(AUTHOR'S NOTE: Sorry for not having done a new chapter in a while, college is getting to me when I'm almost done with this current semester. I also had to take a lot of liberties with this reinterpretation since there wasn't enough free footage found of this Billy and Mandy episode. I hope you enjoy it though)
[This episode starts with Lincoln Loud in the living room choosing to eat his favorite superhero duo branded cereal while watching TV]
TV ANNOUNCER: And so, Ace Savvy and his sidekick One Eyed Jack managed to defeat the evil Talking Trash Eater and Wild Willy again! What shall their next adventure entail for the two? Find out in the NEXT EPISODE! [It then cuts to commercials]
LINCOLN: Oh, Ace Savvy, you did it again! You always have your life set out for yourself. Being all ripped and fighting crime while I- [He tried to flex his arm, but he got the cartoonish effect of his arm folding down at the bicep instead of a strong bump there] I got nothing. I mean, look at my family now. [We get flashes to each of the other upgraded Loud House members] Luan's gotten a better hold of her jokes now, Luna's gotten so much smarter in songwriting, Lola's become more generous, and Lisa is… THAT'S IT! [He snaps his fingers when the dots connect in his head] LISA!
[Cut to outside where Lisa's seen examining something with a notepad and pen in her arms. When we zoom out, we see she's watching Lana chowing down on ALL of their garbage like sushi. Despite basically gorging on inedible objects like plastic, metal, and paper, the tomboy just binge eats it all and burps immensely, which probably explains why she's looking a lot chubbier than ever before.]
LISA: So tell me, elder sister. You've inserted so many toxic chemicals into your digestive tract, yet NONE of it is giving you abdominal distention, internal bleeding, asthma symptoms, or all of the above?
LANA: [She pats her big belly in pride before replying] Nope, Lana feels very full, healthy, and all-around good! Very, very good! [Her stomach grumbles a bit, but she looks not at all worried about it. That's when Lincoln appears out of nowhere, scaring Lisa from her notetaking]
LINCOLN: Hey, Lisa. [he does a small wave]
LISA: GAH! [once she gets her stuff off the ground and hold her chest in panic, she recollects itself] Elder brother, please refrain from copying Lucy's mysterious teleportation gimmick. You wouldn't want your genius of a sister to suffer a heart attack at an early age, wouldn't you? [She asks while pointing her pen right at his nose]
LINCOLN: Sorry, but speaking about such things, I wonder… could science help give me superpowers? [Saying that first magical s-word made Lisa stop what she was doing to look at her brother directly]
LISA: Wait, what did you say?
LINCOLN: I said could science help give me superpowers?
LISA: [Lisa adjusts her glasses to kind of explain] Well Lincoln, I know you're someone who's into the world of fiction through your comics, but the thing is… stuff like gamma rays, radioactive insect bites, multi-colored serums, and being struck by lightning will NEVER give one powers. Otherwise, wouldn't people in Royal Woods and beyond have already become defenders by this point? [She points to each of her fingers as she lays out all those stereotypical hero origin events]
LINCOLN: [his head droops a bit as his expression basically changes to that of disappointment] Oh, I see. Well, thanks for hearing me out anyway, Lisa. [He's about to head back inside, but Lisa grabs his shoulder.]
LISA: HOWEVER, I can load up a simulation for you, one that feels so authentic, so REAL that you might as well have been in a world where you were born with superpowers. Wouldn't that suffice?
LINCOLN: [He taps his chin with his finger for a bit before replying] Hmm… sure, why not? [Cut to him being strapped down on Lisa's infamous experiment table as he's got these sci-fi headphones, goggles and finally helmet strapped to him]
LISA: Treat this simulation you'll have like it would be your new life. After all, what's good about fun when it ends… [Lincoln looks a bit concerned about what she meant by that, but he doesn't get to wander on this too much as his eyes cartoonishly swirl and get droopy before he's soon sucked into the simulation. When he wakes up, he's on the streets of Royal Woods and looking down, he sees he's BECOME Ace Savvy, down to the big muscular pegs and costume.]
LINCOLN: Oh sweet! I, I mean- [He clears his throat to start talking like a manly hero would] I, Ace Savvy, must now defend Royal Woods itself from the legions of EVIL! And fighting alongside me, One Eyed Jack! [He whistles so loudly that the windows around the neighborhood shatter before his sidekick comes, interestingly looking more like Clyde in his costume than the real O.E.J.]
ONE EYED JACK: YES, SIR! [He salutes and his voice and mannerisms sounds just like Clyde too, making Lincoln wonder if Lisa made this simulation personally for him… and chose to never tell him until now.] We shall now enact truth and justice ALL OVER! To the Savvymobile! [It drives here and Lincoln and Jack jump inside and they drive off]
LINCOLN: So, Clyde- er uh One Eyed Jack! Do you see any villains popping up on the Savvymobile's radar? [He points to it while driving]
ONE EYED JACK: No, not any that I- [He gasps loudly after taking a closer look] ACE SAVVY! All the villains are converging in one location about 5 miles away! Maybe they're going to form the Legion of Evil all over again?
LINCOLN: WELL THEN, LET'S GO STOP THEM AT ONCE! [He pushes the big red "Boost" button and the car's rocket engines on the back send it at super speed. We see the main villains Talking Trash Eater, Red Diamond, One Eyed Willy, Black Jack & The Kitty, the new zombie villain the Deadman's Hand, the Joker-esque bad guy known as Laughing Boy, and more. They're seen having taken over Ketchum Park while all the kids are seen running away crying or in fear.
TALKING TRASH EATER: Why are we just standing here? Why don't we just TRASH this place already?
RED DIAMOND: Trash, my dear, we need to draw out Ace Savvy, who knows if they- Ah, there they are! [Indeed, Lincoln and One Eyed Jack fly off a convenient ramp to land next to the villains in style. Once they get out of their car, the duo pose with their fists near their hips like if the camera was right on them]
LINCOLN: Now then, Legion of Evil! Are you all ready to quit your charade and turn yourself in for the good of everyone?
THE LEGION OF EVIL: NO!
ONE EYED JACK: Then prepare for battle! [Both sides charge in and the fight is truly intense. Think of cards being thrown, punches flying, the playground getting wrecked in various places, and in the end… the villains actually get one over on the duo, who are seen incredibly bruised and beat up]
LINCOLN: [In his thoughts] I don't get it. I'm, I'm Ace Savvy and I had One Eyed Jack on my side. This should've been easy! Unless… oh wait. [Wild Card Willy soon approaches him and puts his boot on the hero's chest in pride]
WILD CARD WILLY: Oh boo hoo-hoo, AMATEUR Savvy! All this time being bested by you and now I, or rather all of my friends, managed to beat you! How does defeat finally feel, eh "Hero"?
LINCOLN: [He begins weakly reaching into his utility belt as he laughs a bit] Oh trust me, Wild Card Willy. Failure will never be something I'll truly experience, it's only the bad guys who will always do so! NOW, FULL HOUSE GANG, I SUMMON YOU! [He tosses 10 cards out and from them, his siblings dressed up as his custom hero characters come out. They make quick work of the weakened and remaining villains before one of them, The High Card aka Lori offers her hand to Lincoln]
THE HIGH CARD: Need a hand, Ace Savvy? [He takes up and dusts himself off while One Eyed Jack gets up himself, at first blushing at the sight of High Card]
LINCOLN: So you see, One Eyed Jack? [He says while turning to his sidekick] There was nothing to fear about, especially with the Full House Gang always around to back us up!
ONE EYED JACK: Of course, Ace Savvy! I should've never doubted you! Now then… what now?
LINCOLN: Well I know where I'm going. [He then shouts up into the sky] Okay Lisa, I'm ready for this simulation to end… [but nothing happens. The wind keeps blowing, the sun remains shining, and High Card and One Eyed Jack look at their main hero with confused looks on their faces] LISA, I'M DONE PLAYING! I WANT OUT OF HERE!
THE HIGH CARD: Um, are you okay, Ace Savvy? [Lincoln gets frustrated and decides to rip off the areas around his face where the VR parts would be. Sure enough, doing this began to distort and corrupt the world around him before soon, it all faded to black. When his eyes opened, he saw himself back in Lisa's room, making him sigh in relief mentally]
LINCOLN: [In his thoughts] Ah yes, finally back home. Now I can- [But before he could say more out loud, he noticed he couldn't move, at all. He could converse with himself in his thoughts, but his lips were zipped shut and looking down, he noticed the room looked a lot bigger than his own body. However, he soon realized nothing grew, he shrunk as he sees his ordinary body is encased in some shiny plastic and posed to look like a figurine of himself. He tries to yell out as much as he could, but all he got were muffled shouts that only made his ears hurt. He soon heard a hammering sound nearby and looking over, he was shocked to see Lisa working on what looked like himself, but wearing a butler's uniform. Luan, however, soon walks to look at Lincoln directly]
LUAN: You know what they say, right Lisa? All work and no play makes Lincoln a dull boy, but all play and no works makes him a mere… toy. [She snickers evilly, showing that behind closed doors, this isn't the real Luan Loud.]
LISA: Yeah, yeah, sure, but my new invention's done. Introducing the Lic-O-Tron 2000. He'll be incredibly indentured to serve ALL of our goals, looks and feels human enough to pass by for the real Lincoln Loud, and his programming can be easily reset so we have nothing to worry about from his computer chip going haywire.
LUAN: To think, all of this was commissioned by Linguistic Lucy herself. The knockout drugs instilled into your VR headset equipment, the device that encased little Lincoln here with plastic, and the perpetual hero simulation to keep him in nirvana forever. Now, he won't have to worry about the future making him suffer things from us like being considered bad luck, losing his own costume creations at a con, being pummeled for long lost money, and so much more. Wait a minute Lisa… what if he wakes up though? [Lincoln tries to shake free, but couldn't. That's when he sees Lisa give her older sister a spray bottle with some clear liquid inside]
LISA: Not to worry, Luan II. He will be sold alongside the Loud Family Playset with that spray bottle to send him back to sleep if he ever does so. Why not try it out now to prove my point?
LUAN: Sure, got nothing better to do since we'll need to try another day to deal with Lily finally… [Lincoln tries to break free from his encasement, but the few sprays go up his nostrils and send him back to the simulation, right at the moment where he whistled to summon One Eyed Jack]
ONE EYED JACK: YES, SIR! [He salutes and repeats what he said before] We shall now enact truth and justice ALL OVER! To the Savvymobile! [He hops into the car, but Lincoln just breaks down on the road and cries]
LINCOLN: NO, NO, NOOOOOOOOO! [As the camera pans back up into the simulated sky, the episode ends….]