm sorry. Anything I want to say just comes off as me belittling you and… I can't imagine what it must have been like having that dream." She looked down at her coffee, trying to place herself in Didi's shoes. Dreaming that your child was dead, neglected and unloved because you'd forgotten about them. She suddenly saw two little skeletons in matching outfits lying in the playpen and shuddered before taking a drink of her coffee; it was only because she was a good friend that she didn't run home and hug Phil and Lil tight. "I think I might need to Irish this up a bit," she muttered, getting up and walking over to where she knew Lou kept his… emergency rations.
"If it had just been the dream I could have managed," Didi said softly, idly stirring her coffee. "But it made me begin noticing things I've been missing… I've been a horrible mother."
"Don't say that. You're a great mom!"
"I am a great mother to my one son," Didi said. "The problem is I have two."
"Hey, these things happen!" Betty said. "You get another kid and you have to split your focus!" She sat back down and sipped her coffee, letting out a small groan of delight. She did love a good cup of joe. "You did that…"
"Except Stu and I didn't split our focus," Didi said softly. "We just took everything and directed it towards Dil." She took a shuddery breath. "I didn't notice it at the time but there were so many days where Tommy tried to get my attention, wanting just a scrap of love and I couldn't even give him that. I told him to hold on, that Dil needed me… TOMMY needed me too, Betty! My special little guy needed me and I was never there. And I don't think he's ever going to forgive me."
"Aw, come on now!" Betty said, reaching over and smack Didi on the shoulder, nearly causing her to topple over. "Tommy loves ya! And ya love him! Everyone can see it!"
Didi though wasn't convinced. "Give me an example."
"Alright… when ya won that game show and the pup rushed away from us ta give ya a hug! He couldn't want to hold you again!"
"Okay."
"And you two are always together… ya took him to show off to your class didn't ya?"
"I did."
"So see!" Betty leaned back in her chair. "Nothin' ta worry about!"
Didi though merely looked at her friend. "Now tell me an example from after Dil was born."
Betty opened her mouth… before slowly letting it click shut. She sat up straight, began to fidget… and finally just looked away, unable to meet her friend's eyes.
"Tommy was my miracle. I was so scared I was going to lose him. And now I've completely forgotten about him." She fought back the tears that threatened to come. "And then there is Dil! I'm doing the exact opposite to him! Tommy is so independent, always wanting to explore and see the world! My brave baby. But Dil… he demands everything. He screams and fusses and I run to him because I want him to be happy but now I worry that all I've taught him is he can get whatever he wants so long as he cries hard enough." She shuddered. "I had a dream last night…"
"Tommy," Didi said, holding onto the phone, pacing up and down the kitchen. "I was… wondering if you were going to come home this weekend." "Why?" her son said and even though his voice was childish and squeaky in her dream she knew he was in his 20s. "Well… it is your birthday. I thought… maybe we could-" "MA!"
Didi flinched at the bellow coming from the other room before focusing on the phone call. "I'd like to see you, sweetie." "Yeah… I don't think I can. I'm… busy?" She didn't believe him for a second and Tommy was doing nothing to try and convince her. "In fact I really should wrap this up…" "but I just reached you!" Didi said desperately. "I've left messages all week-" It had been years since they last saw each other, ever since Tommy had left on… on his 18 "MA!" came the scream from the living room.
"Listen, I got to go. But hey, maybe wait till I call next time? Becky and I are trying to get Greg to sleep for more than 6 hours and your calls wake him up." "Greg… Tommy… do you have a son? And Becky… did… did you get married-" "MA!" "Bye," Tommy said and all Didi heard was the dial tone. No, 'I love you' or 'talk to you soon'. Just a bye as in 'take the hint old woman'. She swallowed, slowly setting the phone back into the cradle before walking into the living room. There, lazing on the couch, was Dil. In his early twenties but still wearing the same one piece pjs and with the same jelly-bean shaped bald head. "FINALLY!" Dil screeched. "I can't reach the remote! And I'm hungry! And I want you to stare at me but not directly at me-" He slapped a nipple on a beer bottle and began to guzzle it before he farted. "Ugh… and a change-"
"Come on now," Betty said. "You won't let Dil end up like that."
"How can you be so sure? Tommy already doesn't trust me anymore… I know he's slipping away. And with Dil… every time he wants something we rush to him and Stu already admitted he pretty much always gives Tommy's toys to him. Do you know that night I walked into their room and found Tommy's side completely bare? Because we just give into Dil's demands." Didi fretted. "Now I have one son who hates me and another who expects me to give him everything he wants-"
"Deeds, if there is anyone that can fix this mess its you. I don't doubt it for a second." She grinned and reached over, giving Didi a squeeze on the shoulder. "Now… why don't we get out a pen and some paper and make a list of things you can do ta make this all better?"
"Well… I suppose that is a good idea…"
"Darn tootin' it is! Now, we'll do a Tommy side and a Dil side. Get the one ta trust ya again and the other to realize he can't always scream and expect to get what he wants…"
As this was going on Dil Pickles half lay/half sat on his purple pillow in the playpen… and looked about with nervous eyes at all the toys around him. His mommy had thought that he'd like to be able to play but at the moment Dil was having a baby panic attack.
"Toys… toys…" he whimpered, hoping that the teddy bears and Reptar dolls were nice toys… and not mean ones that thought he was a bad baby and would try and turn him into one of them. Glancing away he decided maybe it would be safe to play with some blocks… only for his little baby brain to suddenly see his arm made up of blocks! "Gaaaaa!" he exclaimed before pressing his hands to his mouth, eyes darting about hoping the other toys hadn't heard him. Maybe… if he was really quiet… they'd leave him alone…
And that's when he saw that Philip and Lilip were taking some brown toy… which kind of looked like his head… and began RIPPING ITS EYES AND NOSE OFF!
Dil clapped his hands over his own nose and whimpered.
"What's wrong with Dil?" Lil asked as she played with the Mr. Potato Head Doll.
"Whadda mean?" Phil asked.
"He's more quiets than normal."
"…and that's a bad thing?"
"Nope!" Lil said with a smile. "I like him better like that!"
Dil, gathering his courage, reached out for them. "Phillip! Lillip!" They were so very, very, very far away though and he called out louder to them. They could help him! Tommy wasn't here and he didn't know why but he should have been. Tommy should have been there so Dil could say sorry, Tommy would accept, and they could go back to normal. Tommy would protect him and… uh… what had g'andma told him? He yawned, so tired for last night that his thoughts were jumbled. G'andma had said… that Dil… should take every toy? That sounded right. Yup! Dil needed to saw sorry and Tommy would say it was okay, Dil hadn't done anything wrong and he was the best baby ever! And then he'd give him every toy because he felt bad for making Dil sad and would never get upset again!
But Tommy wasn't here and that annoyed Dil but Philip and Lilip were and they could protect him!
"Uh oh," Phil said. "I think he spotted us."
"Probably wants to play with us."
Phil huffed. "More like steal all our toys and hit us like he hits Tommy!"
Lil cringed. "Do we have ta?"
"Nope and if he does hit us I'll hit'em back! Ain't my brother!"
Dil blinked at that, slowly lowering his arms. Philil and Lilip… didn't want to play with him? But… why? Everyone wanted to play with him!
"What should we do then?" Lil asked.
"Let's give him the old shoulder like Tommy is doing! Maybe then he'll go away!"
"Yeah!" Lil said, excited. So the twins turned their backed to Dil and began to play with other toys, ignoring the baby as he cried out their names and demanded they pay attention to him.
Dil wasn't happy at all. Why were they ignoring him? He was their friend! They came over all the time and he played with their toys and they'd go off with Tommy-
"Oh," Dil murmured. Even if he was a baby baby he could connect the dots (Not really… he more just drooled on the pages). Phil and Lil were TOMMY'S friends. Not his. They only spent time with him because Tommy said they had to. Dil remembered in the forest how they'd said they wanted to take him back to the hosickle and complained about helping him with his diapee and they hadn't come and got him from the monkeys Tommy had. And thinking about it the few times all of them had played together, when Dil had been willing to share his toys… it had been Tommy who had invited him to play.
Never Philip or Lilip or Chubby.
His face screwed up into a scowl the more he thought about it. Why didn't they like him? He was the baby! Everyone said how cute he was and wanted to spend time with him! Why were they ignoring him! He was like Tommy… in fact he was better than Tommy! It didn't matter that only moments earlier he'd been sad about Tommy not being there and had wished he would come back so he could apologize; now Dil was MAD! He was the baby and they were supposed to play with him and pay attention to him! That's. How. It. Worked.
"LILIP!" He screamed, kicking his little legs. "Philip!"
But the twins ignored him.
Was it because of Tommy? That was it! Dil got madder and madder, forgetting all about the nightscares and what his g'andma had told him and how much he missed Tommy and wanted to be a good baby. Because he was a good baby! And he was mad because Tommy was being greedy and taking all the babies to be his friends and they were supposed to be Dil's! They should be his friends! Not Tommy's!
"MINE!" he screamed, seizing a rattle and waving it about. "MY LILIP! MY PHILIP! MINE!"
The rattle slipped from his chubby fingers as he flailed and screeched and Dil watched as it seemed to slow down as it flew through the air, spinning end over end… just as Phil turned to look at him. Even Dil winced as it hit the little boy in the nose.
Phil gasped and took a breath to cry… only for all the babies to start when Phil and Lil's mom cried out and rushed over.
"Oh Philly willy, it's okay!" Betty said, lifting both him and his twin up and kissing them, Phil crying and causing Lil to begin sobbing in fright too. "Did you get a booboo?"
"Dil Pickles!"
Dil went still, slowly turning and seeing his mommy. But she wasn't smiling and cooing his name. She looked… angry. Like Tommy in the woods. She looked down at him and Dil sunk low in his little pillow, shifting nervously.
"We do NOT hit people," she scolded, lifting him up. "That isn't nice at all! They don't hit you, do they?"
Dil looked over at the twins and all his anger disappeared like the last drop of milk in a bottle as he saw Phil crying and Lil staring at him, clinging to her brother as he held his nose.
They… they were afraid of him.
Dil trembled.
He suddenly remembered everything. How he'd promised to be a good baby. To not hit people. To share. To make up with Tommy because he loved Tommy…
…and he'd hit Tommy's friends and tried to take them away from him.
He shook and sniffed even as Didi carried him up for a nap. Dil didn't hear his mommy apologize to Betty. Nor did he hear her tell him that he had to play nice. And he was so upset he didn't notice that she took him to his g'anpa's room where his crib still was instead of his room. No, he hiccupped before throwing back his head and sobbing. He wanted her to hug him and tell him he was wrong, that he was a good baby and he hadn't done anything naughty.
But mommy just set him down in his crib.
"No Dil," she said as he reached up. He wanted her to hold him and rock him and tell him it was okay. That he was good and hadn't done anything wrong. But his mommy didn't do that. She just shook her head and gently but firmly pried his little fingers from her sleeves. "You need a nap. You were very mean to the other babies and need to be better. No one will want to play with you if you are bad." She wagged her finger. "No more hitting. Not Phil or Lil, not Chuckie, and certainly not Tommy. If you can't do that you'll never make any friends."
And then she left.
Dil cried and cried… but she didn't come back. Every other time he'd sobbed she'd come running.
But not this time.
And he knew why.
His nightmare was coming true. Tommy was gone. No one wanted to help him. And the only ones to keep him company… were things.
"Dil…" he hiccupped, utterly miserable as he could no longer deny the truth, "…bad… baby."
~MC~MC~MC~
"Up we go, champ!" Stu said, lifting Tommy from his car seat.
Tommy looked around, taking in the trees and the dirt trail. He vaguely remembered this place… it looked familiar…
He swallowed.
The woods.
This is where he and his friends had gotten lost. Where the monkeys had tried to take them and then the scary wolf had tried to eat them! He remembered the river and the bridge and the Lizard…
Why had his daddy brought him here?
He wanted so badly to look at his father, to try and figure out why he'd brought them there… but he couldn't. he was giving his daddy the old shoulder. And, if Tommy were completely honest… he was scared that his daddy would say that they had finally decided they didn't want him anymore and were taking him to the woods to live there.
"Sorry champ but we have enough babies now with Dil," Stu said, setting Tommy down on the path and waving goodbye. "Bye!" He got in the car and drove off, Tommy leaping to his feet and trying to catch up… only for the car to stop! "What am I doing?" his daddy said, slapping his head. "Dil might want these!" He yanked off Tommy's shirt and diapee before getting in the car and driving off again, leaving Tommy standing nakey in the woods, sniffing and crying-
"Aw, its okay champ," Stu said, seeing how Tommy had began to whimper, tears in his eyes. "It's okay. Daddy has you." He reached into the back of the car and pulled out the baby carrier Drew had bought them. "Nothing to be scared about. I'm going to be right here." Tommy chanced a glance at his father as he set him down in the front seat of the car… only to blink in confusion. His father was wearing some strange black thing around his chest. It kind of looked like a blanket and a shirt all at once but also… not. Tommy forgot all about giving his daddy the old shoulder as he tilted his head, trying to puzzle out what he was seeing, only for his father to lift him up. "Alright… in we go!"
And then it suddenly made sense.
Tommy let out a little "oooooooh" as his daddy settled him inside baby sling, locking it into place so that Tommy was secure but also had the ability to wiggle and move. The baby touched the black fabric, rubbing first the parts that covered his own chest then the rest that ran to Stu's body. His little legs kicked as Stu made sure everything was in place, getting used to having Tommy's weight suddenly pressed against his body.
"See? Perfectly safe," Stu said before locking the car and beginning to walk.
Tommy looked about, amazed. He had been taken to all sorts of places in so many different ways. He'd been carried and sat in a stroller and in a car seat and on top of his daddy's shoulders… but NEVER like this! He could feel his daddy's heart beating and felt safe and protected… but he could also twist his head about and wiggle his arms and legs as much as he wanted! It was like he was walking like a big person!
"The woods are nothing to be scared of," Stu said, just as much for himself as for Tommy. He'd had so many nightmares since that night about his sons out in the woods, imagining what might have happened…
Tommy and Dil clung to each other, shivering against a tree. Every creak of the branches made them cry out, their little eyes wide with fright as they sobbed and called out for him and Didi.
Or… what could have happened…
"Mr. Pickles," the ranger said softly, backing away from the bush, "maybe you should let us get them out of there." "No, I've got it!" Stu said, relieved that they'd found the boys. "Tommy! Dil! Daddy's-" He pushed back the branches of the bush only to stare at the rotting remains of his sons, their corpses chewed on by all manner of beasts. He backed away in horror, wanting to deny it, only for Tommy's half-caved in skull to turn towards him.
"Why… why didn't you find us daddy?' he whispered.
"The woods are nothing to be scared of," Stu repeated. Technically they were on the very outskirts of the forest, walking along a well maintained trail. It had once been a rail line but the steel had long been torn out so that a trail could be put in. Not a deep and dark scary woods… in fact they passed by several joggers and a pair of mothers chatting as they power walked. "Just trees and grass and nature. You like nature, don't you?"
Tommy looked about with wide eyes, soaking in everything. This… this was just amazing! He felt like he was on a hang blider, soaring through the forest. He kicked his legs and flapped his arms and couldn't help it… he let out a squeal when his daddy suddenly rushed forward.
"Ha!" Stu said, delighting in Tommy's cheers. "Like that? How about… THIS!" He leapt over a puddle and Tommy gasped… before crying out his joy. Stu slowed down but Tommy continued to babble to himself, twisting his head to take in everything. "You know what I think? I think every week just the two of us are going to go for a walk. Just like this. One day we'll go to the park, another the beach, and sometimes we'll come back here. And when you get old enough you can walk right beside me. I'll hold your hand and teach you how to make bird calls." He reached out and wiggled his finger against Tommy's palm. "Just you and me. Not mommy or Dil. We'll find other stuff to do with them. But this… this will be Tommy and Daddy time."
Tommy blinked at that, looking at his daddy's finger, his gurgles and mumbling growing quiet. Daddy… and Tommy time? With no Dil? Just something for the two of them? Every week?
Stu let out a soft sigh. "Tommy… I know your mom and I haven't been doing a good job at being a mommy and daddy to you msince Dil came home. We made a lot of mistakes and you suffered because of them. Dil is a handful, yes, and you are so low maintenance… but that doesn't mean we should have ignored you." He began to stroke Tommy's head and the baby murmured at the sensation but still listened to his daddy's words. "I know you don't trust me champ. That I let you down. And I am… so sorry. But mommy and I? We're going to do better. We're going to be there for both you and Dil. And I promise you… we won't ever forget you again."
Tommy swallowed at that. He'd wanted to hear his daddy say that for so long. To realize that he had been ignoring Tommy. And while part of him quietly warned that daddy would forget him so Tommy should forget him first… he didn't want to.
Because he missed his daddy.
Stu choked back his tears as Tommy grasped his finger in his little hand and gave it a squeeze.
"Thanks champ," he whispered before smiling. "Now… HOLD ON!"
And Stu started to run, Tommy throwing up his hands as, for the first time in a while… he squealed in pure delight.
Maybe… maybe things were going to get better.